The Avant Guardian: Volume One: Strange You Can Believe In

By Flabby Hoffman

Flabby Hoffman has fought against the corporate ethos which is destroying our country for many years with a type of revolution he defines as The Revolution Of Empowerment. In today's day and age, the problems we face, the evil that men do, cannot be defeated through destruction. The only way to make the world a better place is through the empowerment of what is good in us. Awareness, inspiration, informed consumerism, activism...the tools are fading, but still exist.

The corporations and their media/politician puppets have consolidated and intensified their attacks our the human condition. When you consider the technological advances since the previous time they took power during Hitler and Stalin's times, we must recognize that we are on the cusp of the eternal oblivion of our humanity....the need has never been greater for an infusion of life force.

The Avant Guardian is meant as a catalyst to inspire a greater level of engagement of the people in our culture to rise up and protect what still remains that is good amongst us. Using a humorous and satirical look at the insanity of our society perhaps can make being informed fun instead of scary. A few heartless corporate maniacs have for years been shaping mainstream culture into a horrifying parade of sterile emotionless drivel. News is a joke. Music has been converted into mind control and movies have replaced character development with special effects as plot devices. Its all intended to turn us into machines.

This book draws the line in the sand and serves as a beacon for those who have had enough of having their souls kicked to the curb.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Flabby Hoffman
• Release date: Feb 28, 2013
• ISBN: 9780989099608

Flabby Hoffman

(Scroll down for a selection of Flabby's very sexy and desirable e-Books) Flabby Hoffman is a prolific renaissance man. He has released 3 albums (including a new triple disc/4 hour long masterpiece) with his 50 member strong Flabby Hoffman Trio, written the 5th longest book in the English language, produces a weekly hour long variety TV series in Chicago, had a long running radio series at full time online radio station, is one of the largest independent promoters of live shows on the Chicago rock and comedy circuits and performs regularly both with his band and as a professional host for a wide variety of shows...all in his spare time. His profound expressiveness and diverse productions have trail blazed their way across the Chicago scene for 10 years. In that time his efforts as a local TV producer, live nightclub show booker on the Chicago rock and comedy circuit and various original productions have given voice to thousands of local Chicago artists from every creative discipline always with an eye towards encouraging every to follow their organic creative instincts and never restricting their vision or editing their content. Flabby's credo is: To support and encourage the growth of what's good in people. The "Flabby" character was born almost a decade ago when some friends suggested a thematic persona idea as the centerpiece for a Chicago TV series that had roots in humor, politics and performance would be a fun and powerful idea. That TV series, called Flabby Hoffman, made its debut in 2004 at CAN-TV, Chicago Cable Channel 19 and has appeared every Thursday night from 11:30pm to 12:30am ever since. In that time 100's of bands, solo performers, dance troupes, comedians, artisans and various creative minded folks have made their way across the TV show. The bulk of the work, has fallen to Flabby who has for a number of years done most of the camera work, editing, line producing, writing and occasional performing all by himself for a series that has to air 48 original episodes every calendar year with each one being 58 minutes in length. That is three times more airtime than a network TV series whose budgets allow for them to sometimes have as many as 100 people or more working on that production. You wont see a lot of glitz or polish on his show, but Flabby has created an opportunity for people to get the ball rolling in a truly open environment. In addition to the TV series, Flabby has become one of the busiest local promoters on the Chicago scene. With over 500 shows booked at nearly every club on the Chicago rock circuit and now booking comedy shows too, it offers great easy access for performers to get their foot in the door at a wide variety of venues in an effort to cut through the red tape for people and defeat that old Catch 22 of not being able to get gigs before having a track record at clubs, and not being able to get a track record at clubs cause they can't get booked. Flabby has multiple shows he's booked at such noted Chicago clubs as the Double Door, Empty Bottle, Martyrs, Abbey Pub, Elbo Room, Bottom Lounge and others. He also pioneered a fun concept called Flabby Fest. Held at Abbey Pub, there have now been three Flabby Fests which were designed as weekend long events using two stages to put on an indoor festival. Flabby Fest 3 included 40 bands, solo performers, 3 hours worth of comedy...all taped to gain footage for the Flabby TV series. Most important to Flabby however is his own creative pursuits. Having written close to 2500 songs in his life, his connection to the artistic impulse is strong. His band, The Flabby Hoffman Trio (which features anywhere from 5 to a dozen or more members for each show) has played over 150 gigs including multiple stints all the top venues in their hometown of Chicago and a wide variety of regional festivals. They have just released their 3rd album entitled "Coup De Ta-Ta's" which very well could be one of the longest recorded original music albums in rock history (4 hours over 3 discs with 50 new songs). The album includes contributions from 50 immensely gifted local musicians who make up the extended family that is the Flabby Hoffman Trio. But all this is just the tip of the iceberg in regards to the output of this uncommon and profound visionary. For if "art" is a representation of the means of expanding our humanity, than Flabby Hoffman is undeniably one of the chief exponents of that struggle. At the same time that Flabby was creating this album, he was also writing a book of mind boggling scope and intensity. Called "The Avant Guardian," this tome is no less than 730,000 words long which makes it the 5th longest book in the English language. The Avant Guardian attempts to use satire and humor to make it a little easier for people to confront some of the challenges facing our culture in a more direct and honest way than we collectively have been under the premise that the modern day revolution should seek to empower what's good in people by informing and inspiring them to engage more emphatically with the world around them instead of just sitting around and living life vicariously. Because for Flabby it all boils down to this. We can create a better world to live in and it is up to each and every one of us to do so. And by inspiring others to seek what is best inside them and dig deep to create a profound sense of self that is informed and considerate without any thought of reward other than to reflect upon a life well lived. None of Flabby's pursuits pay more that it costs him to reach his dream. Thus far the massive hours required to keep all this going in the right direction have been so demanding that they have brought him quite literally to the edge of survival, but sometimes extraordinary times call for immense sacrifice. But Flabby sees his path of self sacrifice as an obligation to help turn things around as our culture deteriorates into a paradigm of less depth and inspiration. Simply put, he views committing one's life towards the preservation of our endangered humanity is nothing short of a labor of love.

Book preview

The Avant Guardian - Volume One:

Strange You Can Believe In

By

Flabby Hoffman

Published By Gro-A-Fro Productions, Inc

At Smashwords

Copyright 2013 Flabby Hoffman

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

DISCLAIMERS: The Avant Guardian contains material that is of an adult nature both in language and subject matter which might be offensive to younger and more sensitive readers. Parental discretion is advised and those who can't dig it can bite me.

Any actual names or references to persons, celebrities or products in the material written for and presented in The Avant Guardian are used in an editorial, satirical and/or parodist manner and reflect the opinions of the writer. Immense effort was made to present as little supposition and inaccuracy as possible, but owing to the scope of the piece, the nature of the subject matter and the controversy surrounding a number of the subjects…it should not be presumed that everything you read here is the only version of the truth. It is simply, in the author's opinion, the best version of the truth.

WARNING: This book has been infused with a series of both overt and surreptitious product placements, marketing gimmicks, advertisements and chemical defoliants all of which are designed to infiltrate your cerebral defenses, reprogram you and implant our message deep within your cortex to stop thinking for yourself, questioning authority and mainstream media and sublimate your every need into shopping and crass consumerism (as well as give you an overall sense of dehumanization and help you down the path of feeling like the world is a rotten place where nothing of integrity can flourish). Should you begin to get nauseous, anxious or for that matter, feel anything at all, it is recommended that you seek immediate medical attention for clinical advice and high doses of prescription level anti-depressants until you are numb and deadened on the inside. Additionally this book may cause some readers to produce an erection lasting more than four hours. Those that do should also urgently seek medical attention or possibly a half and half from the local area streetwalker.

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WARNING NUMBER TWO: Reading this book may lead to a critical reformation of your guiding ethos, your comprehension of the world and your place in it. Should you get a knock on the door during the middle of the night from a group of heavily armed, jack booted thugs with an American flag pin stuck on their lapels and a Twisted Sister pledge pin stuck up their asses…that is normal. Do not panic. Instead go directly to the silverware drawer, pull out a paring knife and give yourself a kitchen lobotomy. They will still find you with this book in your possession, which will immediately make you a person of interest (or worse), however once they realize you have permanent brain damage and do not have the cranial capacity to rationalize or even keep yourself from inadvertently suffocating inside of a dry cleaning plastic bag, you will placed into a witless relocation program and, like all the other brain dead wonders whom they have themselves already virtually lobotomized, be given a plush job at a sports marketing firm and a happening condo in yuppieville where you can blend in.

CHAPTER 16 - THE INTRODUCTION

The goal of this book is to instigate a series of global protests in the form of boycotts and collective action with the ultimate goal of freeing us from our diabolical corporate overlords. But first this message from one of our fine sponsors:

SPONSORED ANNOUNCEMENT:

It’s the movie that taught all of America how to dream again. NIGHT OF THE LIVING BRAIN DEAD is the tale of the usurping of culture and power in the U.S. by fiendish clowns who manipulate half wit zombies to guide all of the country into a thought revoking, devolving horror show of violence, ignorance and widespread cannibalizing of human brains. Starring George W. Bush and Sarah Palin as the head zombies in charge Lembeck and Brunhilda; En Ron Hubbard as Max Beavershot; O'Shea Guevara as Man Balloon; George Foreman as Foreman George; Clorox Bleachman as Freddie The Human Skid Mark; Ruth Bader Ginsberg as a six foot long party sub; Ra The Egyptian Sun God as a bottle of Hai Karate after shave; Theolonius Skunk as Short Circuit robot Johnny 5; the cadaver of Burgess Meredith as Speck The Wonder Yutz ; every Chicago Cubs fan on earth as Napoleon Dynamite; a large baked potato as Ben Affleck, Rudolph Nureyev as Mikhail Baryshnikov; Mary Tyler Moron as Pippa Middleton's left ass cheek; Vlad the Impaler as Don Pardo and Richard Nixon as Lee Harvey Oswald. For it is written that when everyone is brain dead, it will leave space for all mankind to suck it without ever having the cranial capacity to know what they are sucking. And then the one true entity, the few, the proud, the aristocracy will be able to rule without the need to create the false delusion of public consent and the bothersome, annoying distraction of dissent nipping at their nips. Run immediately to your nearest clone manufacturing center, aka the multiplex, and pay for your indoctrination today. I said run dammit!

The first goal of any worthwhile protest is to take back the media out of the control of the ruling elite. They wouldn't know what to do with an honest cultural mechanism if one snuck up on them from behind, chloroformed them, tied them up and then took a dump on their chest. They are just using the media to confuse, distract and program you to do fowl and nasty things (like eating at Olive Garden). Problem is, trusting the ruling elite to control anything in society is like telling an abused pit bull with a combination of rabies and advanced untreated doggie syphilis to baby sit a helpless recently aborted 3rd trimester fetus slathered in Alpo. Controlling the means by which people are informed and inspired is the primary goal of the real agent of change. Basically you start by angling for a more decentralized ownership of the media empire with various elements of it controlled directly by the public (and don't give me this NPR and PBS hooey…those outlets have more corporate sponsors than a race car and a Mike Myers movie combined). Each and every media oriented company must be individually owned.

There are so many other fronts on which this struggle must be fought, however freeing the process by which information gets disseminated as well as turning off the giant propaganda/social engineering device that is used to indoctrinate Americans into the obedient zombies that they are is job one. Once that is done you can start in on campaign fundraising reform, jobs, health care, bringing competition back into the marketplace as a whole and all the rest.

Tell me that having a free and decentralized media that isn't simply a mouthpiece for the aristocracy doesn't give you a raging boner….cause I know it does. I can see it from here.

You've got to face it…your society has been compromised and the main way they do it is through manipulating us through media. They took the social engineering goals of the Nazi's and created a system to privatize propaganda. So now no one can accuse the government of being fascist when the main indoctrination device instilling the crowd control is not actually part of the bureaucracy. It’s a new twist on an old favorite. Same results though. A manipulated public at large too dulled down and mentally incapacitated to grasp what's really going on let alone do anything about it. The government and the elite of the private sector act in consort with each other to basically sterilize our minds and our spirits and pave the way for the eternal global police state that makes Stalin, Hitler, even Orwell's 1984 all look like The Mickey Mouse Club.

Eventually a global union of people joined together, not for labor specifically but to ensure the overall rights and prosperity of the common man, will need to be formed to protect the world and its people in the face of the consolidated threat against all of humanity posed by the new Globalization of the aristocracy and their lap dog governments who act to crush us all in utter submission to their desires.

But before we get to deconstructing all of the world's problems and all that heavyweight garbage…how about a spirited and jocular tale about sex with underage barnyard animals.

EDITORS NOTE: In an effort to keep from grossing out those with diminished capacity for graphic descriptions of hard core deviant interspecies kanoodling so early in this tome, the jocular tale about sex with underage barnyard animals has been cut and pasted randomly to a point later in the book. While this does nothing to diminish the really disturbing nature of the outlandish perversions described in this segment, it does offer the reader an opportunity to immerse themselves in a certain amount of the insightful and eloquent life lessons, observations and quirky asides which this literary masterpiece is literally lousy with rather than hitting everyone with things like baboon analingus, giraffe deep throat blow jobs and giving a panda bear a brazilian bikini wax right off the bat. Call it a slow baby steps process into total abnormality if you must. Perhaps it's even part of the design of the book to have an internal slow developing metaphor that helps establish the point in the readers mind as they slowly find themselves becoming immured to the more sassy embellishments herein being emblematic of how the aristocracy uses media on society as a whole to turn it into a giant cesspool of humanoid robots. That's up to you to decide.

JOKE TIME:

Q: Why is the government like a diaper?

A: Cause they're all over your ass and they're full of crap.

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CHAPTER 3 - LEARNING IS BAD

Living in the U.S.A. (or U. F'in A. as it should be called) one is confronted with many obstacles. The main one is tied up in our inability to communicate. Information and education, rigidly controlled by an increasingly small amount of sinister demons out to turn you and yours into a spineless, ignorant lunk headed victims whose whole lives are guided by an inescapable anger and surface mindedness. Don't let the first amendment fool you, because that section of the Constitution was used by Richard Nixon to wipe his ass in August of 1950 one time on taco night when he ran out of toilet paper and hasn't been used since. Sure people kinda remember it was once part of the Constitution, but nowadays it's more like the Chupacabra or something. Some people think it exists, but they are mostly off their nut on some never ending mescal bender. Those that actually try to use the dramatically limited version of free speech that we are presumed to have in this country will either be drowned out through the over-amplified drone of the mainstream media blowing its pulsating propagandizing vuvuzelas directly into our cortexes, or they will get blacklisted, ridiculed, threatened and marginalized like The Dixie Chicks (also known as getting Chicksie Dicked).

Oh, the country will bend over backwards to make sure that Second Amendment and the right to bare murder weapons is unsoiled and pristine, so they'll let you pretend that you're protecting your body. But everything inside your brain…well basically you can go F that in the A. By the way, so long as we have to endure this right to bear arms thing dontcha think we oughta have a Constitutionally protected right to bare breasts as well?

Are you feeling me people? Do you have the courage to find out why this is being done? Of course you don't. That's why I've interspersed this text with tons of low brow toilet humor and graphic depictions of incestual sexual exploits to keep you titillated and drag you by the gonads into the world of quasi-enlightenment.

TOP 11 LISTS: Top 11 Modern Day Plagues

11. The destruction of the education system in America

10. The destruction of the middle class in America

9. The Suburbs

8. MTV, Madonna, Britney Spears, Taylor Swift…collectively assessed as Pre-Pubescent Cultural Deconstruction Elements aka The Bubble Gum Revolution

7. The Food Pyramid

6. Tobacco Companies

5. The Clintons

4. Madison Avenue

3. Corporate media and corporate media consolidation (Clear Channel/Fox/etc.)

2. Ryan Seacrest

1. The Bush Family (and associates)

[AUTHOR'S NOTE: Ah, but the axiom was always backwards...what you don't know WILL hurt you. The corporate overlords fed us this intentionally to help defeat our natural curiosity. It's just like the initial food pyramid, telling us it was healthy to stuff our face with tons of carbs everyday. Sure feels comforting, but look at us all now…wallowing in our own fetid corpulence. The damage is done. Cleverly sneaking in excuses to turn off to the realities of the world around you is a stable of the American cultural palette.]

POP QUIZ:

Who killed JFK? a. RFK b. Frosty The Snowman c. David Crosby d. Richard Nixon (for the answer, see CHAPTER 37)

CHAPTER 37 - WHO KILLED JFK?

During this chapter I will reveal the true killer behind the JFK Assassination (Richard Nixon). I will also reveal that this very same person was responsible for at least 83 other assassinations/career destructions of major political and cultural leaders in an American version of Mao's Cultural Revolution. Additionally, the premise shall be established that Nixon was in fact no different than any garden variety Hitler circa 1933, killing and destroying enemies, sending millions of innocent Cambodians, Laotians, Vietnamese, Chileans, Guatemalans, Peruvians and Americans to their deaths and ultimately acting as a fifth column operative to destroy the United States from the inside. I will also reveal the recipe for the special sauce on a Big Mac. But first a word from our sponsors:

SPONSORED ANNOUNCEMENT:

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WE NOW RETURN YOU TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED DEPROGRAMMING…

Yes, Richard Nixon was the only person who could have pulled off the sequence of events and cover ups in the JFK assassination, including the entire Warren Commission hoax, due to his connections from having been Eisenhower's Vice President and having been so much in the thick of so many covert ops in the early Cold War. Richard Nixon and his acolytes destroyed everything that was good about the United States plain and simple and led the world onto the brink of a dark age far beyond anything ever imagined. But more on that later. I mean pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeease! The frickin guy was in Dallas the morning of the JFK assassination for crying out loud. How could a washed up nobody (Nixon had in 1962 lost the California Governor's election, declared himself out of politics and moved to New York to join a law firm) be in Dallas the day that JFK was assassinated, be the number one beneficiary of the assassination (ultimately gained Presidency) and not draw any suspicion???? He was even at Love Field when JFK arrived…surveying his prey and yet nobody in mainstream media has publically ever stepped up and connected those dots. Not once…not even Oliver Stone.

That in and of itself should prove the point that mainstream media is nothing more than a proxy for the ruling elite. I mean seriously…who benefitted the most from the assassination? Nixon. Who had the clout to organize the Warren Commission so that nearly everyone on the panel hated JFK? Nixon. Who could organize the mysterious deaths of over 70 material witnesses to the assassination without anyone from the government investigating, Who had the FBI and CIA in his back pocket due to the many skeletons in the closet (primarily…speaking of in the closet J. Edgar Hoover) to force the entire apparatus of the state into a cover up? Nixon. What's the secret to success in making money in real estate. Nixon, Nixon, Nixon (or wait….was that "location, location, location?).

Nobody back then could even possibly consider that the U.S. government was capable of doing anything bad. The context was so different. Before Vietnam and JFK, the U.S. was a veritable Mother Teresa of a country. We saved the world in WWI and WWII, led it out of the Depression and in stark comparison with Stalin's Soviet Union seemed like the greatest thing since sliced cheese. It was only 15 years after the defeat of Hitler and Tojo. Had a crime like that happened today, post-Vietnam, post-Watergate, post-Iran Contra, post-Iraq War the U.S. government would be a prime suspect. There are tons of people who now believe that the only rational explanation behind 9/11 is that the Bush Cabal/U.S. was behind it all. That never would have been the case in 1963. It was inconceivable.

That's part of the demented brilliance of Nixon. He knew he could get away with it so much that he went ahead and showed up at Love Field that day to get a look at Camelot before he brought it down…he went ahead and ran for President even though it established a motive. He even killed off RFK when he thought he might lose the 1968 election to him. It's so damn obvious that one wonders where the heck the press has been this whole time.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Here is the breakdown of the causes of death of the 78 material witnesses who died within several years of the JFK assassination (frequently of really weird causes like one guy died from a karate chop to the throat while he was getting out of the shower…his murderer was never indicted): Murder- 37%; Accidental Death- 23%; Suicide- 17%; Natural Causes-22%. Now here is the national average of causes of death at the same time these exterminations were carried out: Murder-less than 1%; Accidental Death-9%; Suicide-1%; Natural Causes-89%. See anything that sticks out there? Check it out. Within three years after the murders of JFK and Oswald, 18 material witnesses died: 6 by gunfire, 3 in motor accidents, 2 by suicide, 1 from a cut throat, that poor schmuck who got it from the karate chop to the neck, 3 from heart attacks and 2 from natural causes (and one of those natural causes was Jack Ruby, Oswald's supposed killer, from cancer). The London Sunday Times famously concluded that the odds against these witnesses being dead by February 1967, were one hundred thousand trillion to one..which just so happens to be the same odds of the Chicago Cubs winning a World Series in the next 100 years. How about that!

Anyway more on Nixon, much more on him in fact in a little bit. I am starting to foam at the tip here. There is only so much that can be said at one time about that traitorous mass murderer without wanting to rip your own balls off in exasperation. In fact I could use a good joke right about now.

JOKE TIME:

Q: What's the difference between a Republican and a cat?

A: One is finicky and doesn't care if you live or die…the other one is a pet.

POP QUIZ:

What did Nixon do following his disastrous loss in the 1962 California Gubernatorial campaign? a. Fondled his wife Pat's balls b. Fondled LBJ's balls c. Went ahead and organized the assassination of the person (JFK) that had brought all this humiliation down upon him and subsequent to that engineer his own political comeback d. Fondled Nelson Rockefeller's balls (the answer is stuck up your ass…why not stick your head up there a little deeper)

CHAPTER 42 - THE MEANING OF LIFE, THE UNIVERSE AND EVERYTHING

Why do we allow our government to be the soul organization to carry out investigations of crimes which they themselves are likely to have been complicit in? It shows the same level of reasoning one would expect from someone suffering from a combination of insanity, denial and chronic post nasal drip. How does something like this sound: Hey Al Capone, we'd like you to investigate yourself and come up with evidence of your evading taxes. When you're done, write a report on the findings and we'll go along with whatever you say happened. Oh by the way here is an unlimited budget to manufacture any supporting evidence" you need to support whatever theory you come up with and a task force of black ops foot soldiers to help you manipulate the crime scene and influence/intimidate/other the witness pool. Oh yes, and while we're at it, here's a coupon redeemable for unlimited complicit media coverage and editorial content which can be used to prevent any dissenting voice from reaching the airwaves and/or to create distracting stories to push you off the headlines until you are damn good and ready.

The Warren Commission, the 9/11 Commission, The Iran/Contra Hearings were all conducted by the government and none of them resulted in any objectively rational or legitimate answers leading one to believe that all of these quasi-show trials had the combined level of judicial effectiveness of something along the lines of The People's Court. The explanations we were left with at the end of the investigations were in fact so utterly implausible that no one but Terry Schiavo (and other drooling brain dead vegetables like Heidi Montag, Paris Hilton and Laura Bush) would ever accept it as the objective truth. Here's a little test to prove this assertion. Below is a series of (magic) bullet points containing both some of the actual findings of these investigations interspersed with a series of wildly exaggerated b.s. Can you figure out which ones are true and which ones are bull dink?

MAGIC BULLET POINTS OF B.S. GOVERNMENT INVESTIGATIONS

(see if you can tell the truth from the horse hockey)

1. The Warren Commission:

There was no gunman at all. JFK was in reality a closet baldy and his cheap Costa Rican hair piece combined with Consort Hair Spray to form volatile chemical mini-explosions, blowing his head off and injuring Connolly in the process. Another version of this theory postulates that JFK was trying to do his famous dolphin imitation including the blow hole in the back of his head and just took it too far.

Jackie Kennedy organized the assassination when she found out that JFK was secretly boning Nikita Khrushchev.

Oswald delivered shots with pinpoint accuracy in a time frame that none of the expert marksmen who recreated the scene were able to pull off. Of his three shots in fact, it would have been the final one that blew Kennedy's head off and therefore his accuracy got better while he was rapidly cocking and shooting the bolt action rifle. He did not have an automatic weapon.

The size of the exit wound in JFK's neck was exactly the same circumference as soon to be famous quarterback Joe Namath's left nut.

The magic bullet passed through 15 layers of clothing, went through Kennedy's neck, Connolly's chest and arm, shattered multiple bones including JFK's vertebrae Connolly's wrist and rib, changed direction in mid air and ultimately landed in nearly pristine condition on the gurney that transported Connolly to the hospital even though metal bullet fragments were found inside Connolly. The bullet that blew Kennedy's head off however went through much less dense bone and flesh and yet completely shattered on impact.

The magic bullet has also been theorized to have bruised, but not fatally deflowered Governor Connolly's precious anal cherry. That honor was reserved specifically for Prescott Bush, father of George Sr. and the ultimate power broker whose plan it was to destroy the Kennedy family in the most brutal way possible.

The metal shrapnel stuck in Connolly did not match that of the magic bullet, nor did it match any of the metal from a can of Coors Light…also known as the Silver Bullet.

As part of a publicity stunt and in an effort to bring a little levity to what was the darkest and most destructive single act in the history of our planet, Taco Bell announced the Magic Bullet Taco on their 99 Cent Value Menu as a product tie in marketing plan in conjunction with first public showing of the Zapruder film. Made from a delicious combination of lettuce, tomato, sour cream, cheese and white rhino meat pressed and formed into cylinders of flesh shaped into a replica of the 6.5 millimeter bullet that was alleged to have taken JFK's life. McDonalds had previously come out with a JFK Magic Bullet Happy Meal in Texas and various other locations within the bible belt which featured dog meat McNuggets along with a choice of three different

JFK Action Figures: Spatter Action Refillable Shape Shifting Party Skull JFK With Detachable Brain Fragments And Leaking Trachea Hole, Kung Fu Grip JFK With Bubble Top Convertible Stretch Limo (that automatically slows in areas of high crossfire) or JFK Autopsy Play Set (complete with legal forms, pencils and erasers). Does this mean that Big Fast Food was in on the conspiracy? Only a hideous crab monster from outer space wouldn't not refuse to deny it.

Two officers on motorcycles directly behind JFK's limo in the motorcade are both shown in the Zapruder film looking directly towards the grassy knoll as the shots begin firing. It is almost like the two of them are synchronized. There had to have been something significant in that area for them to both get distracted like that at the very same nano-second. And if there were shots being fired elsewhere at the time, the noise that distracted them had to be something as significant as loud as shots being fired…and we're not talking about Joey Heatherton suddenly jumping up and belting out a tune from her album Feelin' Husky now…we're talkin about something like gun shots two police officers heard at the same time coming from the grassy knoll.

The head wound in JFK's skull was the exact size volume that it would be taken up by the equivalent of seven ounces of raw/uncooked human embryos. Tests conducted by the Warren Oates Commission (a similar body to the Warren Commission except headed up by veteran character actor Warren Oates, who we all know and love as the irrepressible Sgt. Hulka from the movie Stripes) revealed an exact match in volume to seven times the combined of the average ejaculate of famous author Jack London combined with that of former poet laureate Robert Frost.

EDITORS NOTE: Other members of the Warren Oates Commission included William Holden, Earnest Borgnine, Ben Johnson, Jaime Sanchez, Edmund O'Brien, Bo Hopkins and for a brief time Robert Ryan and Bob Tench, the vocalist from the Jeff Beck Group. That's right it’s the frickin Wild Bunch bitches and you're their judas goat! (FYI, this outfit would later tour North America and the Outer Hebrides under the band name The Vanilla Fudge Punch when they lost the rights to the name The Wild Bunch in a legal dispute with Florence Henderson).

While the connection between these things and the Kennedy Assassination has never been established by conspiracy theorists, government patsies or the famous sleuth Inspector Gadget, even the most party line conformists feel like the London/Frost/Ejaculate/Happy Meal Theory of the Warren Oates Commission is more plausible than the absurd lone gunman theory of the Warren Commission. And what's more is that both London and Frost were suspiciously at Love Field that day in Dallas as the President arrived and were of course immortalized in the famous rotogravure print of London making out with Tony Randall behind the One Riot, One Ranger statue on the morning of the assassination while Frost gave him a blowie just in back and to the left of where Nixon stood.

Seeing as Nixon was the main organizer of the coup de tat, this would seem to implicate the literary giants as both being involved in some way even though Frost had already been dead for a number of months prior to Kennedy's shooting and London had of course been dead since 1916

EDITORS NOTE: Love Field at the time of the assassination was home to the world's first airport based moving walkway. The title of world's first airport based moving walkway was later sold to the USFL's flagship club, The New Jersey Generals for a million dollars and a conditional pick in the 1983 college draft. The trade was considered a head scratcher to industry insiders who to this day complain that The New Jersey Generals never owned nor operated as an airport and the stadium at which they played, The Meadowlands, actually had no moving walkways. The draft pick that Love Field received in the trade was used to draft defensive back Roosevelt Straughter who never played a down for them.

The Insane Clown Posse were seen lurking within the vicinity of the Book Depository building on the day of the shooting mumbling indiscriminate threats about rubbing out JFK as well as pounding out some rough early versions of their classic tunes Ghetto Freak Show, Riddle Box, Piggy Pie and I Stab People (the frequently bootlegged versions of the all mumbled 11/22/63 recordings are now available on their box set entitled French Kissing Your Bullet Wounds with Portuguese versions available on an EP entitled It's Braining Men?)

In the years following the release of the Warren Commission report, after the Oswald acted alone theory had become the default presumption of a misguided public at large, Gerald Ford wrote in his book that the CIA destroyed or kept from investigators critical secrets connected to the assassination (that last bit is true..

LBJ being from Texas was not only one of the primary organizers of the shooting, and top insider for the coup and the cover up, but also bought each of the gunmen a Rolex after the fact with the inscription I Must Break You which presages the famous line from Ivan Drago in Rocky IV by more than 20 years.

All of the gunmen, members of the Warren Commission, Nixon, J. Edgar Hoover and Chairman Mao held a party at The Bohemian Grove on the night of the assassination where they all feasted on clumps of Kennedy's brain which had been delicately folded into the batter of an exquisite carrot cake (and then they all screwed like jack rabbits with J. Edgar Hoover serving as the pivot girl).

2. Iran/Contra Commission

George Bush Sr. gave pardons/immunity to crucial witnesses Cap Weinberger, Elliott Abrams, Robert McFarlane and others at the last possible minute (in the cases of Cap, Abrams and McFarlane less than a week before they were set to testify) which tore the heart out of special prosecutor Walsh's case to tie in the Executive Branch, namely Reagan and Bush Sr. to having been ultimately responsible for planning and approving all of the initiatives. None of them would ever be made to testify.

Ollie North gave blow job after blow job to Senator Daniel Inouye until his sentence was overturned and replaced with a slap on the wrist type minor 5th amendment technicality.

Numerous blow jobs and handies were given to various members of Congress in an effort to overturn the mild sentence issued to Admiral Poindexter for conspiracy, obstruction of justice, perjury, defrauding the government and the alteration and destruction of evidence. Eventually Congress complied and gave him immunity (more on ol' Poindexter shortly).

Special Iran/Contra prostitute…I mean prosecutor Lawrence Walsh as well members of The Tower Commission were all allowed to have aggressive sex with Ronald Reagan's ginormous turkey neck which reportedly they all vigorously pounded with great fury and abandon. Reagan would later say in his memoirs that they raped his neck so hard that it felt Frazier and Ali were fighting The Thrilla in Manila under his chin. Ironically the same drugs they dosed Ali with to cripple his mind were the same drugs they started Reagan on in 1987 to make sure he would never be physically able to implicate Bush Sr.

Key witness, William Casey, who was CIA director during Iran/Contra and thought to be a central figure in the conspiracy was found to have a brain tumor and died one day after the hearings began. Ironically, fragments off the same radioactive material that was used to give Casey his brain tumor were used to give Teddy Kennedy his terminal brain tumor at the tail end of the Bush Jr. regime to finish wiping the Kennedy brothers off the face of the planet. This left the Bush family a distinctive perfect record of having killed off all four of Joseph Kennedy's sons (as well as JFK's masculine child) for which they were recently awarded an entry in the Guinness Book Of World Record in the category of Kennedy's Murdered, Discredited And Defiled By A Single Family Or Cabal.

The widespread use of blow jobs, anal beads and salad tossing were done in an effort to limit the efforts of special prosecutor Lawrence Walsh from broadening the case to include the main organizer and designed of the program, former CIA chief George Bush Sr.

Admiral Poindexter, a central figure in the destruction of evidence during the cover up who had been pardoned in return for his testimony was later made the first head of the most intrusive, privacy invading offices ever created on planet Earth, the dreaded Information Awareness Office following 9/11. No one with half a brain can figure out why a criminal and traitor to the United States like Poindexter would be put in charge of such a powerful and sensitive office at a time when warrantless eavesdropping on all Americans regardless of their presumed innocence was enacted. Fortunately for the Fourth Reich, most Americans have much less than half a brain. (that's right…I said Fourth Reich. Get used to it frauline!)

Money to buy arms to sell to Iranians was raised by dealing drugs in America as organized by Pablo Escobar, Manuel Noriega and others. Those arms were given to Israel who brokered the sale to the Iranians as part of a plan to take American hostages and hold them until after the Presidential elections in 1980 ensuring that Carter would be seen as too weak to continue as President. These actions were taken in an effort to subjugate the American people under the actions of a secret totalitarian government as well as seek out revenge against those who had betrayed Nixon. This would enable the war mongers and profiteers to rise back into power only four years after those same people had been revealed during Watergate to have systematically treated the Constitution like a dirty dish rag, violated human and privacy rights, killed thousands by illegally overthrowing countries and bombing civilians in sovereign nations without a declaration of war and destroyed dissent in America through covert action under COINTELPRO (Setting up a system which continues to this day…can anyone say Afghani War to obtain full access to poppie fields? I knew you could.)

EDITORS NOTE: Prior to 1980, the United States had slowly been on a path to finally see the promise of this nation realized. Following 1980, Nixon's bloodthirsty psychopathic acolytes returned to power (bringing with them all the creepy intolerant, racist, hateful religious zealots whom they pretended to be aligned with as a means of reclaiming the mantle) and thrust the United States back into a psychology not seen since the pre-Civil War days with a widespread near celebration of ignorance and devotion to a self aggrandized, hate mongering approach to leadership mixed with a pseudo-religious pomposity. They put the U.S. onto a course of self destruction in the name of wanton militarism, petro-dollars and an overall contempt for humanity while creating an frighteningly unenlightened environment where people demand increasingly simple answers to exponentially more complex problems. All this while becoming less empowered intellectually and emotionally and intolerant of people that attempt to act pragmatically and systematically to rationalize a way to fight against the injustice of it all.

The counter culture has long since been compromised. Deep thoughts or questioning authority are frowned upon and downright squeezed completely out of our culture by the complicit media apparatus. Anyone that doesn't believe the version of Jesus as defined by some inbred hic is a godless abomination and selling out is the only game in town. It is pure indoctrination….Fourth Reich style. See there it is again. This Fourth Reich thing must be catching on.

Iraq was responsible for the Iran/Contra Affair as well as the horrific Cola Wars of the 1970's and the Late Night TV Talk Show Host Wars between Letterman and NBC for control of the Tonight Show in the 1980's and those are the real reasons we had to attack them in 2003.

The Iranian Hostages were released 20 minutes after Ronald Reagan's inauguration as President in 1981.

Right now…right this very minute, thousands of people throughout the world are getting blow jobs.

3. The 9/11 Commission

Initially at the start of the investigation, Bush Jr. had attempted to name Henry Kissinger as the head of the 9/11 Commission, but since most countries in the world think of him as a war criminal and a murderer (Pinochet, bombing of Laos and Cambodia, etc.) , they were forced to back off. Smooth move. Why not just name Pope Bend-a-dick (aka Pope Bad Touch Nazi Brown Shirt Pedophile Enabler) or some other blood thirsty abusive human vampire to the post. After all, the conclusion of the 9/11 Commission was already written before they had even met for their first informal coffee klatch.

Bush Cabal pitches idea to Hollywood TV exes for game show called Show Trial. On the show, friends and close conspirators of the previous Bush covert ops going all the way back to the Kennedy assassination are awarded points based on the amount of white elephants they rubber stamp and force feed down the throats of the flatlined American public at large. In the pilot episode, the 9/11 Commission comes up with a doozy claiming World Trade Center Tower 7 collapsed on its own without sustaining any severe damage during the attacks in a manner mimicking a controlled demolition. Some yahoo from the sticks buzzes in and guesses that the collapse was "due to structural damage caused by an infestation of super destructive termites which had been bitten by radioactive spiders…Peter Parker style, giving them the destructive power equivalent of weaponized thermite. 5 points are then awarded to the player and the emcee goes on to elaborate that these rare bugs had perished in the destruction of the Trade Center along with all the rest of the forensic evidence of the bombing and are now extinct, but they had coincidentally been eating away at the foundation of Tower 7 for months and the collapse had nothing to do with weaponized thermite being detonated in the building.

The Air Force presumably never got a single plane in the air during the hijackings and attacks. Smooth move. Even Baby Snookums could have seen that the reason no one was sent up to protect us was because we were the attackers. Great to know that the country is utterly incapable of protecting itself. Then again, a lot of people feel like FDR let the Japanese attack us at Pearl Harbor to force America into WWII. Some people think that the initial plan The Bush Cabal came up with to replace the Cold War with the perpetual War On Terra was much simpler than what they actually did on 9/11.

They said that Plan A was to simply blame the Iraqis and Afghanis for producing the movie Glitter starring the always obnoxious, brainless karaoke/Branson reject Mariah Carey. Once people saw it, they would get so pissed off and nauseous that they would gladly support the devilish Bush Regime's efforts to attack the movie execs of evil (aka the Taliban, Al Qaeda and Saddam) who green lighted the picture. Problem was, not enough people saw the film to stir enough public sentiment to authorize war. Those that did see it were interviewed and one of the exit poll questions was Would you like to see American ground troops be sent overseas to fight an invisible enemy in hostile lands for all eternity in an effort to get back at the producers of the movie Glitter (and possibly for the movie Crossroads starring Britney Spears)? While the respondents clearly believed that foisting such a horrendous, torturous and vile pile of celluloid garbage was clearly a war crime, they also claimed to not have time to answer the poll because they had to watch the finals of America's Got Talent which they cared about a whole lot more.

More than a dozen random people who had nothing to do with anything wound up with their panties in a bunch over some stupid thing.

The Commission's purpose was to waste people's time and resources in the pursuit of creating a lot of unreadable hooey and palaver along with writing an involved fairy tale version of what happened…the goal being to support the efforts of the Bush Cabal to turn the U.S. into a police state.

Lots of 9/11 Commission members, just like had been the case on the Warren Commission, were people that had huge conflicts of interest that had no business investigating a crime that the Bush Cabal might have had something to do with. There is no way this group of people would implicate officials within the government for either failing to protect the country or flat out laying down on the job to let the attacks happen let alone actually investigate to see if the whole thing was an inside job.

1. Thomas Kean, head of the 9/11 Commission served as a paid consultant and spokesman for the mini-series The Path To 9/11 which ABC aired without commercials during two nights on prime time. The show was widely and vehemently criticized for being a highly partisan, ideologically conservative, anti-Liberal propaganda piece. Hardly the type of independent thinker you'd want being the main point person on an investigation.

2. Lee Hamilton, co-chair on 9/11 commission who played pivotal role as a Congressional point person in Iran/Contra when he chose not to investigate the role that Reagan and Bush had played in the entire thing stating that it would not be good for the country to put the public through another impeachment trial. So while the executive branch in Iran/Contra probably organized and covered up drug sales, arms trading to the Iranians, violating laws and running a secret illegal war which led to thousands of people dying; it was Lee Hamilton who provided the clean getaway. Here he does it again with the 9/11 Commission allowing the Bush Cabal to get away clean after they are the most likely people to have pulled it off.

3. Fred Fielding, Nixon legal counsel between 1970 and 1972 and later legal counsel to Reagan which meant that he defended the Watergate and Iran/Contra titular figureheads. Following his stellar work ensuring the cover up on 9/11 commission, he was named White House Counsel for Bush Jr. and had been close personal friends with and an advisor to Dick Cheney for decades.

4. Jaime Gorelick was accused of having created a wall as Deputy Attorney General in the 90's which prohibited the collection and sharing of information on terrorists. The so called Gorelick Wall presumably barred anti-terror investigators from accessing the computer of Zacarias Moussaoui, the 20th hijacker, already in custody on an immigration violation well in advance of September 11th. Had that laptop been examined it might have prevented 9/11 from happening.

5. John Lehman served as Secretary Of The Navy for Reagan and actually wrote in September of 2000 how the United States needed a catastrophic and catalyzing event - like a new Pearl Harbor.

6. The Ghost Of Mamie Eisenhower…c'mon the lady was named Mamie doesn't that make you at least the slightest bit suspicious?

Great Moments In War Time Leadership: Bush Jr.'s face on 9/11 when while down in the Florida classroom when they first told him we were under attack and he sat there doing nothing for like seven minutes or whatever scratching his balls. He was in a public place at a promoted event. We were under attack. The Secret Service never would have let the President just sit there like a lump if we were really at war. Too much of an easy target.

Major NORAD exercises were being conducted on 9/11 which transferred most of America's home jet fighter forces towards the western United States. This drill was planned in advance, but NORAD certainly would have kept it top secret. How did the terrorists know that this would give them the perfect window to strike? On the other hand, the coincidence is too profound to not cause anyone with an I.Q. higher than Mortimer Snerd that this was an inside job.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Alright we've now had references to both Baby Snookums and Mortimer Snerd in the last few pages…characters that were hot circa 1932. Time to get with the 90's already.

Laura Bush admitted in an NPR interview that George Sr. and his wife Babar spent the night at the White House on Sept. 10th 2001. This would put them in the White House on the morning of the attacks. Bush Jr. wasn't even in the White House…he was off reading books to kindergarteners in Florida. What better place for Bush Sr. to command the attack than the ultra encoded centralized information center in the White House Presidential bunker. And with the idiot Jr. out of the way, he had the run of the place.

Excerpt from Dr. Seuss' 9/11 book: The Grinch Who Stole Ramadan:

Well hello sir let's find a game to play

Don't let the law or the truth get in your way

We'll blow up some buildings all flipity flop

Once we start this war it'll never stop

Because we need the lands full of drugs and oil

We'll have to send troops to foreign soil

Permanent war is just so zimzambulous

And the police state we'll adopt would just be so fabulous

I do not like them with any freedom

I do not like them anything but dumb dee dumb dumb

I do not like them seeing the truth

I do not like them hating John Wilkes Booth

I do not like them stealing my money

I do not like them thinking or feeling life's good or funny

I do not want them to look in the mirror

I just want them to fight the war on terra

SPONSORED ANNOUNCEMENT: AMERICANS IDLE

It’s the newest, hottest and wettest reality show on TV…its Americans Idle. You, the viewer, can sit at home in the comfort of your torpid funk as you foment cottage cheese on your futon, in your isolation float tank or in the break room of your local bath house and enjoy hour upon hour of blissful and reassuringly innocuous pictures of real American families sitting around and doing nothing but watch their TV. It's almost like a behind the scenes look at what Ozzie and Harriett or Leave It To Beaver would have looked like sitting around and wasting their lives away if any of those actors would have been lobotomized, drugged up and programmed to be brain dead robotic couch potatoes embedded in a world of thoughtless indigent deprivation and emptiness.

You the viewing public at large can play a role in determining who the laziest Americans are while you drive your monthly text message limit through the roof to the benefit of your friendly neighborhood cellular provider (who has a sweetheart co-op deal with the show's profane producers) by texting in vote after vote for the most apathetic, disengaged and slothful family in America (that is besides your family). Funny how shows like this contribute more than anything to the dumbing down and soul crushing of America, but the Tea Party does nothing to protest it.

Where's your tea partiers when it comes to the polluting of our brains and the white washing of our souls. Nowhere, that's where. I'll tell you, the Tea Party movement is looking more and more like the Teat Party movement…a bunch of boobs.

Its Americans Idle - beware and be square! And immediately following American Idle on Fox its Ameriklan Idol…where you the unsuspecting closeted mega-racist ball sniffer chooses America's biggest racist from a group of Klansmen, Neo-Nazis, Tea Party Republicans, Media Executives NASCAR fans, former NFL cheerleaders, televangelists, motor city madmen, Charles Nelson Reilly impersonators, Corporate CEO's, The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Hollywood film execs, former Bush Regime cabinet members, The Council Of Trent, imperial storm troopers, The National Association of Realtors, Mormons, The Backstreet Boys Fan Club and runway models.

Magic Bullet Points Epilogue:

So how did you do on the Magic Bullet Points? Did you recognize the truth from the lies? No? Join the club. Most people see things that are in any way different from what is spoon fed to them by the system as scary or repugnant. Those people would read things like this and call me a fag or a pinko or a sheep shagger, even though I am simply just asking people to think about it, because they are trained to fear and hate what they don't know. See on our endless cultural shift towards the right, there are only a few people who bother to think independently at all.

Where it gets to be a problem is in our near total inability to see ourselves within the political spectrum. We've all been taught since birth that the farthest you can go on the left is pure communism, what they always seem to leave out is that the farther we go towards the right the closer we get to pure fascism on the opposite side of the spectrum.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Ironically, both the major communist governments we have seen in the world, namely China and the Soviet Union, have turned into totalitarian states. They might have professed on paper to be far left communists but in practice they were really right wing fascist governments with the central committee and secretary eliminating opposition political parties and the free press. Even more ironically was the establishment of property tax in the U.S. which meant that nothing was actually privately owned here in the supposed capitalist country. You stop paying your property taxes and the government would come grab your so called possessions….in the U.S. we only rent, we never really own…hence the U.S is actually a communist country where the state actually owns the means of production. knock knock who's there? the thought police the thought police who? the thought police it's time for you to go to room 101

Slowly we have been led towards the right to the extent that now we are on the threshold of a permanent Fourth Reich in America.

Jerk Wad Zealot Litmus Test/Diffuser - Tired of taking verbal abuse from one of life's many loud mouthed indoctrinated brain dead egomaniacs? Fed up with having them push you around with their belligerent spewing of the indoctrinated gospel of how perfect and infallible their myopic and delusional viewpoints are? Well here's a little test you can hit them with that should discombobulate their irrational ranting lunacy and distract them long enough for you to kick them in the balls and get a word in edgewise about how you're tired of being treated like a brain dead idiot.

Every time you see a faux religious zealot (like Michelle Bachmann or Wayne LaPierre) cop an attitude that the lefties are godless, compare Obama to Hitler, pretend that they really give a damn about the life of the unborn child, take the moral high ground or simply selling snake oil you can now bust their chops with this easy one question litmus test of their faith. They have learned that if they pander to the feeble minded and tell them what they want to hear that it is the fastest means of achieving power in this country. It's like when the evangelists make God in their own image, to suit their own power hungry ambitions. They actually take the manipulated image of God and use that to mutate the great unwashed into obedient sniveling gas bags. They make it as simple as possible, because you just can't handle the truth. You need them on that wall. Are you trying to seduce me Mrs. Robinson, Luke I am your sister's cousin twice removed and you had me at hello.

But I digress…here is the simple trick to get them to really debate the heart of the issue which is the true root of faith. Most of them are either on auto pilot or using faith as a tool to improve their own self worth. They never think or reason their way through their belief system, but blindly accept as much as possible. This way they can fill their minds with a manufactured certainty which pushes all questions/fears out of their thought process. The ultimate delusional behavior. Any shred of truth or divinity is usually lost in the translation because the conveyance has become more of a hate/fear based medium. After all, there is no glory in defining what we cannot know due to some expediency. That's placing our own desires before everything else.

So when they come for you, ask them the question What created God? and see if any of them can produce anything more than a wad of sputum. At some point there had to be the creation of God right? Are we really supposed to believe that there was a void and the first this that arose from this void was this omniscient, all seeing, all knowing being in the shape of Morgan Freeman? Any answer they give you besides I don't know is a lie. No religion or science has ever attempted to explain how God would come into being. Without that, you can't really accept or deny anything. You must accept that there is a truth we are not yet meant to know or are mpt yet capable of knowing. None of us can claim the one true religion without knowing the nature of the origin of God. Everything that seeks to define God, defines him in our own image…not in his. Perhaps we are simply not meant to know yet. So in the absence of an absolute, people turn to their Fast Food Drive Thru God Happy Meal and swill him down with a diet Coke and a side order of fries. And when you say, I want steak instead, they have an industrial sized freak out and call you a big nasty ball fondler.

POP QUIZ:

Which of the following disturbing sexual practices did I try for the first time last night with your momma? a. Congress Of The Cow b. The Soft Serve Ice Cream Cone c. The Angry Pirate d. The Chili Dog (for the answer to this an all subsequent Pop Quiz questions, please see the appendix at the end of the book…or read below, whatever…no big whoop.)

Answer: b. The Soft Serve Ice Cream Cone

EDITOR'S NOTE: Due to uncontrolled inflammation, the publishers of this book had to have its appendix removed. The book is fine and resting comfortably.

We now return you to our regularly scheduled point we were trying to make in this chapter. This point is being presented without further commercial interruption or gigantic topically unrelated tangents:

Anyhoo, during the Warren Commission era, the American public was conditioned to presume its government was incapable of corruption of that magnitude, but by 9/11, people by and large presumed that the government was the source of all corruption of that magnitude. So why do we still let the government investigate itself? We are left with gray areas, none of the evil doers are expunged and so we know that the government cannot be trusted. Ipso facto, we hate government, we choose to denigrate it and limit its power and therefore we have nothing left to protect us from the oligarchs which is government's main job.

The media is totally impotent in regards to being a watchdog of the public interest. So much so that not even someone with an 8th of the cranial capacity of a brain deformed fetal embryo of an alcoholic crack head Taco Bell marketing executive would think the media is anything less than an indoctrination device 100% geared towards administering the orders of the Fourth Reich. It’s a miracle and testament to how intensely insane that Nixon was that Watergate ever got exposed and Iran/Contra was exposed (only because Eugene Hassenfus' mule airplane delivering the goods crashed in Nicaragua where the Sandanista's press could not get silenced fast enough. The media has