Status

By Joshua Holmes

Status is the continuing story of Chris, experienced academic and freelance graphic designer with Epilepsy, seeking to please his latest client, aspiring author, Nadine, and to achieve a sense of normalcy, even as he adjusts to an unconventional, seizure treatment plan. It is the story of past friend, Michael, who, with each passing day, becomes a distant memory. Meanwhile, Hank, a local church servant, helps Chris acclimate to a new community in York, Pennsylvania. It is the continuing story of Mary Grace, of how, after the big date, Chris discovers she isn’t the classy woman he thought she was, or the one for him. It is the story of Greta, of her late, ironic introduction, of Chris’s new attraction to her, and of how she fills his existing void. It is a vivid reminder of the transition process, the search for integration, the impact of old and new relationships, and the importance of never forsaking life’s endless pursuit.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Joshua Holmes
• Release date: May 29, 2016
• ISBN: 9781310870323

Joshua Holmes

A GRADUATE OF the Pennsylvania State University (M.Ed.), the Edinboro University of Pennsylvania (B.A.), and the Art Institute of York-PA (B.S.), Joshua Holmes has studied the fine arts, design, and writing for over 20 years.The sole proprietor and lead designer of JAHbookdesign, he also specializes in all areas of publishing, graphic design, and illustration (portraiture, animation, and wildlife). He has been commissioned by numerous collectors and authors within the community, and has won several awards in various shows and fairs. He has authored an autobiography, a how to series, and two fiction series about life with epilepsy, seventeen novels to date - The Art of Pastel Mastery, The Art of Colored Pencil Mastery, The Art of Oil Paint Mastery, The Art of Graphite Pencil Mastery, Memory Lapse, Grand Mal, Seizure, Status, Trigger, Design To Kill, Design For Justice, Shattered Lung, Design To Escape, Design For Honor, Design For Power, Design For The Cure, and Painting The Whole Picture: Portrait of an Artist with Epilepsy - all of which are available in print, ebook, and audiobook.He attributes his success to the Lord, and the strength God gives him in order to persist and grow as a more patient and thorough artist and writer. A vision cut in both eyes from brain surgery for epilepsy, and CP in his right side since birth, with the Lord's help, Josh continues to write, to see more detail, and to improve with time.He encourages you to explore and exercise your creative side, and enjoy what the Lord does through it.Visit Joshua Holmes at his professional site jahbookdesign.com and at all online book distributors.

Book preview

PROLOGUE

INVASION

Apparently, the call never ended when the phone slipped from my hand to the floor. Instead, the device hit hard, and the impact activated the speaker. My client, Nadine, would hear the second half of the episode through the receiver that settled just feet from where I seized.

It had to be the combination of the low light exhibited from my lamp and the competing light streaks that came at me from every other source. I wasn’t stressed, consciously anyhow. But my emotional state had never been a reliable predictor. Perhaps it was that I constantly had to stay alert, had to recognize the seizure could evade me, but also expect that it likely could invade me this very instant?

With each passing hour, the likelihood of a scene increased a bit more. And yet, several seizure-free days came and went, causing me to wonder if, just maybe, I would get through the project without frightening anybody. Not to get too melodramatic here, but the uncertainty followed you like a thief anxious to attack and secure a spoil. As Nadine quickly learned.

…

Extremely pleased with the proof, Nadine said first. The book turned out nicely."

For an instant, I imagined her narrow, expressionless face scrunching up in satisfaction, her free hand pulling at her long, brown/blonde-streaked hair.

That’s just great, I said. That’s what I love to hear.

Better than expected, to be honest.

Even as she talked, I tried to distance myself from any stimuli. I hurriedly turned off the TV. I drew the blinds further. Pushed aside my portable technology. It was a race against time.

I can’t believe we did it! Nadine continued, oblivious to my situation. So surreal!

Yes, I agreed, now walking to a darker place in the house. Surreal.

And it was. Up until now, the freelance design job – the consultation, editing, cover creation, and compilation processes – had gone wonderfully, and I hadn’t exposed Nadine to any of my condition’s antics.

So what next? she asked. We talked about making it into an e book? That option had been discussed, and my payment for it had already arrived.

My thoughts were getting jumbled. I was struggling to remember the order in which I should act out: Should I sit? Should I walk? Should I talk? I pulled out a chair at the dining table, stopped and put my hand to my mouth, and then internally scolded myself for behaving in a manner that made no sense.

Ah… Uhuh… I… uh. Ughh. Here we go, I thought. The notion of more paid work was exciting, but it wouldn’t stop what had started in my head. In more darkness, the electrical storm was spreading, and the next thing I knew, I couldn’t reply. The figurative fuse that powered my speech had blown.

My auras were light initially, slight waves, and I did mean to terminate the conversation then, but they grew stronger, into flashes, and, well, you know, inevitably overwhelmed me until I couldn’t complete a sentence or even stand upright.

In my final moments of clarity, I grunted and panted, my eyebrows twitching as I attempted to continue the exchange. But it was a lost cause.

There was a heavy pressure in my chest. I took a spill, the burden elevated, and twisted up under the lamp’s long cast shadow, I headed into the next phase. A blank phase.

Chris?

…

I came to what felt like a lifetime later, at an entirely different place in the house, and ironically to the phone ringing.

My forehead, chin, and right hand stung, the signs of carpet burn quickly forming in the three most common points of impact.

In an exhausted frenzy, I got up and stumbled towards the sound. The noise was coming from somewhere near the couch, and last minute I realized from under the cushion.

Phone in hand, I had to rectify the situation, had to allay Nadine’s fears; convince her everything would be ok, and that this didn’t change anything. Although it would.

I knew I still wasn’t in my right mind. Exhaustion and pain had me saying and doing things I never would in my proper state.

I heard once that seizures shouldn’t last longer than five minutes…

I checked my door lock. Not really sure why.

I’m sorry, I said. Really sorry.

No don’t be, said Nadine. But yeah, I thought you should like call 911 after five minutes.

I then walked to the light switch. Still unsure why.

No, I said. Honestly. I’m fine.

Isn’t that like dangerous?

I was intent on convincing Nadine to forget what she witnessed, but instead slurred an unintelligible response.

Like couldn’t it lead to… What’s it called? Status?

…

1

SHADES OF BLUE

As I finished at the computer terminal, reading the online, blog article – about a young girl who experienced my usual symptoms and tried blue lens glasses – the following day, reflecting as well on all I’d already tried for my epilepsy, I asked, What’s one more unconventional treatment?

Any blue tint I acquired locally would be a substitute for the original, therapeutic color Zeiss Z1 F133 (cobalt). And, according to the article, you could have the real thing applied to a lens, and shipped in from somewhere overseas. But I’d likely see what my personal eye doctor could do.

There was no way I was doing more of the standard: No way I was going through another brain surgery. No way I was doing the Ketogenic Diet. No way I was installing another VNS (Vagus Nerve Stimulator) device in my chest. No way I was going to try another anti-seizure medicine. I was leery about straight up and medical Cannabis use, and the CBD oil – extract or not – didn’t assure me in the least. But this? Perhaps.

Definitely something to think about, the tiny yet vocal assistant said. Possibly an avenue to pursue in the future, Chris.

Hopefully not too far in the future.

Seems the positive strides are here, said the assistant, eager to share her opinion. Seems that girl is benefiting.

Well, I’ve just about tried everything else…

Still nursing a tension headache from yesterday’s bout, it was hard to imagine one hefty investment and a small adjustment to my appearance could improve my day-to-day living. But that was the implication.

Your doctor never suggested this as an alternative?

In the thirty plus years I’d consulted doctors, I’d never heard the diagnosis ‘photosensitive epilepsy’, much less any fix for the wild sensations I’d endured.

Never, I said. You are the first.

Finally at a loss for words, the assistant said, Wow.

…

Blue enough for you?" asked Dune, the rail thin, broad-smiling eye doctor, months later.

They were for the time being, after they’d been darkened a second time. I wasn’t having near the reaction to outside stimuli, as the red wavelength wasn’t impacting me the same.

Much better, I said. Incredible. What a difference!

The first time he’d dipped my glass lenses into the blue pigment, they came out barely tinted, the hue failing to change the amount of auras I was having.

I had a slight reference point, as I’d also ordered and experimented with numerous, cheap, eBay sunglasses in the weeks leading up ‘til now with surprising success. Another tentative avenue my neurologist never suggested, by the way.

"You