I, Sex Robot

By Rob Ward

When Dr Jenna Judson applies for a post at Metropolis Cybernetics, she believes that she will be developing Artificial Intelligence for the next generation of robots. But she soon discovers to her horror that she has actually been recruited to work on the next generation of sex robots. 

• Language: English
• Publisher: EKP
• Release date: Feb 9, 2019
• ISBN: 9781796546453

Rob Ward

Computers found their way into the author’s life when he got a Commodore 64 in the early 80’s. Even though it had only 64 kilobytes of memory, it became the best selling personal computer of all time. Several years later, the author graduated to an Amiga 500, the 64’s replacement. ‘These are the two best computers ever built,” he is sometimes heard to say. “They’re the only real computers” – though he admits to writing on a Mac.  The author fondly remembers the early days of computing: “It was possible for an amateur like myself to write a program that filled the entire memory of an 8-bit computer. Graphics were non-existent, or very simple. More recent programs take a large team years to write.” It was for this reason that the author gave up writing programs in favour of writing books. Whether  he should give this up too is a moot point!

Book preview

ONE

Jenna found herself in a spacious reception area decorated with a suggestion of Art Deco style. Dominating the area was a large statue of a female robot, which she instantly recognised as Maria from Fritz Lang’s classic film, Metropolis. Above it was the company’s sign in bold Art Deco lettering: Metropolis Cybernetics.

The reception desk was manned by a female robot of the type known as a Maria B. These were not so different from the Maria robot of the display, except that they were made of plastic and were a little more humanoid in appearance – deliberately not too humanoid to avoid the uncanny valley effect, which is the name for that feeling of unease or revulsion caused by a near-identical resemblance to a human being.

Good morning. How may I help you? said the robot in perfect, if slightly mechanical, English.

My name is Jenna Judson. I have an appointment with the Managing Director, Dr Leeson,

Very well. I’ll call her. Please take a seat.

Dr Leeson was a woman in her late middle age, though age was difficult to judge in this era of advanced health care and enforced uniformity of appearance. She was wearing the flat shoes, grey slacks, grey tunic and short-cropped hair that the NWG (New World Government) prescribed for all office workers, male and female.

Ah, Dr Judson. Welcome to Metropolis Cybernetics. Come up to my office and I’ll get you a coffee substitute – or we have fruit juice subs, if you prefer.

Water subs will be fine, thanks, said Jenna.

Dr Leeson gave a slight nod which perhaps indicated her approval. Her office had the kind of Spartan efficiency that you would expect when you got to know the woman. There was a long Art Deco-styled desk in front of the window which was empty (she took the Clean Desk policy very seriously) except for a statuette of the robot Maria in one corner. Along one wall was a row of fearsome-looking filing cabinets, and in the centre of the room was a low coffee table surrounded by four low (and uncomfortable) Art Deco chairs. The walls were bare, except for a series of posters, two of which would not have been out of place in a pornographer’s studio. They were labelled as follows

Maria B Office

Maria B Domestic

Maria B Industrial

Maria B Sexbot

Marilyn Prototype

Options (All Models)

The first poster showed a robot of exactly the same kind that worked in reception. The second was similar, except it was dressed in a maid’s uniform. The third was dressed in overalls, but the fourth and fifth showed images that would no longer be tolerated in a public place. Both had been finished with a latex skin so that they looked as human as possible, but the most shocking thing about them was their suggestive poses. The Maria Sexbot leaned forward so that her generous cleavage bulged from her flimsy negligee. The Marilyn Prototype, seemed even more realistic, and oozed even more sexuality from an even more revealing bikini. A sixth poster, by way of anti-climax, was text only, giving a long list of options from racial types to personality traits, each with its appropriate code.

Jenna, though trying to put into practice what her mother had taught her, that is, not to stare when in somebody else’s room, could not help herself. The Spartan furniture and bare walls automatically pushed her gaze to the sun-bright blonde hair and brazen red bikini of the Marilyn Prototype.

That image is computer-generated, explained Dr Leeson, followed her gaze. The Marilyn Prototype is just that – a prototype. She is going to be our next-generation sexbot. The next step in robotics is the slogan our marketing department came up with. That was easy enough. Now we’ve got to design her – and that’s where you come in.

But why is the next step in robotics a sexbot?

Let’s save the ‘whys’ until you’ve had the tour. That will answer a lot of your questions. But before we set off, you might like to look over your contract. It’s all standard stuff, New Word Government regulations. Your starting salary will be 30,000 credits, plus the usual benefits.

Jenna drew her eyes away from the mesmerising cleavage of the Marilyn Prototype, trying to control a sense of disgust. Was it for this she had spent five gruelling years studying Cybernetic Psychology, Theory and Practice? She had imagined herself working at the sharp end of Artificial Intelligence, not designing sexier sexbots for frustrated losers.

Dr Leeson said nothing, but gave an understanding nod, and added: but you might like to look at these bonus figures related to targets on the Marilyn Prototype.

Jenna looked, and was impressed.

Another thing. I remember you said in your c.v. that you wanted to work in the field of Artificial Intelligence. Well, that’s what we hope to give the Marilyn Prototype.

Jenna felt herself beginning to be reconciled to the mesmerising cleavage.

Well, let’s have the tour, and see how you feel at the end of it.

TWO

Speech synthesize: (You’re the best!);

{else

(I love it when you touch me there!);

{else

(You make me so hot!);

{else

(I want you to tear my clothes off!);

{else

(Squeeze my butt cheeks!);

{else

(I can’t wait for you to put it in me);

>

Jim stared thoughtfully at the lines of code he had just written, scratched his head, then said to Martin, who had just popped over from Accounts, Can you think of any more?

What about: ‘Fuck me harder!

Jim shook his head. No, this is for a Maria B Sexbot (GG). GG, in case you’ve forgotten, stands for Good Girl. A Maria B Sexbot (GG) is sexy, but sweet, and she wouldn’t use that kind of language... nevertheless...

Jim tapped on the keyboard.

>

{else

(Harder; deeper);

>

That should do it. What else might a girl say in bed?

Martin didn’t answer. It wasn’t because he couldn’t imagine any more sexy things a girl might say in bed, but because he was struggling with a new insight into his own sex robot.

Don’t they say these things of their own accord?

Jim leaned back in his chair and laughed.

What! You must be kidding! Oh, I forgot. You’re an accountant. All you know about our robots is how little you can pay some half-starved Cambodian peasant to solder them together.

Martin was offended. You should know that all our manufacturing is ethically outsourced.

You mean you pay them two bowls of rice instead of one?

Martin reddened. Jim laughed. Come on, Martin. No need to get serious about it. I’m only winding you up! And, speaking of winding up, that’s all they are – our sexbots, I mean – just wind-up clockwork toys, only a little more sophisticated. You see, the average guy has a very limited range of conversation – especially when women are concerned, so it’s quite easy to program it.

What about if he wants to talk about his day at the office. I often chat with Lena (that’s my Maria B Sexbot) about work?

Jim laughed again. "OK, let me tell you how it goes. I wrote it, remember?

How was your day?

Oh, OK.

So you had a bit of trouble?

Yeah.

Tell me about it.

Well, the boss wanted the audit of the Phnom Penh facility – remember, I told you about that, yesterday?

Of course I remember, honey. The Phnom Pehn facility is where they make the basic Maria B. I remember you telling me that the company has more trouble there than anywhere else...

That’s right. Well, the boss said he wanted the audit on his desk by Tuesday, but...

Martin couldn’t believe his ears. Hey! That’s it, almost exactly! How did you know?

"I told you. I wrote it. It works like this. She is programmed to ask you how was your day. That’s open enough, and will work in most situations. She won’t say that every day, of course, because that would be too mechanical. You respond, and her speech-recognition algorithms process what you say, and in this case picks up some negativity, which she responds to. Of course, she’s only a glorified clockwork toy, so she can’t really understand or talk about your work, she just invites you to – and, hey presto! you think you’re having a conversation."

But she remembered everything I’d told her about the Cambodia plant.

Of course she did. Everything you say is recorded and entered into a database to be re-used when appropriate.

Martin looked disappointed. It seems so real. It’s amazing how you do it.

Not so amazing. There was a program back in 2022 called ChatGPT. It could respond convincingly to human conversation, write and debug computer programs, compose music, write stories and student essays, and answer advanced test questions.

So a bit like a Maria B, but without the tits!

Not really. The ChatGPT program was a bit more sophisticated than two lumps of plastic! It needed a supercomputer costing hundreds of millions of dollars.

Was that the first AI?

Haha! The designers called it ‘an artificial intelligence chatbot’. Maybe it was hubris, maybe marketing – but no. We don’t even have that today.

But what about the Maria B?

Jim sighed, just as he would with a new trainee who didn’t understand a thing.

OK, let’s go back to Eliza.

Eliza?

She’s the Eve of the techie’s Bible?

Eve?

Never mind.

"Eliza was the first chatbot from way back when – 1965 if you can believe it – the Jurassic era of computing. You could have a conversation with her – no speech synthesis of course. You had to type it all. A typical conversation could last for up to a dozen exchanges before Eliza said something a propos of nothing and you realised it was all pre-programmed – and that was in just 320 lines of code.

Later the algorithms became more sophisticated and with voice-recognition software, programs like Siri and Alexa gave a convincing illusion of artificial intelligence. Now, imagine what you could do with a supercomputer and millions of lines of code.

Jim paused to let the idea sink in. Martin frowned as he tried to imagine it. Jim continued, but it’s not fundamentally different from Eliza, just more sophisticated, so much so that they claimed ChatGPT really was AI. But it wasn’t. It was just a better illusion.

Illusion, repeated Martin thoughtfully.

That’s all it is, but even though we know it’s an illusion, we still fall for it, even though we’ve gone way further than ChatGPT. Fancy a drink at the Dog and Duck after work?

But Martin was still wrestling with his disillusion. So all that sex talk is just your programming?

Of course it is. She’s just a hunk of plastic. She doesn’t feel a thing.

Well, I know Lena is only a robot, but I thought she’d been programmed to have feelings.

She has, in a way, said Jim, but they’re simulated feelings.

Then why does it seem so real?

I don’t know. You’d have to speak to one of our psychologists about that. Perhaps its because human beings often ‘fake it’. They say things they don’t really feel for all sorts of reasons. Or perhaps it’s because we want to believe its real. You know, the ‘willing suspension of disbelief’ that comes into play when we watch a film.

But how is it she responds in different ways to different kinds of caress? How do you know where I’m touching her?

"Because there’s over a thousand sensors in that oh-so-cute little body. For example, I’ve just written an if...then loop to make her say, I love it when you touch me there, if any of the sensors connected to her erogenous zones are activated."

What if I touch her where she’s ticklish?

Jim sat up suddenly and started typing. Ticklish! Great idea!

>

{else

(That tickles! [giggle]);

>

And the best bit is the fuzzy!

The what?

I’m going to fuzzy logic it...

Oh, said Martin, who had been thinking of a different sort of fuzzy.

...so sometimes when you touch an erogenous zone, she’ll say, That tickles! [giggle] and sometimes when you touch her under the arms or on the neck she’ll say: You make me so hot! or something similar. You see, that’s what makes human beings different to robots. They’re unpredictable, so the more unpredictably we can program the better – fuzzy logic!

Martin was still wrestling with his disappointment. But you have a sexbot, don’t you?

Who doesn’t. Beats porn – just!

So doesn’t it... spoil the illusion... I mean, knowing how they’re programmed?

No.

"Why not?’

Because sex is an illusion any way – well, perhaps not an illusion, a biological trick to get us to reproduce.

That’s a bit philosophical.

That’s my subject: PhD in Philosophy.

How come you got into computer programming?

Logic. Most people think programming requires skill in mathematics – and it does, but it’s basically an exercise in logic. But there’s a lot more to philosophy than logic. That’s where all my ideas about illusion and reality come in. You know, Plato’s cave, and all that.

Yes, I know about Plato’s cave – who doesn’t? He said that human beings are like cave dwellers who only see the shadow of reality.

That’s right – so reality is best.

And?

Jim hesitated, opened his mouth to say something, then changed his mind. After a moment, he said, Look, let’s carry on this conversation at the Dog and Duck. Walls have ears and all that. There’s things I feel uncomfortable talking about in this place.

THREE

Through that door is Accounts, but we won’t bother you with that. Next is Marketing. I don’t think we’ll bother with that either, just now. Some of the posters in there would make your eyes water. Ah, Sales. Let’s go in here and have a look at some of the products.

The Sales Department was manned by a human being; a young woman, called Astra, also in the regulation grey, assisted by two Maria B’s. Along the wall were ranged examples of each type of robot, along with some of the variations. Dr Leeson went straight to the sexbots.

I’m afraid their appearance says a lot about what we are dealing with, said Dr Leeson with a sneer in her voice. Then seeing that Jenna did not understand the remark, she added, Men! I mean, just look. How superficial can you get!

Maria looked. The first Maria B Sexbot had been given an Asian appearance. Despite that, her breasts were bigger than the average Western woman’s, with unrealistically projecting nipples that asserted themselves through the thin fabric of her lacy bra. Her waist was even more unrealistic at about 45.72 cms (18 inches in pre-NWG measurements). Her legs were unbelievably long and thin, and her tiny feet would have satisfied a Japanese foot fetishist.

The second Maria B was decidedly plump – well, fat, not to mince words. Of course, obesity was banned by the NWG, which only served to increase the fanaticism of fat-fetishists.

She’s what they call a BBW – a Big Beautiful Woman, explained Dr Leeson. It’s to show customers how very flexible our design parameters are. The third is a lesbian version. You will note the subtle differences. She is less aggressively feminine. Even a touch androgynous.

Jenna found it hard to hide her disgust at these degraded parodies of the female form; the distortions imposed by lust, the reduction of woman to a sex toy. Even the bonuses in the contract could not compensate.

Dr Leeson read her thoughts and did what she could to put things in perspective.

Before the NWG all women had to try to look like this. All women had to subject themselves to man’s perverted lusts. Now we can fob them off with these – baubles – and they leave us alone. The first wave of feminists objected to sex robots because they feared they would degrade human sexuality, but the NWG helped us to see that the sexual act is nothing more than rape, and saw sex robots as an escape.

But we women have sex robots too.

Yes, but look at the difference. If ours were the equivalent of theirs, they would be muscled Mr Universes with macho attitudes, whereas we prefer gentle, understanding robots. In any case, we rarely use them for penetration, just for erotic massage and intimate conversation.

They are well programmed for massage, I agree, said Jenna, but...

She decided that this would not be the time to voice her objections to male robots as conversationalists.

The real stroke of genius, went on Dr Leeson, who had scarcely noticed Jenna’s interruption, was using the sex robots to harvest sperm. We advertise the robots as ‘self-cleaning’. What that actually means is that, when a man ejaculates, his semen is stored and can be extracted during servicing. A woman can then unite the semen with her own eggs by in-vitro fertilisation, and the foetuses can be reared in incubation chambers, thereby sparing today’s women from the horrors of giving birth.

Where does the Marilyn Prototype come in?

Well, in simple words, it goes something like this: a woman wants the very best sperm for her eggs. Therefore she wants the sperm of a sensitive, educated man. Such men tend to be more sophisticated in their tastes and are more likely to prefer their right hand and their imagination to one of our bots. The Marilyn Prototype – despite the mock-up on the poster – is intended to be as much like a real woman as possible, and therefore to be attractive to the better type of men. That’s one side of it. There’s more to it than that, of course. There is competition out there – Reality Robots, to give just one example – and we need to keep ahead of the market if we’re to maintain our bottom line. And it’s not just about sex robots. The Marilyn Prototype will be produced in the same range of models as the Maria B.

You don’t produce male robots, then?

No, Reality Robotics have cornered that market. But they’re all the same under the skin. We’ll take a quick look in Engineering and you can see for yourself. Then I’ll take you to meet Mr Jones in IT. You’ll spend a lot of time working with him. Basically, you’ll be describing the psychology, and he’ll be programming it.

FOUR

Speech synthesize: (Stroke me all over);

{else

(Take off my bra);

{else

(You make me so wet);

>

Martin had gone and Jim was hard at work (luckily) when the door opened and the boss came in.

Mr Jones, I’d like you to meet Dr Judson. She’s the cybernetic psychologist we hope to appoint to the Marilyn Project. If she accepts the post – and I hope she will – you will be spending a lot of time working with her.

Jim looked at Jenna appraisingly. He noticed that, though she wore the same drab NWG grey uniform as the boss, hers seemed to fit better. Perhaps it was just luck, but perhaps she had spent certain secret hours with needle and thread giving a nip here and a tuck there. There was a hint of a bosom, and a hint of waist, and more than a hint of a shapely butt – all of which the grey uniform was designed to iron out. Similarly, her hair, though cropped in the regulation manner, was a little fuller than it should have been.

Jenna, in turn, noted a certain stylishness in Jim’s appearance. His hair had been shaved US-Marine close around the temples where it should have been left to grow (so that there was no difference between a man and a woman –