SPHDZ Book #3!

By Jon Scieszka and Shane Prigmore

The SPHDZ are about to reach their recruitment quota—and that’s when the real story STARTS!

Michael K. and the gang only have 100 SPHDZ left to sign up. But something is about to go horribly wrong that will change EVERYTHING forever. 

What if the 3.14 million and one brainwaves aren’t for saving the world at all? What if Agent Umber finally catches up with the SPHDZ? What if the AAA Chief has a new plan? What if Fluffy can speak...baby? New twists and new turns await readers. And in the end, Michael K. may not know whom he can trust anymore.... The third book in the out-of-this-world series is full of twists and turns—and a bigger mystery is about to be revealed! 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers
• Release date: Sep 20, 2011
• ISBN: 9781442412965

Jon Scieszka

Jon Scieszka is the National Ambassador for Children's Literature emeritus and the bestselling author of more than twenty-five books for kids, including The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales, Math Curse, Robot Zot!, and the Time Warp Trio series. Jon founded Guys Read to encourage a passion for reading among young boys, with the philosophy that boys love to read most when they are reading things they love. A former elementary school teacher, Jon lives in Brooklyn with his family. For more great books, more great facts, and more about your favorite authors, head over to www.guysread.com. You'll be glad you did.

Book preview

title

To you, you, and especially you.

Thanks for joining the Spaceheadz Brainwave.

We could not have done it without you.

—J. S.

To Madison, Mackenzie, and Noah, the craziest SPHDZ nieces and SPHDZ nephew on the planet

—S. P.

Two small elves stood in line behind the red ropes outside Dunker’s Donuts on Fifth Avenue in Brooklyn.

This was not as completely crazy as it might sound, because there was also a sign in the Dunker’s Donuts window that read:

The two elves stood in line with the rest of the moms and dads and babies and kids waiting to tell Santa what they really wanted. The two elves wore those green elf outfits you’ve seen in cartoons and movies and cookie commercials.

But the strange thing about these two elves was that one of them wore soccer cleats and the other one wore a SpongeBob SquarePants backpack . . . that was carrying another tiny, hamster-size elf.

What are you going to ask Santa to bring you, Chelsea? the mom in front of the elves asked her daughter.

A pony, said Chelsea, kicking her little brother.

Oooooh, said the SpongeBob-backpack elf. More flavor! I’m going to add a pony to our list.

We are already asking Santa for one hundred more SPHDZ, said soccer-cleats elf. Can he also fit two ponies in his flying-sled delivery system?

Eeek squeak squeak eeek, said hamster elf. Squeee week wee eek.

Great whole-grain jingle bells! said soccer-cleats elf. This Santa Claus is super-size and great taste!

Eee eee eee eeek? asked hamster elf.

Yes, said backpack elf. That is a most extra-crunchy idea. I will send a visual image of us to Michael K. and Venus.

Ho, ho, ho, said the suspiciously skinny-looking Santa in the Holidayz HoHoHoles Korner of the Dunker’s Donuts. I don’t think Santa will be able to get you a real F-18 Hornet fighter jet.

The little boy in Santa’s lap punched Santa in his red velvet stomach and pulled Santa’s white beard down under his chin. You are a stupid Santa.

The backpack elf held a camera out at arm’s length.

Squeeek, said the hamster elf.

The elves twisted their faces into something like smiles.

The hamster elf nodded.

The camera took a picture.

Come on, Jackson, said the little boy’s mom. We will go talk to Santa’s manager about this.

The dad took Jackson’s hand and glared at Santa. I can’t believe I had to buy a dozen Holidayz HoHoHoles for this. All you had to do was say ‘Okay.’

I could look into procurement of the F-18, said Santa, replacing his beard and fixing his stomach. But I am pretty sure it is not in line with federal procedure to release these fighter jets to citizens.

The dad stared at Santa.

There would also be a lot of paperwork. But maybe the older model F-111 might be available?

Now both the mom and the dad were staring at Santa.

Santa realized he had almost forgotten to say the required Dunker’s Holiday Saying. He added, Ho, ho, ho. Dunker’s knows what dunkers love.

The mom and dad and punching kid stormed over to talk to the manager.

The line and the elves moved three steps closer to Santa.

Hamster elf sent off the picture and text.

Eeee eee, eee eee.

CLINICALLY PROVEN SAFE AND EFFECTIVE, added backpack elf. Michael K. and Venus are going to be sooooo surprised!

Michael K. and Venus sat at the table farthest away from the librarian.

Venus flipped open her sparkly and SPHDZ-stickered laptop and logged on to the library’s free wireless.

Check this out, whispered Venus.

Venus launched spaceheadz.com and quickly clicked

"Spaceheadz drawings from Magic BBQ Sauce in Seattle, Washington . . .

"Spaceheadz ads from Toll-Free Fusilli in Lebanon, Indiana . . .

"Spaceheadz music from All-Natural Oven Cleaner in Toronto, Ontario . . .

"Spaceheadz stories from Bold Taste Deodorant in London, England . . .

"Spaceheadz videos from Disposable Chicken Fingers in Barcelona, Spain . . .

We really did it, Michael K., whispered Venus. We really connected a whole Spaceheadz network.

Wow, said Michael K.

He had been so busy going to school, spreading the Spaceheadz word, and trying to keep Bob and Jennifer and Major Fluffy out of trouble . . . that he hadn’t stopped to look at the whole thing. It was pretty amazing.

And coolest of all . . . , whispered Venus. She clicked back to the Spaceheadz home page and zoomed in on the counter. We are almost at our three point one four million plus one Spaceheadz to save the world.

Michael K. read the Spaceheadz counter aloud, Three million one hundred thirty-nine thousand nine hundred and one Spaceheadz? WOO!

The librarian, at the other end of the room, gave Michael K. a stern look.

Michael K. ducked his head.

This is great. This is huge. I can’t believe we are going to do it, whispered Michael K. Only one hundred more Spaceheadz to go. This is amazing.

Michael K. stared at the spaceheadz.com counter. Then he had another thought.

But what if something goes wrong?

Venus clicked through more Spaceheadz drawings and Spaceheadz ads. You are such a downer sometimes. We haven’t seen the AAA in weeks. And Bob, Jennifer, and Major Fluffy have been almost normal. What could go wrong?

I don’t know, said Michael K. You know how weird stuff just seems to happen with Spaceheadz.

Venus ignored Michael K. She clicked happily through more Spaceheadz pages. " ‘SPHDZ DOES IT BETTER!’

‘I’M A SPHDZ / YOU’RE A SPHDZ/ Wouldn’t you like to be a SPHDZ TOO?’ ‘MAKE FRIENDS WITH SPHDZ, MAKE SPHDZ WITH FRIENDS!’ Spaceheadz kids are geniuses!

And check this out, said Venus. Our three point one four million plus one moment is going to be historic. I'm recording the final counter moments in the Spaceheadz admin section so we can have them forever.

Venus clicked on the tiny words SPHDZ ADMIN at the bottom right corner of the spaceheadz.com page, right next to TERMS

Reviews for SPHDZ Book #3!

[christopher.kyle1706 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I really enjoyed this book. I liked going into the world with Michael, Bob & Jennifer. Some of the plots were mixed up with other plots, and some plots were messed around with . Except for the plot mix-up and mess up I really enjoyed it. It had some mature & non-mature parts in the story. My favorite part was when Michael K. meet the SPHDZ, and they wanted him to become one! Cannot wait to read the next book!
Definitely a Good Read!

[jothebookgirl · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

May be good for a reluctant reader. The references to the commercial slogans are funny.

[hatease · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Michael K. is a 5th grader who just transferred to a new school and is having a hard time making new friends because they are all aliens! They then have a mission and a hamster as their leader.Coming of age for boys5-6

[sullywriter_1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Disappointing. I prefer the Time Warp Trio.

[asomers_8 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Everything that I didn't like about this story is why it will probably appeal to the most reluctant readers. The short choppy dialgue, the bizare situations, the ideas of aliens arriving in the form of pet hamsters.... all things my male reaers would enjoy.

[mopbroek07 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Stars: ThemeAge: IntermediateThis book is a good example of the Science Fiction genre because it involves aliens and advanced technology, such as that used for hunting aliens. However, the author still makes the story feel real by using an average fifth-grader, with understandable emotions and reactions, as the main character.

[whitreidtan · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Michael K. is the new boy in fifth grade. Being new is never fun but it's even worse when the other new kids in the class turn out to be aliens who have no concept of how to act like normal kids. They spout lines from old tv shows since Earth tv was beamed into their planet and is how they understand earthlings. Michael doesn't want to be associated with Bob and Jennifer or their commander, who is apparently the class hamster, but he cannot seem to escape them. For their part, they are innocently convinced that Michael K. is the help they need in order to save the Earth and keep it from being turned off. Silliness and outright goofiness abound here but there's not much explanation of the danger facing Earth that Michael K. so needs to help avert. The bumbling of Agent Umber (all the good color names were taken) is slightly reminiscent of Steve Martin's Inspector Clouseau with the chief difference that he does not, in the end, catch the aliens. Short and quick, this is the first in a projected series and seems almost to exist mainly to introduce the characters as there is little further explanation of the dire crisis facing our planet. There are ecological snippets scattered amongst the chapters, which perhaps give a clue to the ultimate crisis but it seems that further books in the series are needed for it to be stated explicitly.I'm passing this one along to the youngest son to see what his take on it is, given that he's within the target age range for it. I only wish my ARC had finished artwork so he could have the full experience. In any case, I suspect it will be welcome reading as he tries to read for a half hour a day for more than 50 days over the summer to earn an ice cream party when school starts next year.

[ronrose1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Fifth grade was never this bad, was it? First day in a new school and the two kids sitting next to Michael K. are either the weirdest kids ever or they are space aliens. (Well they must be from outer space because Dillard Picklebury from my fourth grade class was the weirdest kid ever. But I digress.) Bob and Jennifer let Michael know right away, that they are spaceheadz from another planet. Michael wishes he was on another planet or at least not assigned to sit next to these two loonies. Despite his best efforts, he is repeatedly drawn into their company. He eventually starts to see things from their perspective. He finds himself saving them not only from the dangers of the local crosswalk, but also from the ever vigilant, often incompetent, Agent Umber, of AAA, the Anti Alien Agency. This book is a lot fun. It is full of good humor and many references to current catch phrases and slogans from television that young readers will be familiar with. References throughout the book are given to current websites created for the book, that will enhance the reader's enjoyment. Great fun, with situations that will amuse middle schoolers.

[abbylibrarian_1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

What the... what? I was so excited about this book, but now I'm just... confused. Michael K, new kid in school, gets stuck sitting with two very weird also-new kids in his fifth grade class. They keep telling him they're aliens (Spaceheadz, actually) and that they have to get 3.14 million people to become SPHDZ or the Earth will be turned off. Their only knowledge of the Earth is from commercials and television, so that's their frame of reference. I can get on board with the wacky. That's not my thing, really, but I know some kids go gaga for it. My problem is that it feels like half a story. And I know that it's the first book in a series, but... nothing really happened. We met the characters. They had some hijinx. And then it ended. There's no real urgency, "turning the Earth off" is never explained. Kids may still read it - it's got a good cover and an interesting premise and maybe they'll laugh at all the toilet paper, pickle phones, and head injuries. But I'm still just saying "What the... what?"**Important to note is that I'm reviewing from an ARC without the final artwork. Maybe the art will help me understand it?**