JETHRO BOVINGDON

I KNEW I WAS SWINGING INTO A ONE-WAY lane the wrong way in the local supermarket. But I could see nothing was coming and was just going to nip into the very last spot on the aisle. I’d calculated my time committing this mild transgression would be less than half a second. As I did so, another car emerged from a parking space about ten bays down. The driver had to pause for perhaps two-tenths of a second. He was incensed.

A few days later I was reversing out of my driveway. A road closure nearby about big enough arrived so I reversed out as quickly as I could, selected first gear and attempted to join the flow of traffic. But a small van taking dad and daughter of about 12 on the afternoon school run wasn’t having any of it. He dived down the side of my car, hooted, gave me several signs of his displeasure and was generally a complete twat about it. Again, if he’d have lifted the throttle for a second or less, all would have been fine and peaceful.