Better Not Bitter
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About this ebook
Elder Richard H. Harris Jr.
Elder Richard H. Harris Jr. has been in active in ministry since January 1, 1994. He was ordained to preach, teach, marry and eulogize in 2003. He received his Masters degree in Pastoral Counseling December 2008. Elder Harris has been associated with two churches in his tenure, The Lighthouse Ministry 1993-2009 (Youngstown, Ohio) Bishop Leroy Jenkins, Pastor; The Enon Baptist Church 2011 to present (Atlanta, Georgia) Dr. Pastor Gregory L. Pollard, Senior Pastor. Elder Harris experiential, education and training in life, human services, social work, ministerial and pastoral counseling has been helpful to many as well as many led to Christ Jesus. He has been happily single for 25 years putting the Ministries and others in the forefront. He has 5 adult sons (3 married) one beautiful daughter, who Ministry and career is in Health and Wellness. He is a resident of Atlanta Georgia since 2009.
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Better Not Bitter - Elder Richard H. Harris Jr.
2015 Elder Richard H. Harris, Jr. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.
Published by AuthorHouse 12/07/2015
ISBN: 978-1-5049-1013-2 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-5049-1012-5 (hc)
ISBN: 978-1-5049-1011-8 (e)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2015906865
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
Scripture quotations marked KJV are from the Holy Bible, King James Version (Authorized Version). First published in 1611. Quoted from the KJV Classic Reference Bible, Copyright © 1983 by The Zondervan Corporation.
Contents
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Foreword
Preface
Chapter 1 My Childhood: Tears and Bad Memories
Chapter 2 Adulthood: All Hell Breaks Loose
Chapter 3 Walking in the Valley of Death
Chapter 4 Prison: In Bondage and Ensnared
Chapter 5 Spiritual Healing: I Can do all things which Strengthens me through Christ
My Life Today: Better Not Bitter
A Closing Prayer
Poems
About The Author
Dedication
To Jesus Christ who is my Lord and Savior, My Hope, Rock, Counselor, Advocate, Inspiration, and Strength.,
In memory of my parents, Richard H. Harris, Sr.
and Odessa Harris Powell;
to my five sons, Damean, M., Richard H. III, Duane R., Brandon L., Bryan M., and my precious daughter, Brittany R. Harris, all of whom have been a driving force of strength and a determining factor for me to evolve into a better man, person, and father. Although it is God who changes the individual and the individual who decides to walk with God, you, my children, are all significant factors in my desire to change. Thanks for your support, encouragement, forgiveness, and love.
Acknowledgments
There are a bevy of interesting and wonderful people who enhanced and enlightened my quality of life in a variety of ways. Their contributions enabled and empowered me to write this book. Although this journey has been long and tedious and still developing, I thank God for all that has transpired— the good and the bad. Being saved, delivered, and filled with the Holy Ghost, did not exempt me from daily trials, tests, temptations, persecutions, tribulations, and long suffering. My vision for writing this book came during my incarceration. I trusted God to change, challenge, and make me over. I choose to be better not bitter. During this holding pattern in life, my faith was set in motion; God took out my stony heart and replaced it with a heart of flesh. God slowly allowed the walls of rejection, abandonment, loneliness, hatred, and selfishness to dissipate.
To the innumerable people who helped through prayer, patience, words of encouragement, and even attitudes I say, Thank you and I thank God for you!!
Foreword
The integrity of Richard Harris lies in the fact that he is open to growth. As his Pastor of 5 years, I have challenged that statement on many occasions and he has never caused me to regret doing so. He walked into ministry secure enough in himself to withstand every degree of difficulty and to receive correction without feeling that his character had been flawed nor his intelligence challenged. I can say with great assurance that he is a baptized believer of Jesus Christ and he is definitely filled with the presence of the Holy Ghost. He is an example of a man who has journeyed through life with hope and the Favor of God.
The life experiences he shares in this book will serve as a guide to those who are without hope. It shows that through God all things are possible and that each and every situation we encounter in life is beneficial. I’m thankful to God that Elder Richard Harris possesses the courage to expose and unveil his life and to be transparent to the world for the sake of the Kingdom.
His statements from this book, Prison had become a school of higher learning for me…, it is profound to me to know I am going to be dead longer than I will be alive
, are thought provoking and encouraging to me as Senior Pastor to The Enon Church, Atlanta, Georgia.
Favor may come with a cost but God’s salvation is free to anyone who confesses His Name. This a testament that one can be locked up but most certainly not locked OUT of Christ. Elder Harris’ life story is a testament to God’s favor and His salvation. In my thirty five years of preaching, twenty four of those years as a pastor, I have read a great deal of literature on every level and area of ministry. However, I have never encountered anyone who makes it as plain, practical and principled as Elder Richard Harris Jr. I believe the words contained here in this book will transform and catapult each reader to a higher personal dimension in the Lord Jesus Christ.
Dr. Gregory L. Pollard, Senior Pastor
The Enon Church
Preface
I began writing this book in early April, 1995 while a prisoner in body, mind, and soul. I was saved and delivered from self, drugs, and alcohol on January 1, 1994. At the time, I was already one year physically incarcerated for a 1993 felonious assault charge for which I’d been convicted on March 4, 1994. At age 43, this was my first and last incarceration, only by the grace of God through His son, Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.
I can say without equivocation that the Bible’s role in my life is paramount. My way of thinking and living without the Bible empowered my sin, weighty burdens, and erratic behavioral patterns. This mindset and tumultuous cycle which began from birth, set in motion my worldly choices and decisions. Forty-three years into worldly deception which included parental fighting/divorces, being thrust into parental roles and social introversion was hard. My battle was with self, alcohol, drugs, and societal interaction. Interwoven challenges with a prejudice work environment, unhealthy marriages, manhood accountability/responsibility, death of familial/friends, and prison time had made me exceedingly weary.
This book addressed how the issues of sex, money, alcohol, drugs, and a host of other sinful ways affected my life and the lives of those around me. The book explores deeply how my heart issues, wilderness mentality, and environmental issues along with traditional and cultural upbringing collided. Then, these pages disclose the dynamics of my ongoing change process by renewing my mind through Holy Scriptures.
Because its foundation is the Holy Bible, this book is intended to unite and engage the reader with Holy Scriptures. The purpose is to bring empowerment, enlightenment, enhancement and renewed hope toward restoration with God. I have spent over fifteen years preparing this book and forty-five years experiencing it. My ultimate heart’s desire is that this labor will, in some way, bring glory to God and uplift someone misinformed.
God gave me the alone time I needed to complete this book, without the distractions of a wife and young children. I wrote the bulk of it in prison and spare moments while in college for seven years. I planned to finish it after my associate’s degree in 2004, but God blessed me to complete two more degrees.
Therefore seeing we have this ministry, as we have received mercy, we faint not;
(2Cor. 4:1 KJV). The time away from Church, volunteering and extended family was difficult but the personal time with God, contemplation, and writing proved fruitful. The seeds for this book were planted through self-motivation, life experiences, and my willingness to help others with similar situations. I’ve come to understand you cannot help others with the same mind-set I once owned, but since renounced. But have renounced the hidden things of dishonesty, not walking in craftiness, nor handling the word of God deceitfully; but by manifestation of the truth commending ourselves to every man’s conscience in the sight of God.
(2Cor.4:2 KJV)
Finally, my ministry has reached very diverse audiences in terms of age, religious persuasion, educational levels, and social backgrounds. Struggles are not respecter of persons, so neither am I. I have sought to write this book without specific readers intended. It is my prayer that God through Jesus Christ, richly blesses everyone who reads the pages that follow.
There are no secrets in Christ Jesus "What fruit had ye then in those things whereof ye are now ashamed? (Romans 6:21a KJV). I am grateful to have undertaken God’s Word realizing he has paid for my sin, shame, and guilt. The Bible is specific on three things one must do to broaden spiritual maturity.
Then Jesus said to his disciples, If any man will come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me.
(Matthew 16:24 KJV)
I protest by your rejoicing which I have in Christ Jesus our Lord, I die daily." (1 Corinthians 15:31 KJV)
Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time.
(1 Peter 5: KIV6)
It saddens me that many Christians are not taught these Biblical principles which are required daily for one’s daily spiritual development. In addition, it gives me great encouragement that I can write with the veracity of God’s word through my witness.
Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: No man cometh unto the Father but by me. If ye had known me, ye should have known my Father also. And henceforth ye know Him and have seen Him.
(John 14:6-7 KJV).
I retired from an industry that manufactured light in the natural sense to every household, business, and dark places (street lights, etc.). I now commit to supplying spiritual illumination which is greater and more essential to life.
Then spake Jesus again unto them, saying, I am the light of the world: He that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.
(John 8:12 KJV).
I understand I cannot go back to the way I used to do things, there is no future going back. My life and ministry are dependent on the enabling power and renewing power of God in Christ Jesus. I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me
(Galatians 2:20 KJV).
My Childhood: Tears and Bad Memories
At the ripe age of 43, I was removed from society for the first time ever. The physical freedom I was accustomed to having was gone, but my spiritual liberty would be born and my mind renewed. Incarceration presented new challenges in my life. Not excluding pain, hurt, and other feelings, but allowing God to change my thoughts, words, actions, habits and character. In April, 1995, I was inspired to write about my life experiences. I’d done a year on my bit (prison time) which consisted of a three-year gun specification and 5 to 15 years on the felonious assault. In layman’s terms, I could be released after serving three years and a third of the 5 to 15. It does suffice to say, I had plenty of time to reflect.
Although my memory is still somewhat hazy from years of alcohol, drug, and other substance abuse it’s easy to remember pain. Unwanted feelings and pain started for me very early in life. The pain of my early years nested in Ma and Dad’s bedroom which resembled an adult battleground. I shed many hidden tears between the ages of 7 and 15 years old. Most times, their bedroom door was shut. The violence in my parents’ bedroom which manifested in verbal, physical, and emotional attacks could be heard all over the house. Their room was filled with cussing, unidentifiable but disturbing noises, accompanied quite often with the sounds of physical fighting. While we kids could hear what was going on, looking inside was off-limits.
I felt a sense of hopelessness because I wanted to defend my mother, but was fearful of my dad. It was hard to understand why dad was beating her, but it soon became our family’s normal.
Although as I describe each individuals room it’s because each had a particular affect on me. We moved for revitalization purposes around 1960 I was 10 years old with an older sister 13 and, three younger brothers, 9, 5 and 4 and my baby sister will be born seven years later. I heard my dad more than I saw him because he worked crazy swing shift hours in the steel mill. So I would only see him come and go to work occasionally. At times, he would drop off a box of donuts or a gallon of ice cream for us to eat. I grew to accept his absence in my life, at sporting and school events, at the dinner table, and most of