Love Letters in the Sand: Ayla’S Faith

By Bella Louise Allen

Love letters in the sand is a continuation of first-time author Bella Louise Allens Miracles among Chaos. Experiential theories are explored in the authors search for peace in her heart as she helps a special angel from the other side reach out to all those who have loved and lost an angel or loved one of their own.

A childs last wishes are echoed in music, poetry, drawings, and communication with a newfound love for God and all his faith in oneself and the unseen glory that God has to offer each one of us. A learning center to be built in memory of all missing children and a cry for a special angels mother to connect with her from the other side.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Sep 17, 2016
• ISBN: 9781524625207

Bella Louise Allen

Bella Louise Allen focuses her love on family, faith and the love of God. A loving mother of three and a grandmother of five beautiful angels. She resides in Bangor, Maine and has found a new love for writing. Searching for peace in her heart and the love of Jesus Christ has led her to connect her heart fully to His. Finding happiness in her life finally and it was by the grace of Gods own love for her. A near death experience in March of 2012 opens new doors with first time author Bella Louise Allen. A modern day Catholic Mystic is brought love and light from the other side and finds there is more to life than what the natural eye can see. Feeling drawn to the church most of her life and it brings her own heart to life as Jesus Christ holds her hand daily and she writes love story after love story with Him. Experiential theories; brings to light many mysteries questioned by the church and many skeptics. Bella Louise Allen writes seventeen spiritually based books and they take the reader on a journey like no other. Traveling through time and space as she meditates and connects her heart to Jesus Christ. Prophecy revealed to a lonely child of God and she holds the keys to His heart. Jesus reveals secrets to Bella Louise Allen. She writes love letters to Gods children. Those lost and looking for His own love to shine in their lives. Providing love most of her life; to all that she has met led her to where she is today. Working in the healthcare field for over thirty years has given Bella the perfect chance to connect with people from all walks of life. Being loving and caring is nothing new to Bella. Sharing with the world the love God has for His children is Bellas new passion. Miracles among Chaos and Love Letters in the Sand are the first two books in a series. Bellas own true-life story written as she finds herself. These two books help the readers see the progression of her own awakening as she wraps her own heart fully around her soul-purpose and her passion for Christ; Himself.

Book preview

Prologue

Just the beginning

October 29, 2015

Life seems to bring us what we need when we need it most.

I have a wonderful story of love, faith and trust. It is not your normal

Love story. The story I have to share with those who are willing to open

Their hearts and minds is my journey finding God.

Love Letter’s in the Sand-Ayla’s Faith is not just an extension of my heart to God’s but an extension of a passion that goes deeper than anything I could ever imagine.

My second book in a series will show you how my journey with God and labeling with mental illness has not only affected me and my own family but the possibilities of how it has affected millions of families everywhere.

I suggest for more understanding on Love Letter’s in the Sand- Ayla’s Faith that readers check out my first book written MIRACLES AMONG CHAOS. It will help shed a light for all to see in the book that I present to you here.

I hope to show how my journey with God and all of life’s dramas and traumas can affect someone’s state of mind as well as how an awakening can change your whole world.

Mental illness and dis-ease is over riding our country and even our world. I hope to shed a little light and understanding on the subject by walking you through the love letters that I have left in my own sands of time LOVE LETTERS IN THE SAND.

Please enjoy my journey and remember we are all in this together to learn from one another and all of the tragedies and hidden miracles that God sets before us. His plan is only to make us more loving and more compassionate human beings. May God’s love and pure white light be with you each day and may you share your light with those who you meet.

Bella Louise Allen

Innocence Of The Child’s Voice

Dedicated to Sweet Pea

Her words are barely audible at times

Sweet, wet, slowly they come

I struggle to hear her syllables afraid to let her know

I’m sorry. I couldn’t understand.

The crooked grin that creeps across her lips and your heart seems to burst with the love that such a small gesture makes.

I sweep the hair from her eyes so she can see the love that shines from mine. This is the only gift you feel she will ever truly need.

As you snap that priceless photo in hopes of freezing time right where it stands.

Her skin is as pure and white as the dove that Noah sent to find the twig after the big flood.

Wondering what someday may come for her and for you. It stops your heart just for one moment.

We must all have faith.

Faith that His love will shine bright enough for us all.

For what else in life is there, than that sweet sound.

The innocence of a child’s voice.

AYLA FAITH

Meme loves you to infinity and beyond

November 14, 2015

Faith’s Beginning

Hi, my name is Bella Louise Allen and I was wondering, have you ever had that nagging feeling to do or say something until you thought you would jump out of your own skin? Well, this is that moment for me. In my heart I have always known I was meant to write. It is something that I would put down for a while, yet I kept returning to it time and time again.

My life has not been an easy one, but the one thing that has kept me going is my unending love for the Lord. I am by no means a bible thumper. I am just your ordinary, run of the mill, American girl.

It is by life experiences and lessons learned that I keep turning back to God time and time again.

I was first introduced to the idea of God when I was three years old. I first attended our small town Baptist Church. It wasn’t filled with spectacular stained glass windows or have a huge organ for filling the church with beautiful music. What it did have was good God fairing neighbors.

I remember the little white church with its steeple and big bell. This was one of my favorite parts about this little church. The bell would sound Dong, dong, dong. All the children would come running into the church and look around for a familiar face to sit next to and listen to the Pastor as he gives God’s message for the day.

I was the youngest of five. My brothers were Andy and Robert and my sisters were Eva and Amy. We attended Sunday service with our neighbors. Our parents were believers but not goers. Once we got to church we would split up and sit with our closest friends.

The day I fell in love with Jesus was the day I first saw him. It was truly love at first sight. His portrait was illuminated by a soft glowing light. There was a canvas painting overlooking the church. He seemed to be looking straight into the eyes of the whole congregation. It was as if no matter which seat you sat in his eyes were talking to only you.

My favorite memory of this church was the night we celebrated our dear Savior’s birth. It was December 1970 and it was a cold stormy night. The snowflakes coming down I swear were white and pure as the wings of angels. I remember all the children and the excitement of getting ready to present our version of the Savior’s blessed arrival. There were wooden hand carved barnyard animals. A donkey, a lamb and a cow. There was a small scale lean-to for the barn. The older children played the parts in the presentation as the three wise men. Mary and Joseph were played by my childhood friends. There was a beautiful baby doll with light brown hair and pink cheeks dressed in a long white gown with gold trim cuffs. Baby Jesus was lying in a cradle that the Pastor had provided for the Christmas plays for years.

I was so excited to be part of the choir. I learned quickly to appreciate the tinkling of the ivory keys. I may not have known all the words to Away in a manger, but I would watch the other children and what I didn’t know I would move my lips as if I did.

After our musical performance we all celebrated. There were lots of presents under the huge tree. We had strung popcorn and cranberries for the tree during Sunday school. We had our own personal Christmas ornaments made from the heart with Popsicle sticks, green and red yarn and we put our names proudly on our gift to baby Jesus on his birthday. The tree was adorned with various shapes and sizes of the hand cut snowflakes covered in silver and gold glitter to make the tree shine bright.

This is one of my finest memories of exploring my religious beliefs. At the tender age of three.

It was difficult to stay close to God, when the parents that you were born from, didn’t practice their faith. Somewhere along their journey it got lost. Lost in the work, lost in the pressure of it being forced upon them as a child or just losing their faith in themselves.

If there is a will there is a way. I remember attending many other churches throughout the years. I attended the Pentecostal Church across from my grandmother’s house. I loved that church, but not for the reason I should have at that age. It was all about receiving a gift. For every friend you brought to church you could pick a prize out of the treasure chest. To look back on it I find that to be immoral. Although from the eyes of the Pastor he was trying his best to get the people to the church to hear God’s word.

This was the church where I saw my first Baptism. I must say it was a little intimidating. To watch a grown man or woman stand in this big tub of water and get dunked under water. It scared me to death at that age. I now understand what was happening and it isn’t such a horrifying thing as it was to me at the age of seven.

My next memory of attending church was when I joined my grandmother’s church. The Catholic Church right next door to her house. The church itself wasn’t bad but the service itself could be confusing if you didn’t have a clue as to what you were doing. The sitting, standing, kneeling and singing was a constant work out when you attended Mass. I however kept finding myself coming back repeatedly from the time I was eleven to the present day.

In my late teens I even contemplated becoming a nun. I went to watch a young girl get sworn in. It was such a beautiful process. She seemed so peaceful with herself and the life she had chosen. That was something I had dreamed of for many years. I guess the very reason I sought out God and His light was so that I could have a great love and peace in my heart that I couldn’t seem to find anywhere else.

As my life seemed to change from childhood to puberty and then to adulthood the one thing that never seemed to change was my search for peace. Peace and harmony in my life and a calm and strength within myself to go on through each day.

After surviving child abuse, mental, physical, emotional and sexual abuse I quickly got married and had children. I was doing what felt right to me at the time and yes everything we do is not without a purpose or a plan. I feel deep within my heart that all we live through and do is a lesson in God’s plan for our growth. Whether that lesson is self-love, to help us teach our children better, to make us grow stronger in faith or to help lead us back to Him again. There has been a plan for us before time began.

My married life was not that easy. The older I got the harder my life seemed to get. It was like I was going backwards in the learning process. The man that I fell in love with was disconnecting himself from a woman he never really knew. I don’t think I ever really knew myself at that point.

I was a stay at home mom for five years and I started to want more. What I wanted I wasn’t sure of. I felt like I was going to crawl out of my skin if I didn’t have somewhere to go. Somewhere to grow. I found some escape from motherhood and being a wife when I went back to school and started a part-time job. It seemed really great.

I thought I was tired as a stay at home mom. That was nothing compared to working part-time, going to school full time and then raising three children and a husband.

For many years I would wander aimlessly. I wandered from job to job and nothing seemed to be enough. I would spend money as fast as it would come in and that only put a bigger strain on my marriage.

I tried to love my children more than I was loved. I was buying them everything I thought they needed or wanted. Little did I know I was only setting them up for disappointment in the early teens and young adulthood?

I started my own business with the intentions of getting out of debt and making a better life for all of us. I had no idea money couldn’t buy the love of my children or my husband and it definitely couldn’t buy our happiness.

I think back on the love that we did keep for one another through all the chaos that was present with the workaholic mother who was on the brink of a mental breakdown. The alcoholic father who was doing the best he could with what he had learned from his own journey as a child. My oldest child Mary Ann, I drew strength from. She was the rock that held me together. My oldest son Billy was a picture image of myself. I saw love and caring beam from his smile as he looked for acceptance from all. He was showing signs of something, I just couldn’t put my finger on it for many years. Then my youngest son Corey was just trying to survive all the chaos he was born into. It was a really rough road for all of us.

When you bring two people together, marriage can be life altering once the marital union comes together and procreates. You may think you come from two different worlds, when in fact you have lived a life that mirrors one another.

There was rampant alcoholism on both sides. There was child abuse, numerous devastating deaths and the lack of faith all playing a role in how we made our choices based on learned behaviors. Those choices in turn impact the lives and choices that our children make. It all seems to be a vicious cycle. Like it or not it is what has been planned for each of us for a very long time.

It is up to us to learn from our lessons or to push them aside and keep on struggling against the wave of life’s tide. Only we can change our lives. For the good or the bad. We have control of what we let happen and what we change.

Love Letters In The Sand

I feel your sweet breath

Pushing me, guiding me

I write letters in the sand

My heart swells to over flowing

Each day is like spring

I hear His wondrous song

I write letters in the sand

The sea gull soars high above

He soars the land for that which sustains

I write letters in the sand

Follow my words if you can

I will show you His love

I write letters in the sand

2.14.16

Bella Louise Allen

Moving Past the Pain

During my entire life there has been an inner struggle. No one knew it