You set up a meal train when you learn that he is sick, and dozens of people compete to make dinners that they hope will have meaning and leave them in the cooler on the porch between 5 and 6 pan. for the wife and children and visiting relatives to share. You don’t know if your friend can eat any of it. You do not ring the doorbell. You include a bottle of wine.
You set up a Facebook group and invite people who also love your friend to join it so there is one place to get updates and share memories and diverting stories. On the days your friend feels well enough, he reads the posts himself. On the days he doesn’t, his wife reads the posts aloud.
You post a funny video of a baby to the group just to make your friend laugh and then wonder if that was a bad idea because maybe babies will remind him of the grandchildren he will never meet.
