Tribal Abundance: Living Courageously in an Uncertain World

By Ildikó Oravecz

Have you ever felt powerless and alone...at work? In moments where it feels like betrayal or injustice has occurred, it can be difficult to know how to act, what to say, or how to think. Yet it's how we respond to those moments that shapes our destiny.
 
Following Ildikó Oravecz's journey, which began in apartheid-era South Africa and took her in the direction of Hungary and New Mexico, you will absorb and witness the evolution of the core messages of her Tribal Abundance® philosophy--listen to your gut, build a culture you believe in, and maintain a posture that promotes life and work enrichment. You'll also learn to apply this wisdom for finding your tribe, working as a tribe and having an abundance mindset that transcends all thoughts of scarcity.
 
Finding your tribe is powerful. And now in your hands lies the tool and perspective to shift towards living a life of Tribal Abundance. Whether you're dissatisfied with your current employment or you're not living your life to its highest potential, embracing Tribal Abundance will help you surround yourself with the supportive and collaborative tribe necessary to live human life to its fullest and achieve your ultimate personal and professional goals.​

• Language: English
• Publisher: Citrine Publishing
• Release date: Feb 22, 2019
• ISBN: 9781947708747

Book preview

Tribal Abundance

Praise for Tribal Abundance

"Ildi’s story is one for all of us—growing up navigating various ideas about how to manage self, family, and work, and ultimately realizing that how we choose to approach each other creates both our results and our reality. Tribal Abundance is an easy read, a great conversation starter, and a solid reminder that most of our significant accomplishments and experiences happen when we’re in connection."

—Ed Muzio, Best-selling author of Iterate: Run a Fast, Flexible, Focused Management Team

Ildikó is the authentic version of tribal abundance. She defines ‘the new normal’ in a way you can find your place, your connection and your community. She finds a way to make it safe to face your fears and feel a sense of belonging and connection. 

—Kim Nugent, Ed.D., CEO and best-selling author of Promotion Protocol: Unlock the Secrets of Promotability & Career Success

"Sometimes in life, you meet people who light up your life. Ildi is one of those people. Compassionate, with boundless talent and enthusiasm, in her first book Tribal Abundance: Living Courageously in an Uncertain World, she has shared her essence with a much larger world. Now, more will know about her and see how courageously she shares her life with others."

—Nancy Mills, Founder, TheSpiritedWoman.com

Ildikó Oravecz is the embodiment of Tribal Abundance. Nothing demonstrates this better than a recent encounter where a coach in Ildi’s immediate space sought accreditation in a motivational tool that Ildi uses widely and often differentiates her work, called PRINT ®. When asked if she was comfortable with the prospect, her response was, ‘more PRINT ® coaches = more awareness of PRINT ® = more folks wanting PRINT ® = more work and business for ALL of us.’ Unlike the zero-sum mentality that many exhibit, Ildi’s courage, positivity, and trust are exemplary and invigorating. I can testify firsthand, she practices what she preaches. She is a shining example of the fulfillment and success attainable when one lives by the principles of Tribal Abundance.

—Dr. Paul Hertz, President, The Paul Hertz Group, Co-Creator of PRINT ®

Ildi offers up a full plate of delightful stories and reflective experiences, and then finds a way to anchor them to a practical roadmap for leading a more beautiful life… a must-read for tapping into your own abundant heart.

—Katie K. Snapp, Founder, Skirt Strategies: Training and Encouragement for Women in Leadership

From the heart of a little girl to the depths of a grown woman, Ildikó Oravecz sheds light on the power of connection, the roots of segregation, and the impact of both in our lives. Through her journey from South Africa to Hungary to the United States, and finally home to life's greatest meaning, she reveals the art of finding one's tribe, one's sense of community, and one's authentic self through the wisdom of Tribal Abundance.

—Chloe Rachel Gallaway, Author of The Soulful Child: Twelve Years in the Wilderness

If you have ever struggled with feeling like there is ‘not enough,’ then this is the book for you. Ildikó not only defines Tribal Abundance, she demonstrates what it means to find your tribe and have an abundance mindset. This book will guide you towards the understanding that there is always more than enough. Ildikó has a way of making people feel like they belong. Ildikó​ herself represents what it means to be Tribally Abundant. She is one of the most kind, authentic, and welcoming people I know. This book is her way of sharing her gift with others so they too can feel connected and find their place in the world.

—Yvonne Williams Casaus, Registered Play Therapist and best-selling author of A Drop of Water: A Spiritual Journey

Tribal Abundance

Living Courageously in an Uncertain World

Ildikó Oravecz

Citrine Publishing

Contents

Foreword

Preface

Introduction

THE PRINCIPLES

1. Loneliness Is Not the Same as Being Alone

2. The First Step is Always the Hardest

3. I Want to Play Bigger

4. Finding Your Tribe

5. Finding Your Home

6. Disorientation

7. A New Normal

8. Language Connects Us to Our Tribe

9. Going Home

10. Having a Calling

11. Where Do You Belong?

12. Finding Connection

13. Finding Your Place

14. Connection and Community

15. Facing Fear Is the Way Out

16. Foundational Framework

THE PROGRAM

17. Tribal Abundance—The Start of a Better Way

18. Learning Life Lessons

19. The Tribal Abundance Model

20. Abundance vs. Scarcity Mindset

21. Tribal Culture vs. Individualistic Culture

22. Communication Through a Trust-Based vs. Fear-Based Lens

23. T – Taking Stock and Building a Tribe

24. R - Rapport

25. I - Implement

26. B - Blind Spots

27. A - Abundance, Encouragement, and Gratitude

28. L – Legacy

THE PRACTICE

29. Battle of the Mind

30. Going Home

31. Connection

32. The Opposite of Separation

33. Learning to Trust

34. Bringing It Home

Appendix A: Tribal Abundance Quotient Assessment

Appendix B: What If You Hate Your Job?

Appendix C: Resources and References

Appendix D: The Tribal Abundance Program

Endnotes

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Publisher’s Note

Copyright © 2019 by Ildikó Oravecz. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations included in critical articles and reviews. For information, address [e-mail]. To contact the author, visit www.HighPerformanceConsulting.com or www.TribalAbundance.com.

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Limit of Liability/Disclaimer of Warranty: While the publisher and author have used their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations or warranties with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this book and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for well-being. In the event you use any of the information in the book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and publisher assume no responsibility for your actions. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher.

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Author Photo by Sarah Crichlow, sarahstella.com

Cover Design by Lila Romero

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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

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Oravecz, Ildikó

Tribal Abundance: Living Courageously in an Uncertain World

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p. cm.

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Paperback ISBN: 978-1-947708-72-3

Ebook ISBN: 978-1-947708-74-7

Library of Congress Control Number: 2019932435

First Edition, February 2019

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Citrine Publishing

Asheville, North Carolina, USA

(828) 585 - 7030

www.CitrinePublishing.com

To my first tribe, my parents

Foreword

With great opportunity comes fear. And so it is for the human being, standing soaked in a cloak of toxicity…waiting for the cleanse of abundance to find us.

Having not known what it was like to truly be accepted and feel close to friends, I ran like a frightened child when the opportunity to connect with others presented itself. I pretended to connect. I smiled, I nodded. I had many friends…and I kept them all at arm’s length. All of them. Yes, this was fine. This was safe. But if you asked me to go deeper, I froze. I simply didn’t know how to connect with people, and the fear of learning was so great that it was easier to let the opportunity pass me by. Stuck in a fog of illusion, I didn’t know what it meant to move. This was my life.

This picture changed for me in 2012. They say we all have a threshold that, when crossed, changes everything. I was standing just past that line. Having lost my closest ally, my only sibling, Tina, to sepsis two years prior, I had only a handful of relationships in which I felt comfortable enough to relax and let down my guard (and I was either married to the person or related by blood). I could no longer survive in this gated world that I had built for myself. Something had to change. And so, feeling sheer terror, I did the opposite of what I was conditioned to do. I closed my eyes and I moved. I walked into a world that was totally foreign to me. I dove head first into a world of deep connection.

Seven years have passed since then and so much has changed. It’s a good thing we can only see the next two-hundred feet of our journey, because courageous living is a scary ride. I’ve fallen more times than I can count. I’ve embarrassed myself. I’ve made a lot of mistakes. And still people come. They come not in spite of my imperfections, but to my surprise, more likely because of them. They come because a true family—or as Ildikó calls it, a tribe—attracts authentic people. People who understand abundance comes in many forms. People who are grateful for life and all the parts of it. People who own their perfect imperfections like a badge of honor and pride. The more you show yourself as you truly are, the more you receive. It took me a long time to learn that lesson. Once you learn it, there’s no going back.

What I can tell you is that every single moment has been worth it. The rough moments, the times I wanted to run back to the safety of disconnection, the times I fell face first…they all changed my life. If you are courageous enough to find a truly authentic and abundant-minded tribe, yours will most certainly change too.

Part of my journey to finding my tribe included meeting Ildikó in 2016. The first time we shook hands, I stared in amazement as her eyes smiled brighter than her teeth. At that moment, I knew she was going to be an important part of my life. Ildi is special in so many ways and one of them is that she gets the term tribe on a different level. She not only gets it, she lives it. Ildi speaks with integrity, with honesty, and with kindness. She brings people together and while connecting others, she also connects people to herself. A perfect circle of abundance.

I have seen Ildi change so many lives. I know her presence in my life has certainly changed mine. I am excited for you as you begin this incredible journey with her in this crash course of how Tribal Abundance ® can change your life, both professionally and personally.

I feel certain that if you stay open and are courageous enough to raise the standard of what you will accept from your tribe, that your circle, your dreams, your confidence, and your connection to the world will explode in a direction you never dreamt possible. It’s time to go there and this book can help you make your move. Walk courageously, walk optimistically, walk confidently into abundance. I applaud you.

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With respect and gratitude,

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Shannon Crotty

Founder/CEO Polka Dot Powerhouse

Preface

The Tribal Abundance ® concept was something that was birthed over many years of experience. The idea of having an abundance-based mindset is not new, but the way I have put together ideas and actions into a cohesive plan certainly is. My desire is that, in reading this book, your mind is opened to the possibilities of living life in a different way.

I have included some examples from many different times in my life along with the foundational principles and structure of the Tribal Abundance ® program. This is a very personal journey for me as I believe we are integrated beings who don’t split into a work self and a personal life self. Rather, we are who we are whether we are at work, at home, or anywhere else. And so, as you read, you’ll see the overlaps between my personal experiences and work/client examples, as well as learnings and summaries from some of my favorite books.

The most recent Gallup State of the American Workplace Report (2017) provides valuable insight into how engaged (or not) employees are at work. Over half of American workers are not engaged, while 16% are actively disengaged and miserable; only one-third (33%!) of workers are engaged. We don’t want to be unhappy and disengaged at work: we don’t want the drama, negative conflict, miscommunication, or turmoil. Imagine if you loved going to work and you felt connected and fulfilled there. How would that impact your life?

My hope is that by taking a Tribal Abundance ® approach you will find the freedom to be authentically you, especially in your work teams, in which so many people (about 67% of you!) are unhappy and miserable. Essentially, I hope that when people like you embrace the Tribal Abundance ® concepts and ideas, those statistics will flip around.

Tribal Abundance ® is a registered trademark but to enhance your reading experience during the rest of this book, the trademark symbol has been left off.

Introduction

Lucy

I can feel the warmth of the sun on my back as I sit outside, cross-legged, in the grassy backyard. I can smell the rich soil and hear the leaves being tickled by the wind. I sit with my friend Lucy and we play together, enjoying each other’s company with complete abandon, like only children can.

I first saw Lucy through the wire fence that separated our houses. Lush green plants lined both sides of the fence, covering the wire, but we could still peer through. I saw her bright eyes and big smile and observed that we were about the same height and build. Without understanding how I could be aware of it, I knew that we were about the same