Moral Obligation

By Gary Sowell

Moral Obligation is based upon a group of true stories that makes you think about what you would do if you were put in the same situations. This book does not make any judgement on any one nor does it decide right from wrong. It allowes you to make your own decision on what it means to you and how it will effect you in the future.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Sep 18, 2009
• ISBN: 9781449028787

Gary Sowell

I am a native of Colorado My father Booker T. Sowell was the first Black family to own property in Jefferson County. Our family was the first Blacks to attend and graduate from a Jefferson County School. I wrote and published the history for the school district as well as for the city of Lakewood, Colorado. I am the author of "Moral obligation" as well as "Just One Moment In Time". I have traveled to many places around the world that has inspired and changed me in many different ways.

Book preview

© 2009 Gary Sowell. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 9/16/2009

ISBN: 978-1-4490-2878-7 (e)

ISBN: 978-1-4490-2877-0 (sc)

Printed in the United States of America

Bloomington, Indiana

Contents

Reyna’s Story

About the Author

Moral Obligation by Gary Sowell is an eye-opening account of real life situations that occur every day in most everyone’s life. As editor of this book, countless soul searching hours were spent re-evaluating my own morals and values if life had given me the same situations as told in the book. As I opened my mind to look at the situations more deeply, I found that my past biases, perceptions and judgments were shortsighted and ineffective in making moral and sound obligations. It became clear that in a world of constant change, staying steadfast with doing the right thing while remaining flexible challenges us at the core of our being. Certainly, standing by your morals is not an easy task but an important one in order to stay true to oneself. Because of these stories, my life has changed for the better.

- Jennifer Ancona

Editor

While moral obligation gives us the ability to determine our conduct, moral obligation does not always determine whether our actions are right or wrong. Our moral obligation, which is primarily based from our parental up-bringing, generational traditions, and our knowledge gained through experiences, sets guidelines and expectations that hold us accountable for the actions we take. Time often determines and will be the judge in determining the best outcome of our actions. Asserting our moral stand can be a lonely place, especially if it opposes the opinions of others. Furthermore, in order to determine what our moral obligation to ourselves is, we must keep an open mind. An open mind allows us to consider the whole picture with all its parts, instead of limiting it to just one piece. And while only we will be held responsible for what we do and how we do it, under the microscope when we uncover all the layers, no judgment can be assessed anywhere. Our actions are neither right nor wrong – life just happened and it is what it is. It is our openness to what life presents in the moment that determines our right conduct and how we will act.

The stories that follow are true and are based upon everyday events that can happen anytime in life. At one time or another you may have found yourself in these same situations. Many times you thought you had made the right decision but in the end it proved differently. The decisions in the moment appeared to be the most moral with intentions toward what you thought were honorable, respectable and had the best outcome. But the consequences of your moral obligation allowed you to look at another perspective. Your peripheral vision widened to reveal a more global picture. Questions arose when looking at another perspective: Was my moral obligation authentic? What past influences were being replayed? Are there hidden closets" within myself that I am not willing to open and be revealed? What is really at stake here? Have I considered all the pieces to the puzzle, including myself?

As a point of reference, definitions and commentaries are perhaps in order before reading the stories. Let’s examine the meaning of the words, moral obligation, and being open minded. The Second College Edition: American Heritage Dictionary defines ‘moral obligation’ as ‘arising from conscience or the sense of right and wrong.’ In the past decade, the meaning of moral obligation has taken a dramatic change. Having moral obligation meant one is bound by his/her conscience to follow through with right conduct and character. Is that what it still means today?

Today, the word ‘moral’ appears to be used loosely like so many other words in the English language and may have changed from its original meaning. Why? If we look at history with its societal changes, we begin to see as values change so do behaviors. The imprinting we receive through institutions, whether parental, religious, the media or educational, has much power in reprogramming our conscience. With so much persuasive bombardment from every facet in our lives, our original moral obligation begins to waiver and is no longer rooted or grounded. We lose our sense of self by losing what is good, fair and just. Notwithstanding, the influences of society have so watered the original meaning of what it means to be obligated to your morals or ethics, that today, anything goes. A few examples: Three out of every five marriages end in divorce. Executive’s of corporations squandering employees’ retirement funds. Religious institutions preaching immorality but don’t practice what they preach. Sadly enough the alterations of the original meaning of moral obligation have become a life style for many.

To continue, being open-minded is defined as receptive to new ideas or to reason free from prejudice or bias. In particular, let’s look at the word, ‘reason.’ Being receptive to reason, free of biases, in turn allows us to use common sense with our moral obligation. Common sense is one of those words that everyone says, Oh, yes, I know what common sense is. It’s wearing a raincoat on a rainy day. But let’s take another look at it and go a bit deeper in its meaning.

The word ‘common’ means belonging equally to or shared equally by two or more. The word ‘sense’ has many meanings but for this purpose it means any animal functions of hearing, sight, smell, touch and taste. When using all five senses which are common within the human/animal functions, we have a clearer perspective of a situation because it allows us to take every facet into consideration. Animals rely on their senses as if their life depended upon it. For example, during the Tsunami in 2007, all of the animals had retreated to higher ground even before the waves hit the islands. What made them do that? They rely on all five of their senses to warn them from danger.

Humans are no different. Have we lost touch with paying attention to our senses? Our bodies do not lie; they tell us everything if we will just listen. If we listen attentively to our bodies using all five senses, we can align to what our senses tell us - whether it is dangerous or safe or whether to act now or wait. Our actions become proportionately aligned with how much we attune ourselves to our five senses. Thus, in order to lay the groundwork for the stories that follow, having moral obligations and being open-minded requires a keen awareness of self that does not waiver but is flexible and non-biased enough to allow common sense reasoning to change or modify his/her action.

Through telling these stories, what this book desires is to allow the reader to draw his/her own conclusions by examining his/her moral obligations if he/she were in the very same situations. Given the same circumstances, keeping an open, non-biased mind, would you act the same or differently?

Reyna’s Story

A hard working achiever with a degree in business and economics, Reyna learned the key for life success was only by making the right decisions. At the age of 22, her dream of a management position came true. It was a critical position that required her to make decisions for the company which affected the company’s gross profit. She gained respect and admiration from everyone that came in direct contact with her.

Reyna meets her ideal man and after dating for two years. She accepted his marriage proposal but only after both Reyna and Lexus agreed to stay true to each other as long as the quality of love and life prevailed. By agreeing to the conditions set forth and their ability to fulfill each others needs, the wedding date was set.

Believing that this was a story-book match, both sides of the family were very excited to hear their plans of marriage. Reyna and Lexus took the time to address both families to assure them that their decision was well planned, right down to the smallest detail. Each family member supported their decision which reinforced Reyna’s and Lexus’ commitment to one another. It was evident that Reyna was not about to accept anything less than what was agreed upon and Lexus, knowing that Reyna was a very intelligent, kind, loving woman, would hold him to his word no matter what. She made it very clear to him that she was determined to live a happy life and was willing to do whatever it took to achieve it.

Reyna’s determination to a happy, sound married life came from past family observation. She witnessed many problems when she would visit her half sister, Kristen during the summer months. She promised herself that she would never allow her life to be controlled by an unfaithful husband. After Kristen’s husband tried to make advances toward her, she stopped visiting during the summer months. When Reyna told her about his unfaithfulness, her half sister never believed Reyna. To Reyna’s dismay, all communications had ceased between them.

As an only child from a wealthy family, Lexus was given many more opportunities than most, but he never allowed it to cloud his visions of others. Instilled in his upbringing was a code of conduct that set him apart from the rest – always keep an open mind to the things that are going on around you and let your common sense be your guide. His father was retired from the military and the airlines as a civilian pilot and his mother was a very successful home mortgage broker. He was a natural born leader, respected in the community. Lexus learned well from his father who always held him accountable for every decision he made.

On the other hand, Reyna came from a very different family background. She was raised as an only child even though she had an older half sister, 10 years her senior. As a second generation emigrant from Mexico, her father worked his way up to starting a very successful construction company. Reyna’s mother was raised in the South where she was the youngest of five sisters and two brothers, but her father passed away when she was very young. With the help of the two older brothers, they managed well to keep everyone together. Reyna’s mother met her husband through a friend. They immediately knew they were right for one another and were married within a year. Reyna was well provided for, received a good education, and had the support of many cousins and family members that gave her a good foundation.

Planning everything together, Reyna and Lexus were married in the spring. They set goals for the future as to when they would start