O As In Circle - And Other Stupid Things Heard While Filing Claims

By Harriet Adams

In the world of filing auto insurance claims, we've heard it all. Well, almost. This is a compilation of some of the most ridiculous things heard from customers while filing claims. There is also a list of demands that claims filers would like to post to the world for anyone who has the misfortune of having to call their insurance company to file a claim. This is basically a list of what we really wish we could say -- if we weren't on a recorded line, of course.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Jan 29, 2015
• ISBN: 9781312874596

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O As In Circle - And Other Stupid Things Heard While Filing Claims

O as in Circle

(And Other Stupid Things Heard While Filing Claims)

By Harriet Adams

Forward

Several years ago, my family moved out of Chicago after living there for a couple of years. We were pretty much starting anew, and a friend of mine helped me get a job at the company where she worked. The job was filing automobile and homeowner claims for a large insurance company, something I had zero experience in. Although I have a degree in music and generally despise the corporate world, I was truly grateful to have a job, even if it was in a call center. I was even moderately grateful for the change out of education and dealing with bratty kids. (What I didn’t know at that time was that bratty adults are a kazillion times worse.) And like other call center environments, there were your typical call center problems, but then you multiply that with insurance claim problems and general people-are-dumb problems, and that leaves you with a trifecta of why-am-I-here feelings. Whenever you’re in an accident or discover damage to your vehicle, it’s upsetting. No one asks for these things to happen. And everyone handles these situations differently. I understand that. However, in the years that I filed all kinds of claims, I never knew what kind of reaction I was going to run into. One day, I took a claim from a lady reporting the double fatality of her parents, and she kept it amazingly together – only to be followed by a lady who was furious her new Lexus had a scratch the size of a nickel on the quarter panel, insisting it was undrivable in that condition and needed a rental car right away. Then she got irate when I wouldn’t get her into a rental because her definition of undrivable and mine were different. Oh, semantics, you dirty devil.

Our jobs are difficult. We are required to have more than a basic knowledge of insurance in order to file claims correctly; we have to know how the claims program works (several programs, actually) when inputting claim information, and generally how the whole claims process works. There are a number of things we do for the customer, like contact body shops, arrange for an appraiser to go out to see the vehicle, or set up a rental. We also have to understand when we can and can’t do these things and what options are available for different types of policies. Of course, there are also required pieces of scripting we HAVE to say even though the customer doesn’t really care what we’re talking about. We don’t either, but we’ll get in trouble with the legal department if we don’t say it (or in the least, get marked down on the call). And we have to remember that certain states have their own scripting too. On top of all this, we’re also getting calls from people who just need to be transferred somewhere else or are trying to figure out whether their question is claims-related or policy-related. And God forbid our system crashes, and we’re forced to use our backup system that no one seems to ever know how to work.

I don’t think people realize how difficult and absurd they can be when they call in. We try not to take the things morons say seriously because, I mean, they’re morons. We try to brush it off, but it’s like a tapeworm: it eats at you all day. I know our job is to help people, but sometimes people need to meet us halfway. I came up with this list of things that will help callers if they should ever be in the unfortunate situation of filing a claim. In fact, these are things we demand everyone reads and adheres to. Put it under your pillow when you sleep. Take it everywhere you go. These need to be written on your heart with a Sharpie. Or at least tattoo them on your body.

*Please note that some of these things may have just been the way we did things while I was working at my company. It may not be exactly the way other companies handle filing claims. And maybe some of this is just strictly my opinion as well, albeit my opinion is golden. This is just a list of observations based on my experiences. So take from it what you will. That’s all. Don’t send me your hate mail. I barely open my bills.

The Claims Filers’ List of Demands

01: Don’t call while driving.  First of all, there are several states that declare talking on the phone and driving illegal. So, even though your state may not necessarily have laws enacted against it, does it make any sense to call your insurance company to file a claim or check on one while driving? I’m going to have to ask you to write things down, and you can’t do it while driving. I don’t care how well you think you can.

02: Don’t call while cooking.  Seriously. It’s for many of the same reasons above. Do I even have