Lifelines: Things Worth Holding On To
By Pen
()
About this ebook
A thermos that holds more than coffee. Quilting frames handmade by my Great Grandfather. A tree that refused to grow straight and tall. A daughter taking control of her own life. Doodling to stay alive. How a heart attack can change the way we see things.
These are the things which remind me that each person walks through this world with his or her own unique perspective: perspectives from which others could benefit. In this collection of poetry and essays lies my own unique perspective.
Pen
Pen is a disabled writer who refuses to be unproductive. Despite being unable to sit in a chair for 7 years due to Hidradenitis Suppurativa (HS), she utilizes her laptop to write from a prone position. She currently lives in the lovely state of Illinois with her three cats: Boots, Feisty and Skitter.
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Lifelines - Pen
Lifelines:
Things Worth Holding On To
Pen
©2014
Smashwords Edition
All rights reserved
©2000-2013 Pen
No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, physical or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author.
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ISBN: 9781310580062
For my beloved Clairee
I miss you more each day
For anyone who has had to hold on, even if for just one more day.
Table of Contents
In Daddy’s Shoes
The Age of 36
Learning Experience
My Mother’s Hands
Woman’s Journey
Venting
Survive
Silent Screams
Pirouette
Just Desserts
I Am Woman
I Never Sent You Flowers
The Woman Inside
In a Gutter
A Work of Art by Nature
Holding Memories
Dying to be a Writer? Well, Not Exactly
Lifelines
The Quilting Frames
I Cast My Stone
About the Author
From the Author
In Daddy’s Shoes
Are you up there? Can you see me? Are you watching over me?
My first memory of him is fear.
I was about four years old. I was playing with some wooden log cabin building blocks. As many four year olds are prone to do, I tried flushing one of the logs down the toilet.
I do not remember how long my father spent with his hand in that porcelain bowl, grunting, groaning and sweating, to get that little piece of wood out of the small space it was wedged in. When he finally retrieved it, he flung it up the hallway, causing it to bounce off the block walls and skid across the kitchen floor.
That’s how I learned not to flush my toys down the toilet.
It is also how I learned to fear the brusque, burlish man who was my father.
Look at me, Daddy! Watch! See what I can do, Daddy? I can ride a bike! And I did it all by myself. What do you mean, ‘it’s no big deal.’ I’ve been trying to learn for months. What do you mean ‘so what?’
I was not the daughter my father wanted. I was not petite, nor attractive by society’s standards. . .standards to which my father subscribed. I was neither a cute, nor precocious child. I was a quiet little loner; a thoughtful, introspective little girl who learned a great deal from observation. I was constantly aware of my father’s disappointment in me as well as his misery of his own life.
I took to reading like a fish to water and became an exemplary student. If my father could not have a beautiful daughter, maybe he could be proud of an intelligent one.
Daddy! Daddy! Look! I caught my first fish! All by myself! But