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"You’ll doubtless want to know why Mr Dear is standing on a chair in the kitchen while dressed as Kermit the Frog.
Let me first explain the chair. It’s all to do with smoke alarms, which at Dear Towers are our sworn enemy.
Yes, I know we should be very grateful to our smoke alarms for their service through the years. They have maintained a ceaseless vigil and kept us safe from fire (although that hasn’t been a particularly demanding task, as we’ve not had anything remotely resembling