Tragedy in the Making: Everyone Cannot Have a Brand New Start in Life, but Everyone Can Have a Brand New Ending

By Mzwandile P. Ntsonta

The book is entitled Tragedy In The Making. Its written after he the (author) experienced suffering, pain, struggle, and poverty for a very long time in his life because of wrong beliefs he subscribed to, wrong decisions and choices he have made. The truth is that people are overwhelmed by what they are going through in their daily living. People are trying so hard to make life work, and no matter how hard they try, they keep on failing. Because they are living their lives outside the parameters of Gods will for their lives. Tragedy in the Making is trying to live the life we have designed for ourselves versus failing to live the life that God has designed for us. When you keep doing things in your own way, instead of Gods way, you wont be able to manage your lifethat is a promise. The source of the suffering in this book is the result of mankind not comprehending the purpose and the plan of God for creating them. When I observe and look around in the world today, I see a lot of ongoing suffering, pain, struggle, and poverty in Gods people as well. I believe you can agree with me when I say, Some of the things we see daily in this world are heartbreaking. Most leaders are responsible for the suffering and struggle that we see in peoples lives. Whether be the heads of states, heads of institutions, or heads of families. Somehow, we are where we are today because someone has led us there. The solution in your suffering, sorrow, pain, and struggle can only be found in one man only, and his name is Jesus Christ. He came to reconcile us with the Father. He came to restore us into our original state and mend a broken relationship between us and God our creator.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Trafford Publishing
• Release date: Jul 27, 2012
• ISBN: 9781466947535

Book preview

Contents

Dedication

Acknowledgment

Foreword

Preface

Introduction

LOST CONTROL OVER OURSELVES

Loss Of Our God-Given Identity

Lack Of A Clearly Defined Purpose In Life

Enslaved By Sin

Unresolved Issues

PARALYZED BY EMOTIONS

Introduction

Paralyzed By Fear

Paralyzed By Anger

Paralyzed By Stress

Paralyzed By Pride

FAILING TO BALANCE THE

IMPORTANT AREAS OF OUR LIVES

Introduction

Failing To Manage Our

God-Given Resources

Spiritual Starvation

Untransformed Minds

Lack Of Understanding God’s Purpose For Family

Notes

About The Author

DEDICATION

I dedicate this book to my three brothers, Xhalisile David Ntsonta, Thamsanqa Kaizer Ntsonta, Makhwenkwe Abraham Ntsonta; my sister-in-law, Puleng Jutaita Ntsonta; my nephew, Zwelakhe Leeba; my friend, Bongani Anthony Mkhize; and my daughter, Ntandokazi Princess Ntsonta. May you all rest in peace. We will forever miss you.

ACKNOWLEDGMENT

To my father, Mr. Dolf Ntsonta, ndiyabulela Gxharha, Mvhambani, Mahlahlani, Cwerha elihle, ndiyabulela ngothando ondinike lona, ndibulela uThixo ngawe no mama, ndinithanda kakhulu andinamazwi anokubonakalisa uthando lwam kuni. I thank you for being a good father to all of your children. May God bless you and keep you.

To the blessed womb that endured the pain of giving birth to ten children, me being the sixth child, to the woman who taught me everything that I am, the woman who introduced me to Christ, the woman who is so humble in every way and to everyone, my mother, Mrs. Nothembile Ntsonta, all I want to say is keyaleboha moradi oa ha Mosenogi, Mmina tshepe ya motsho, keya leboha ka tsohle tseo o nketseditseng tsona ho tloha bo nyenyaneng baka. May God richly bless you, and may you see many more years.

To all my siblings, my brother, Sandile Ntsonta, and his wife, Nokwakha Ntsonta; my sister-in-law, Nomziwakhe Ntsonta; my sister, Nomathemba Ntsonta, and her husband, Themba Mnguni; my sister, Nombulelo Ntsonta; my brother, Fikile Ntsonta; my sister, Nompumelelo Ntsonta, ndinithanda kakhulu kwaye ndibulela uthando lwenu nenxaso yenu, ingaUthixo anganigcina anisikelele. Thank you for making me understand the significance of a happy family.

To my nephew, Siyabonga Choko, thank you for the knowledge of God in your life.

To all my nephews and my nieces and to all the Ntsonta and Mosenogi families all over the country, thank you for your support and your love. I love you, guys. God bless you all.

To my friend, my companion, my partner, my love, my significant other, the bone of my bones, the flesh of my flesh, the apple of my eye, siponono sami, my beautiful wife, Hlobisile Nothobile Ntsonta, you are indeed a blessing in my life. Thank you for praying for me without ceasing. Thank you for loving me, thank you for supporting me, thank you for understanding the vision of God upon my life. We’ve been through so much in life together as a young couple, and thank you for not bailing out on our marriage when things got tough. You are my soul mate. May you grow old with me, until death do us part. I love you so much. May God give you all the desires of your heart, may He protect you, and may His light shine upon you for all the days of your life.

To my son, Lonwabo, and my daughter, Unathi Ntsonta, I love you more than anything bantwana bam. You are the reason I have found myself. You are the reason I have changed for the better. Young as you are, I want you to know that I love you more than anything. I wouldn’t exchange you for anything in the whole world. You have brought such a great joy in my life. You have given me hope to dream again. I love you very much. May God keep you and protect you, may He guide you in all your ways, and may you also love and fear Him more than anything in this life. May you go after your dreams and everything you desire to be in life.

To my second family, all the congregation of Agape Faith Mission in Graceland, Germiston, and my Pastor Isai Theron, and his wife, Ophelia Theron, I thank you so much, man of God. You guys are such a blessing in the body of Christ. I respect you, sir. May God richly bless you and prosper you in every area of your life. Pastor Rainor Skosana, thank you, woman of God, for your prayers. May you continue to do the good work that you are doing. To the youth Pastor Galebohi Tau, thank you for the encouragement and your prayers. To my team, Mr. Romeo Mabasa, thank you for believing in my God-given talent. Thank you for giving me the platform to share my gift with the world. Thank you a million times. May God’s light shine upon you. May you continue to do the good works for the Lord. Mr. Setjhaba Msibi, I thank God for bringing you in my life. You are such a blessing, mfana. To my spiritual father and mentor, Pastor Vukile Balintulo, I thank God for you, Tata. You are such an inspiration in my life. I don’t know where to begin thanking you. Thank you for believing in me when no one believed in me. Thank you for the courage and strength you gave me. God bless you, sir.

To all my colleagues at work, thank you, guys, for everything. God bless you and your families.

To all my friends, Ntsikelelo Mandla, Vukile Mandla, Leloko Mmevane, Mthuthuzeli Charles, Ntsiane Ramokoatsi, Mr. Vika Mpisane and his wife, Sister Nompumelelo; to all my other friends on Facebook that I didn’t mention here, thank you, guys. May God richly bless you and your families. May you all find joy, peace, and happiness in this life.

To my mother-in-law, Mrs. Thoko Khumalo, thank you for loving me as your son. Thank you for taking care of my family. When things were tough, you always came through for us. God bless you. To my brothers-in-law, Mandla, Dumisani, Lucky, Makhosonke, Manqoba, and their wives, thanks, guys, for your support. May God bless you and your families.

To all the people of South Africa, whether you know me or you don’t know me, thank you so much for your prayers. God bless you and your families.

To Trafford Publishing Company in the Unites States of America thank you for an excellent and perfect service you have given me from day one in making sure I get the best from you. To Margaret Daniels, my publishing consultant and Jeff Quincy and the editorial team and the production team thank you so much. God bless you all.

And finally, last but not least, to my Heavenly Father, my source, my supplier, the one who protected me from death, the one who deposited the seed of greatness within me, the one who said, For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future, the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end, the author and the perfecter of my faith, the giver of life, the sustainer of my life, my all, the I am, that I am, I thank you, Lord, for calling me from yourself for the earth. I thank your son, Jesus Christ, for restoring, redeeming, and saving me from myself and from this dangerous world. Thank you for the grace. I also thank you, Holy Spirit, for being my director. Thank you for convicting me. Thank you for interceding on my behalf. Thank you for the fellowship. I’m forever grateful.

FOREWORD

God has given us the spirit to prognosticate, the ability to forward-think, to have a feeling that something is going to go wrong based on certain actions and reactions. Yet many of us choose to ignore that little voice in our hearts, heads, or minds. We choose to react based on the current situation, but most sadly, we choose not to respond to the danger ahead of us because in many instances, we are afraid of what or who we might lose. Some call that the fear of the unknown.

We settle for less in the hope that we might get more.

We hope for the best even after we know it won’t happen.

We stick around hoping the situation will change in our favor.

We wish for the best from others, but we won’t let them know.

This book, Tragedy in the Making, seeks to encourage us to face our challenges proactively, not to wait for things to get worse before we decide to take action. We live in a society where we are surrounded by a lot of painful experiences, we watch too much sad news and that creates fear in our own lives; and in most cases, those experiences paralyze our hope for a better tomorrow. So many of us end up not even trying for a better life. We watch in discouragement as those we look up to fail, divorce, commit suicides, etc. We model our lives around other people, yet we forget that they are also fallible. This book is a good reminder that there can only be one source—God himself. We all know that He is a jealous God, and like a father, He is waiting for us to reach out to Him so he can provide the much needed help we seek. This book reminds us that we are not born to suffer, but to live a fulfilled life that God intended for us in the first place, and further seeks to encourage you to reconnect with Him in order to tap into that life. Mzwandile, through his personal experiences, takes you on a journey of self-discovery; and by committing a day to read this book, you will avoid a lot of headaches and heartbreaks. I also encourage you to recommend this book to others going through similar experiences.

Happy reading,

Romeo Mabasa

PREFACE

What I have realized in life is that most people make the mistake of thinking that they suffer and struggle in life because of their financial instability or because of unemployment. It is possible to be employed yet suffer and struggle in life. It is possible to have money yet not fulfilled in your life. Other people think they suffer because of oppression by others. People think they suffer because of their skin color and their disadvantaged backgrounds. On one hand, some blacks still believe that they are still suffering because of what an apartheid system did to them in South Africa. And some whites, on the other hand, think they are suffering because of the sins of their forefathers; hence, they feel they have not been given a fair chance to contribute toward building and developing the new South Africa. This mindset has created a victim’s mentality to every South African, and this mindset has made people to think that the world owes them something or that other people owe them an explanation. Some people are saying they suffer because of poverty and lack of resources, which has left them at a disadvantaged position. Others think they suffer because of various sicknesses or they suffer because they have bad luck or they suffer because of witchcraft.

I hear people say, We suffer mainly because we don’t know our biological parents, and these people believe all the bad luck in their lives is normally associated to the fact that they haven’t been introduced to their ancestors, amadlozi, and therefore, everything that is wrong in their lives is believed to be connected with them not knowing their cultures and their roots; hence, people go to the cemetery to ask for the blessings and open doors to the ancestors with a believe that the ancestors will help them with their sufferings. How can you ask people that suffered themselves while on earth open doors for you? Come on, really? Others say, We suffer because we earn so little from the companies we work for. We have been exploited by these companies. We suffer because of the escalating crime where we live. The list goes on and on. We suffer because of this and that. People are justifying why there is so much pain and suffering in their lives. This list has made them complain about everything yet they fail to change their situations. Have you been around people who complain about everything yet fail to take an initiative to change their situations?

Most people are attributing their sufferings and struggles to the circumstances around them, or they are blaming others, saying they are directly responsible for the sorrows and pain they are going through in life. To justify is to have a reason, fact, circumstance, or explanation that defends. People who are always justifying are people who are always blaming others or their circumstances for their sufferings and struggles. These are the people who always want to give reasons why they are failing. Most people think that they have been deliberately placed on earth just to suffer, to struggle, and be miserable until they die. I believe that what most people think is the reason for their suffering is not actually the real reason. It is the mission of this book, therefore, to show you why most people are suffering and struggling.

Why don’t they have peace of mind? Why are they trapped in poverty? Why are they limited by a paycheck? Why are they not productive and effective? Why do they think others are created better than them? Why are they slaves to their own environment and their surroundings? Why are they mastered by the very things they were supposed to rule? Failure in living a fulfilled life is the result of us being out of position. Position is a place where someone or something should be. Most people have misplaced themselves. They are not where they should be. Misplacement makes them not do what they are born to do. They have lost the assignment of God for their lives. Misplacement makes them all over the place, doing unnecessary things, committing themselves in the wrong things, making them continue suffering and struggling. When we are not where we should be in life, life will torment us. It will frustrate, stress, and depress us. This long list of justified reasons has made people think they are victims of the past, their environment, and the situations they find themselves into. Misplacement has kept God’s people unproductive and ineffective for too long. It is being out of position that has kept God’s people to live for survival, yet they were not created for just getting by in life. When you don’t know your identity, you will go through life without knowing who you are, why you are living, where you are going, and how to contribute to the plan of God for your life. Being out of position makes many people go through life aimlessly, without meaning, direction, purpose, and fulfillment.

Most of us are busy trying to fight the symptoms of all our problems, instead of dealing with the root cause of our problems. A symptom is a sign of an undesirable situation. It’s a sign of disease. It’s a sign that something is not right. We all know that something is not well with our lives. There are signs that show us that we are heading for ruin. We really need to find the root cause of our problems. Whenever we deal with the surface things in our lives and fail to get rid of the root cause, whatever we are fighting against will be reestablished very strongly the second time around, making it more difficult to deal with. You don’t deal with the problem by eliminating the signs; you deal with the problem by identifying the actual root cause of your misery, digging deep into it, cutting it off in order to make necessary changes in how you will approach life.

I believe that the governments of the world fail, more especially in the third world countries, because the leaders don’t deal with the source of the people’s problems. Hence, they give temporal solutions. The habitants of those countries will forever be sick, poor, and controlled by other countries because their leaders are afraid to tell them that they don’t actually have solutions to the problems they are facing. These problems are man-made, and the only person who can deliver the world from all of its problems, from all sorrows, poverty, sicknesses, sufferings, and struggles, is God, no one else. Leaders can do whatever they want. They can have as much conferences and summits, but they will never deliver their people from their sorrows, pain, and suffering. People go round in circles thinking of reasons why their lives are miserable, they spend their precious time trying to find solutions, but no matter how hard they try, they fail. Why? Because they are looking for solutions in the wrong places and in the wrong people.

Tragedy in the Making is a book written to give you hope. It’s a book that will make you understand that your suffering has got nothing to do with what you think you don’t have, or what you think you cannot do, or what you think other people did to you.

It’s a book about you understanding that you have shortchanged yourself, and others took advantage of you by benefiting from your gifts and talents, your time, effort, energy, creativity, and your resources. It’s a book that will explain why you are suffering, and it is because you are paralyzed by negative emotions from the devil. It will make you understand that you are always stuck because you are busy trying to make a living instead of living. In a nutshell, it’s a book that will make you understand that you only suffer in this life because you have declared independence from your source which is God. As you begin to take the journey in this book with me, I want to make it clear to you that you cannot go anywhere in life if you think you are in charge of your own life. Life without God doesn’t make sense, life without God is tragic, and life without God is a waste of time. You can only be fulfilled in life when you give God total control over your life. God is the god of order. Everything that God created is in a certain order; so for us to be fulfilled in life, we need to follow the order of God, and anything that we do outside the order of God will make us suffer. Also, God created us to reproduce ourselves. This is the principle of life: productivity, fruitfulness, and multiplication. Being out of position makes us not produce what is required by God. Fulfillment in life comes only when we produce what is required by our source. Anything that we produce that is not required will make us suffer. You were given the seed to reproduce yourself. Many people are consumed in life by doing second things first, things they were not created to do. They spend time, effort, energy, money, creativity, intelligence, and resources in things they were not created for. Moreover, I want you to understand that we were created to give ourselves to God. We were created to worship God. We were created to love God. We were created to work for him. We were called according to His purposes. In other words, God called us from Himself for the earth. Whatever God calls for, He provides for. I believe that this book will make you take your position, and it will also make you know your place, both on the earth and in humanity. It will make you know the plans and the purposes of God for your life and how to live a fulfilled life.

Proverbs 19:21, Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.

INTRODUCTION

Let’s try to make sense out of the title of this book before we go deep into it. The book is entitled Tragedy in the Making . It’s written after I have experienced suffering, pain, struggle, and poverty for a very long time in my life because of the wrong decisions and choices I have made. The book is also about what others are going through and what you are going through in your life right now and don’t know how to come out from the adversities you are facing currently. When I observe and look around in the world today, I see a lot of ongoing suffering, pain, struggle, and poverty in God’s people as well. I believe you can agree with me when I say some of the things we see daily in this world are heartbreaking. Most leaders are responsible for the suffering and struggle that we see in people’s lives, whether be the heads of states, heads of institutions, or heads of families. Somehow, we are where we are today because someone has led us there.

I want us to begin by defining the term tragedy because I know when you think of the term tragedy, you will probably assume the book itself is tragic or has an unhappy ending. No, this is not the case with this book. The book is about turning or changing the tragedy we are making into a meaningful, significant, and fulfilling life as God intends.

What is a tragedy? (1) In real life, of course, a tragedy is any terrible event; (2) a story or play showing the struggles and unfortunate events (even death) of the main character or hero of the story; (3) tragedy is simply a disastrous event, either expected or unexpected, that causes sadness or suffering; (4) tragedy is when something bad happens, for example, death; (5) when something terrible happens to you; and (6) something that has caused a heck of stress or sadness upon you all of a sudden.

You know, once you watch a tragic movie, you are expecting an unhappy ending. You are expecting a sad and painful ending. Let’s break down our definition. I want us to look at the meaning of the words that are highlighted bold in order to make sense out of our title:

Event A thing that happens.

Cause A person or thing that gives rise to an action, phenomenon, or condition.

Sadness An emotional pain associated with, or characterized by, feelings of disadvantage, loss, despair, helplessness, sorrow, and rage.

Suffering Pain in a broad sense; an individual’s basic affective experience of unpleasantness and aversion associated with harm or threat of harm.

Unhappy Not happy, not lucky, unfortunate.

Ending A conclusion or termination; a concluding part; a finale: a happy or unhappy ending.

Making Form something by putting parts together or mixing substance or add up to.

Struggle Make forceful or violent efforts to get free of restraint or constriction.

Condition Circumstances affecting something, an illness or medical problem.

If I may ask you, do these terms ring the bell to you? Do they define your life? Do they reflect what you see happening in the world today? Are you at a point in your life where you can really say I’m happy/unhappy in my life? Do you think you don’t have control over your suffering and struggles? This book is for you and all those you know who are miserable in their lives as well. It’s okay to admit that you are suffering because of your inability to manage your life so that you can get help. Many people have died silently because they were afraid to admit to others what they went through. When you don’t speak out, others won’t know that you need help. Whenever you feel like talking and you happen not to trust anyone, just go to a secret place and cry out to your Creator, and He won’t share your problems with others. You can trust Him with everything. Now, in life, there are things we don’t have control over. We can’t control the rain, the storms, the wind, tornadoes, and volcanoes, and all other natural disasters. We don’t have control over birth and death. We don’t choose when, where, and how we are born. We don’t choose to be black or white or red or blue. We don’t choose to be male or female. God designed us according to His specifications. But we have control over the decisions and choices we make in life every day. We control our lives by choosing the things that will benefit us and others, and sometimes we choose things that destroy us. We choose how our lives turn out. We choose to do right or do wrong. We choose to be positive or negative. We choose to have a victor’s mentality or a victim’s mentality. We choose to be winners or losers. Whatever you choose will determine the direction your life will take. You are where you are because that is where you have subconsciously chosen to be. Where you are is the direct results of decisions and choices you made yesterday.

Proverbs 2:11, Wise choices will watch over you. Understanding will keep you safe.

Most people suffer in life simply because they don’t make wise choices in their lives and don’t understand the plan of God for their lives. Understanding who you are and who God created you to be will keep you safe from wasting your life. One of the things that God gave us is a free will to choose. God will never force us to do something we don’t want. We choose what to do with the life He gave us. Basically, we choose what to do with everything God entrusted us with. You can decide not to acknowledge God as the Supreme Being and to live according to His principles. It is okay. That is your choice. We all have choices in this life, and our choices either make success possible or difficult for us.

This book is not about the things that we don’t have control over, but things we do have control over. The tragedy that I’m talking about results from the things we put ourselves into, things that limit us, things that make us fail to function at our maximum potential, and the decisions and choices we make every day. Life is a series of events. Now, I want you to understand that as we walk, talk, act, and think, we are busy making something. As we sleep and wake up, go to school, go to work, sit at home, do nothing, go to church, we are busy making something.

As we buy houses, drive nice cars, get married, make babies, run businesses, we are busy making something. As we are party, abuse alcohol and drugs, have sex with every person we come across with, we are busy making something. The big question is what are we making? In life, everything has a beginning and an end. King Solomon said, in the book of Ecclesiastes 3:1, For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest (NLT). King Solomon simply says that there is a beginning of something and there is an end of it. Whatever you sow, you shall also reap. As much as we have begun this journey of life, the end is coming.

There are so many people we were traveling with in this journey of life. Some are our family members, friends, community members, and their journey in life came to an end. My pastor used to say, It is not how you begin your race that counts, but how you finish it. Some of us began this race with the wrong footing and later realized we were lost and turned from our destructive ways. Others are still struggling to come out. If you happen to be one of those people who are finding it difficult to come out, I don’t think it is too late for you to start all over again. Come out while you still can.

One man once said, The only thing that doesn’t have a beginning and an end is a circle. Most people are caught up in this circle of life, going around in a circle, which causes sadness, pain, suffering, and struggle in their lives. Most people are doing the same things over and over again and expect different results. People are caught up in the circle of poverty, and what most of us don’t understand is that poverty is an end product of what we are making daily. It is the result of the choices we and our leaders have made. In other words, poverty is a state of the mind.

People are caught up in the circle of sicknesses and diseases and don’t understand that sicknesses and diseases are end products of what they are making daily, resulting from the choices they have made. People are caught up in a victim’s mentality, blaming others and circumstances for their suffering. People are caught up in a circle of life because they have lost their God-given identity, lacking a clearly defined purpose for their lives. You must understand that when people choose to be controlled by the very same things they were supposed to have control over, suffering and struggle will be a continuous force present in their lives. They are being stripped off their God-given authority and they will never function at their maximum potential as people given power to control this earth.

It is not the intention of this book to give you ten steps to financial freedom or seven keys to live successfully or eight principles to the life you want. I know people want immediate steps to become wealthy, successful, and prosperous and live a good life. Others think by reading few books on wealth and success, they will be wealthy themselves. It takes more than reading a book to be successful and prosperous or live the kind of life you have been dreaming about. God has to break you and make you first to the shape He wants because you have been messed up by this world. You need to be transformed from the mindset of this world into the mindset of God’s kingdom.

You must first understand the laws and principles of this kingdom. You must apply God’s principles and guidelines in order to be fulfilled and be everything you have been created to be. You have to discover your purpose for living and live out your purpose in order to be fulfilled in life. When we fail to apply these principles in every area of our lives, we fail to function at our maximum potential, we become unproductive and ineffective, and we get limited in everything we do. When you don’t have a clear purpose for your life, you will be a pawn for other people; you will make more money for others than you make for yourself. In his book entitled The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen R. Covey said, If you want to achieve your highest aspirations and overcome your greatest challenges, identify and apply the principle or natural law that governs the results you seek. Life is meaningless without the application of God’s laws and principles in our lives. Failing to apply God’s laws and principles makes many people search for the meaning of their lives in all the wrong places.

Here is a promise: Most people will forever search for the meaning of life and will never find what life is all about. They will never be fulfilled in life, unless they reconnect themselves with the one who is their true source of life and their true source of joy. I want you to take this book as some sort of reflector. Look into your own life—your family life, your community, your finances, your thought s, your career,