My Wings

By Lacy Diaz

Independent small town girl, Meredith Chaney, is satisfied with her life. As satisfied as one could be when she loses her childhood sweetheart. Meredith thinks she's healing and moving forward until he comes home.

Matthew and Meredith have always come as a package, but when he takes her for granted one too many times, fate steps in and demonstrates how unpredictable and short life can be.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lacy Diaz
• Release date: Jun 27, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301545933

Lacy Diaz

I am married to a wonderful man I met in high school. We have three awesome, but drastically different children. I have taught writing, reading, and math to developmental students at the college level for years, and I taught writing and photography to children. I now run a human resource department.I received my Masters of Arts in communication from the University of Oklahoma-BOOMER SOONER!I currently reside in the panhandle of Texas and enjoy the wide open spaces.

Book preview

My Wings

By Lacy Diaz

*****

Published by Lacy Diaz

Smashwords Edition

My Wings

Copyright 2013 Lacy Diaz

Thank you for purchasing My Wings. This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be resold or given away to other people. This book is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons, places, things, and events are solely coincidental. The characters are productions of the author’s imagination.

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My Wings is dedicated to my Mamaw, who taught me a lot about being strong, independent, and speaking my mind. You mean the world to me, and I love you very much.

*****

To my beta reader who has given me perspective and her valuable time to make my books better. You are much appreciated. I am so glad I have you to edit my tired, kid interrupted, end of the day writing.

Chapter 1 Haunted Dreams

I couldn’t sleep…a regular occurrence these days. I tossed in my twin size bed across from my sister. She was sound asleep in her own bed snoring loudly. A thunderstorm was blowing through, and the trees were banging against the roof. The rain was pounding the ground outside with enough intensity that the moisture might penetrate the rock hard ground. We needed the moisture badly, so I could handle the lack of sleep. The room was muggy though, and I wanted to open the window. I tossed over facing the wall this time imagining sheep jumping a picket fence over and over. I finally drifted off to a restless, dream-filled sleep.

"Hey Mere, Matthew said as I walked into his room. The dream was vivid as if I was literally reliving the memory. He was lying on his bed listening to his neon blue IPod. I wasn’t typically allowed in his room, but his mother had called me in as reinforcements. Only I could get Matthew to do certain things. We were seniors, and no one was able to force Matthew to do anything he didn’t want to do. Did my mama call you?"

"Yep, why you dragging your feet?" I asked pushing his legs over to lie beside him.

"I don’t know, thought I might stay here for school," he said fidgeting with his headphones.

"Why the hell would you stay here? I asked sarcastically. We’ve talked about this. We’re solid Matthew."

He leaned his head on my shoulder as I smoothed my cheerleading skirt out. I had just come from a basketball game.

"None of the schools I like are close, he reminded, We’ll be far apart."

"So, it’s me, I said, You are thinking of staying here and throwing your full ride away for me."

"Us," he corrected kissing my shoulder as he leaned his head back against it.

"That is so stupid, don’t be stupid Matthew, I lectured reaching out to hold his hand, You are going to need that full ride and college football career to fund my lifestyle I plan on you giving me."

"Leave it to you to joke, he smiled slightly as he sat up. I’m not going to be able to concentrate with you hundreds of miles away."

"You can’t concentrate when I’m within mounting distance, I teased quietly; Hundreds of miles away is exactly what you need. Anyways, you know I’ll wait for you, come see you. You have nothing to worry about; we’ve always been you and me, and we always will be. Unless some filthy rich college guy sweeps me off my feet, and then you’ll be getting a wedding invitation."

"Yeah, I guess, he agreed holding my hand tightly. As long as you cheat on him with me, we’ll be okay."

"Of course, I’ll sneak out when he’s away on business trips," I laughed.

"So, let me see the options, I instructed changing the tone of our exchange reaching for the acceptance letters and contracts off his dresser. Texas Tech, Oklahoma State, Nebraska, Arkansas, and Texas A&M, which one you like the most?"

"I didn’t like Tech or Nebraska, he admitted taking their letters out of the stack. A&M is good, but they have a sophomore quarterback. I probably wouldn’t start for two or three years."

"So that leaves OSU and Arkansas," I said holding their letters up in the air.

"Stillwater is closer, he said, But their team isn’t as good."

"So you go with the Hogs, I clarified pulling his face to mine. Guess I’m an Arkansas fan."

"You could always go with me, he suggested. Who’s going to tutor me, if you aren’t there?"

"All the more reason for me not to be there, I argued playfully, So you can focus on football and school work."

"Can I focus on you for now?" he whispered as I smiled.

"Yeah, because you are taking me on a date tonight," I informed him as I stood up kissing his forehead.

"I spent all my money traveling to see you compete," he said leaning his head on the wall behind him.

"No worries, I thought we could drive over to the lake, I confided, Free date tonight."

"I love you Matthew; I’ll see you in a few hours."

"Love you too Mere," he said as he put his headphones back in turning his music up.

"He chose Arkansas, I said as I passed his mama trying to get to my truck as quickly as possible. See you later Mrs. Thompson.

"Take care Meredith and congratulations on state," she said as I left. I cried the entire way home. I didn’t want him to leave, but I knew he couldn’t stay. I loved him, so I sent him away.

I woke up as the windswept the hail against the windowpane. The ice sounded as if the glass was going to shatter. I hated dreaming about him. I wiped the tears from my face getting angry all over again.

Ugh, I can’t sleep with that damn storm, Mandy said as she sat up frustrated in her bed.

Aren’t you driving to Plainview tomorrow? I asked turning in my bed to face her. She ignored my obvious tears like always allowing me to save face.

Yeah, he should be coming home with me, she said lying back against her pillow. Hopefully.

So get some sleep sis, I said tossing her headphones at her. I finally gave up sleeping jumping in the shower before anyone else could wake up with the same idea.

Miranda left for Plainview by eight in the morning, so I decided to head over to the University to see Quentin. He was standing outside the dorms with Mark when I pulled up to the dormitory.

Hey there, sweet girl, Mark said as he wrapped his arm over my shoulders in a half hug. Don’t forget the bonfire tomorrow night at our house.

We won’t, I assured as he pulled away from me.

Oh, and you guys going to the fair tonight? he asked turning back around to face Quentin and me.

He had a look of concern mixed with a hidden agenda. Oh Mark, why do you attempt to hide anything from me? I will always find out in the end. Mark was my rock and my savior after Matthew. I didn’t have brothers, but Mark might as well be one. Our fathers were best friends their entire lives. His older brothers had dated Jasmine and Jessica, my older sisters, off and on for years. His mother had babysat us when my mother practiced in Amarillo. He was six months older than Mandy and I. He had crushed on her for years, but we had always been like sister and brother. He was protective and overbearing. He would tell me how to live and how I should or shouldn’t behave. We also knew each other’s darkest secrets, even secrets that Emily and Matthew didn’t know.

I have to supervise until at least six, Quentin said sliding his arms around my waist.

Yeah, and Mandy went to pick Nick up from Plainview, I added, So probably not.

Just wondering, he lied smiling the relief overwhelming his face.

Why? I demanded playfully.

No reason Mere, he said jogging to his truck to get away from my questions. He was so weak never could handle my interrogations.

That was weird, Quentin admitted as he pulled me into the dormitory.

Yeah, a little, I agreed plopping down on the leather sofa in the common area. We were alone with the exception of the girl working the desk in the corner. She had her ear phones in with the music turned up. Quentin sat down next to me forcing the sofa cushion down, and my body to lean into his.

Too bad I’m working right now, he whispered as he moved my hair away from my face. You could thank me for staying this summer.

Oh, you need to be thanked, I teased pressing my mouth against his tasting the sweet fruity flavor of his tongue as it grazed over mine. I lost myself in the kiss experiencing every sensation to the fullest as my phone blared interrupting us like an alarm clock set in the middle of the night. The song startled both of us as we pulled apart. I pressed decline as I started to lean back into Quentin hoping he would overlook the interruption.

Why do you always ignore that person? he asked. He normally disregarded my rejection, only occasionally mentioning that I could answer if I wanted.

Because this particular person is no longer in my life, I answered vaguely.

I don’t think he got the status update, Quentin joked.

How do you know it’s a guy? I asked slyly.

Because it’s a love song, not even a new one, he said sounding slightly jealous. Quentin was amazing at not asking too many questions. He never overstepped his bounds. The dude calls all the freaking time, and you never answer it.

We use to be inseparable, I confessed as I forcefully pulled his face back to mine; Now we’re not.

Lucky me, he said in between kisses.

I kissed him for several more minutes focusing on curing his jealousy before students started filtering down the elevator and stairs.

I gotta go, but I’ll see you tonight, I assured kissing him one last time before leaving. I was a private person and having an audience wasn’t my thing. Quentin was different then what I was accustomed. He wasn’t possessive or territorial. He allowed me to have my space that I needed after a lifelong relationship like Matthew. He healed me.

I wasn’t going to go to the fair again, but my sisters dragged me. Our town didn’t have a bustling nightlife, so the fair temporarily created excitement. I convinced Quentin to meet me there when he got off work, so I wouldn’t be stuck tagging along with my sisters and their friends.

Meredith, over here, over here! Hurry up! Jocelyn yelled as she made exaggerated arm movements. I ran over to the hammer ride they were climbing onto and quickly jumped into the seat next to her.

My sisters Jasmine, Jessica, Jocelyn, and I didn’t typically hang out together. Miranda hadn’t gotten back from Plainview yet. We lived in a small town in Texas of about ten thousand people, but it was a college town. The population greatly decreased during the summer.

I was one of the babies of the family; the other baby was my twin sister Miranda. We were identical, but Miranda constantly tried to change her appearance. She and Jocelyn were wild and free spirited. They didn’t care what people thought and nothing stopped them from getting what they wanted. Jasmine, my oldest sister was a platinum blonde, tall, slender, model type. She never had any difficulty attracting guys, and had an outgoing, confident, inner beauty to match her exterior. Jessica was slightly shorter with a strawberry tint to her hair. She was sweet as well, polite, and perfectly mannered. However, Jessica had a charisma that the rest of us lacked. Jocelyn was the firecracker of us. She had a hot temper with honey blonde hair and bright green eyes. She was the most opinionated and demanding of us all. Miranda and I were different. Aside from being twins, we were naturally brunettes with hazel eyes. We were also significantly shorter than our sisters were. We were born ten weeks premature causing our petite stature and ensuring we were spoiled. Miranda had dyed her hair bright red and she had colored contacts that changed her eyes to a vividly unnatural blue. Our personalities remained identical to an extent; I was grounded and she was a free spirit flying everywhere. We were independent, confident, and stubborn like our sisters, but we were also the babies. We were adored and fearless.

I want something to eat, so let’s give the rides a break for now, Jessica suggested grabbing her money out of her back pocket. We were meeting several people up here, but none of them had arrived yet. Jasmine and Jessica were five years older than Miranda and me, so we often didn’t hang out with the same people.

Mere, sweetheart, what do you want? Jasmine asked as she stepped up to the window to order.

Corn dog, I said hanging back with Jocelyn. Jasmine paid for all of our food as Jessica handed me a corn dog and a lemonade.

Here, you need something to drink too, Jessica said.

You didn’t get yourself something to drink, I argued.

I’ll survive, she said taking a bite of her cheese stick.

Jocelyn was only a year older and was a part of Miranda and my group of friends.

Where’s Quentin? I thought he was meeting you here like an hour ago, Jocelyn questioned wrapping her arm around my neck as we walked between the food vendors.

He texted, said he was running late, I replied wrapping my arm around her waist. Where’s your guy?

I haven’t found him yet, she laughed. We all got corn dogs and cheese sticks found a table and sat down. Jasmine and Jessica’s friends found us, and quickly overwhelmed the small picnic table. They threw half their cheese sticks away and headed towards the midway leaving Jocelyn and I alone at the table.

So have you talked to Matthew? she asked curiously picking at her food. None of my sisters still spoke to Matthew. They had always adored Matthew, but naturally, they took my side in the end.

Nope, not since that night, I answered peeling the breading off my corn dog, Or well the third night.

He’s back in town. Do you plan on talking to him? she asked a look of concern on her face still simply picking at her food.

When’d he get back? I questioned not bothering to answer her. Butterflies filled my stomach. I missed him, but was insanely angry and hurt. I hadn’t even been able to break up with him officially. Mark had to do it for me. Mark was over protective, so he didn’t mind handling my dirty laundry. I think he might actually prefer to handle my dirty laundry.

Last night…Johnny told me this morning when we went running, she answered. Johnny was her best friend who’d had a crush on her since she was two years old. She never let him past the friend stage though. All of us assumed he would eventually wear her down, but she was still holding strong. All of the guys in our town respected Johnny leaving Jocelyn alone, which infuriated her. However, she never ditched him.

You know he’ll be at Emily and Mark’s party tomorrow night, so you better talk to him for his sake and Quentin’s, she warned. Quentin should not have to deal with Matthew, and I’m pretty sure Matt’s going to freak when he realizes you’ve moved on.

Matthew won’t cause a scene, I disagreed as Quentin walked up behind me saving me from any more questions. He was only half a foot taller than I was with curly dark brown hair, but he kept it cut short. His eyes were a caramel color, and his skin was tanned as if he’d been working in the sun all day.

Hey Mere, sorry I got hung up at the dorm, he said kissing me on the cheek sweetly. He was a resident advisor, so he stayed at the dorms during the summer, too.

We’d been dating since Valentine’s Day. I was heartbroken over Matthew, and he gave me a silk pink daisy with a note that read, ‘You’re like the classifieds in my newspaper keeping all my attention; I have to find you every day:)". The gesture was so cheesy that I couldn’t help but laugh.

Over the next month, we dated regularly becoming exclusive around spring break prompting him to give me another note that read ‘You’re my headline’. Quentin was a journalism major serving as the Editor of both the school newspaper and school annual as well as a resident advisor. He was incredibly patient and understanding.

We were still in the puppy love stage of our relationship. Both of us were on our best behavior still trying to present the best side of ourselves. I hadn’t opened up to him about Matthew, but he was friends with Mark, so he was aware of a little bit of my past.

Damn, it’s hot for nine o’clock at night, he said pulling at his t-shirt. Summer in Texas was warm and muggy. Quentin was from South Dakota. He was as versed in country living as we were, but wasn’t as accustom to the heat. He helped my daddy a few times on the ranch, but Daddy always compared him to Matthew, so I