How to Rekindle a Long-Distance Friendship

Each installment of “The Friendship Files” features a conversation between The Atlantic’s Julie Beck and two or more friends, exploring the history and significance of their relationship.

This week she talks with a group of men who found connection during the pandemic’s early, isolated days. Spread out around the country, they had fallen out of touch, but the distance didn’t matter so much when they were all stuck at home. They started playing video games together, and the games became a cathartic time for them to chat about their feelings … while talking plenty of trash, of course. They discuss what they’ve learned about long-distance friendship and communication.

The Friends:

Bilal Hafeez, 26, a wealth manager who lives in San Francisco
Jake Kowalski, 31, a consultant who lives in Chicago
Nolan Krueger, 31, a psychology Ph.D. student who lives in San Francisco
Alex Uhlmann, 29, a city-government employee who lives in Memphis
Joel Walsh, 38, a STEM-education Ph.D. student who lives in Los Angeles

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.