There’s a before and after in Dr Joanne Drayton’s life. The “before” was marriage to an Anglican cleric, mother of two sons and a comfortable middle-class life in Christ-church. The “after” is every moment since the teacher/writer fell in love with a woman and upended not only her life but that of her family and her partner’s family.
But here’s the bit where it gets really messy: this was back in 1989, when society wasn’t always kind to lesbians, especially those who were married mothers.
As Drayton writes in her new book, The Queen’s Wife (Penguin Random House), the decision to partner with Sue Marshall, a graphic designer-turned-artist and teacher, earned the couple opprobrium from every side.
“We were spat at, ostracised and even hit on by a creepy guy who wanted a three-some,” says Drayton from the Auckland home she’s shared with Marshall, aged 70, since July 2000.
“We fell as far from grace as it was possible to. Leaving our marriages to be together was seen as transgressing what it meant to be a wife and mother, because although it was acceptable to raise children as a widow or as an abandoned wife, you couldn’t do so as a lesbian.”
Drayton is used to
