If you ever see me getting on to your train, please don’t be alarmed. I may look suspicious as my eyes scan the entire carriage, but it’s crunchers of crisps I’m searching for, not criminals on the run.
I’d like to think my noisy-eater-avoidance skills are SAS standard. Sitting as far away as possible from gum chewers, schoolkids with smelly tortilla chips or anyone carrying a brown-paper takeaway bag is a no-brainer.
Yet some of the most serious offenders are shameless. Just when I think it’s safe to settle in