Two Weeks to Live

By Michael Kay

Narrative non-fiction about the spiritual lessons learned through the author's experience of watching mother die with Brain an Lung Cancer. The book comprises ten observations of biblical stories of sickness, how the characters dealt with those circumstances, and what we can learn today from these stories. The ten "Lessons" include narrative dialogue from the author's struggle with death, miracles, faith and belief systems.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Michael Kay
• Release date: Jul 25, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301850525

Book preview

Two Weeks to Live

By Michael Kay

Copyright 2013 Michael Kay

Smashwords Twelfth Edition

Smashwords Twelfth Edition, License Notes

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Table of Contents

Prologue

Chapter One, Lazarus

Chapter Two, The Blind Man and Jairus’s Daughter

Chapter Three, Naaman and Gehazi

Chapter Four, Job

Chapter Five, Hannah

Chapter Six, The Kings Asa and Hezekiah

Chapter Seven, Paul and Timothy

Chapter Eight, Elijah

Chapter Nine, The Blind Man at the Gate Beautiful

Chapter Ten, Jesus

Epilogue

Prologue

Two or three weeks, without treatment. Mom was diagnosed with cancer in late November 2005. A week before, during Thanksgiving, I remember mom saying that something just isn’t right, as she was looking for the sugar. That became the understatement of the year.

Two weeks is not much time. Without a solution, I turned to the only place I could: my faith. Dusty and unused, I began to exercise the spiritual muscle that none of us use much until we have problems we can’t solve. Looking for Jesus is a difficult undertaking. Like searching for a lost toy in your child’s bedroom; it is possible to find, but is it probable? It is hard to find someone who is invisible. When your mom has told you that without help she will be dead in two weeks, however, that lost toy becomes the only toy that matters. I wanted my invisible savior.

I am of the opinion that something is either a whole truth, or a whole lie; and something that contains mostly truth is the worst kind of lie. Equipped with a faith in a Jewish Carpenter; I began searching. A miracle is what I wanted from God, because the book I read tells me that they are real. If I believe in this man then I must believe in all of him. Those who approach theology as nothing more than an academic exercise are, to me, very sad. Why sing songs about something you don't believe?

So, I went after Jesus like the woman in Luke Chapter 8. Where is He? At least the woman knew what town Jesus was in. I don’t even know what dimension to look in. I am told He is everywhere. Everywhere doesn’t seem to be very close to me much of the time.

As I pressed through the crowd, lessons were learned. The discovery is recorded here. She was alive when I started putting these thoughts down. She passed away while I was still trying to find her cure. The findings, however, led me to believe that someone, somewhere, may benefit from my search for healing, hope, and faith. These are the notes of the journey.

While looking for a miracle, I ended up recovering faith in the Word of God. The answers received were not the ones I was looking for. But, they were answers. How should we approach sickness in our lives? There are a variety of approaches depending on the background of the seeker. The literature in Christian thought is broad when it comes to miracles and sickness. I found basically two types of Christian sickness/miracle literature out there. On one side is a barrage of amazing stories, half of which you believe are true. On the other side, you have the more academic view, which it too pessimistic to be worth believing.

The Bible doesn't teach a fixed procedure when it comes to miracles and sickness. Jesus never healed the same way, so why should our approach to illness be identical for every person. There is an element of endurance involved as well. God isn’t going to be our escape artist every time something bad happens. God may be willing to drown Pharaoh and his army, but He seems just as willing to let you sit in a small hut while the death angel walks past your door. Seek the miracle, but be willing to walk through the fire. God may show up while you are in there. Personally, I was looking for Pharaoh’s army to be drowned.

When your faith is tested, much of the denominational doctrine you’re taught goes out the window. In truth, the test qualifies the faith as being genuine. Otherwise, it is more imagination than faith. Imagination birthed out of the experiences others have had, not your own. Singing hymns you didn’t write on Sunday morning always seems to have an element of emptiness; you haven’t been moved to express your adoration in that way. The connection that legitimizes your praise must come from something real. The man who wrote How great thou art, probably meant it because he had an experience that changed his view. So, I began to seek for my own experience: an experience that would grant my declarations of Jesus to be authentic. That is probably what we want the end of our faith to be anyway -- an experience that changed us. The blind man who stood before the Pharisees didn’t know much, but he knew he could see. (John 9:25) By seeking the counsel of others, praying, fasting, and reading the word, I wanted to bring a change wherever I could -- whether it be my mother, family or myself.

It is not popular in this day for Christians to receive the doctrine of miraculous change, but it is central to our Faith. For Paul, a definition of being saved was change. (Galatians 6:15) Should we not also receive change for our mortal bodies as well as our souls?

For me, the argument of miracles is simple enough; if God is unchanging then what was available to the early church is available to us. Our mom deserved a miracle, and I pursued it as best as I was able. Interestingly enough, I found that the more I talked to others about it, the more I realized that Christians themselves don’t really think this power is for them. I understand why. There is a fear of failure in the pursuit. The resistance to believe in miracles comes from insecurity in our own faith. It is easier to say that God does not perform such signs anymore than to question our relationship to Him. If nothing changes when we pray, then how do we know our prayer for salvation is being heard? We choose to not expect God for difficult things. We would rather rationalize His inactivity to protect ourselves from disappointment. We don’t want to test our doubt.

Is it better to live as a pessimist and get surprised by joy every now and then, or as an optimist and be disappointed from time to time? I believe the proper place for a Believer to live is in the second attitude. Adam inherited a world of thorns. We can either proclaim the obstacle’s glory, or God’s. Because I personally haven’t seen anyone raised from the dead doesn’t mean it can’t happen in this day and age. It is easier to pray for peace, and accept reality. But if something great is available, don’t we owe it to ourselves to look for it? A life without buried treasure is dull and empty. I’d rather believe in the treasure and never find it than to declare the things I see to be the only reality. Very dry life in my opinion.

Back to the cancer -- it had already metastasized and spread from her lung into her brain when she was diagnosed. 24 brain tumors. I remember the look of despair on mom’s face when the doctor told her. My spirit was crushed. We knew from the beginning that a miracle was all that would save her. The medical team may prolong the inevitable, but it was either a miracle or the grave at the end of the line. I prayed very hard for mom, and I wondered why I never prayed that hard for her before.

I remember watching her very carefully when Christmas came that year. My family spent the day at my sister’s house. It was a strange day for me. It was as if I wanted to experience every potential missed Christmas with her by being extra focused on the details of the day. My interest in everything centered around mom’s cancer, which is an awkward way to approach Christmas.

My story is about family and faith, and what I was, and am willing to learn about God through experience. It is my desire to help others who want their faith to contribute to the healing of those they love. These pages represent my search through the Bible for answers.

You search the scriptures because you believe they give you eternal life. But the Scriptures point to me. John 5:39

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Chapter One

Lazarus

Weeping with those who weep, is a testament of your Christ-like character, which is love. (1 John 4:8) I have learned that the feeling of emptiness I experienced when mom was diagnosed, and the subsequent hole I carried around inside, was not doubt. I didn’t want to feel bad, because I didn’t want to doubt God. The denial response, to me, was a form of faith. This sounds ridiculous now, but it didn’t then.

What I was actually experiencing was love being demonstrated through pain. Faith is not denial of reality, but the acknowledgement of a higher power. What the ten spies saw in the giants was true; they were formidable. They were stronger than the Hebrews. The unbelief didn’t come from the declaration of the giants being great. The unbelief, rather, came from the failure to acknowledge that God was greater. (Numbers 14:9) That was the faith of Joshua and Caleb. Sure, the giants are big, but our God is bigger. Sometimes we are afraid to accept our situation because we do not want to limit God with our doubt in Him…which if we all admit… is there.

We hurt because we love. The connection to others inevitably opens the door to both intimacy, and injury. They increase together. You can test this theory by smacking your thumb with a hammer. Involuntarily, the soul withdraws the injured hand to a place of safety, comfort, and intimacy. If the thumb failed to cry out to the nervous system, then all of us would be walking around with less than ten fingers. Likewise, if someone takes a swing at your nose, your arms instinctively sacrifice themselves to protect your face. Your arms love