Employment Interview with a Vampire: The Vampire's Housekeeper Chronicles, #1

By J Bennett

Get ready for a very different kind of vampire story…

 

While Deidre's potential boss possesses a wicked set of fangs and a hankering for a certain ruby refreshment (preferably served fresh and hot), he's also got a fashion sense that hasn't been cool since the 1800s. Nathaniel adamantly prefers the telegraph over the telephone, votes for Eisenhower in every election, and isn't so sure these horseless carriages will catch on.

 

Can Deidre survive her employment interview with a vampire and somehow convince her potential boss that corsets and petticoats aren't the fashion of the day?

 

Oh, and what's she going to do about that geriatric vampire hunter sneaking around the haunted mansion?

 

If you're looking for a fun and funny supernatural story with a relatable (and often exasperated) heroine, then you've found it! Welcome to the first novella in The Vampire's Housekeeper Chronicles series!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Endeavor Reads
• Release date: Apr 23, 2021
• ISBN: 9798201715298

J Bennett

Author J Bennett lives and writes in San Diego. She loves devising new worlds and pummeling her characters (both physically and emotionally) before giving them their triumphant endings. Her household includes two lazy cats and a bunny who occasionally eats her manuscript. (Clearly, he’s just jealous.) When she's not writing, J enjoys running on trails where she definitely doesn't get into philosophical arguments with her characters, because that would be weird. She also likes lifting heavy things at her CrossFit gym and spending time with her very patient boyfriend.

Book preview

The Vampire’s Housekeeper Chronicles Series

Employment Interview with a Vampire (Novella 1)

Duel with the Werefrog (Novella 2)

Clash with a Vampire Relation (Novella 3)

Apprenticeship with a Vampire (Novella 4)

Thanksgiving with Werewolves (Novella 5)

Showdown with the Supernatural Hunter (Novella 6)

Chapter 1

Betsy Riddle of the Bullseye Employment Agency is a kind person and also apparently fond of polka dots. That’s why, when she glances at my skeleton of a resume, her big smile doesn’t waver and she says, Well, Deidre, it looks like you’re in the starter phase of your career.

This is so much better than the truth, which is that I’m still in the never started phase of my career. I fidget in the seat across from Betsy’s desk and count the white polka dots on her pink blouse. In my head, my stepmother’s voice chants, I told you so! I told you so!

She did happen to mention that newspapers weren’t really a thing anymore when I started college, but I was intent on getting my degree in journalism. So I did, and I picked up plenty of student debt along the way. Shock of shocks, when I graduated the newsrooms were more interested in putting veteran journalists out to pasture than bringing on a plucky beat reporter. Even my exceptional exposé in the university’s paper revealing that the cafeterias routinely provided ketchup past its due date didn’t land me any job offers. That story was so much better than Skylar Hutchins’s piece about bigfoot sightings here in Dayton, but now she’s working at some up-and-coming lifestyle blog.

Life isn’t fair. While Skylar Hutchins writes about finding the perfect bra fit or ranks the latest collection of Lululemon leggings, I’ve been out of school for almost two years with only three low-wage temp jobs and an apartment the size of a closet to show for it. The last temp job ended a month ago, and I’m about to lose the closet.

This is why I’m sitting in front of Betsy Riddle wearing my one clean blouse—the one that makes my armpits itch—and trying not to look as desperate as I feel.

After a perusal of my resume—it doesn’t take long—Betsy Riddle gives me a short interview. This involves me shaking my head and repeating the phrase, No, but I’m sure I could learn, several times. Betsy’s big smile begins to waver.   

I expect Betsy to tell me to get lost in a very pleasant and supportive way. Instead, she leans back, looks me over doubtfully, and asks if I have any housekeeping skills. I consider the Leaning Tower of Dirty Dishes currently on display in my sink as well as my three pet cockroaches and assure Betsy Riddle that I could be a fantastic housekeeper. She inquires about my cooking skills, and assuming that the word cook is synonymous with microwave and Toaster Strudels, I affirm.

Betsy Riddle nods and sighs. The polka dots across her blouse quiver. I have one position that might be suitable for you, she says with a peculiar hitch in her voice.

As I’ve mentioned, Betsy is not one to say a mean thing about anybody, so what she tells me is that an older gentleman is currently seeking a housekeeper for his fixer-upper on the other side of town.

Nathaniel has certain... predilections, Betsy Riddle says oh-so-carefully, which she follows with a nervous laugh, but don’t we all? Her cheery lipstick is the same pink color as her blouse.

She never gets around to telling me what those predilections are, and I’m too giddy at the prospect of a job to ask. I leave her office with an uncharacteristic swagger in my step. Maybe this is the turning point in my life where things finally start going right. I’ve watched enough rom-coms to know that every down-on-her-luck girl eventually gets her moment.

Maybe that super hunky guy who works at Arby’s will finally look up from the beef slicing machine and give me a smile. Maybe I’ll lose those extra 10... er, 25 stubborn pounds and wear a pretty little sundress without my thunder thighs chafing. Maybe I’ll be the best housekeeper ever and this Nathaniel guy will give me a raise. Heck, maybe Nathaniel will be even hunkier than my Arby’s dream guy, and we’ll fall in love, and I’ll be mistress of the house I once cleaned. Yes, it’ll be Maid in Manhattan, Ohio version.

These happy thoughts accompany me as I drive back to my apartment building. I hardly even feel my itchy armpits. On the way, I almost decide to treat myself to a roast beef sandwich at Arby’s, but then I remember the spiderwebs currently forming in my bank account. Not yet.