Strongest With You (The Reawakening Series, Book 4)

By Kelly Violet

A life he yearned to reclaim...
Colton Strong hid behind a mask. As the frontman for his band, Country Blue, he’s known for his soulful tenor and brooding nature. He leaves his guard up and for good reason. Nobody gets close enough to see past the carefully-constructed façade. Until Darcy. Once the petite fireball enters his life one night, setting off sparks in the darkest parts of his soul, she won’t leave his mind. Too bad that amazing night also holds some terrible memories. When she left town without a word, he knew he had to do everything in his power to get her back.

A love she had to let go...
Darcy Williams faced another crossroads. A guilty conscience won’t let her forget the consequences of her actions a year and half ago. Thousands of miles away from the only people who matter to her, the loneliness is taking a toll. But she would have to make a choice soon. Stay away or return home? Then the enigmatic frontman shows up on her doorstep unannounced, and she’s in for a new wave of heartache. Saying goodbye to Colt had never been part of the plan, even though she knew he was better off without her.

Can they put the past behind them for a shot at happiness?

Because love gives you strength in the darkest moments and when you need it most...

• Language: English
• Publisher: Kelly Violet
• Release date: Mar 31, 2021
• ISBN: 9781954572010

Kelly Violet

Kelly Violet is a fan of love and writes romance in all forms. You can expect her stories to be fun and flirty, angsty and gut-wrenching, or downright dark and extremely naughty. One thing they’ll all have in common is a happy ending, however it comes. No matter the obstacles or dire circumstance. Either way, it’ll be a roller coaster ride of emotions, just the way she likes it. Music and dancing are her go-to outlets. If there’s a party and a dance floor (optional), she’s usually the first one out there. When not writing, Kelly can be found working at her day job assisting people in their search for information and concocting a plan to write more. Thank you for joining her on this journey she’s dreamed about pursuing for many years. Kelly loves to hear from readers, so be sure to drop her a line on social media or at www.kellyviolet.com.

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Blurb

A life he yearned to reclaim…

Colton Strong hid behind a mask. As the frontman for his band, Country Blue, he’s known for his soulful tenor and brooding nature. He leaves his guard up and for good reason. Nobody gets close enough to see past the carefully-constructed façade. Until Darcy. Once the petite fireball enters his life one night, setting off sparks in the darkest parts of his soul, she won’t leave his mind. Too bad that amazing night also holds some terrible memories. When she left town without a word, he knew he had to do everything in his power to get her back.

A love she had to let go...

Darcy Williams faced another crossroads. A guilty conscience won’t let her forget the consequences of her actions a year and half ago. Thousands of miles away from the only people who matter to her, the loneliness is taking a toll. But she would have to make a choice soon. Stay away or return home? Then the enigmatic frontman shows up on her doorstep unannounced, and she’s in for a new wave of heartache. Saying goodbye to Colt had never been part of the plan, even though she knew he was better off without her.

Can they put the past behind them for a shot at happiness?

Because love gives you strength in the darkest moments and when you need it most…

Copyright

Strongest With You

Copyright © 2021 by Kelly Violet

All rights reserved. This book is licensed to the original purchaser only. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereinafter invented, including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the express written permission of the author.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental. All product/brand names mentioned herein are registered trademarks of their respective holders/companies.

Published by Pump Up the Violet Publishing, Los Angeles, CA.

Original Photo by Vyshnova on Depositphotos

Cover Design by Kelly Violet

Cover content is for illustrative purposes only and any person depicted on the cover is a model.

ISBN-13: 978-1-954572-01-0

Printed in the U.S.A.

Dedication

To the readers: I’m so thankful to every single one of you who have joined me on this journey. It has been a roller coaster ride for sure. Thank you for taking a chance on me and my book babies!

As always, a special thanks goes out to my family and friends who give me their boundless support. You know who you are, and I love you!

Table of Contents

Blurb

Copyright

Dedication

Prologue

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Five

Chapter Twenty-Six

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Epilogue

Also by Kelly Violet

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About the Author

Prologue

How was I supposed to know the best experience of my life would end up being the worst night for someone I love? The answer was, I couldn’t. And yet, the memory of that day sent a chilling shudder down my spine instead of a happy tingle. That night was tainted in my head now. I’d made it all about me, and my best friend paid the price. It was my fault. 

"You ruin everything."

The energy buzzed all around us. It was electric. Lively. And I wouldn’t likely forget a second of it.

The Colton Strong Band finished their set at the packed club a few minutes ago. We drove several hours to see one of their live shows. The four guys left the crowd wanting more, including me. Especially me. And it wasn’t just about the music, even though the songs spoke to something deep inside me. I wouldn’t mind spending the rest of my life listening to the lead singer. The man was sexy as sin. 

He had a voice that reached into my soul. Most of the lyrics felt like a swift kick to the rear as they struck hidden depths within me. They made you wonder, made you feel. Heck, they made me hurt, but they also seemed to heal too. I couldn’t really explain it, but that didn’t matter in the long run. What mattered was that we were lucky enough to discover their music in the first place and now, we were seeing them live in concert.

And for the first time in my life, I was in love. But so was every other girl in the venue tonight. Heck, maybe some of the guys were too. Rolling my eyes at myself, I tried getting the bartender’s attention again. After the house lights came up, I hightailed it over to the bar, dragging my best friend, Wyn, along with me. 

Going to live shows became one of our favorite pastimes as soon as we could afford to get into venues on our own. In a sense, this was kind of a last hurrah for us, at least until I returned from my trip to the UK early next year. I was in my happy place, spending this time with my favorite person in the whole world. It would be difficult having an ocean between us for the next several months. We’d been friends for so long, I couldn’t imagine not seeing her every day. But I was following my dreams. 

At a young age, I became fascinated with the ocean and marine animals. And now, I got to study and help them. My fish friends came a close second to Wyn.

Thinking about my upcoming trip abroad sent a pinprick to my heart. Instead of focusing on the negatives, I pushed these mixed emotions away and put all my effort into making the most of our night out. And first up was securing our fruity drinks. 

Dar… Wyn tried to get my attention again, but I tossed my hand up, signaling her to give me another minute. I was seconds away from getting our cocktails. Plus, the swelling noise of the still-crowded club drowned out her words. The bartender handed back my credit card and receipt. After shoving everything into my small purse, I released a satisfied breath. 

Time to get back to the regularly scheduled programming of hanging out with my pseudo-sister and partner in crime.

Here you go, Wyn. Drinks in hand, I spun around to find my best friend in the whole world staring at me with bugged-out eyes. The expression made her look like a cartoon character. As I geared up to open my mouth and ask her what the heck I missed, her wide gaze whipped over to something next to me.

With too many questions on my mind, I turned my head to the left and then craned my neck up…and up. That’s when my world tilted on its axis.

Oh frick, Colton Strong is standing right next to me.

Fainting was a huge possibility but a horrible cliché right now. So, I tamped down the ultimate fangirl reaction and stopped my body from turning into goo. Barely.

Wyn plucked her drink from the outstretched hand that was still frozen mid-air. Thankfully, I hadn’t dropped either of our cocktails in my sudden comatose state. No, I just stood there looking up at the man who’s played the main role in every single fantasy since I learned about the band.

With my head tipped back, I peered up at him, mouth opening and closing like one of my beloved fish friends. The moment felt beyond surreal and comical. My confusion was only second to the complete and utter shock that kept me frozen in place.

Between ragged breaths and the sudden onset of heart palpitations, I probably looked crazy. Especially eyeing the gorgeous frontman who managed to leave me speechless. And oh my God was he gorgeous this close. He had sandy blond hair and eyes that were a chestnut brown color with flecks of green. I wanted to curl up and sink into them. Just thinking about the husky timbre of his soulful singing voice gave me chills. His voice called to me on a level that was difficult to explain. Yet, some things required less explanation and more feeling. And that was the beauty of the band’s music. It made me feel. Sometimes a little too much.

But right here and now, with his unexpected appearance and attention focused on me, I was mesmerized. Struck mute. And anyone would tell you, especially my best friend, that I was a chatterbox on a good day. And today was definitely a good day. Yet, with Colton’s sharp, brown eyes holding my gaze, words lodged in my throat.

Hi, I’m Colt Strong. He didn’t smile, I noticed, but that hardly detracted from his appeal. It enhanced it, actually. He gave off these brooding and mysterious vibes on stage. I guessed that transferred off stage as well. I blinked, desperate to form a reply to his introduction that wouldn’t come. 

Gosh, I’m such a spaz sometimes. Especially in this moment when it mattered most.

A nudge from Wyn finally got my electrical system working again. Turning my gaze on my friend, I tried to speak, to say something flirty or complimentary to the man of my dreams. Heck, I’d even go for intelligible right about now, I told myself.

I blinked and looked to my left again. He was still standing close by, his mesmerizing gaze on me. Warmth surrounded me on all sides.

And yet, the only thing that came out was a squeaky, Um, hi.

What the heck is happening right now? Was I having a waking dream? A fricken seizure? One of those fantasy sequences like in the movies?

My friend seems to be tongue-tied for some reason. Her name is Darcy. And I’m Wyn.

Nice to meet you both, he said. I know he said it because I watched the way his lips formed every syllable. He glanced at Wyn before settling his attention back on me. I must be dreaming because this can’t be real life.

I couldn’t explain why his presence stunned me so much. It wasn’t unexpected that band members came out to chat with fans. Wyn and I had the opportunity to meet a few of our favorite artists because we liked to stick around after shows. But nothing and no one ever struck me dumb quite like this.

His presence consumed me, and I needed to get a grip because it didn’t mean anything. It couldn’t. I was sure he was simply being nice. And here I was being a complete spaz as usual. 

He was a dream come true. Warm brown eyes, six-foot build, brooding demeanor. And the man stood a couple feet away from me. I couldn’t believe it.

Darcy? 

He stepped closer, taking more of my breath away. Moisture gathered in my closed mouth, and I gulped. Even though I couldn’t be sure what was happening, I knew it was monumental. Life-altering. I had a mind to run and hide because of the way he looked at me. Into me. At the same time, I wanted to cuddle up in his arms while we held each other close. 

I’m surely losing it.

Shaking my head at the image, I tried to function as a sentient and competent human being again. After spending another moment in suspended disbelief, I cleared my throat.

Um, yeah?

Would you two like to hang out with me and my bandmates?

Nothing will ever be the same again. The wayward thought whispered in the back of my mind as a quick glance at my best friend urged me to answer the man. I never could’ve fathomed how accurate that sentiment would be, though. Not for any of us.

And I’d never forgive myself because of it.

That’s how I met Colton Strong, lead singer and stoic frontman of the Colton Strong Band, now Country Blue. And it was hands-down one of the best days of my life. 

Until I learned the truth about everything that happened that night.

My heart shattered into a million jagged pieces just thinking about it.

Those shards cut deep.

But it was exactly what I deserved.

I guessed my mother was right after all.

I do ruin everything.

Chapter One

Colton

Yo, Colt!

Hearing my name snapped me back to the present. I stood in the cramped practice space we rented at a recording studio downtown. The mic stand in front of me came back into focus a moment later. 

How long did I zone out for this time? Dammit! I needed to snap out of this funk I’ve been in for too many months. These days it didn’t take much for me to space out when there was a moment of quiet. The guys had gone out to get fresh air, but apparently, they were ready to return to work.

I was the one holding everything up.

And wasn’t that a damn role reversal? 

Is he purposely ignoring me right now?

I know I am, Rafe quipped from my left.

The drummer scoffed at the bassist’s slight dig. A look over my shoulder showed the short, stocky man standing near a corner. He tapped a foot against the floor like it was already over his pedal. As the conversation and brotherly ribbing buzzed around me, I struggled to focus on the task at hand. There was always some shit rattling around in my head, but things had become over-the-top distracting lately. Which meant I couldn’t concentrate worth a damn right now. 

And it’s only getting worse. 

Mano, what the hell’s going on with you? Berto Alvarez, badass drummer and stereotypical man-whore, threw out another question. Doug Lawson was currently gesturing at him to cut it out, but of course Berto ignored him. And my other bandmate leaned against the nearest wall taking it all in. He tossed me an inquiring look with the lift of his dark brows. I shook my head. Now was not the time to get into this, no matter how distracted I became.

I had to get us back on track.         

They were my brothers, these three men. At least that’s how I thought of them. I’ve known them for years, except for Rafe Tapiro, who only joined us last year. Yet, he turned out to be the best damn decision we made in a long time. And as the last several months flew by, we turned into a well-oiled machine with a shared purpose. It hadn’t always been this good, though. The band’s passion had reignited anew that day last spring when we found Rafe’s notes and lyrics. Annoyingly observant most of the time, he had spot-on instincts on how to elevate our sound. And he likely had a good idea what held all my attention lately. Or should I say who?

Shit, I couldn’t let myself go down this road again. Not when we had work to do. Because that line of thinking led down a dark road with no guideposts or forthcoming answers. There would be time to focus on my troubles later.

I was the frontman of this band and needed to fucking act like it. 

Nothing. Let’s start back up, I found myself saying to Berto, hoping to defuse the volatile situation.

Well, stop spacing the fuck out then. Jeez, am I the only one ready to work today?

Cut it out, jackass. Let’s play. Doug’s words sliced through the room. When he returned his attention to tuning his guitar for the next set of songs, Berto continued to seethe.

A long minute passed before I heard, Whatever, mano.

Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and let the music wash over me as the guys started playing. A second later, the lyrics flowed from somewhere deep within my soul. Sometimes it felt damn good to release the pain behind a song, cathartic even. And other times it was just as gut wrenching as when I first put the thoughts down on paper.

And now, everything seemed to hit differently. Harder. More visceral. The music and lyrics pelted my skin, stinging exposed flesh like bloodthirsty insects. I’d be raw by the end of the day. Worn down and exhausted.

I wanted to welcome the impending oblivion, though, and that wasn’t ideal. Or healthy. Not in the fucking slightest. 

Everything seemed fractured. Between this moment and the music, my attention split itself right down the middle. And there was only one reason for it.

Darcy.

She’d been gone for more months than I cared to count, and with little to no contact from her end. She shut me out of her life, and I had fuck-all idea why.

When she’d left for Scotland right after we met, we stayed in contact. I made a point to exchange my information with her. A connection had formed between us. One that I’d never experienced before, and I thought the feeling was mutual. I hoped she felt the same way. And now, she was running away from it. From me. It was time I figured out why.

I found some form of solace in the music most days, but it wasn’t a cure-all for what ailed me now. Nothing ever worked out that way for me. That would’ve been too easy. And my life was anything but, no matter what anyone thought they knew just by looking at me.

There was no way to wrap my head around her disappearing act, though. It all happened like a swift kick. The redheaded beauty was here one moment—with her bright personality and impish charm—and completely gone the next. 

I couldn’t help but think she was hiding from me; the reasons why lay far beyond my grasp. That’s when my utter frustration eventually turned to anger. By the time Thanksgiving rolled around, I was livid and confrontational. And the one person I needed to confront was nowhere in sight. Which had me turning on my bandmate.

I knew how much she adored Wyn’s grandparents. I got the feeling she wasn’t close to her own family, since she talked about the older couple as if claiming them as her own. So, I had to wonder why she’d miss spending the holiday with them. Since being back in the states, it was only a short plane ride away.

After storming away from a placating Rafe, I stewed in my anger for a bit. Then I started wondering if something deeper was going on. Maybe she needed a little bit of time. And the boiling ire inside me deflated like a slow leaky tire.

Not hearing from her hurt. The connection we forged since that night stayed with me. Buoyed me. I wasn’t ready to give up on her yet. On us.

My thoughts circled back to square one. Since coming to that conclusion a couple months ago, three things kept me company. Music, my frustration, and this unending loop of questions. 

As the final notes of a song ended, another one started. The order of things was intrinsic, instinctual. Coming up was Save Me from Myself, and I wasn’t sure how well I could block everything else out except the music. Hell, I hadn’t been doing a great job of compartmentalizing anything today. The careful façade I constructed years ago got sliced open right down the middle. As a result, all my fears and insecurities oozed out for public perusal and consumption. This constant daze wasn’t my usual M.O., and it showed.

Most of the song lyrics came from the darkest part of me, from buried memories I couldn’t quite let go of. I tended to cloak the pain enough that no one questioned me, but things were starting to bleed through.

When forgetting wasn’t an option, I wrote. Putting pen to paper seemed to help better than some of the therapy sessions I attended over the years. When my thoughts got too dark, too destructive. But nothing was ever a quick or easy fix. Fuck, if that didn’t sound like the story of my goddamn life. Then and now.

I wasn’t a weak, little boy anymore. Still, that didn’t mean some parts of that scared boy weren’t still present, crying out for help. Hoping to find some semblance of light and peace in the perpetual darkness.

I couldn’t forgive or forget what happened all those years ago. What they let happen. What I let happen. It didn’t matter that I was too young to do much more than cave into myself. They abandoned me in more ways than I wanted to count. In all the ways that mattered. Betrayal after betrayal heaped on my head.

I needed a break before all these damning emotions spilled over and shrouded me in darkness. Before I busted at the seams and self-destructed. That’s why I needed to reach Darcy somehow. She was a source of light I never expected but yearned for with each passing day. Every breath.

Continuing like this wasn’t wise. I’d been running us ragged with rehearsal after rehearsal, show after show. The full calendar of gigs was great since it kept me distracted while getting us more stage time. The crowds got bigger with each passing set, too. But snapping was inevitable if I kept us going like we were. The sharp, smoky scent of tension filled the air around us.

Shit. Right then, I realized the music had stopped again. The echo of the last note faded out like the softest whisper in the enclosed space. I stood stock-still, the mic picking up my breaths and casting the labored sounds through the room. A loud clatter met my ears a moment later. I jerked back to the here and now, cutting off the meandering thoughts. Damn, I had to get my head on straight.

That acute feeling of someone staring smacked into me. I turned my head only to clash gazes with one pissed off drummer. The man had a hot temper sometimes and for the first time in forever, he directed it at me.

What gives, mano?

I’m good, man, I told him, knowing it was a bold-faced lie. For some reason, I had a feeling he wouldn’t let me off the hook so easily this time around.

Like hell you are. He jerked up out of his stool, a drumstick pointed accusingly at my chest. You were just standing there like a fucking zombie. Did your mind go off to la-la land or something? What the hell is up with you lately?

Let it go, Berto. He said he’s good, Rafe piped in again. He stood off to my left, his bass guitar resting against his torso as his hand held the neck of the instrument. I sent a subtle nod of thanks in his direction. As Berto leaned over his drum kit in the corner, his words slammed into my eardrums. One part of his innocuous questions hit their mark, echoing through my head like a revelation. La-la land. And the craziest idea began to form.

Cool it, okay. Let’s just get back to work. Doug stood behind me to my right. If anyone could get Berto to listen, it was him. They were best friends for as long as I could remember. He acted as the calm hand to Berto’s storm-like nature.

But holy hell, Berto’s outburst gave me the perfect idea as the room quieted around us again. I shoved the thought away to consider after practice ended. 

If I could keep my head on straight, we could finish up in less than an hour. And then I’d have plenty of time to set things in motion. I hoped.

We had a show this Friday, but after that, there was a break. With back-to-back gigs, all while working to record a Country Blue EP, we deserved a little time-off before the craziness started again. The record was almost ready to go up on streaming sites in the coming weeks. We were solid for the moment. If nothing fucked it up.

I knew a break was necessary. We needed to cool down away from each other. And I desperately needed answers. Especially from a certain redhead who captured my attention since day one.

But I’d have to figure all that out later. Right now, wary glances ping-ponged across the room, and it was my job to get us back on track.

Then, I’d see if this crazy-ass plan was even a good idea. That required a clear head and more than likely pleading for some information.

I shoved random thoughts from earlier into a box in my mind, hoping they’d stay put until I was ready to let them out again. I needed time to figure out some shit. Hell, we all needed time apart. Going nonstop for months on end had taken its toll on us. Tempers and emotions were soaring and then crashing hard, and we didn’t need the negative energy. Especially now when things were going exceptionally well for us. 

And my inability to focus was the number one culprit ratcheting up the tension in the room. Get it together, Strong, I told myself.  I hoped the admonishment would help keep my mind on the music for the rest of practice.

Taking a deep breath, I let the stifling air of our small practice space settle around me. The room came back into focus, clearer and sharper than before. I’m still here, I breathed in and out, repeating the words over and over. It didn’t break me. And I wouldn’t let this thing with Darcy knock me down either. I planned to do something. This time I would fight.

Because she was the brightest damn thing to come into my life. Besides music and the current trajectory of the band, there wasn’t much else to my existence. I couldn’t give up on us without seeing her again. I wouldn’t forgive myself otherwise. 

With the click of Berto’s drums, we got back to the music. That one thing always settled something inside me, if not my rioting thoughts. My emotions drove the music, though, tearing the words right out of my chest.

I wrote most of the lyrics myself, the songs coming from deep and dark places inside me. Now, Rafe was adding