That Christmas Eve

By Mia Ford

"Are you kidding me?" 

He is my brother's best friend?

That hunk of muscle attached to a to-die-for smile and light-my-fire eyes? That billionaire who sizzles my insides every time he says my name?

I didn't have a choice. I got him alone during our Christmas Eve party, and I told him to unwrap his gift. Me.

But Josiah left me with an unexpected gift of his own. A bouncing baby that's the spitting image of him.

I can't believe my family hasn't figured it out.

They think I'm some romance-crazed maniac who can't say no to men.

But Josiah's the only one I've ever really wanted.

And now he's back. And I'm screwed.

Because I still want him. And I know he still wants me.

But bad boys don't want babies, they want babes.

Can I tell him the truth without losing him forever?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Mia Ford
• Release date: Dec 1, 2019
• ISBN: 9781393063995

Book preview

Chapter One – Josiah

The smell of Christmas fills the air. I don’t know what the smell is exactly, I can’t describe it with words, but it’s here, all around me regardless. Or maybe it isn’t the smell, perhaps it’s the atmosphere instead. Everyone gets so excited at this time of the year, and it’s infectious. Even for me, who doesn’t have a family to go home to for the holiday season. That’s something I should be used to, but it still hits me every single year.

This business is incredible, Josiah, my childhood friend, Dax, declares proudly. You are so lucky.

I know I am, I reply quietly. Trust me, this isn’t something that I take for granted.

I inherited Allen Industries, a very successful shipping company from my parents when I hit eighteen years old and was finally old enough to leave the care system. They might have been killed in a car accident when I was three years old, too young to really remember them, but they still left me this. It was run by the same manager that I still have employed on the staff for all those years, and it’s still just as successful right now.

Some of us really hit the nail on the head, huh? Dax smiles and nudges me in the side. I left that orphanarium with nothing and you have this. My parents had nothing in life and I still don’t have it now.

Guilt weighs down on me. I didn’t bring Dax here to show off and now I’m a bit worried that’s how it comes across. When he called, I just told him to meet me here because I thought it would be easier.

So, what are you doing with yourself these days? I ask awkwardly while brushing my shoe on the floor.

I’m working in an office that sells stationary, but to be honest it isn’t a great pay. I just need someone to give me a chance, you know? I might not have the best education in the world, but I’m hard working...

A light bulb pops above my head as an idea that I hadn’t even considered comes to mind. You could come and work here. I need someone to run the admin side of things if you think that would suit you?

Oh no! Dax immediately looks embarrassed. I wasn’t saying it for that.

I know you weren’t. But it’s perfect, isn’t it? I grin at him. And I only like to employ people I trust.

No, but I’m not trying to beg for charity. You don’t have to do this for me, I don’t...

Dax. I sling my arm over his shoulder. Please, will you come and work for me? I need you. You will be doing me a favor. I am not asking you for any other reason than I want you to work for me.

It takes him a few moments, but he eventually bursts out into a grin. Oh, go on then! My Christmas gift.

I chuckle and nod. Well, it’s mine as well. Because I know how good you will be.

I know that I’ve done a really good thing when Dax smiles genuinely at me. Just like I haven’t had the easiest upbringing, he hasn’t either. He was a little older than me when he came into the care system, almost eight years old, but his situation was different. He got taken off his parents because of their excessive drug use. He was virtually neglected. In a terrible state when he turned up. But over time he came out of his shell.

He went back into it when he learned that his mother died when he was fourteen years old and that his father had gone to prison in connection with it. As far as I know, he never wanted to learn any more details than that.

I know my life has been hard, but I still feel like I’m lucky. At least I have all of this.

So, what are your plans for the holiday? Dax asks me sensitively. He knows how hard a question this is. I’ve just been invited to spend time with Violet for Christmas, which I suppose is a good thing.

Wow, things are going really well for the pair of you then! That’s exciting.

Yeah, I think she might be the one, you know? His smile to himself says it all.

I don’t know if I necessarily believe in ‘the one’, but I nod along anyway. It’s definitely rude to say that to someone who is deep in the throne of love. Well, I think I’ll probably have a dinner for one.

Oh no, really? Dax furrows his eyebrows with concern. That’s no good.

Oh, you know me, I’ll be fine. I’ll probably find some party or another to go to.

Oh, to be single. I can tell that Dax is only trying to be nice as he says this. Must be nice.

Hmm yes. Permanently single. That’s me. I grin. Or maybe I haven’t found the right woman yet.

Well, you are only twenty-eight years old, aren’t you? There’s still lots of time.

With that, me and Dax run out of small talk, so it’s time for him to go. He makes his way outside and I follow fairly close behind. We have been on skeleton staff for the last few days, and no one at all but me has been in today. I couldn’t ask any of the staff to come in on Christmas Eve.

Once the door is locked, I stare up at the building I have inherited and count my blessings once more. I really have been set up for life. And although it wasn’t ideal, I came from very humble beginnings, so I appreciate where I am now. Every good thing that happens to me feels amazing. So, my Christmas might be lonely, but at least I have enough money in the bank so that I never ever have to struggle again.

Ring, ring... Ring, ring...

I snatch my cell phone out of my pocket quickly, glad to have someone to talk to. I don’t recognize the number but that doesn’t matter. I get lots of calls that I don’t know where they come from, so I hit answer right away.

Hello, Josiah Allen speaking. I’m formal, just in case I need to be.

Oh, Josiah, hi! a female, giggling voice replies. It’s Charlotte. We met at that underwear party, do you remember? She doesn’t wait for me to answer which is probably for the best. I met a fair few women at that party and actually ended up going home with two of them. Are you up to anything for Christmas?

Er... I don’t know how to answer that. I’m definitely not up for having a meal with someone I don’t know.

We’re having another party. A night wear one this time, but you know us lot. Most of what we wear to bed is lingerie anyway, so it should be really fun. This comes with a lot more giggling which makes me roll my eyes. It would be better if you were there too. A lot of the girls had a good time with you that night.

A party? I wasn’t being serious when I said that to Dax, but now it isn’t the worst idea in the world. Hmm, I don’t see why not. Where is this party? I will see if I can fit it into the schedule.

It’s all day long. Starting at eleven AM and runs until the early hours of the morning. At Annie’s.

That isn’t too far away from mine, so maybe I will find myself there if I end up lonely. Maybe I will.

Just say that Charlotte invited you and you’ll have no trouble getting in.

I bite down on my bottom lip to avoid an outburst. I get in anywhere just based on my name. Sure.

I will make sure that I’m wearing the red lacy piece that you liked so much last time. That probably should clear things up for me, but it doesn’t. I remember a lot of red underwear. Then maybe we can see what happens between me and you. We didn’t get to go home together, did we? That was a big shame...

I tune out the rest of her talking and start to walk. She’s flirting with me, but I’m not really in the mood for it tonight. If I wanted to, I think I could get her to my house tonight in a heartbeat, but I don’t want to be with a stranger. I would rather enjoy my own company, or that of someone I know. I won’t hang up though, just in case I change my mind tomorrow and I do want to go to some party. There’s always a chance.

I think about Dax and his girlfriend, wondering if that would ever be me, but I’m not sure. I don’t know if I’m cut out for commitment and if real love would ever happen for me. I guess some people just can’t...

Oh, my goodness! All of a sudden, I spot my greatest friend ever across the road. Adam Jones. He wasn’t in the care system with me, I went to high school with him, but our bond has always been strong. When the other kids found out that I lived in an orphaniarium, they started to systematically tease me, until he shut them all down with a few short words. His popularity immediately made his words carry weight, and it stopped. We became the best of friends then and have always been friends since. The sort of friends that don’t need to see each other every day to keep up our bond. Charlotte, I have to go. I will see you tomorrow.

I cut off the call and make my way over to Adam with a giant grin on my face. He seems to sense me coming towards him and he turns with a big smile on his face. Hey, Josiah! How are things with you?

He hugs me tight so my answer muffles into the shoulder of his expensive coat. I’m good. How are you?

Adam pulls back and pats me on the shoulder. All good, mate. Same old. Same old. You know how it is. Busy with work. Even at this time of year accounting seems to keep me very busy.

People always need help with their finances, I suppose. Nothing will change that. I glance at all the bags in Adam’s hands. Ooh, you doing a bit of food shopping? Turning all domestic?

Food shopping for Christmas Day. He glances around him as if he fears someone might be listening. But I probably have time for a quick drink if you fancy it? There are nice bars around here, aren’t there?

I nod agreeably. Only the best, which is why I’m glad the office is here. Let’s go.

We head to one of my favorite places which is always warm and has a welcoming atmosphere to it. Lots of professionals drink here, it’s always filled with men in suits, which means they sell the best spirits around. It’s extravagant, but I love the expensive whiskeys here. It isn’t the sort of thing that I thought I would ever be able to afford, but now I can so why the hell not? My parents did leave me the money to spend.

The bartender recognizes me and sends me a wink. We did hook up once when I first started to hang out in this bar, but never again and now she’s just my friend. Daisy is a sweet girl but not for me. Although she starts eyeing up Adam with lust which could turn out to be a very interesting surprise. Who knows?

We order our drinks and take a seat by the table to watch the coldness of the world go by while we sit in the warmth. Adam tucks his bags under the table and leans on it wearily.

I need this, I have to say, Adam gasps. It’s been a very stressful few weeks.

Oh yeah, your family always goes a bit mental over Christmas, don’t they?

Adam rolls his eyes. Oh yes, always. They are terrible for it. But they are worse this year.

Why is that? I sip the drink and relish in the warmth that slides down my throat.

Paisley is finally back from college, to stay this time, so it needs to be a big affair.

I can hardly remember Paisley to be honest, only that she used to wear her red hair in pig tails. She was always around as Adam’s sister, but never in our lives as such. There is a five-year age gap between Adam, me, and Paisley, so she was just too young for us to be bothered with... but I’m sure it will be nice to see her.

Oh, that should be nice... or interesting, I chuckle. Busier than my Christmas anyway.

Hey! You should come to ours for Christmas... if you can handle it.

Thank you for the offer, Adam, and I would be able to handle it, but I don’t think your parents like me.

They do! Adam shoots back, but even he sounds unsure about it. They like you, don’t worry.

No, they don’t. They never have. I haven’t ever been good enough to be your friend.

Even Adam can’t disagree with this. His parents are very strict, orthodox, their whole life is structured. I was always this wild boy who came from the care system and threatened to tear their son off onto the wrong side of the tracks. I suppose it didn’t help that I encouraged Adam to throw a house party once while they were out of town. It was very tame, and nothing got damaged, they might not have even found out if someone hadn’t been stupid enough to try and flush a condom down the toilet. Idiot.

He was banned from spending time with me for a long time then, not that he listened, but I’m sure that ban has been lifted now. We’re nearly thirty years old, we can do what the hell we want.

Let me call Mom now. He pulls out his cell phone. And we’ll see.

I listen to Adam making the call with a grin on my face. I can hear his mother very unsure about the whole thing but also not wanting to come across as rude. I don’t want to impose, but I do want to spend more time with Adam, so if the offer does come around then I think I will take it up. Adam’s family might be cold, but his house is warm, and I do have a lot of good memories there. It would be nice to revisit that.

Right. Adam hangs up the phone and wiggles his finger at me. She said yes so let’s finish up our drinks and go now. You can stay on the floor in my room and stick around for breakfast in the morning.

I suck back the rest of my drink and raise in to a standing position. As Adam leans down to grab his bags I take some of them for him. Helping will be a good start when it comes to his parents.

Let’s stop on the way so I can get a nice bottle of drink... warm your parents up to me.

Good idea. But I do think they will be too distracted by Paisley to notice.

Where did Paisley go to college? What did she study? The more information I have, the easier conversation will flow, I don’t want it to get awkward. She has been gone quite a while, hasn’t she?

Yeah, she has. She did a law degree and something else after that... I can’t remember what exactly. He offers a one shouldered shrug. She might tell us all about it when we get back anyway.

I try hard to place Paisley, but she still isn’t really there. Maybe once I spend a bit of time with her again, everything will become clear. She can’t just be Adam’s younger sister anymore; she must have grown up a lot.

IT TAKES US A WHILE to walk all the way to Adam’s home, but as soon as we get there a wave of nostalgia hits. I still have a good friendship with Adam, but it’s been a very long time since we’ve been here. I let out a little laugh as I think about that party and how fun it was. Tame because we were too scared for his family to find out, but fun all the same. Thinking about it, maybe Paisley was there. It makes a lot of sense since she lived there too.

Are you ready for this? Adam asks with a hint of nerves lacing his tone. You don’t want to back out?

No, I’m ready. I clutch the bottle of posh wine closer to my chest. Let’s do this.

We step inside his home and his mom comes to greet us. She tries to hide the disapproval from her face, but I catch a glimpse of it nonetheless. She really doesn’t want me here. I will have to try and win her around. Adam’s dad follows, and he makes some insane greeting to try and dull the tension from the room.

But I barely hear what he’s saying. Mostly because another woman has appeared behind him, stunning me to the core. A beautiful, slightly familiar red head with a body to die for, legs that go on for days. Curves in all the right places, plump lips that are just begging for a kiss, wide violet eyes that simply draw me in. I gulp down, trying to hide the way my body reacts to her.

Is this Paisley?

Holy hell! I might well be in trouble here.

Chapter Two – Paisley

My eyes widen as I stare in shock at Adam. Well, not so much at Adam, but the man standing behind him. The person who has always managed to make my body react to him in this crazy way. Butterflies that are so big they might as well be birds. My heart fluttering like nuts, my stomach flip flopping, even my toes curl over.

Josiah Allen. My brother’s best friend, the man that I have always had an unattainable crush on.

He was always around, it’s almost like he’s always been a part of this family, but he’s never been like a brother to me. Half because he spent most of my childhood ignoring me, and the other half because as soon as I hit puberty I developed the largest crush on him known to a woman. It was everything, completely all of me. I barely slept, I didn’t eat, he was all that I thought of. He nearly even affected my grades because I was so obsessed.

That dark, shaggy hair, the warm brown eyes, the high cheek bones, and that gorgeous smile. And that’s just his face. His body is incredible too. I caught a glimpse of it once as he stepped out of the shower and I’ve been even deeper in love with him ever since. He is very sculpted, like a God. Or at least he was...

Now, I might not be able to see what’s underneath his clothes, but he looks even buffer than before. Broader, in his charcoal suit jacket, and stronger too. Like he could pick me up and throw me over his shoulder if he wanted. God, I wish he wanted that, seriously. Going to college has done nothing to dull my crush.

I thought it would. I assumed that getting away from home and seeing more of the world, living somewhere new without the restrictions of my parents’ rules would change everything, but it hasn’t. I’m still as obsessed with him as before, and now as we cannot seem to drag our eyes off each other, I wonder if this will ever change.

I dated in college, I spent time with other guys, but something was always missing in them which is why it didn’t last. I couldn’t ever really put my finger on it, but now it’s obvious. It’s this feeling, these sparks, this connection.

I brush my dress down anxiously, wondering how I look. I’m dressed casually because I assumed that it would only be me and my family, but now I feel silly. I don’t have any make up on, my hair is everywhere, I’m a mess. My body has grown into that of a woman and I don’t quite know what to do with it yet.

So, my dad finally says in a gruff, slightly pissed off tone. Shall we get something to drink?

His words are enough to break the magic and I force my eyes away. As I stare at my shoes, my heart pounds so hard it sounds like it’s in my ears. I can barely hear anything other than my own pulse.

Dad leads the way into the kitchen and we all follow, like he’s the pied piper and we don’t have any choice. Josiah hands him a bottle of an incredibly expensive looking wine, and they discuss that for a bit.

Josiah in an expensive suit with posh wine will always be strange to me. I find it hard to put him and the boy from the orphanarium that I fell for all those years ago, into the same box. He had nothing, he was always slightly scruffy with a bit of a chip on his shoulder. He didn’t realize that he had an inheritance coming his way from his parents that he never got to know. Now, he has everything. Money, a successful business, women throwing themselves at him at every opportunity... at least he has according to Adam. I suppose I don’t know for sure.

A twinge of jealousy sticks in my stomach. I’m almost consumed by a shade of green that I don’t like. I don’t know why; it isn’t like this is a new thing. Even in high school once all the teasing was done all the girls wanted him. I didn’t like it then and I guess I still don’t like it now, which is crazy because it isn’t like he will ever be mine. He won’t even notice me now, not when he has the whole world at his feet.

Oh, Paisley! Adam suddenly drags me back into the conversation. I forgot to say this is Josiah. I almost laugh because this introduction is ridiculous. I couldn’t possibly forget him. I know you might remember...

I hold out my hand to him, trying to play it cool. As soon as my hand is out I nearly laugh with how ridiculous this is, being so formal. But Josiah takes mine and he shakes it, sending shock waves of electricity down my arm. My heart starts beating rapidly again. At this rate, I would use up my lifetime of beats in a moment and I’ll drop dead in a moment. I suppose that would be a way to put a stop to all of this...

Hi, Paisley. I feel something swim between us as he says this. A sizzling chemistry. Good to see you.

Yeah, it’s great to see you too. Erm... Shit, I can’t think of anything to say.

Adam says that you have been studying law, he fills in, covering up the blank for me.

Oh right, yeah. Is he interested in me? Why the hell was he asking? I have. I’m done now though.

So, what is next for you? On the job hunt, I suppose.

There is something about the way that he’s looking at me which makes me want to freak out. I have seen him giving other girls this look before, but never me. The girls who have received it have probably always ended up in his bed, and I know why. I completely get it. I almost want to jump into bed with him right now too.

Oh, who the hell am I kidding? There’s no almost about it. I want him badly!

But it’s worse with those eyes. The look makes me feel like I’m the only woman on the planet. The rest of the room vanishes into nothing. It doesn’t even matter that my parents are around, or my brother. Josiah is the only one that matters. I want to swim in his eyes for the rest of my life...

Yes, she will be looking for a job, my mom jumps in determinedly. She needs a job soon.

I resist the urge to roll my eyes. I should be used to the pressure from my family now, I have spent my whole life with it, but I guess a few years apart has changed things and now I can’t live with it in the same way. I will get a job, but Christmas time isn’t the best time to start looking. The new year will bring with it new opportunities. I will get a new job, a place of my own, space to finally be me again...

College has helped me to discover a personality of my own and I can’t wait to live it.

As my eyes meet with Josiah’s again, I think of another reason why living alone would be the best thing ever. If he ever really did want me and this look wasn’t just in my head, we could spend a lot of nights together. Me and him, acting out all the fantasies that I allowed myself only in the dead of night when I was a teenager. His hands all over me, touching me everywhere, his mouth, his steel rod...

I shiver and immediately blush, hoping that no one in the room can read my thoughts. That would be embarrassing. Especially Josiah. He would be the worst person to know what’s on my mind.

I am about to dish up dinner, Mom says, thankfully none the wiser. Why don’t you all take a seat?

I try to choose my chair wisely so that I’m not facing Josiah. I know for a fact that I won’t be able to eat with him looking at me, but after a few switches with him and Adam, for reasons I cannot work out, he ends up next to me which is even worse. My brain races, trying to find ways out of this, but I know I will make too much of a fuss if I move now so I try my hardest to just accept it. To ignore him. Although, how I’m supposed to ignore someone who’s body I am wholly aware of even when he’s across the room from me, is beyond me.

Dinner is hard. Josiah’s knee keeps knocking against mine. I don’t know if it’s accidental or not, but it makes me freak out every single time. One time I even jump so much Adam asks me what’s wrong, and I have to pretend that I thought I felt a spider crawling up my leg. It’s absolutely ridiculous.

Get it together, I curse myself. Stop being weird, you are not a teenager anymore.

But at twenty-three years old, I definitely don’t feel as grown up as I should though. I guess because my childhood was so sheltered and strict, it will take me a little longer than everyone else. College was a good intro though.

After dinner, the drinks keep on flowing. My parents don’t usually drink, but Christmas Eve has always been an exception. It’s probably worse tonight because Josiah is here, and they haven’t ever really liked him, and I am back too, piling on the pressure. Adam seems to be drinking a lot as well, which I think must be due to work stress. It’s only me and Josiah that don’t seem to be able to keep up with everyone else. I can’t drink because the nerves are getting to me and I’m scared that I’ll end up saying something stupid, but I don’t know what his problem is.

Of course, along with the drinks come the board games. Another Jones family tradition. For a long time, I hated the board games. When I was a teenager and I thought I had better things to do but tonight I don’t mind so much. It eases the tension and gives us something to talk about. We are actually all having a laugh!

Oh well, there it is! Dad booms, clearly drunk now. I’m the winner again.

I let you win, Dad. Adam rolls his eyes. Because you complain so much when you lose.

No, you did not. Dad’s eyes flash. I demand a rematch then, and this time don’t let me win...

No, thank you. Mom curls her hand over his shoulder in a way that tells Dad his night is over. They are great at this whole silent communication thing. I think it’s time for bed. We have a big day tomorrow.

Dad parts his lips, almost as if he’s going to argue this point, but he sees the stern expression on Mom’s face and the argument falls away. Even after a night of rare drinking, he knows which rows are worth having. He rises to his feet and says goodnight to all of us, almost stumbling at the bottom of the stairs as he goes.

It isn’t until the three of us stop laughing that a strange awkwardness overcomes me. Maybe it is time for me to leave and go to bed as well, to leave the boys alone. But every fiber within me wants to stay. I don’t want to leave Josiah yet. I know that I might not get to see him again for a very long time.

Hey, we should watch a movie! Adam suddenly slurs. Don’t you think?

I nod eagerly, glad to be included in this plan. It means I don’t have to leave which is perfect. While Adam, sorts out the