Pushing Boundaries: Students Remember 30 Years of Wilderness Challenge

By Jerry Barker, Ed.D.

They were mostly inexperienced campers, “raising their hands” to take a big risk, exchanging their comfortable lives for a difficult week of mountaineering. Over 135 college students and alumni tell stories and share memories of teamwork and testing, disappointment and triumph. They pushed their limits, believed in themselves, and took time for personal reflection. Sometimes pain -- sore muscles, altitude sickness, and frozen toes -- seemed insurmountable. Yet in memory, overcoming physical challenges remains a source of great satisfaction.

Persisting when they most want to quit teaches young people to think big. Exhaustion and discomfort can be dispelled by camaraderie and humility. In their futures, finding solutions to tough problems will require truly exceptional leadership. Whether they are called to lead, asked to lead, or forced to lead, all who dared those summits will be better prepared to meet any challenge they will face.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu Publishing Services
• Release date: Aug 28, 2014
• ISBN: 9781483414669

Book preview

Society

PUSHING

BOUNDARIES

Students Remember 30 Years of Wilderness Challenge

Jerry Barker, Ed.D.

Copyright © 2014 Jerry Barker, Ed.D.

Back Cover Author Image: Michael Zirkle

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored, or transmitted by any means—whether auditory, graphic, mechanical, or electronic—without written permission of both publisher and author, except in the case of brief excerpts used in critical articles and reviews. Unauthorized reproduction of any part of this work is illegal and is punishable by law.

ISBN: 978-1-4834-0988-7 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4834-1466-9 (e)

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Lulu Publishing Services rev. date: 08/20/2014

Contents

Acknowledgments

Introduction

Background: A Year Camping With Students

Chapter 1    Butter In My Spaghetti

Chapter 2    The 1986 Wilderness Trip

Chapter 3    The Everglades Trips – 1985, 1987, 1990 & 1991

Chapter 4    Colorado Rockies: 1989-1993

Chapter 5    Why We Do What We Do

Chapter 6    Trip From Hell: Cascade Adventures 1994 & 1996

Chapter 7    North Cascades & Coast Of Washington: 1995

Chapter 8    California’s Sierra Nevada Mountains: 1997 & 1998

Chapter 9    Canyon Country Of Utah: 1999 & 2005

Chapter 10    Difficult And Challenging Days

Chapter 11    Collegiate Peaks Of Colorado: 2000 & 2003

Chapter 12    Mark Wagoner’s Life And Legacy

Chapter 13    Climbing Cascade Volcanoes: 2001 & 2007

Chapter 14    Cloudripper Of The Sierras: 2002 & 2009

Chapter 15    Stepping Up Fourteeners: 2004, 2006, 2012

Chapter 16    Trans-Zion 2008

Chapter 17    Sixty-Two Feet Of Snow! – 2011 & 2013

Chapter 18    Fools In Coyote Gulch: 2010

Chapter 19    Pushing Boundaries: 2014 Oregon And Utah

Chapter 20    Who Raised These Wonderful Students? What My Parents Did Right.

Chapter 21    What Makes Jerry Get Up And Go?

What Shaped And Influenced Jerry?

Alumni Wilderness Trips

Thank You! Host Families

Caldwell Fellows Wilderness Travelers - 1985-2014

Works Cited

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

This book is a collective project, made possible by the contributions of many people. Special thanks go to:

Over 135 NC State University Caldwell Fellows students who submitted their stories and personal reflections about their wilderness experiences. While some only recently participated in this college activity, some now have children older than when they trekked the mountains, so resurrecting those 25 year old memories were more challenging, yet very insightful. Thank you all for sharing your stories.

Gerald Hawkins, the Dean who started it all, encouraging students to Raise your hand. I sincerely thank Dr. Hawkins for developing and nurturing this great leadership program, and for being my mentor over the past 35 years.

Janice Odom, for advancing the wilderness program and expecting each Caldwell Fellow to participate.

To Dr. Lucinda MacKethan, Paul Mobley and Chris Corn for reviewing the manuscript and offering valuable suggestions.

The knowledgeable staff of parks and others who helped us discover the exciting backcountry wilderness areas, campsites and unique natural features that we have experienced and enjoyed.

My wife Sandy for enduring my many days on the trail and hours at the computer, and my family for blessing my life.

Thanks be to God for giving me life, a hunger and respect for the great outdoors, and energetic students as my friends.

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For errors made in telling these Caldwell Fellows wilderness stories, please accept my apologies. To those whose stories are not told here I regret the omissions, but know that they still inspire, are worth telling and are an important part of Caldwell Fellows history.

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Photo credits to Aram Attarian, Jerry Barker, Mark Clapp, Bethany Faulkner, Charlie Harless, Robert Horner, Paul Mobley, Chad Rehder, Tom Stafford, Todd Wagoner, Michael Zirkle

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All royalties will benefit the Mark Wagoner Scholarship Fund

INTRODUCTION

It is unlikely that these two exceptional educators ever crossed paths in their lifetime. However their philosophies of personal growth and leadership development run parallel.

Dr John Caldwell, chancellor of NC State University for sixteen years (1959-75), thought big about the possibilities and lived a life that fulfilled them. "You just don’t know how magnificent you might be. And you do not want to put any limitations on yourself. Think big about your possibilities in this world." He was guided by a deep respect for the potential inside each individual. The other icon was Kurt Hahn, a European educator, a key figure in the development of experiential and adventure education. He was the founder of Outward Bound, promoting hands on learning through outdoor education - "To serve, to strive and not to yield".

The NC State Fellows Program, established in 1968, and the Caldwell Scholars Program, created in 1978 by the NC State Alumni Association to honor the legacy of John Caldwell, merged in 1990 to become the Caldwell Fellows Program. The Caldwell Fellows Program was designed to supplement academic skills, develop leadership skills, and promote a sense of service.

Implementing Kurt Hahn’s philosophy soon became a key component. Since 1985, Caldwell Fellows have participated in an outdoor experience directed by Dr Jerry Barker who became a mentor, coach, advocate, and role-model for hundreds in the program. Long a believer in the value of the outdoor classroom, he began leading student groups, first in an Outward Bound program in Florida and then developing trips to the western states.

Places like South Sister, Elkhead Pass, Coyote Gulch, Sinks Canyon, Cloudripper Peak and Buckskin Gulch became not watering holes in a B western movie but benchmarks for different Caldwell Fellows wilderness teams.

Jerry’s ongoing commitment, energy, and desire challenged young people to think big as well as to grow spiritually and have made him an icon in his own right.

It may be an overuse of the cliché—getting people out of their comfort zone—but for most participants this is certainly one of the goals. I was always impressed by the number of students who had never gone camping or even slept out in the backyard as kids. Experiences related to teamwork, group dynamics, and even going without a shower, preparing trail meals, sleeping on the ground, and yes, maybe climbing Cloudripper Peak all added tremendously to the fiber of each.

A byproduct has also been the development of a corps of participants who have extended their outdoor skills through attending Outward Board programs and those of the National Outdoor Leadership School (NOLS). They have given back by becoming co-leaders on the trail.

On the following pages are a series of personal reflections and comments from a host of alumni wilderness campers! The impact still resonates in the lives of many.

Most of these students have entered (or will enter) the professional world in very diverse areas. Their solutions to problems will require truly exceptional leadership. Whether they are called to lead, asked to lead, or forced to lead–as a result of the wilderness experience and other program opportunities, all will be better prepared to accept the responsibility, opportunity and challenge.

Dr Gerald Hawkins, Director Emeritus

Caldwell Fellows Program

From the current director of the Caldwell Fellows Program

I am not sure what amazes me more:

- The courage and resilience that a new cadre of Caldwell Fellows exhibit each spring as they undertake the Wilderness Expedition challenge

- The leadership and generosity poured out each year by our team of Wilderness Expedition leaders. Led by the ineffable Jerry Barker, these Caldwell alumni, themselves mentored by the Wilderness program, have gone on to earn wilderness leadership credentials and have in turn assumed responsibility to mentor those who come after them.

Thanks to the gift of leadership from Jerry Barker and these alumni leaders, we have been able to send students on a ten-day expedition to one of the magnificent wilderness areas of the western United States for less than $900 per person. Our cost, including airfare, is half the cost of most traditional outdoor adventure programs.

What a privilege to work among people of such dedication and extravagant generosity. Here’s to the 30 years of Wilderness leaders who are the very embodiment of the servant leadership we seek to engender.

Janice Odom, Ph.D.

Caldwell Fellows Director

BACKGROUND: A YEAR CAMPING WITH STUDENTS

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Cooking a great dinner near Zion and Eagle Crags, Utah, 2014: Casey, Halle, Sam and Gino

I have spent over a year of my life traveling & hiking with students, including over 300 nights sleeping on the ground (or on snow). There are just too many stories that need to be shared, so now is the time to tell them and record them for a historical record. The following ‘background’ comments will help give context to the student stories that follow.

These accounts are based around my experiences from travel and on the trails with NC State students, from 1984 through the spring of 2014 -- an Everglades Outward Bound program in 1985, 26 Caldwell Fellows wilderness trips, 14 alum/friends adventure trips, 11 ASB (alternative service break trips over spring break), two CSLEPS trips, two Oxford England summer study abroad months, three Scholars trips, and numerous weekend hiking and climbing trips to Linville Gorge, the Appalachian Trail (AT), NC Mountains to Sea Trail (MST) and other wild places.

Most importantly, these stories and reflections come from over 135 student participants, and their contributions are truly appreciated. It is exciting that stories come from every wilderness trip, every team, every year - from 1985 to the present.

Caldwell Fellows (usually shortened to Caldwells) have done wilderness trips for 28 years (since 1985), including 27 years of wilderness trips out west. Thirty-five teams of students have gone out west (for eight years there were two teams each year) and over 320 students have participated. Several teams did spring break trips to the Everglades, with NC Outward Bound guides, from 1985-91. On the eleven ASB trips I’ve advised there have been about 20 Caldwell participants.

As we begin ‘recruiting’ students each year we inform them of the trip purpose: personal and leadership development, the challenging outward bound approach to stretching your limits and handling the unknown/uncertain, and enjoying the beauty of the wilderness area. We emphasize that experience isn’t required, but physical conditioning is necessary to enjoy the journey. There is usually a ‘marketing theme’ such as,

Can you see yourself in the beautiful Colorado Rockies? Away from studying and into nature! An opportunity to experience camping by a mountain stream, backpacking into remote wilderness areas to the summit of a great snow-covered peak… you and a small group of NCSU Caldwell students. Makes me want to sign up and ‘go’!

There is no shortage of wonder in American parks and protected lands, and students exhibit a child-like response to the wonder as they backpack into deep canyons, on the sides of volcanic peaks, across sandstone mesas and to the top of high altitude peaks in our western mountains. Wow! This land is my land takes on a new meaning when you live in the wonder.

Bengt served as a leader his last time in 2010 (unless he is recruited in the future) and now lives in Chattanooga where he followed his wife for her medical residency. In his comments sent to the 2011 Legacy dinner, Bengt spoke to the philosophy undergirding leadership of the wilderness program. "There is rarely a break in NC State’s classes when Jerry is not scheming up some plan to get out into the wilderlands. He is always going to some new out-of-the-way place (usually where there is not a roof nearby!) and amazingly, his desire in this regard while I have known him has never, even slightly diminished. Travelling would make sense if his desired location involved a cruise, some wine and cheese, and maybe an afternoon massage by the seaside. At his age, many people think this is the only life left to be lived.

No, the places Jerry has in mind are truly wild; unforgiving canyons lit only by midday sunlight, snow and rock covered escarpments overlooking waterfalls and blue green lakes, naturally fed hot spring pools in a cold desert, all of them many miles from the nearest civilization and often from the nearest people of any kind. These are destinations which Jerry dreams of and plans to visit. His capacity for wild adventure, while rare, is not the most surprising part of Jerry. In his mind’s eye Jerry doesn’t envision himself as the main and solitary character, braving these far off landscapes with austerity; what really gets Jerry fired up is to think of a group of friends growing through a journey there together.

Jerry’s excitement to be in new, unpredictable country is extremely attractive to experience-starved students, especially Caldwell Fellows. For those who have left the confines of home to find a whole new realm of responsibility and expectation awaiting them in college, Jerry’s invitation to the wilderness is unique. He gives each group a simple instruction: climb up that mountain, up to where you can’t see the top from here. Indeed, many extremely talented and experienced Caldwells have never heard such a wild instruction, and do not know where it comes from or where it is going to lead them. Almost always it leads them deeper into understanding of themselves, each other, and their individual and shared capacities. His instruction is easy to bear, because he wants to see the best in those around him, bears their burdens patiently, and can laugh and have a great time in bizarre situations. In short, Jerry loves others, and that is why people will follow him and listen to him. So it is with the Wild Wind that blows Jerry Barker, and that will continue to take him, and us – if he has anything to do with it – to places we have never imagined."

Good leaders must first be good servants. - Robert Greenleaf

Why the wilderness trips? (printed in a 2007 Caldwell newsletter)

In Mount Analogue Rene Daumal asks why bother in the first place? – why do we do what we do? As students prepare for their wilderness trip they might be asking why bother in the first place? As I prepare for my 20th Caldwell Fellows wilderness trip I know why, and Daumal has answered it well.

The Caldwell Fellows selection criteria mention a commitment to personal and physical challenge and growth, and to learn through doing. The wilderness trip uses these methods to focus on self-discovery, teamwork, challenge and getting out of your comfort zone. It is a blend of service-learning, Outward Bound and adventure challenge in a wilderness environment. The group is actively engaged in creating summit experiences and carefully observing the challenges confronted and solved by them and their teammates. Compassion is lived each day. One hopes that after these experiences, the learnings become a part of students that help them find their direction in the lower regions – the future daily paths of life.

Mark Udall, former Director of Outward Bound, says it well in his article, Conditions of Passage, where he describes his return from adventure trips this way: I bring back one small part that allows me to feel more alive, that allows me to give a little more to the ones I love, that allows me to dream new dreams. These adventures…are of my passage from the old me to the new. The conditions of these passages require me to take every step. Without them I am less. With them I am more.

There are other aspects of the wilderness trip that are not so profound-sounding but are vitally important to the purpose and success of the trip. A very strong bond is formed among team members and often these friendships last a lifetime. Solo and reflection time is vital to a student internalizing and maximizing the trip (the two quotes shared above are on our reading sheet.) We strive to find some of America’s most scenic areas for our climbing, mountaineering and sightseeing, what for some students is their first look at the western U.S. And last but not least, we strive to have fun…and we do have fun!

We can’t stay on the summit forever; we come down…and that is why we bother in the first place."

Children who don’t experience nature won’t grow up to cherish or protect it. -The Trust for Public Land

I used the analogy many years that Caldwell students were like powerful sailboats with large sails, capable of record setting speed and ability. But the larger the sail the larger the keel needed to give stability and control. We also used the analogy of a giant oak tree needing a wide, deep and healthy root system to give it a solid anchor in the storms that will come its way. The wilderness experience is designed to build and strengthen the student keel and roots, allowing the student to be anchored with a solid root system, but also adaptable and balanced to withstand stormy winds and stay on course.

Sticking with the sea analogy, I share with students about the ‘outward bound’ philosophy. A ship is safe in the harbor but that is not what ships are made for. So an ‘outward bound’ ship is one that is leaving the safety of the harbor and going out to do its task – if a military ship it will carry soldiers or weapons; if a cargo ship it will carry cargo to an awaiting port; if a pleasure ship it will take passengers on their cruise; if a fishing boat it will go out to where the fish are and begin to fish. We are not meant to sit in a safe harbor; we have a mission and a purpose in life. We have to leave the safe places and venture outward -- leave our comfort zone.

In 1 Chronicles 4:10, Jabez cried out to the God of Israel: ‘Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain.’ And God granted his request. In 2000 Bruce Wilkinson wrote the #1 New York Times Bestseller, The Prayer of Jabez: Breaking Through to the Blessed Life. We would do well to read these 92 pages, and expectantly pray a simple, unique, honest prayer as Jabez did. What is the territory you want expanded and enlarged – business success, family territory, influence, joy, service to others? Do you desire that your territory of keel and roots, your foundation, be enlarged and strengthened?

If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together African Proverb (shared by Chris Corn)

From Chris Corn come these thoughts. "I’ve been on many trips associated with the Caldwell Fellows and Jerry Barker. Enough that I have a hard time keeping them all straight in my head. The first was a hiking trip in the NC mountains on the AT. I borrowed a pack from my brother in law and Jerry loaned me a sleeping bag that he assured me would be warm enough. (There may or may not have been a cartoon character printed on it.) We were working off of old maps and there had apparently been a change in the trail. We missed the turn off and ended up traversing across a bald with night falling a long way from where we planned to be. We made camp in the dark on the bald with a brisk wind that got colder and colder as the night wore on. I was wearing everything I brought with me and was praying for daylight. I was more than happy to get up first and get the stove going after a pretty miserable night. Despite this, or because of it, I kept coming back for more. AT trips through most of North Carolina and Virginia, Colorado collegiate range as a senior (’93), Alumni trips to the San Juans and Wyoming, volcanoes in Ecuador (’01)…every trip has countless stories.

Hopping boulders the size of Volkswagens up Tourist Creek in Wyoming until my boots de-laminated…

Questionable medical judgment in using duct tape over Andy’s blisters generated by wearing borrowed boots on a 40 mile AT trip…

Near death experiences glissading in the Collegiates…

Aborting climbs in Ecuador due to illness…

Sleeping out to watch the Perseid meteor shower in the San Juans…

So much about these trips has had a profound impact on the way I view the world and myself. More than anything else, they are a study in contrasts. They are a time for deep personal reflection while also a time of meaningful camaraderie.

In one way, these trips are a time for intense personal reflection. I’ve made decisions, about whether to continue education, the direction of my career and deciding to ask my wife to marry me while on these trips. The day to day pace of the trips combined with the breathtaking beauty lends a clarity that is difficult for me to capture anywhere else.

The flip side to all of the personal reflection is the time spent with other members of the trip. Being out in the wilderness with a group of other people is a unique sharing experience. Everyone is united by common goals. It has a way of stripping away a lot of the pretension that is common in everyday life. Everyone is tired and smells bad. Some days you are strong and can offer more to the effort, other days you embrace humility and allow someone else to carry the heaviest load. You sympathize with the person who is struggling and share in the triumph of the person who has never done something like this before. Conversations are real. Fears, dreams and goals are shared between relative strangers in a way uncommon to any other environment. The exertion combined with sharing profound wonders builds fast friendships. There are people that I have been with on these trips that I rarely see or talk with outside of trips that are special to me because of the intensity of our shared experience. Once you have been in the wilderness with someone, you have a deeper understanding of who they truly are just as you often find a new and deeper understanding of yourself."

The real cycle you’re working on is a cycle called yourself.

Robert Pirsig in Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

Action words

I will not sit waiting for some vague tomorrow, nor for something to happen. One could wait a lifetime, and find nothing at the end of the waiting. I will begin here. I will make something happen. - Louis L’Amour

A goal of our wilderness trips is to become more action oriented, to assume responsibility as needed during our journey, to be an active team member – to raise your hand, get up and go. Throughout the Bible are many action words and they inspire and challenge us to take action, get up, show up, get going, do good and serve others. A sampling includes the following:

In John chapter 21, verses 16-21 are action orders to Throw your net on the right side of the boat; Feed my sheep; Follow me; Take care of my sheep.

In Matthew 7:7-8 is Ask, seek and knock, showing an increasing intensity and involvement in personal actions.

The great commission of Jesus in the 28th chapter of Matthew is to go and teach.

The Golden Rule of all major religions is to love one another, love others as yourself, and do unto others as you’d have them do to you - all actions.

The book of 1 John 3:18 states let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth (NIV), or Let’s not just talk about love; let’s practice real love (The Message, or MSG).

1 Corinthians 13, known as the love chapter, speaks clearly as it defines true love and also what love is not. Love is an action word.

For example, Galatians 6:2 (MSG) says stoop down and reach out. This reinforces the quote I heard long ago that says we never stand so tall as when we stoop down to help a child. Actions, love, and example are intertwined. At a 1964 FCA conference while I was in college, Albert Long shared a poem that meant a lot to me then and continued throughout my life, guiding me in my teaching jobs, camping trips, directing summer camps, teaching Sunday School, and raising my two daughters and nurturing my two grandchildren.

"There are little eyes upon you And they’re watching night and day.

There are little ears that quickly take in Every word you say.

There are little hands all eager To do everything you do,

And a little child who’s dreaming Of the day they’ll be like you."

- Shirley Mitton

Jerry was once asked: Do you have trouble getting students who don’t consider themselves nature-friendly to sign up? The reply: Persuasion has to be used sometimes. But everything about the Caldwell Program is trying to get you to do things that you normally wouldn’t do. Every year there’s three or four students who say they’ve never camped out a night in their life. But they sign up!

What’s next? What’s the risk?

These are two frequently asked questions on the wilderness trips. We must always try to look and plan ahead, setting priorities for upcoming tasks. Experience teaches us how to figure out problems where there is no obvious answer, and when students lack experience, more questioning is required. Wilderness students are not in their normal environment; however, making good decisions in this environment is important for safety and success. These assessment skills are transferable to any and all environments.

In addition to 10 essentials for backpacking, someone has identified intangibles to stay out of and get out of trouble: assess risk, stay calm, prioritize leadership and stay positive. The urge to press on into unacceptable risk might be due to testosterone, inexperience, optimism, or ‘escalating commitment’, which is unreasonably persisting in an endeavor that is heading to failure. I’ve been part of two great case studies of turning back for safety. My group ascending Mt. Rainier turned back in the face of deteriorating weather at 13,000’ when one of the four said it was time to descend – our predetermined rule was that any one of us could make that call. And on Gannett Peak in Wyoming, we were about 10 hours into our climb when one decided it was too late and would be too risky to continue up the final ridge to the summit.

Can experience and careful planning prevent every disaster? No way. Risk underlies any journey into the unknown. The x-factor is described in a Backpacker magazine article, which says don’t fool yourself into believing that the odds could never catch up with you in the outdoors. Mountains crumble; loose rock on a cliff is like the sudden thunderstorm hitting a peak or the rattler you didn’t see. We accept these hazards when we venture outdoors. It is impossible to eliminate all risk in the outdoors. Trees fall; bears behave unpredictably -- extremely rare but the wilderness is not a theme park -- nothing is a certainty, which is precisely why we go there in the first place. Our adventures in the wild are some of the happiest times we share, but don’t pretend that the world is perfectly safe, whether in the wilderness or the frontcountry. Cars skid on icy roads; cancer strikes; rocks break loose. (Excerpts from Michael Lanza, author of Before They’re Gone – A Family’s Year-Long Quest to Explore America’s Most Endangered National Parks)

We take every precaution to mitigate risk and make our wilderness trips a safe experience. Leaders are constantly assessing risk and teaching students to observe potential dangers and prevent problems, such as dehydration, heat exhaustion, sunburn, stream crossings, crossing or climbing rocky slopes, snow travel (falls, slides, avalanches, cold), hypothermia and frostnip, lightning precautions, blisters and infections, fuel and fire safety when cooking, treating water, not sharing germs, and not getting lost. One of our goals is to prepare students to safely continue camping and backpacking into their futures

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. -Theodore Roosevelt, The Man in the Arena

One could also say it is not the one sitting in the safety of a harbor who counts, but it is the one who goes out, the doer of deeds. When we are ‘outward bound’ and daring greatly, we may fail – storms may throw us off course or even sink us and prevent us from completing our immediate journey/task – but we will not be with those timid souls who never know victory or success. Push those boundaries.

Definitions:

Altitude Sickness, or Acute Mountain Sickness (AMS), is a condition caused by a lack of oxygen at altitudes generally over 8000’, resulting in a general ‘sick all over’ feeling, e.g., nausea, dizziness, headache, loss of appetite and lack of energy. For those coming from Raleigh at 325’ altitude, the Rockies and Sierras take a few days to adjust to, so we gradually acclimatize, drink lots of water, take aspirin, and rest when we can.

BLM (or Bureau of Land Management) is an agency within the US Department of the Interior that administers America’s public lands, totaling approximately 247 million acres, or one-eighth of the landmass of the country. BLM lands are available for open camping, as is most National Forest land.

Fourteener, or a peak of 14,000 feet or more. Colorado claims 54 fourteeners, more than the rest of the nation combined. Mt. Elbert, highest in Colorado at 14,433’ is 12th highest in North America. (For comparison, Mt. Mitchell, NC, highest point east of the Mississippi River, is 6684’.)

Note: We mention altitude and mileage in describing our trips to help you understand the difficulty of the route. For example, it is much harder to hike a mile at altitudes over 8000 feet, whether ascending or descending, than 4000’ on the East coast. When we plan a backpacking trip, trail altitude and elevation gain and loss are important considerations.

GORP – ‘Gobs Of Raisins and Peanuts’ or ‘Good ole raisins and peanuts’ or trail mix: a zip lock bag mixture of raisins, peanuts, cereals, nuts, M&Ms, dried fruit, etc.

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Kejuan Weaver glissading near John Muir Trail and Mt. Bago area of California, 2011

Glissading is the act of descending a steep snow covered slope via a controlled slide on one’s feet or buttocks. It is an alternative to other descent methods such as plunge stepping, and may be used to expedite a descent, or simply for the thrill. The easiest type of glissade is sitting while holding an ice axe in self-arrest position for control and safety.

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Brian, Julie and Cary postholing in deep Colorado snow, 2004

Postholing is the act of breaking through the top layer of snow crust into the soft mushy stuff below, typically up to the knees or above. Imagine the type of hole a fencepost sinks into: Narrow, straight, deep. Now imagine taking a step on what you think is hard-packed snow, only to hit a soft spot and sink straight down into it. Your leg creates, then immediately occupies, a posthole in the snow. Once this has happened, the only way to go forward (or back, actually) is to pull the leg straight up, out of the hole it has created, before you take another step forward. If you postholed once there’s a good chance you’ll posthole again. Truly, there is no slower or more agonizing way of making forward progress in a snowfield than postholing.

Rock Climbing Rating: You will see rock climb names listed with a rating number. The Yosemite Decimal System is a set of numeric ratings describing the difficulty of a climb. The class of a route is derived from its crux or hardest move. Class 5 is climbing involving technical moves, and specialized protective hardware and training are used by the leader to protect against a fall. Class 5.0-5.4 means a person of reasonable fitness can climb at this level with little or no rock climbing skills. Climbs rated 5.4-5.7 require rock climbing skills and a belayed rope for protection. Climbs rated 5.7-5.9 require good rock climbing skills, climbing shoes, strength, and a belaying system. We seldom climb level 5.10 or higher since excellent rock climbing skills and training are required.

During the course of our backpacking trips we frequently climb class 3, which is climbing or scrambling with moderate exposure, where the angle is steep enough that hands are needed for balance. On rare occasion we will be on class 4 terrain, defined as intermediate climbing with exposure extreme enough that most mountaineers will want a belay, a fall could be serious and your hands and arms may be needed for balance or pulling yourself up.

Snow School is a time to practice traveling on snow. The group practices walking across, up and down a snow field; proper use of their ice axe as a belay; how to stop themselves with the ice axe if they slip, called ‘self-arrest’, in various positions; and, how to safely glissade. Repetition is critical to learning these skills.

…and now, the rest of the stories…

CHAPTER 1

BUTTER IN MY SPAGHETTI

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Crossing the Left Fork of North Creek on the Subway from the bottom hike in Zion National Park, 2010: Caitlin, Halli, Nikki, Natalie

To write an historical account of 30 years of university students participating in wilderness trips is a challenge. How do you gather feedback from students? Will it be interesting to read? How do you edit to tell the stories and keep it interesting? What is the value in doing it? But you have read this far – that’s a good sign.

I decided to write so there would be a history recorded. It was surprising and pleasing that so many students contributed their memories and reflections of their trip. The personal, entertaining, easy to read stories are interspersed with the daily mundane activities of living in the woods, but there is, however, a place for descriptive narratives and individual reflections of the day to day backpacking journey. Therefore, we’ve made an effort to blend the exciting, touching stories with the trip journal kinds of facts.

A trip into the backcountry starts with the first step—raising your hand—then a second step— making a commitment— then following through, pushing your boundaries and completing the journey. I sometimes think a trip never ends, considering the friends made, memories recorded in our minds and lessons learned for our future journeys and stages in life. Here are a few interesting stories to lead the way – eight snapshots of student memories.

We’ll begin with Scott Teixeira’s Caldwell Wilderness Reflection (Class of ’93, Colorado 1990 trip): "There’s a pop culture reference that aids in the telling of this story. If you’ve seen it, think back to Eddie Murphy’s 1982 debut film, ‘48 Hours’, and the scene where his character, the criminal Reggie Hammond, is introduced for the first time. The scene opens with Nick Nolte’s character, Detective Jack Cates, making his way through an uncharacteristically quiet cell block. Gradually, the audio is filled with a not-so-melodic a cappella rendition of Roxanne, by The Police. When the source of the performance is found, the camera focuses on Hammond, sitting in his prison cell, wearing dark sunglasses and earphones in a clear attempt to send himself away from reality and into his own private bliss. Detective Cates stands and stares for a moment, watching and listening to a steady crescendo of Roxanne lyrics, delivered in ear-piercing bursts from the supremely uninhibited Hammond…… so, hold there and capture this scene for a moment; I’ll come back to it during the story of our ascent up the mountain.

My memories of the 1990 wilderness trip to Colorado are fuzzy. I can’t recall everyone’s name nor any of the specifics of where we went and when. I know that we skied on the last day and that at some point we had all rented bikes and cycled up to the Vail Pass. The cycling is a standout memory because it was the most exhausting uphill bicycle climb of my life followed by the longest high-speed downhill coasting of my life – and I don’t expect that it will ever be surpassed. I remember being underequipped, which was my own fault of course. I had opted to cut costs by not investing in a pair of high quality hiking boots and had decided instead to eke out the last bit of wear from an old pair of work boots. I’ve made bigger mistakes in my life, but the boots decision was definitely a doozy. One memory will remain clear forever. It’s of the morning we climbed the mountain. The overall story of our climb is something I actually can’t tell. I’ve forgotten the name of the peak, forgotten the name of the trail we took, and forgotten the name of where we camped the night before. I don’t remember breaking camp or setting out, nor do I fully remember being at the summit. I have pieces of memories from the summit, like sitting on a rock eating a granola bar, smiling and laughing with my fellow Fellows, doing the obligatory and slow three-sixty to soak in the late morning view, and reveling in the top-of-the-world sensation that comes, I’m sure, from any successful climb. Curiously, I have no memory whatsoever of the descent. What I do remember with crystal clarity is a string of only a few minutes that came shortly before dawn, about 45 minutes after we began the trek.

We hiked in a column with the experienced hikers up in the lead. I was near the back. There might have been some occasional conversation, up in the front possibly, but for the most part I remember the silence. I had long thought that the term deafening silence was cliché, but the land we were walking through was quiet beyond quiet, interrupted only by the sound of the snow crunching beneath our feet. For me, with no treads left on my old boots, each step was a challenge. In the days leading up to the climb, many in the group had expressed concern about the condition of my boots, but I confidently dismissed their caution telling them that the boots were in better shape than they looked and that I wasn’t worried. The truth of course is that the confidence was a ruze – it was a blend of stubbornness, embarrassment, and stupidity. It took full concentration to land each step without slipping. Even more concentration was required to fight off the fear of having to reveal to anyone that my feet were already wet and cold. And so that’s where I was when this memory begins.

I would say that the blackness of night had started to disappear, but there never really was any blackness; from the start, the landscape glowed silver-grey with the reflection of moonlight off the snow. As dawn started to arrive, the color of the world around took on a hue that simply can’t be described. It was a shade of constantly shifting blue, deep and dark, that only existed at that moment, or maybe also in the mind of Mark Rothko when he painted Blue, Green, and Brown. Suddenly, the silence was broken by a cry that came from near the front of the line. Slow and loud, the cry was "GIANT STEPS ARE WHAT YOU TAKE". It came out of nowhere and ended the same, and had been delivered with all the volume and gusto of Eddie Murphy’s Roxanne (and so here’s where you can recall the scene from the beginning). It was the opening half of the first phrase in the lyrics to "Walking on the Moon by the Police and had been followed soon, after the same long rest in the original song, by the closing half, WALKING ON THE MOON". The surreality of the moment had moved someone near the front to call attention to the shear amazement of where we were and what we were doing, and it clearly didn’t come from someone with wet feet who was staring down step after step.

All of us acknowledged with laughter and joined the chorus in agreement – it was like a high-adventure version of the scene from The Breakfast Club where the kids gradually sync themselves into a whistled recital of the theme from The Bridge on the River Kwai. The spontaneity continued. I have no idea how we divided ourselves, but some of us took on the part of bellowing the crucial bass riff that carries the tune’s rhythm: ‘Bu- Bum Bum Bummm…..(rest)….Bum Bum Bummm…..(rest)….Bu-Bum Bum Bummm’, and the rest of us called out the remaining lyrics with equal measures of wonder and delight:

GIANT STEPS ARE WHAT YOU TAKE

WALKING ON THE MOON…

WE COULD WALK FOREVER…

WALKING ON, WALKING ON THE MOON

It was a moonscape indeed; desolate, cold, and wild. It was also pure treasure. Some people don’t understand the draw of high adventure – the cost, discomfort, difficulty, exhaustion – but I do. It offers an experience that cannot be produced or duplicated in any other way. It’s only available to the Adventurer, and to those of us who were lucky enough to be taken into the wilderness with Jerry and the Caldwells."

Now Scott has done a good job painting a word picture for something happening on the side of a mountain in Colorado. As you read, you join them in smiling; if you know the tune you hum along in your head; you begin walking with the group. Those are the memories that students share throughout this book and invite you to come along.

Butter in my spaghetti is Alex Martin’s title for his reflections of his 2011 journey into the snow of the Sierra Nevada mountains. To whet your appetite, here is a paragraph on food, at the end of a long, hard day of backpacking in the snow. On the menu was rotini with tomato sauce and cheese. I think the meat eaters threw some cubed chicken in theirs. I walked up to our makeshift kitchen lightheaded and hungry, demanding that we add butter to the sauce. I could feel my body needing fat. Ariel advised me that the cooks had already added butter, but I didn’t care. Someone passed me the tub of Country Crock and I used my spoon to scoop a massive blob of the stuff into my bowl. The butter melted right into the pasta and I ate greedily. I could feel my body change. This was the best pasta I had ever eaten in my entire life.

Stuart said this about a great moment in the San Juan Mountains of southwest Colorado in August of 2012: "I will never forget what the wilderness trip to Colorado in 2012 taught me about the importance of compassion in the midst of ambition. We were climbing our second fourteener in two days, Red Cloud, and we knew at the top there would be a ridge over to Sunshine, so we had the potential for summiting two fourteeners in one day. Everyone was talking about how they weren’t sure if we could do it, but I was certain that I could. After battling up the mountain for hours we made the final precarious steps to the top