A letter TO MYSELF
To 13-year-old Carol
Carol Bouwer is a self-made mogul: she’s the CEO of Carol Bouwer Productions, founder of luxury brand CB Bags, a special advocate for Unicef SA, a member of Unicef’s Influential Women’s Circle, honorary trustee of the Norval Foundation and a brand partner for Lancôme. But at 13, she was a young girl with big dreams living in Soweto, in a country filled with violence, hatred – and hope.
Dear Carol,
Savour this moment. Savour this second, this minute, this hour. Breathe. It will all return as a distant yet longed-for memory.
Somehow, your yesterdays will acquire a rose tint as your tomorrows reveal your mettle. Was it always wondrous? It wasn’t. But you have chosen to heal. I see you, angel; I see the wonder – as wide-eyed today as you were then, curiosity intact.
You consume books, music, art and space with curiosity so apt for this ninth life, clutching that bag so tightly so you don’t lose your schoolbooks. Even though you know there is not much schooling going on, as these same armed forces will return tomorrow, sure to dispel any hopes of learning.
You have long since stopped crying over the inequalities, the glaring injustice! You now weep over the audacity: to interrupt your sleep four nights in a row with machine guns disguised as tools for the attainment of law and order. But what about peace?
Yesterday you ran towards the taxi, fearful that the man’s bullets would pelt your young body. You took your seat, relieved, but opened your eyes to realise it was not over: the faces of your brethren in the taxi scared you just the same. The dance began. You greeted the one close to you as if to ask the [‘daughter’], you realised how you had apportioned brutality to all you saw. Fear had gripped your heart so tightly that you’d missed the gentle eyes he had set upon your face.
