Not a Lot of People Know That
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About this ebook
Not a Lot of People Know That is a book of facts. Not a lot of people know these facts. David Hailwood and FJ Riley know them. Not a lof of people know who David Hailwood and FJ Riley are, but with facts as accurate as these, they soon will.
David Hailwood
Half man, half cabbage, Dave Hailwood can often be found hanging around near drain covers on a never ending quest to bag himself a Ninja Turtle. He writes comedy material for anyone who'll take it, and occassionally dabbles with cartooning and comic script writing. He has a blog at: www.davidhailwood.blogspot.com which he occassionally remembers to update. FJ Riley is a man. In his spare time, he dances with wolves has a collection of rare allergies. His allergies currently include pink marshmallows, birch trees, balsamic vinegar, cotton wool and all human contact.
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Not a Lot of People Know That - David Hailwood
INTRODUCTION
First of all, a big hello to everyone who downloaded this ebook under the mistaken assumption that it’s Michael Caine’s autobiography. We apologise for having deceived you in such an underhand manner. Rest assured, the title is the only deceptive thing about this book.
Michael Caine’s actual autobiography, Blowing The Bloody Doors Off is available from all good second-hand bookshops (price in pencil on the inside cover). Funnily enough, Blowing The Bloody Doors Off would be a fitting title for this book. Through the course of its informative, enlightening and thoroughly educational chapters, we intend to blow the bloody doors off
received wisdom, reliability, validity and indeed, the very concept of knowledge itself.
There are many other books of facts available. We’re not suggesting for one moment that these books contain inaccurate information or things the authors made up down the pub. We’re not suggesting that at all.
For some reason, the morons at Philistine Press have decided to categorise this book as humour
. We’re not sure why. Trust us when we say there is nothing even remotely humorous about this book. We sincerely hope you enjoy it.
David Hailwood and FJ Riley
SCIENCE
Snow is by far the greatest insulator on the planet. As anyone who has ever slept in an igloo will tell you, their ability to retain heat makes for an extremely warm and cosy interior. Igloos are, in fact, so warm on the inside that they inevitably melt shortly after they are built. The few remaining Inuit people who still live in igloos often have to get up three or four times in the night to rebuild their houses.
***
There is no such thing as calcium. When Dmitri Mendeleev put the periodic table together in 1869, he added an extra element, which he called calcium, from the Greek, meaning imaginary substance
. In his own words, this was intended as a joke.
However, to Mendeleev’s horror, thousands of copies of his periodic table were printed with the extra element included. The scientist was faced with the dilemma of either owning up to his stunt, or disguising it as fact. As his biographer, V.W. Groomspek notes, "Towards the