Advice From A F*ck Boy

By Clint Coley

Advice From a F*ck Boy, from comedian Clint Coley, turns his raw podcast about navigating relationships for millennials into a page-turning coming of age story. The stories are more than laughs about getting over on women, leading girls on and ghosting for no reason -- Advice From a F*ck Boy is a brutally honest look at a self-proclaimed former f**k boy's relationships. The stories are hilarious but Coley wants you to pick up what he's putting down to learn from his mistakes and strengthen your relationships.

Now why would anyone want to take advice from a f*ck boy? Because somehow men turn into them and women end up with them. Advice from a F*ck Boy is the book everyone needs to take a little accountability (yes, men and women) and have everything they want in life, including relationships.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Aug 10, 2021
• ISBN: 9781098388126

Book preview

Text Description automatically generated

Copyright © 2021 by Clint Coley

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the author, addressed Attention: Permissions at [e-mail].

Everybody Eats Productions, Inc.

Los Angeles, CA

www.advicefromafckboy.com

eBook ISBN: 9781098388126

Printed in the United States of America on SFI Certified paper.

First Edition

Dedicated to Mrs. Juanita  Savage-Cohen, Keira Coley and Mr. Freddy

---

MAKE SURE YOU LISTEN TO

Advice From A F*ck Boy Podcast

Advice From A F*ck Boy

Table of Contents

PROLOGUE

Why I’m Writing This Book

REAL QUICK

What Is A F*ck Boy?

CHAPTER I

F*ck Boy Shit Was Passed Down

CHAPTER II

Your Wingman Can’t Be A F*ck Boy

CHAPTER III

Shooting Your Shot is Four Quarters Bro

CHAPTER IV

You Got Her? Cool, But The Macking Don’t Stop

CHAPTER V

The Friend Zone Is Where You Flourish

CHAPTER VI

Fellas, Women Really Do Know Everything

CHAPTER VII

Know Your Role. Play It Or Step To The Side My Guy

CHAPTER VIII

Leading With Money Ain’t It

CHAPTER IX

What You Ain’t Gonna Do

CHAPTER X

Don’t Call It A Comeback

CHAPTER XI

The Shift

CHAPTER XII

What Did We Learn Today?

PROLOGUE

Why I’m Writing This Book

Inspired By Deneia Freeman

They say soulmates are usually someone you fall in love with and all that romantic stuff, but I firmly believe that your soulmate can be anyone, and you can have multiple soulmates.

Let me tell you why I’m writing this book and how my soulmate, Deneia Freeman, inspired me. In June 2010, I moved to New York City from Philadelphia to pursue a career as a comedian. Besides a handful of comedians, I didn’t know a soul in the city. The only person I had was my cousin Deneia. We’d meet at the Sheraton Hotel on 7th and 53rd once or twice a month. Looking back, I have no idea why we would meet there, but that is beside the point —  it just felt like some adult shit to do.

One day we were having a conversation about what I wanted out of comedy and the game. I told her that I’m going to be the greatest comedian of all time. She paused, looked at me, and said, I think your impact on comedy will be bigger and more than just being on the stage. I see you doing TV, movies, whatever, but you won’t just be looked at as just a comedian.

I was offended. Twenty-three-year-old Clint wasn’t trying to hear that shit.  I was a comedian and that was the beginning and end of the discussion (or so I thought). But time proved her right. Eleven years later, 34-year-old Clint is writing a book. By the time you read this book, I will be an author. Man, I can’t believe it! The lesson here is to trust Black women y’all. I’m giving my cousin her flowers because without her this book would not exist. Thank you Deneia.

I’m writing this book because we have to grow up and do better. Before you suck your teeth and get mad at me, this is not one of those books. I’m not giving away our secrets and then painting us to be pieces of shit so women can use the book against us. That’s not my style nor is it what I am trying to accomplish. We legit have to grow up and I’m not exempt. The way we approach love, even just f*ckin, is all messed up right now. Women are angry with us. I see it on social media and podcasts every day. Women are explaining how they feel and men aren’t listening. We’re too busy trying to argue to prove our point when we just need to listen. This book is for both men and women.

Women, I’ve stated this numerous times: racism isn’t going to stop with Black people telling other Black people, Hey, that’s racist! We already know that. Racism will stop when white people hold other white people accountable for their actions and their bullshit. And that’s what needs to happen with men. Men need to hold men accountable for their actions and their bullshit. I know women want to help keep us accountable. But when I hear women on podcasts talking shit about men to an angry audience of women I wonder "What is that accomplishing?" Nothing. Just more frustration and more of the same cycle.  Men do listen. We’re probably turning it off and tuning you out because it doesn’t feel like it’s coming from love.

With all of that said, this book is me holding my brothers accountable for the bullshit we’ve put women through over the years. That includes the bullshit I’ve done. I’ll be honest, men’s egos are very, very fragile. Your delivery is why we can’t listen when you’re telling us about the dumb shit that we do. That’s it. Growing up, my mother (Hi Mom. She’s Ms. Juanita to y’all.) told me stuff all the time. I didn’t listen because she was always yelling about it. I understand how men take advice. I’m not yelling at men. I’m simply holding us accountable because it was super important to me and my growth as a man. I didn’t quit f*ck boy behavior until the men in my life frowned upon it. Ladies I hear you and a lot of times your complaints are justified. I’m just passing on the message to my guys so we can love you the way you’re supposed to be loved.

Now that doesn’t mean I’m on your side ladies. I’m simply calling out f*ck boy tendencies that were passed down to us. I’m not choosing sides because I am a man at the end of the day and we have perspective too. Honestly, y’all don’t listen to us either. Women be on that bullshit too and you know it (don’t roll your eyes, sis). This book is for men because I am communicating our perspective to women without trying to be right. That’s our problem. We want to be right and most of the time logically speaking, we are. Here’s the problem with that, though: love and logic don’t go hand in hand. Being right has gotten us nowhere, but the ones committed to getting it right have seen our luck turn around.

Fellas I’m not trying to preach to you at all. I was blessed to have some great older men in my life who were able to school me about my toxic behavior with women without making me feel like I’m less of a man. I realize that’s our most significant problem with constructive criticism — we take it personally. I need you to remember that your fellow brother is not hating or trying to play you when he’s telling you about yourself. Iron sharpens iron. If you have information that can help someone, it’s your duty to pass that along. I’m just doing my part. I’m giving you information that was passed along to me with my perspective.

Trust me. I got you fellas.

I’m going to share a lot of my personal f*ck boy stories and we’re going to laugh about it for sure but I’m also going to hold myself accountable. I will be honest about where I was wrong in situations and what I learned from them. If you’re reading this book to learn how to be a better f*ck boy, close the book right now and continue doing whatever you’ve been doing because this ain’t it. There is nothing cool or funny about hurting women or doing the best you can to get over on them. This isn’t a game we’re trying to win. This is real life and we want to do the best we can to strengthen our community better by loving each other well. That doesn’t mean we won’t make mistakes and do dumb shit. We just aren’t praising or celebrating it anymore. Enjoy the book. Let’s go to work.

REAL QUICK

What Is A F*ck Boy?

Inspired By Advice From A F*ck Boy Podcast

Before we get started, we have to answer the question people always ask me: what exactly is a f*ck boy? I’ve heard different definitions throughout my life and nobody seems to have a definitive answer. I will give you my meaning. You may or may not agree and this isn’t law, alright? I’ve heard women say, "F*ck boys are guys who can’t or don’t want to commit." I disagree with that.

A f*ck boy is a guy who lies to and or manipulates women to get what he wants. Plain and simple.

A f*ck boy will meet a woman and know she’s looking to be more than just friends but continue going along with the situation when he’s not interested in a relationship.  A f*ck boy says that they want the same thing but know damn well they have other intentions. They know that they don’t want to be that woman’s man. They want to have sex and enjoy the benefits of being her man without the title. Real players say that. F*ck boys lie about it.

Don’t get it wrong. You can tell the truth and still be a f*ck boy. Those are the ones who use manipulation and make women feel like bad people. Let’s take the same situation: a woman wants a relationship and you’re upfront about not wanting one. That’s cool. You two are on the same page. Fellas, let me tell you where you mess up.  You do things to make her believe you want more. Every time she gets in her feelings, you hit her with the classic line, "I already told you what it was." That’s bullshit and manipulation at its finest. Actions speak louder than words. This is a prime example of your actions not lining up with your desires. You choose to turn it around on her like you’re the good guy. You’re not. You’re just a covert f*ck boy.

CHAPTER I

F*ck Boy Shit Was Passed Down

Inspired By Herman Clinton Coley

When I meet women and we begin discussing dating, I always hear the same bullshit line, "Dating in 2021 is trash. Every time I hear that line I want to end the date on the spot. I’m sure you’re wondering why this makes me upset. It doesn’t. It’s just tired and redundant. My question to women who say this is, When was dating any better? Talking to women who think like this feels like I’m talking to MAGA people. When was America great? Let’s be serious. I digress, but you get the point. Please tell me when dating was better?" *I’ll wait.*

One woman my age (born in 1987) told me dating was better in her grandparent’s era. First of all, you weren’t around in the 60s. I bet 60s women were saying the same thing about men back then. She then proceeds to tell me how men just treated women better back then. Really? The 1950s and 1960s were when grandfathers legit had two whole families within a 30-mile radius that didn’t know about each other. Listen to this dating story: In 1964, Sam Cooke was shot and killed, right? His homeboy Bobby Womack married Sam Cooke’s wife less than three months later and then had an affair with Sam’s daughter. Go ahead and let the idea go that men in the 60s treated women way better. F*ck boy behavior ain’t new ladies. It’s been going on forever.

Women talk about how men back in the day were better but who do you think taught us to be f*ck boys?  We weren’t born like this. We learned it from our