Enjoying the big smoke

I’VE never been a fan of the dread barbecue. ‘Cook inside, eat outside’ is my motto. God would surely not have invented cookers, ovens, hobs – even microwaves – if He had wanted us to rub two sticks together and cook a manky bit of chicken or some sausage-shaped sweepings from the abattoir floor on a rusty, bird poo-smattered metal grill outside in the rain.

A picnic, on the other hand, is invariably a delight. Prepare your dill-dusted poached salmon and bitter leaf