Well, This Is Exhausting: Essays

Written by Sophia Benoit

Narrated by Sophia Benoit

From Bustle columnist and Twitter sensation Sophia Benoit, this “charming and often laugh-out-loud funny” (Vogue) memoir-in-essays explores the ins and outs of modern womanhood—from finding feminism, the power of pop culture, and how to navigate life’s constant double standards—perfect for fans of Shrill and PEN15.

Like so many women, Sophia spent her formative years struggling to do the “right” thing—to make others comfortable, to take minimal and calculated risks, to live up to society’s expectations—only to realize that there was so little payoff to this tiresome balancing act. Tired of trying so hard, Sophia finally let go of the crushing pressure to be perfect.

She navigates the highs and lows of the dating world (high: being a beta tester for Bumble; low: hastily shaving her legs before a hotel hookup and getting blood all over the sheets), and walks the line between being a “chill” girl and making sure her boyfriend’s nonchalance about altitude sickness doesn’t get him killed. She learns what it means to be a feminist, how to embrace her own voice, and when to listen to women who have been through more and have been doing the work longer.

With topics ranging from how to be the life of the party (even when you have crippling anxiety), to an ill-fated consultation with a dietician who deemed Sophia’s overindulgence in ketchup a serious health risk, to a masterful argument for why no one should judge you for having an encyclopedic knowledge of reality TV, Well, This Is Exhausting is not only “one of the funniest books you’ll read this year, but it’s also one of the most important” (Shondaland).

• Language: English
• Publisher: Simon & Schuster Audio
• Release date: Jul 13, 2021
• ISBN: 9781797127569

Sophia Benoit

Sophia Benoit is a writer and comedian who grew up in Missouri and was correctly voted “Most Likely to Never Come Back.” She writes sex and relationship advice for Bustle and GQ and has had bylines in Allure, Refinery29, The Cut, The Guardian, and more. Sophia does not have an MFA from anywhere, and probably isn’t going back to grad school, much to the chagrin of her father. She lives in Los Angeles with her boyfriend Dave, but usually only spouses make it into author bios, so forget about him.

Reviews for Well, This Is Exhausting

[DiannaJohnson · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Not for 50+ age group, IMO. Very "millennial" appropriate? She seems to have an issue with "whites." Frequently refers to sexuality in LGBTQ lingo. I guess the cool thing today when writing a book is to pepper it with repetitive foul language. I'm no prude, but after awhile "fuck," "masturbate," & "horny" lose their funny edge. I did, however, enjoy her pragmatism towards the life she was born into, the responsibilities she learned very early in life, and how they prepared her for a successful, sel-supporting career. She isn't 35 living in her parents' basement. A LOT can be said for that. Kudos.

[Cheryll Merritt · Rating: 1 out of 5 stars]

The author has a victim mentality about everything and while I feel compelled to finish every book I start, I couldn't bear to hear her say "cis" one more time. Then when she expressed the view that small serendipities were the universe's way of trying to make up for capitalism, I was done. Where does she think the income to pay for entertainment (such as her book) comes from? Not socialism. She is also a sex fiend while at the same time really disliking men, or at least most men, and that dychotomy took up a lot of space. I read for enjoyment, particularly when the book is supposedly comedic. This was neither enjoyable nor comedic.

[Amy Fortin · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This was so dead on for me as a human, it was almost embarrassing at times. “Strumming my pain with (her) fingers…” Wonderful take on the her place in the world EVERY young woman should read!

[Maria Grzywacz · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I shared this book and thereby recommended it to my friends even before I had finished it, which I would not usually do. Don't judge the book by its cover, and don't praise it before you're done, is my usual mantra. I'm glad I "broke" it for Sophia.
"Well, This Is Exhausting" is a story told by a modern woman, who... isn't trying to be anyone else - in the book that is! Because Sophia so poignantly addresses all the roles that a modern woman adopts. She also brilliantly and with wit describes the times when she acted, took on different roles, faked things, did not listen to own inner voice. This book was to me SO relatable, and at the same time I was so aware of Sophia not generalizing and not telling me how to feel or what to thing, but simply sharing her experiences with me - the reader.
I hope this review is not too confusing - I really liked the book, and even though I also disagreed with Sophia at times, I still think this was a very valuable read!