Kid Jokes

By Jolly Jayesh

Laughter is as essential for us as breathing is. Life becomes a big boredom without humour. Whatever be the merits of today’s busy and hectic life, it certainly has taken away laughter from our lives. Mental breakdowns we see around are proofs of it.

This ‘Jokes E-book’ of ours is an effort to dissolve your tensions in a solution of smiles, chuckles and laughter. We earnestly believe that our collections of hilarious jokes will displace your worries and gloom with lots of Ha-Ha’s.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Publishdrive
• Release date: Feb 11, 2019

Book preview

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About the Book

Laughter is as essential for us as breathing is. Life becomes a big boredom without humour. Whatever be the merits of today’s busy and hectic life, it certainly has taken away laughter from our lives. Mental breakdowns we see around are proofs of it.

This ‘Jokes E-book’ of ours is an effort to dissolve your tensions in a solution of smiles, chuckles and laughter. We earnestly believe that our collections of hilarious jokes will displace your worries and gloom with lots of Ha-Ha’s.

—Author

Table of Contents

About the Book

Chapter—6

Chapter—8

Chapter—1

A teacher of chemistry wanted to teach his 10th-grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey and two worms.

Now, class, observe closely the worms, said the teacher putting a worm first into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be.

The second worm, he put into the whiskey. It writhed painfully, and quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail.

Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment? the professor asked.

Madam, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded, Drink whiskey and you won’t get worms.

**********

Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, Why is the bride dressed in white?

Because white is the colour of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life, her mother explained, keeping it simple.

The child thought for a moment and said, So why is the groom wearing black?

**********

Jimmy came home from school with an F on his geography test. His mother was reviewing his work and noticed that he had gotten one particularly easy question wrong.

Jimmy, she asked, Santa Cruz is in California.

No, it isn’t. It doesn’t exist.

Of course it exists. What makes you think it’s imaginary?

That’s what you told me, Mummy, the boy replied.

When did I tell you that?

Last Christmas, when I wanted to know why I didn’t get a horse.

No, I told you that Santa Claus doesn’t exist, not Santa Cruz.

**********

A preacher was making his rounds to his parishioners on a bicycle when he came upon a little boy trying to sell a lawnmower.

How much do you want for the mower? asked the preacher?

I’m just trying to make enough money to buy a bicycle, said the little boy.

After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked, Will you take my bike in trade for it?

The boy said, You got a deal.

The preacher took the mower and tried to crank it. He pulled on the string a few times with no response from the mower.

The preacher called the little boy over and said, I can’t get this mower to start.

The little boy said, That’s because you have to cuss at it to get it started.

The preacher said, I’m a minister, and I can’t cuss. It’s been so long since I’ve been saved that I don’t know if I even remember how to cuss.

The little boy looked at him happily and said, Just keep pulling on that string. It’ll come back to you!

**********

Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms Smith, the Sunday School teacher, smiling sweetly said, Bobby, when I was a child I was told if that I made ugly a face, it would freeze and I would stay like that.

Bobby looked up and replied, Well, Ms Smith, you can’t say you weren’t warned.

**********

A group of third, fourth and fifth graders accompanied by two female teachers went on a field trip to the local racetrack to learn about thoroughbred horses and the supporting industry.

During the tour, some of the children wanted to go to the toilet so it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.

**********

As the teacher assigned to the boys waited outside the men’s toilet, one of the boys came out and