And Then the Murders Began: Classic Literature Bestsellers' Opening Lines ReImagined Darkly

By Richard Saunders

The Mystery To This Book

...is to make you smile, laugh, or just shake your head.

Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no pictures or conversations in it, ‘and what is the use of a book,’ thought Alice ‘without pictures or conversations?’

And then the murders began.

Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland, By Lewis Carroll

It all started with a small quote from Marc Laidlaw who created a nice approach to revisiting first lines of books. His 3 March 2017 tweet said, “The first line of almost any story can be improved by making sure the second line is, 'And then the murders began.'”

This book was a test of that idea.

I took the first lines of the top 100 downloaded books from Gutenberg.org, in order, and applied that concept.

The idea does work in almost all cases to create something humorous (depending on your idea of what's funny.)

To be fair, in many cases, a better effect is often achieved once the scene is set. Especially when you are already familiar with the author's style. Romances seem to work best. Plays are awkward.

You can try this for yourself as you go – take only the first line and add “And then the murders began.” The results are more often than not incredibly hilarious. Sometimes merely droll. And even non-fiction can be as surprising.

Or, just read along with my excerpts and see which one you like better. I give you, then, two books in one. (Three, if you want to explore that classic further...)

Above all, the idea is to have fun.

Get Your Copy Now.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Publishdrive
• Release date: Apr 2, 2017
• ISBN: 9781365867194

Richard Saunders

Richard Saunders is an RCVS Specialist in Zoological Medicine. He has seen first opinion and referral rabbit patients for many years, at a number of practices. He is currently the RWAF (Rabbit Welfare Association and Fund) Veterinary Advisor, and provides support for the veterinary membership on difficult cases. He teaches Rabbit Medicine and Surgery at the University of Bristol, and has contributed several chapters to the BSAVA manuals of Rabbit Medicine, and Rabbit Surgery, Dentistry and Imaging.

Book preview

AND THEN THE MURDERS BEGAN.

Richard Saunders

The Reason for This Book

...is to make you smile, laugh, or just shake your head.

It all started with a small quote from Marc Laidlaw who created a nice approach to revisiting first lines of books.  His 3 March 2017 tweet said, The first line of almost any story can be improved by making sure the second line is, 'And then the murders began.'

This book was a test of that idea.

I took the first lines of the top 100 downloaded books from Gutenberg.org, in order, and applied that concept. (Although a few books needed a later selection, due to our current movie-driven preferences for action beginnings.)

The idea does work in almost all cases to create something humorous (depending on your idea of what's funny.)

To be fair, in many cases, a better effect is often achieved once the scene is set. Especially when you are already familiar with the author's style. Romances seem to work best. Plays are awkward.

You can try this for yourself as you go – take only the first line and add And then the murders began. The results are more often than not incredibly hilarious. Sometimes merely droll. And even non-fiction can be as surprising.

Or, just read along with my excerpts and see which one you like better. I give you, then, two books in one. (Three, if you want to explore that classic further...)

Above all, the idea is to have fun.

1

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

However little known the feelings or views of such a man may be on his first entering a neighbourhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the surrounding families, that he is considered the rightful property of some one or other of their daughters.

And then the murders began.

Pride And Prejudice, By Jane Austen

2

Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no pictures or conversations in it, ‘and what is the use of a book,’ thought Alice ‘without pictures or conversations?’

So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure of making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her.

And then the murders began.

Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland, By Lewis Carroll

3

It is very seldom that mere ordinary people like John and myself secure ancestral halls for the summer.

A colonial mansion, a hereditary estate, I would say a haunted house, and reach the height of romantic felicity—but that would be asking too much of fate!

Still I will proudly declare that there is something queer about it.

Else, why should it