Philip Collyer vs the Cola Thief

By Amy Rae Durreson

When Phil's lunchtime drink starts vanishing from the office fridge, he's determined to catch the culprit. As the thief starts leaving him cheeky messages, Phil enlists the help of Kester, the cute IT guy he's been crushing on for months. Can Phil get his man? And catch that pesky thief too?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Amy Rae Durreson
• Release date: Aug 15, 2019
• ISBN: 9781999744618

Amy Rae Durreson

Amy Rae Durreson is a quiet Brit with a degree in early English literature, which she blames for her somewhat medieval approach to spelling, and at various times has been fluent in Latin, Old English, Ancient Greek, and Old Icelandic, though these days she mostly uses this knowledge to bore her students. Amy started her first novel a quarter of a century ago and has been scribbling away ever since. Despite these long years of experience, she has yet to master the arcane art of the semicolon. She was a winner in the 2017 Rainbow Awards.

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PHILIP COLLYER VS THE COLA THIEF

AMY RAE DURRESON

Copyright Amy Rae Durreson 2019

Smashwords edition

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Table of Contents

About This Book

Philip Collyer vs the Cola Thief

Other books by Amy Rae Durreson

About the Author

About This Book

Philip Collyer vs the Cola Thief was first released in Dreamspinner Press's Closet Capers anthology in 2013.

PHIL tried to be a decent manager. He never wanted to be one of those guys who enjoyed making their staff feel worthless, so he took the time to listen to his people, even when he privately thought they were complaining about nothing. (He couldn't change the rotation of the earth to stop the sun from shining in the windows, could he? All he could do was order thicker blinds, and he was sorry that spoiled the view, really he was, Sharleen.) He bought good coffee for the staff kitchen, signed any reasonable leave requests (and the odd unreasonable one when he was faced with tears, because being gay didn't mean he could cope with weeping women, whatever his friends thought), bought the first round every Friday, and always made sure they had a designated driver before he chose his own drink. He'd even been known to crawl around the back of a broken photocopier or help the IT minions heft equipment back to their basement.

But there was one thing he could not be nice about, one thing that drove him beyond all reason.

Phil needed caffeine to get through the day. Breakfast was strong milky tea, followed by coffee at his desk to start the morning, the first cup from the organic café by the bus stop, and then from the kitchenette at the far end of the floor midway through the morning and twice in the afternoon. Lunchtime, though, was for cola. Phil loved it: the cool metal sheen of the can, the first shock of it against his tongue, the sudden shiver of energy crackling through him as the sugar and caffeine hit his system. Sometimes he started his lunch break with it; other times, he waited, letting the anticipation build until he couldn't bear it and had to crack open the communal fridge and reach for his precious can.

Except today, it wasn't there.

Someone had stolen his cola.

He had to close the door and reopen it a few times to check. Then he emptied everything out of the fridge, desperately hoping it had just been moved to the back. But it was still missing, and he began to shove everything back in randomly, swearing more loudly with every cup of yogurt and little Tupperware box of sandwiches.

Hey, are you okay?

Phil recognized the voice, but for once didn't care.

Reviews for Philip Collyer vs the Cola Thief

[F · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Can't say that liked everything about it. For me, making such a "mistake" ( being a controlling "nice guy") would be enormous red flag. Otherwise, would be a cute short story but left me disturbed.

[Christy Cowart · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Sweet, funny novella...ticks all the boxes. Loved everything about it.