Waking the Wilderness

By Clayton King

New Year’s Eve on the outskirts of a small logging town deep within the North Cascade Mountains, Lina Cousins, a struggling teenage girl, prepares to meet her boyfriend, Luke Tollman, for a special New Year’s Eve celebration. When plans unexpectedly change, it sets in motion a spiraling web of deception, confrontation, and obsession—with tragic consequences that some will not survive...

• Language: English
• Publisher: Clayton King
• Release date: Aug 3, 2010
• ISBN: 9780982912508

Clayton King

Clayton King, a pastor, evangelist, missionary, and author, has been dedicated since age 14 to proclaiming the gospel and calling Christians to live out the life of Jesus. He has spoken to millions of people in 30-plus countries and written numerous books, including Dying to Live, Amazing Encounters with God, and 12 Questions to Ask Before You Marry, coauthored with his wife, Sharie. Clayton loves good books, the outdoors, strong coffee, dirt bikes and four-wheelers, and especially his wife and children.

Book preview

Acknowledgement

What began with a request from friends to share my experience building an off-grid cabin in the North Cascade wilderness, quickly broke free to become this work of fiction. Thus was launched my writing career, for which I am eternally grateful to my mother, Jimmie King, who while trapped with me in a snowstorm at the cabin for over twenty days, encouraged me to take up writing. She also endured my first drafts with warm support and a critical eye as I learned the craft of writing.

In addition, much gratitude goes to those who contributed time and effort to the creation of this novel. Most notably my critique group consisting of Jimmie King, James King, Beth Renshaw, Karl Chan-Brown, Kay Matier, and Kay Quall. Their honesty, expertise, and sound advice, including many sweet twists to the story, live in all the good parts—the rest are mine. Thanks also to Alaine Borgias, who edited the final manuscript; her mastery of the English language is something I can only dream of attaining.

Finally, thanks to the town of Darrington and the surrounding Northwest communities, who daily demonstrate that hospitality and generosity are alive and well in this spectacular and beautiful country.

Thanks everyone for seeing me through.

Waking the Wilderness

Table of Contents

Dedication

Acknowledgement

Earlier Today…

Prologue

Six Years Ago…

The Spark of Obsession

Five Years Ago…

Expectations

Three Years Ago…

Change in the Valley

Boondockers

Breaking Ground

Outcast Christmas

Two Years Ago…

Testing Fatherhood

Wilderness Karma

Building the Dream

Drift Boat

Halloween Tricks

Signs of Unraveling

Home Remedy

Beware of Glitter

Irresponsibility

Clouds of Fury

Take Down

Consequences

Fired Up

Mistakes

Last Year…

New Neighbors

The Midnight Shift

Doing Time

Keeping Watch

Hollow Dreams

Candy Wrappers

Priorities of the Law

Family Planning

Paranoia

Deputy 101

Trophies

Official Advice

Chaining the Gate

New Friends

Garden Mystery

Price of Freedom

Luke’s Recollection

Break Up

Holiday Preparations

The First Thanksgiving

The Discovery

Confrontation

Professionals

Arrivals and Departures

The First Christmas

Lina’s Recollection

Baggage

Innocent Invitation

Planning the Surprise

Day Before Yesterday… (New Year’s Eve)

Calling in a Favor

New Years Eve Celebration

The Silver Locket

House Calls

Waiting Games

Luke’s Trailer

Holly’s Return

Introductions

Trailer Trash

Family Pride

Waking the Wilderness

Gunfire

The LastLullaby

Yesterday… (New Year’s Day)

Family Duty

Manhood

Today…

A Shadow of Truth

Epilogue

About the Author

Earlier Today…

Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

- Benjamin Franklin (1706 - 1790)

Prologue

9:37 a.m. Tuesday, January 2

What do I remember? I’ll tell ya what I remember, snowflakes big as woodchips falling so thick they nearly chocked the daylight. It was New Year’s Eve six years ago, a Monday if I recall, the very day our misery began.

Crazy’s what that day was. The local paper covering the mess riled up everybody ‘round the North Cascades, especially out here in the Suiattle River valley, my family’s valley.

I was twelve and Sis was nineteen. Towing me behind without a lick of sense down that primitive road, she was dead-set on her ‘mission of mercy’ to the Tollmans’ homestead. I didn’t know at the time it was her could use the mercy. Now you gonna hear some folks ‘round these parts say if the Renshaws didn’t con the Tollmans out a their place, things might not a turned out so bad. Anyone says that, it ain’t so. Renshaws is good people. I’d even call ’em friends if they wasn’t from down-below. They’s a mess better’n Luke and his folks, for sure.

I can still see them tall cedar trees creeping up on either side of the road. But it was them fresh tire tracks through the deep snow that Sis was stuck on like a bloodhound. She still had hope back then. After all, it was gonna be her first New Year’s Eve with the jerk.

Yeah, six years ago was a day you can’t imagine. It was a day much like today….

Except today, I became a man.

Six Years Ago…

"Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths…

I would spread the cloths under your feet:

But I, being poor, have only my dreams;

I have spread my dreams under your feet;

Tread softly because you tread on my dreams."

-William Butler Yeats (1865-1939)

The Spark of Obsession

Monday, December 31

While mid-winter gripped the surrounding wilderness, the silence broke with each frantic footstep as Lina Cousins hustled through the deepening snow to deliver the only care package she could afford. The lid covering the hot, homemade chicken noodle soup rattled over the thin metal pot, as she trailed a fresh set of tire tracks down the county road.

See that! her 12-year-old brother, Kolt, yelled from behind. He swung the lantern clutched in his gloved hand toward the dark understory to their left.

Ain’t nothing there, Lina said, exasperated. Why I always gotta watch this brat…

You’s a liar, Kolt wheezed, sloshing behind, as he struggled to match her stride. Something’s gonna smell that soup and jump me cause there’s more white meat on my butt than in that pot. His eyes widened. That why you brought me? For bait if we crosses a bear?

Don’t be a baby. Luke needs this soup to get him better. And I’ll get a spend New Years with my boyfriend after all.

Twenty minutes later, Lina hesitated shin-deep in snow, staring across a dim forest clearing at the Tollman family’s isolated homestead. Interior lights cast an inviting glow onto the porch of the small cabin, with its heavy plank door. What am I waiting for? I come this far.

Exhausted from their hike, Kolt slogged his way through the snow to a tire swing hanging from a nearby hemlock that towered over their heads. When he wedged his chubby butt into the swing, the branch above creaked and popped, dumping a cascade of frozen white powder over his coppery hair, then onto his broad shoulders.

Brrr… fricking tree! he complained through a cloudburst of white breath. Why I gotta come, anyway? The lantern light fluttered as he beat his arms for warmth.

Why you think? You know Mama went into town cuz great-aunt Mable slipped and fell on the ice, Lina replied, glaring at her brother. And Papa say if I don’t keep you out a trouble ‘til he get home, I’ll be cutting vine maple to serve up my own switch. Your own fault for being a twit. Now quit flapping ‘fore you put the light out.

Lowering his arms, Kolt pushed back with his snow-caked boots and started swinging. My feet’s cold and I’m hungry. Gimme some soup.

Ain’t for you! Just wait while I drop it off and—

I ain’t dangling out here by myself in the dark.

Do as I say or I swear…! Now give me the lantern. Balancing the pot in one hand, she stretched out the palm of her other.

Make me! he dared, kicking back onto his toes and jerking the light away.

Lina’s hazel eyes narrowed with her own version of their father’s get-a-switch look. Oh, fine. But stay put.

As she tromped away, the surrounding shadows shifted and footsteps crunched in the snow behind her. When she whirled around, Kolt bumped into her. While shuffling to keep her footing, a portion of thin broth sloshed onto Lina’s bare hand.

Dang you! she snapped before licking the cool greasy liquid off her fingers. Get your butt back there or I’ll dip your head’n soup and tie ya to the tree for a grizzly snack.

With a huff, Kolt stomped back to the swing. I hate you! he yelled.

She watched her brother settle into the tire again and set it spinning.

Bite me! Kolt shouted into the dark before burying his face in the crook of one arm. Like a cheap warning beacon, the lantern weakly illuminated the surrounding trees as he slowly spun, waiting to be abandoned with his childhood fears.

Turning in her pink sneakers, Lina blazed a path through the fresh snow toward the Tollmans’ cabin. Icy crystals clung to her white socks and clumped on the hem of her blue dress.

Recalling what had brought her to this moment, her stomach soured. It had begun with the emergency phone call hours earlier when her mother had rushed off to Sauk Prairie, on the other side of the river. But it was the second call thirty minutes later from her boyfriend, Luke, that had ruined her plans for a special New Year’s Eve celebration.

Hey, babe, Luke had said over the phone. I gotta cancel our hook-up tonight.

What… why? she whined, We’re s’posed to spend the tonight together. Like before. You promised me!

Trust me. You don’t want what I got.

I don’t mind. It seems like forever since I last seen you. Trembling, she looked down at her mother’s blue farm dress that she had altered for the occasion.

I’s set and ready and won’t stay long. There’s—

Listen—, he interrupted.

—something important I gotta tell ya, she pressed.

Face it, girl, tonight ain’t happening, he said with a weak cough. Tell me later. I’ll call ya in a couple days. We’ll get together then, I promise. The phone line went dead.

When the day began to wane along with her New Year’s Eve dreams, Lina was unable to contain the growing turmoil of her emotions—or her news. Scrapping their original date, she decided to deliver a ‘care package’ instead. How can he be mad about that? He didn’t make me promise not to come.

A deep breath of biting cold air drew her back to the present. Her anxiety began to settle as she stepped onto the front porch of the Tollmans’ cabin. This’ll show Luke how good I am for him… how much we belong together. Ignoring the numbness in her feet and the dryness of her mouth, she rehearsed her greeting.

Hi, sweetie, you hungry? She groaned. Sounds too much like them ladies at the food bank.

Hey, champ, I’s worried so brought soup to get ya better. That’s good.

Cuz I love you so much and I got a wonderful surprise for you. That’s really good!

Peeking through the front window into the brightly lit living room, she saw the familiar plush green couch and cast-iron wood-burning stove. Feeling bolstered, she stepped up to the front door and immediately recognized the song blaring within the cabin. She grinned and the music dispelled any lingering doubt whether he cared for her. It was the Tar-heel tune ‘Promise,’ by Jimmie Jewel. That was playing on the radio our first night together. Luke even said it could be ‘our’ song if I like:

I can’t offer you perfection,

cause I can’t promise to be true;

But I’ll never get to heaven,

cause I’m never leaving you…

Lina’s chest filled with warmth as she anticipated being with her love again. Even sick, he’s thinking ‘bout me! What’s he gonna do once he knows I’m having a baby? Her breath quickened with the possibilities.

Reaching out to let herself in, she was surprised to find the door locked. Why’s he done that? Ain’t like we’re in the city. She knocked, wondering if Luke’s folks were home to take care of him. Probably cain’t hear my tapping over the music. Maybe he’s in bed trying to get some rest.

Stepping off the porch, she practically danced her way along the side of the cabin, and then slowed as she approached the outer corner of Luke’s bedroom. Muffled groans and faint bangs resounded over the loud folksy music. How sick is he? She gasped sharply and the cold air bit the back of her throat. What if he’s dying!?

Her heart pounded as she turned the corner and headed for the back door. The banging inside lightened. Was he having himself a bad dream? I’ll cheer him up. With a deep breath, she smiled as she stepped onto the deck in front of Luke’s bedroom window. Red sheer curtains and low light from a bedside lamp softened the interior. A thrilling warm flush coursed through her body with a single thought. Maybe he’s naked.

Lina darted a glance at the bed and, as effective as a backhand, she was jolted from her reverie, crashing into a chaos of emotions. NO!

Standing rigid, unable to tear her eyes away, she witnessed the unimaginable within the very room she had made love to Luke. The soft banging inside became rhythmic. Then she glimpsed an empty wine bottle lying atop a discarded dress—a familiar flowered print—with a garish orange poppy pattern on white cotton.

This cain’t be happening!

Nauseated, Lina focused on the bedroom scene; the older woman inside groaned with delight, wearing nothing but a heart-shaped silver locket that bounced at her throat with each thrust from the 17-year-old boy on top. Lina shuddered. Suddenly the naked woman looked toward the window and a strangled cry broke from her heaving chest. She scrambled out from under Luke, hastily grabbing the corner of a red sheet to conceal the bare beauty of her mature figure.

Frustrated by the interruption, Luke complained, Where you going Holly? Noticing the woman’s gaze, he twisted to face the window, putting his manhood on full display. He immediately recognized the shadowed form outside and the flush of color drained from his face.

Aw, hell! he groaned.

Lina’s chest constricted under the weight of betrayal and fragments of her shattered emotions tore at her heart. Her hands added their own treachery as the pot of cold soup slipped from her fingers. Greasy globs of congealed chicken broth and sagging noodles splattered down the front of her dress before the empty metal container hit the wooden deck with a clank. While her eyes burned with tears of despair, a dark corner of her mind smoldered with fury that quickly sparked into obsession.

Luke’s mine! You cain’t have him, Mama!

The bedroom window shattered as Lina slammed her upper body through the glass, exchanging one pain for another.

Five Years Ago…

"Beware how you take away hope from another human being."

-Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. (1841 - 1935)

Expectations

Friday, June 14

Near the edge of the forest clearing on the Tollmans’ property, the surrounding brush was thick with the promise of summer as Lina reclined on to her elbows in the middle of a soft pink blanket. Under a black hand-knit sweater, her cotton dress stretched uncomfortably tight over the mound of her pregnancy.

Smiling, she recalled the attention she had received in town since the tragedy New Year’s Eve. All the boys stare like they’s the ones guilty, when it’s Luke should be paying me more attention. And them ladies eye me like I’m crazy just cuz I’m not married and expecting. Hell, I done nothing half them ain’t done themselves. And it ain’t none a their business who the daddy is. Never mind them, it’s just a matter a time—even my counselor says I won’t go single forever.

Despite the late afternoon sun, a cool dampness clung to the spring air as she unbuttoned the front of her sweater. Stroking the firmness of her rounded tummy, she felt the baby shift as if it were unhappy with the sudden chill. Lina groaned in her own discomfort.

Once the baby’s born Luke’s gonna do right by me. Won’t he be excited when he learns it’s a boy? More so when he hears I’m naming it Jayden, after his middle name. Family can call the boy JD for short.

She retrieved a small shoulder purse to collect her one-hitter, a thumb-sized pink metal pipe, and her mother’s ornate heart-shaped silver lighter. Caressing the sculpted relief of holly leaves on the lighter, she then raised the pipe to her lips and ignited the sticky brown marijuana packed within. Just a quick hit, then I’ll quit ‘til the baby’s born.

The late spring sun fell behind the nearby peaks as she inhaled. The familiar ritual tempered her anxiety beneath a soothing rush of pungent smoke. Smothering the small embers with the tip of her pinky, she clasped the tools of her happiness and sprawled back onto the moss-cushioned blanket under the sheltering cedar. She was glad to be off her feet. I feel big as a mountain ready to erupt.

Bringing her right hand to her face, she traced the pink scar running from the hairline on her forehead, down to the corner of her right eye, and ending just below her ear. She felt a momentary guilt, knowing her father was still paying for the surgery. Withdrawing her hand, she let it drop to the blanket beside her. Her gaze softened as it trailed after the pale smoke curling lazily from between her lips. The gray tendrils receded past nearby cedar trees and faded before reaching the spot where the tire swing used to hang. Only the frayed rope remained, still dangling from a chokehold on the lowest branch of the towering hemlock. Drawing her attention upward, the ancient evergreen dwarfed the surrounding trees while a high gentle breeze pulled at the green witch’s hair moss that draped the upper boughs.

Relighting the pipe, she inhaled another smoky breath and a mellow high released the soreness in her back. Temporarily free from the ache of motherhood, her mind wandered well-worn memories: Luke’s strong hands thrusting her into the air on the old tire swing; their laughter echoing as her dress billowed in the breeze; his warm fingers snaking their way inside her dress. Longing brought a sweet flush to her cheeks and she burned with a desire for a second chance to be with her love.

He’ll come ‘round or I’ll make him, now JD’s on the way.

Humming their song, she waited for her mind to settle before reaching into her purse to withdraw a yellowing fold of newsprint. Clear tape held the frayed halves of the clipping together. After much wear, the text was still legible. Raising the faded print before her eyes, her hand trembled, making it difficult to read what she had memorized by heart.

The Darrington Boondocker

January 2nd

Tragedy Strikes Tollman Cabin

DARRINGTON, WA. – An early morning fire on New Year’s Day swept through the Tollman family’s remote cabin on the Suiattle River, sending a thick column of black smoke throughout this scenic mountain valley. No injuries were reported in the blaze that destroyed the cabin and left the Tollman family homeless.

Seventeen-year-old Luke Tollman stated, The place was fine when I left to get my father…. When me and him got back our place was torched.

Abe Tollman, owner of the destroyed cabin and long-time resident of Darrington, said, It’s not our place to question the Lord’s will. But plain and simple it’s a tragedy what’s happened to my family.

In a related story, earlier today Deputy John Braun found a burgundy Ford Taurus registered to Mrs. Holly Cousins at the Skagit Transit Station in Mount Vernon. The 41-year-old mother of two had been reported missing the same day as the fire by her husband, Cecil Cousins, who is offering a $500 reward for any information leading to the safe return of his wife.

In a surprising turn of events for the local community, the Skagit County Sheriff’s Department has identified Holly Cousins as ‘a person of interest’ wanted for questioning regarding the Tollman fire. Anyone with information should contact Deputy John Braun of the Skagit County Sheriff’s Department immediately.

Meticulously refolding the article, Lina put it away before relighting her pipe. Taking another hit, she held the sweet smoke in her lungs before releasing it into the wilderness breeze. She relaxed with a smile and her mind drifted into deeper daydreams of a happier future.

Won’t be long ‘fore we’re together again.

Three Years Ago…

"Aromatic plants bestow no spicy fragrance while they grow;

but crush'd or trodden to the ground,

diffuse their balmy sweets around."

-Oliver Goldsmith (1728 – 1774)

Change in the Valley

Friday, May 28

Warner Renshaw leaned forward onto the steering wheel and peered out the bug-streaked windshield. His white Toyota truck hugged the steep gravel slope of Wa-Wilkin Road as it descended into the remote Suiattle River valley. The primitive surface veered to the right, beyond which the forest greenery parted to reveal Whitehorse Mountain’s snow-clad prominence rising up from the adjoining valley.

That’s beautiful! Warner exclaimed, and then smiled at his wife, Kendra, whose trim figure barely compressed the passenger seat.

Pretty. This will be a nice change…, she said with a smile while gripping the handhold above her window. If we survive. Peering out the passenger window, she watched the steep drop-off race by directly outside her door.

Oblivious to the surrounding beauty, Warner’s giant schnauzer, Bella, crowded onto the center console. The 120-pound canine, easily mistaken for a young black bear, propped her shaggy muzzle on the front dashboard and stared ahead while her nose smeared wet streaks across the windshield.

You as excited as we are, girl? Warner asked, reaching over to scratch the long, curling black hair behind the dog’s ears.

Should she be sitting there? Kendra asked.

She’s fine. I wouldn’t let anything happen to her.

Well, I hope you wouldn’t let a child of ours do that, she said with mild disapproval.

Warner smiled. Of course I would.

-- : --

The seventeen-month-old boy toddled over to the center of the clearing to pick through the cool strands of jade-colored moss. Grabbing a handful of charred remains, he crushed them between his fingers. The crisp cinders stained his hands with streaks of charcoal.

From her favorite spot near the edge of the Tollmans’ clearing, Lina propped herself on one elbow and watched her son, Jayden. She couldn’t help shaking her head.

Three damn years since the fire and I’m still waiting. What I gotta do if bearing that brat ain’t even brought Luke back? I should tell the deputy what really happened that night. No, if I broke my promise like that, Luke’d tell John what he knows.

Wrestling with a familiar depression, Lina reached for her small shoulder purse and retreated into the comfort of a familiar ritual. Shortly, she found an escape from loneliness in the deep inhale of pungent smoke. As she sprawled back onto the blanket, her attention dissolved with the pale gray wisp as it rose into the stillness of the woodland air. Closing her eyes, she tried to drift into thoughts of happier times.

-- : --

The nearby peaks signaled an early dusk was approaching when the road leveled off and the Renshaws entered a shadowed stretch of untamed forest broken by the last streamers of sunlight. Nearing their destination, Warner anxiously watched for the landmarks provided by their realtor: a small faded sign for a tree farm, now abandoned; a short pullout leading to a primitive campsite; and finally a towering hemlock draped with witch’s hair. The tree marked the northwest boundary of the Renshaws’ new Suiattle riverfront property.

His excitement mounted in anticipation of the chance to become more acquainted with his wilderness dream. After all, it’s going to be our home. Then Kendra and I can get back to enjoying life without the hassle from the masses. Maybe even have a family of our own….

Retrieving her cell phone from the dashboard, Kendra glanced at the small display. No service, she said, before tossing the phone back onto the dashboard.

We’ll work something out by the time we move here, Warner replied. Let’s just enjoy the campout. I can’t wait to explore our home together.

"Future home. Remember, you have to build it first," she said smiling.

Driving along the boundary of the small acreage, Warner was wondering what the early loggers must have experienced in the remote wilderness when a flash of pink caught his eye.

What was that? Slowing the truck, he glanced through the trees lining the road and searched for the source of color.

I hope no one’s camping on our property, Kendra said.

Reaching the end of Wa-Wilkin Road, Warner turned onto a long neglected drive that led to a grassy clearing surrounded by tall red cedar trees. Pulling to an abrupt stop, he and Kendra stared out the windshield. A toddler sat alone in the clearing, gazing at them with an innocent face streaked with black.

-- : --

The marijuana’s effect subsided and Lina opened her hazel eyes. She lazily watched the thin orange clouds drift across the evening’s deep indigo dome. Sprawled on the worn blanket, she found her breeze-rustled skirt bunched about her hips, exposing her slender legs. When a soft rustle sounded to her right, she jerked upright with a sudden feeling of anxiety mixed with guilt.

"Damn it,