In Search of Self: Poems and Tales of Love, Loss, and Self Worth

By Catherine Giguere

These poems are written about life, dreams, nightmares, love, loss, and learning my own self-worth and learning to love myself.

Forewarning, there is graphic content contained within... Read at your own course.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Catherine Giguere
• Release date: Feb 18, 2016
• ISBN: 9781524218546

Catherine Giguere

Catherine A. Giguere grew up in San Jose, California with two older brothers, a swarm of family members, and a wild and yet over-active imagination. She went to college in 2003 to study history and literature, and that is where she fell in love with Norse, Gaelic, and Greek mythology (as well as the history of their countries of origin). She often created her own worlds within her own reality, and lived vicariously through the characters in either the books she read or the stories she created. She fell in love with poetry around 1997, when she was only 13 years old and began reading and learning about word formations and how words could describe anything down to the most finite detail. After learning about English Literature and History in college, she studied the prose of old languages and older world writers.

Book preview

For You

This, is an ode... To all the lovers

The fighters, The stay up all nighters

This... Is for the people who - REFUSE -

To give in, to give up, to hate, to fear

This, is a poem, For you.

Everyday... you awaken, bright and loved, breathing and happy,

beautiful and new.

And everyday... you love, with every fiber and every notion and every move, you, are, wonderful.

The world - isn’t - nice,

and has never forgiven anyone for their vast indiscretions,

of the hate, and the fear mongering, the world has given you ...

you wonderfully beautiful shining star - start living.

This poem - these words, breathing from my neck like fire from a battered dragon, spitting tunes like reckless abandonment fearing for nothing ...

because nothing has ever caught me off guard like love.

Cherish - Live in this moment,

Breathe in the fire and the flames, of love and recklessness.

Stop - Judging

Stop judging your neighbors, your friends, your family, your lovers, the fighters, the stay-up-all-nighters.

You, have no right to be judge and jury, and fuel all this wrath and fury

Your right, is to love - and to show love, and to be love...

so - do - love.

Be, with me, love with me

Help me battle all these fears, this hate, this world that tends to discriminate...

Help me lick the wounds, of the helpless, the fallen

the people who can’t help but stall...

My mother and my father stand side by side, encircled by their own hate, their own fears, their own judgements

crashing down like heavy waves, in a storm of judgement and chaos.

I learned at an early age, that love was the best war, that anyone could ever rage.

Love - was a means to an end, and a start to a finish...

Love, is NOT for the faint of heart.

So you poets, you listeners, you readers, you beautiful people who feed,

off the words that I read - Listen...

Listen to the wind, and the words wrapped up in their song like cuddling on a long day, in a place only you love, with a person only you love.

Leave here - today - with these words, that I had to learn on my own,

with my own, and live them for me.

Because love, love is a war that left me battered and bruised,

and kicked down like a puppy with no chance of escape,

like tires that needed constant rotation and inflation,

love - is for the lovers, the fighters, the stay-up-all nighters

And, all, of my love... is for you.

A Million Stars

If you asked,

I would count a million stars

And tell you how every one

reminded me

of how much I love you,

How you complete me,

Every part of me,

Every ounce of me.

If you asked,

I'd swim the ocean for you

And count the waves

And tell you how each one reminded me how spectacular you are,

How amazing you are,

How sweet, sensitive and caring you are.

If you asked,

I'd gladly give you my heart,

My soul,

My everything,

Just so you knew that you mean the universe to me.

Please Forgive This...

A disclaimer, if you would....

I do not apologize for my words, my body, my soul, my mind

But since this society asks so much of me in so little time

I have been asked to apologize.

Please, Forgive me...

For not being a size ten,

I thought my curves And insatiable appetite

Was a come on for most men.

Please... Forgive me for having a sailor’s mouth,

There are often times that it is not necessary

But most times, when you are acting like an asshole

And you look like a bastard, I’ll say it, and mean it, 100%.

Please

Forgive my loud, proud, and boisterous voice,

I had no idea that we were all meant to be mute

with closed caption sequences turned on in French to make me sound more appealing.

Please... Forgive my eyes...

I see almost all people that speak ill-truths as,

Narrow-minded, pig-headed, egotistical ass nuggets.

Please... Forgive my bitchiness...

You know what.

On second