In My Father's Shadow

By JL Paul

RE-EDITED AND RE-RELEASED OCT. 2014
Having a best friend is great – especially when you’ve known this friend since birth. Sometimes it can be complicated when the best friends are of the opposite sex – but it works.
Until those weird little feelings begin creeping into the heart.
Cole and Ally have known each other forever – their dads are best friends and members of a popular rock band. Cole and Ally have grown up together, gone through school together, and have supported each other’s goals. Cole is working on a band. Ally is focused on her sports. Neither of them wants or needs romantic distractions.
But a sweet kiss on a warm summer day changes things.
Suddenly, everything is weird. Their friendship is strained and sexual tension hovers over them. What do they do – do they give it a shot or ignore it? And what happens if they do try and fail? Is their friendship over or can it be salvaged?
Now their lives are like a rollercoaster – one minute high and the next low. They struggle to deal with emerging feelings while hanging on tightly to their close friendship. And then there are Jamie and RJ, their other best friends, who are trying to deal with all the awkward tension.
Jealous ex-girlfriends, gossip, and family drama add to the mix making the difficult situation even harder.

• Language: English
• Publisher: JL Paul
• Release date: Aug 16, 2011
• ISBN: 9781466024847

JL Paul

I've been writing for years mostly as a hobby. I read constantly, although I'm pretty particular about what I read. I do not have a website for my work yet (yeah, I know, what is wrong with me, right?) but once I do, I'll post the link here.

Book preview

In My Father’s Shadow

by JL Paul

Copyright © 2011 JL Paul

Smashwords Edition

Reprint & Revised 2014

Copyright©2014

All rights reserved worldwide.

No part of this ebook may be copied or sold or distributed or posted to any website without prior written permission -- if you have this file (or a printout) and didn't pay for it, you are depriving the author and publisher of their rightful royalties.

All characters in this book are entirely imaginary and any resemblance to persons living or dead or actual events is purely coincidental.

Chapter One

Cole Crawford cursed as, both hands filled with luggage, the strap of another bag slipped off his shoulder. He dropped them all in a haphazard pile near the door to his dorm room and dug out the keycard from his back pocket. Sticking it in the slot, he opened the door, holding it so his roommate, and best friend, RJ Shaw could pass.

RJ dropped his bags and guitar case near a bed with a huge sigh while Cole stood, still holding the door open. Hey, how about a hand, huh?

Sorry, bro, RJ said as he rushed to help Cole heave his bags into the room.

Their room this year was larger and on the first floor. Being seniors had its perks.

Two beds were pushed against opposite walls, both with nightstands beside them. A large, flat screen TV hung on the wall, just left of the double closet. A mini fridge with a microwave atop sat between the two desks. And the bathroom was much bigger.

Cole dumped his stuff before falling on the bed he designated as his own.

Hey, have you heard from Jamie and Ally? Are they here yet? RJ asked, peeking into the bathroom. Dude, the john is huge.

Cole lifted a shoulder and closed his eyes, stifling a yawn. He hadn’t had the best night sleep and it was beginning to catch up to him. He’d had so much on his mind and more than just going away to boarding school for his senior year - especially with his dad acting kind of weird.

Not sure. I talked to Jamie last night and he said he hadn’t heard from Ally yet. He was waiting for her to get back from camp to see if she needed a ride.

She was at camp a long time, wasn’t she? RJ said as he sat in the desk chair, immediately swiveling it back and forth.

Yeah, well, the princess is serious about softball – you know that, Cole said, pinching the bridge of his nose and fighting a wave of fatigue.

Don’t let her hear you call her that – she packs a mean punch, RJ said with an affectionate grin. I missed her, man.

Yeah, I did, too, Cole admitted around a yawn.

I bet, RJ said as he bounced from the chair, an endless ball of energy, and landed on the edge of Cole’s bed. Poor little Cole, missed his bestest friend!

Bite me, man, Cole laughed, shoving RJ off his bed. He slid his own feet over the side and hoisted his body to an upright position. Let’s go to the Student Center and see if we can find James or Ally.

Okay and hey, maybe we can put up a notice on the Student Center board for a bassist, RJ suggested as he kicked a duffel bag out of his way.

Sure, Cole said, pulling on hoodie out one of his bags. He patted his pockets, looking for his keycard. But let’s give it a week or two first and see if we can find someone on our own. You know all the freaks that will be bugging us to audition.

Good point, RJ said as he yanked a knit cap over his curly hair. Pulling the door open, he gestured grandly for Cole to exit.

They crossed the grounds, both pulling sweatshirts over their heads as the early fall evening air nipped at them, hinting around that colder temperatures were on the way. Plenty of people crowded the walkways hauling luggage, shouting out to acquaintances, or hurrying between the buildings. Several greeted RJ and Cole but none of them were the two they were seeking. When they finally made it to the overcrowded Student Center, they paused near the door to survey the mob.

The Student Center was a huge, stand-alone one-story building with a vending area, full of machines with snacks and drinks – some on the healthy side and some not so much. An open area filled with tables and chairs provided a place for friends to meet, study, or have snacks.

Near the large windows in the back were several pool tables, foosball tables, video games, and a jukebox.

Hey, RJ said, bumping Cole. He nodded toward a line of vending machines as a mischievous smile slipped across his face.

Cole grinned as he spotted the sandy brown head of another of his best friends, Jamie Winston, leaning against a soft drink machine, chatting with a pretty blonde. Cole grabbed RJ’s arm and towed him quietly toward Jamie, pressing a finger to his lips when the girl noticed him.

Didn’t take him long, did it? Cole complained good-naturedly.

Give it up, jock, she’ll never give you the time of day, RJ said, startling Jamie.

Jamie turned, his hazel eyes wide, his handsome face frozen in a smile, and offered a fist to RJ and Cole. Hey, what’s up?

When did you get here? Cole demanded.

About an hour ago. I had to help Ally get her stuff to her room. Jamie said, rolling his eyes as a smile lingered on his lips. She packed enough crap for ten girls, I think.

She is a princess, Cole muttered, drawing a chuckle from his friends.

Are you going to the bonfire? RJ asked, eyeing the snack selections in the vending machine, his hand absently rubbing his stomach.

Yeah, Jamie, the blonde said, tugging on his sleeve. A seductive smile slipped across her glossed lips. Are you?

He turned back to the girl and chucked her chin. I’ll be down there.

Blushing, she scurried away to a group of girls huddling at a nearby table.

Where’s Ally? RJ asked as he shoved a dollar into the vending machine and selected a candy bar. I haven’t seen her in ages.

Scoffing, Jamie leaned against the soft drink machine, folding his arms across his chest. She was unpacking and catching up with Jeana – all that girly stuff.

Cole nodded, imagining Ally jabbering away to her other cousin, Jeana Andersen. Ally and Jeana didn’t have as close a cousinly relationship as Ally and Jamie. In fact, Ally oftentimes complained about Jeana and her attempts to sway Ally away from the boys she’d grown up with and turn her into a girly-girl.

She’ll be mad and irritated later, watch, Cole said with an amused smirk. I don’t know why the two room together.

Aunt Liz’s idea, Jamie said. Do you guys want to head down to the bonfire now?

Sure, RJ said, shoving the remains of his candy bar in his mouth. He crumpled the wrapper and shot it at a trash can as they headed out the door.

They chatted quietly, talking about the plans for Out of Control, Cole and RJ’s band, as they made their way to the football field. Jamie tossed out a few suggestions as to who could take Steve Runyin's place, their old bass player who’d graduated the previous year and gone off to college.

I don’t know, man, Cole said as he plopped on the bleachers and watched his classmates congregate around the roaring fire. I hate messing with auditions but if we want to get serious about this band, we need someone good – someone willing to work as hard as we do.

Amen, RJ concurred as he dug another candy bar out of his hoodie pocket. Too bad you’re such a jock, James.

Laughing, Jamie settled on the bleachers next to Cole. Hey, my dad taught me to play but I just suck at it. I guess Ally and I are the black sheep – no musical talent.

Cole snorted as his eyes searched the crowd, looking for signs of their missing friend – the final piece of their foursome. He spotted the cute blonde Jamie had been talking to and nudged his friend. There’s that chick, bro. Aren’t you supposed to hook up with her or something?

Jamie shrugged. I’ll talk to her later. RJ, where’s your brother?

I don’t know – he’s a big boy now and I don’t have to watch him anymore, RJ said. He released a low groan. Cole, watch out, man, Jennifer Mansfeld has got you in her sites.

I thought you broke up with her last year? Jamie said.

Yeah, Cole snorted, a smug smirk on his lips. But she just can’t resist my charm.

Like hell you’re charming, Cole Crawford, a voice said.

Cole snapped his head around and his smirk deepened as his eyes fell on a dark-haired beauty with glimmering ice blue eyes. Jealous?

Ha! she said crossing her arms firmly over her chest, fighting a smile. Of what?

Jeez, you two, RJ said as he pulled the girl into a warm embrace, lifting her off her feet. How are you, Ally? Softball camp okay?

She edged back to kiss RJ’s cheek and beam at him. It was great. How are you? And your family? You hardly emailed me at all, you know.

Yeah, well, he said, abashed. A touch of red painted his cheeks. You know I’m not good at the whole correspondence thing.

He was busy fighting off all the girls, Cole said, ripping off the knit cap to tousle RJ’s dark, curly hair. He snatched Ally’s hand and jerked her to his chest, wrapping his arms around her. His heart twittered as the scent of her strawberry shampoo reached his nose. How are you, Al?

Good, she whispered, melting into him.

Images of the incident that had happened the weekend before she’d left for camp flashed before his eyes but he pushed them away. He drew back to smile and study her face. Freckles dotted her nose and cheeks, brought on from the sun, no doubt, but her hair was still dark and her eyes still a stunning blue – both inherited from her father. Her mother had gifted her with a petite figure and soft features. She’d always been pretty but it seemed as if softball camp had filled her with a new sort of feminine confidence she hadn’t had before.

You look good, Al, he said, the corners of his lips turning up in a teasing smile.

Yeah, well, you’re still as ugly as ever, she said, her eyes dancing in amusement. How was your summer? Horrible because you were pining for your best friend?

Sure, princess, whatever. Tell yourself that if it helps you sleep at night, he said.

She extricated herself from his arms and smiled at her friends. So, what’s up tonight?

Cole shrugged as he resumed his position on the bleachers. I know of a party off campus.

I’m game, RJ said.

Yeah, me, too, Jamie added.

Jamie, Ally warned, her eyes blazing. If you get caught drinking they’ll kick you off the football team.

Jeez, Ally, Jamie said, blushing. I’m not stupid.

Yeah, princess, Cole chided, slapping Jamie playfully on the back. He’s not an idiot.

Seething with fury, she bent to glare into Cole’s face. Do not call me that.

He grinned and stood, towering over her. Sure, whatever. He turned to the guys. Are you ready? I’ll drive.

Ally snagged his sleeve, fisting the material of his sweatshirt. I’m going with you guys. Someone needs to babysit.

He wrenched his arm free. Fine, but we’re all grown here so you don’t need to nag, got it?

She narrowed her eyes, grinding her teeth. Got it.

His heart did the weird little flutter thing again as her unwavering gaze burned into his eyes. Let’s go, he said, intending to sound hard but sounding a little hoarse instead.

He drove them off campus and through the tiny town to a slightly isolated house with a large front yard full of cars. It was hard to make out the models and who the vehicles belonged to in the dark but Cole already had a basic idea as to who would be attending. As RJ and Jamie jumped out of the car, Cole grabbed Ally’s arm.

What? she demanded, startled by his actions.

There are a lot of older guys here, Al. Stick close to me, he said.

I can take care of myself, she said.

I know, he said with a hint of pride. But just the same, stay close, huh?

She opened and closed her mouth then nodded. Sure, but only because I need to keep an eye on you.

He released her with a laugh and got out of the car. He slowed his stride so she could keep up and chuckled inside at her need to look after herself and not depend on her overprotective male friends. But he already knew she was self-sufficient. She had to be, growing up the only girl in a group of boys. The band their fathers belonged to was sort of like an extended family – a close-knit group of friends who often gathered to celebrate birthdays, holidays or just their friendship. Although Ally and Jamie were the only ones related to each other, it oftentimes felt like they were all cousins or siblings. Until recently.

Cole once again shoved those forbidden thoughts from his head. Ally was his friend – his best friend – and he didn’t want to think of her any other way. He couldn’t. Not only would it possibly ruin their friendship but he just didn’t want the stress and strain of a relationship when he had a band he was trying to get up and running and off the ground. He did not want to depend on his father or his father’s friends to get them the fame and notoriety that he so badly craved. He wanted to do things the same way his father had – lots of hard work, sweat, and talent.

The party was in full swing by the time they walked through the doors. RJ and Jamie had already disappeared, probably in search of food and girls, though not in that order. Cole grabbed hold of Ally’s hand and pushed his way through the crowd, looking for Randy, the host of the party.

Loud, thumping rap music reverberated through the living room and they both winced as sweaty, grinding bodies impeded their progress. Cole managed to find a path and eventually made it to the massive kitchen.

Meat and cheese trays along with veggie trays were sprawled out on the table and counters, already picked over and wilting in the warm air. Three large tubs were on the floor, full of ice and many varieties of beer, soda, and water. Cole dug through them, producing two cans, handing a diet soda to Ally, keeping a beer for himself. He wrinkled his nose at the food and glanced around the kitchen, not recognizing any of the people. Maybe it was a mistake to come.

I don’t know anyone here, Cole, Ally said, sidling up to him, pressing against his arm. I thought maybe a few of them had gone to Woodsedge Academy last year or something but I don’t think so.

He draped a casual arm around her shoulders and placed his lips near her ear, smirking at her shudder. I’m sure the people here from Woodsedge Academy are ones you don’t recognize because they aren’t the type of people you would hang out with, princess.

She punched him weakly in the stomach and fought a smile. Great. What kind of party did you drag me to?

Hey, you’re the one who insisted on coming, he pointed out, sipping from his can. He sighed. We won’t stay long.

Where did Jamie and RJ run off? she asked, a touch of worry in her eyes.

They’re fine, you know that. They won’t get up to anything they shouldn’t.

I know, she said, wrapping an arm around his waist.

Cole! There you are! Randy Roman announced, his eyes a little bloodshot. He slapped Cole on the back and grinned at Ally, his eyes traveling up and down her body. And who is this?

Cole tugged Ally closer to his side. Ally Jones. He left it at that, hoping Randy would get the point and stop leering at her.

Do you want another beer? Randy asked.

Cole shook his head. Nah, man. We can’t stay long. Curfew and all that you know.

Sure, sure, Randy said. Well, help yourself to anything you want. I need to go mingle.

Thanks, Cole said, holding tight to Ally’s shoulders.

They stuck around, mingling with some of the guests but when two boys who’d had far too much to drink starting arguing, pushing, and shoving, Cole deemed it time to go.

Where are Jamie and RJ? Ally said, her concerned eyes sweeping the room.

We’ll find them, Cole said, latching onto her hand and leading her through a set of sliding glass doors. He winked at her when they heard RJ’s raucous laugh riding the light wind. Stepping off the deck, they located RJ and Jamie sitting on a picnic table, holding court with a group of slightly intoxicated girls.

Jamie looked up, slamming the rest of his beer, and then nudged RJ. Time to go, man.

Ladies, RJ said, slipping off the table and bowing low to the girls. It’s been a pleasure but our time here is done.

Come on, Cole growled, snagging RJ’s arm and pulling him away. Curfew, you know.

That night, as Cole lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling, he pondered the conflicting feelings swirling inside of him. He couldn’t lose control of them – he needed to keep them neatly filed away and locked up. He couldn’t allow them freedom. He had too much to worry about – too much work to do to engage in any sort of romantic relationship with the girl he considered his best friend. There was too much at stake.

But that night last summer swam in his mind, replaying with perfect clarity. The feel of her damp skin under his fingers, her soft lips pressed against his…

He flopped on his side and squeezed his eyes shut. He would concentrate only on school and his band - that was all.

Chapter Two

Cole was digging into his scrambled eggs while RJ and Jamie were engaged in an animated discussion when Ally dropped her tray on the table. Jumping, they gawked at her, equal looks of surprise on each face.

Morning, boys, she said as she slid into her customary seat next to Jamie. She lifted a fork and paused as they each continued to gape at her. What?

You sound awfully peppy for being a self proclaimed Monday hater, Cole said, smiling at her from across the table as he scooped up a forkful of eggs.

She stuck her tongue out at him while her heart performed a series of gymnastic moves. She sent a strong verbal warning to her heart, telling it to knock off the idiocy – it was only Cole. The first day of school doesn’t suck.

Just the second. And the third. And the fourth, RJ said. Cole, who was sitting next to him, bumped RJ’s shoulder with a laugh.

I won’t argue that, Ally said as she nibbled on her toast.

Look at this schedule, Ally, Alec, Ally’s younger brother, complained as he slid his tray on the other side of Jamie. They have me running all over the place.

Welcome to Woodsedge, freshman, RJ said.

Ally reached across Jamie and took Alec’s schedule. Sighing, she rolled her eyes. All the buildings are close together. You have it made.

Are you in any of my classes this year? Jamie asked her, digging his schedule out of his backpack.

I don’t know but if I am, that doesn’t mean I’m doing your homework for you, she said in a haughty tone.

Maybe he’s offering to do yours for you, RJ said flashing a brilliant smile.

She threw her crust at him. Whatever.

Ally, Jeana said, stopping briefly at their table to lean over Ally’s shoulder, tray in her hands. You don’t always have to sit with these guys. Come sit with us.

Ally looked over at the table where Jeana usually sat and shook her head. Most of the girls Jeana sat with were huge gossip mongers and Ally had no desire to listen to it. Besides, a couple of those girls had only tried to befriend Ally her freshman year when they found out her father was Jay Jones, lead singer for Tight Control.

Nah, I’m fine. Besides, these guys are more feminine than you think.

Cole grunted as the others threw various pieces of food at her.

She laughed, ducking and swatting, then slung her backpack over her shoulder and grabbed her tray. I am out of here. See you guys later.

Ally, Alec pleaded. You said you’d show me where my first class is.

I got your back, cuz, Jamie said, bumping Alec’s shoulder. She tries to play like she’s all tough and stuff but you know she wants to hang out with other girls and gossip about boys.

Cole chuckled as Ally sent him a glare. Laugh it up but those so called girls I gossip with are the ones you three want to date. She leaned closer, a wicked grin smeared across her pretty face. I can tell them things.

Wiggling her fingers, she marched out of the cafeteria, her long ponytail swinging behind her.

She’s evil, RJ said, watching her. I pity the guy who tries to tame her.

***

Ally slumped in her chair, listening to her History teacher drone on about classroom rules and what was expected of her that semester. It was the same old spiel every year and in every class. Picking up her pencil, she doodled idly on her new notebook, drawing little hearts and stars in the corners as her mind drifted.

Something was definitely off with Cole – she’d sensed it when she’d met up with him again Friday night at the bonfire. That carefree, easy friendship that had existed between the two of them since birth had been strained – almost forced. She was quite certain she knew the cause but she wasn’t ready to fess up just yet. She wanted to explore it a little more, see if it had any merit. And especially see if it was something she wanted to pursue.

As much as she loved Jamie and RJ and cherished their friendship, Cole had always been the closest to her – even though Jamie was her cousin. As a matter of fact, Cole was the first person she’d called when she’d received her acceptance letter into the elite softball camp she’d attended most of the summer. And she was the one he’d called through their younger years as his father battled his mother to gain custody of him.

She sighed, blowing at the minute strands of hair hanging in her eyes as she glanced at the dry erase board behind her teacher. They were only on rule number seven. The class was going to take forever. She wanted school to end so she could hunt down Cole in the music room and feel him out – see if he was sensing the change, too. She wanted to look into his muddy brown eyes and see that familiar affectionate look he always flashed her