Finding the Treasure in Oneself and a Mate

By Earl Minter

Most of us are excited to experience new relationships because our minds can see endless possibilities. But when the novelty wears off and we have to begin to work at keeping things fresh, we quickly move from feelings of ecstasy to thoughts like There has got to be more to this relationship than what I am experiencing. And you are exactly right there is so much more to discover in any relationship when you have the right illumination.

There were hidden treasures in my relationships just waiting to be discovered. I learned this from studying scriptures like 2 Corinthians 4:7 But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. The key for me is to believe that there are treasures in others even when I cannot see them. What was blinding me from seeing the treasures in my mate was that she had buried them under all the hurt, pain and betrayal that she had experienced in her life. And also I was looking at her through the damaged lens of my own broken life.

God said to me, The treasure is within us, and that cannot be changed. But it will take the help of the Master Surgeon to remove whatever has tarnished our treasure.

I want to help you understand that nothing you have been through can change the value of your treasure; as well as teaching you how to repair your relationships Gods way.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Oct 1, 2014
• ISBN: 9781490836003

Earl Minter

Earl Minter was born in Cleveland Ohio in 1959 to Betty and Earl Minter. Earl attended John F. Kennedy High School and graduate in1976. He went on to attend the University of Cincinnati where he studied Accounting and Finance. A door opened for Earl to move to Baltimore Maryland in 1980. Where he was able to land a management position with the McDonalds Corporation and worked there for several years. Later found employment with the Federal Government and he has been there for the last 26 years. During that period of time Earl got married and divorced but out of those marriages came 4 wonderful children and lot of wisdom for overcoming life challenges. Earl given his life to the Lord Jesus Christ back in 1982. It was not until almost lost everything Earl total surrendered his life to God. That was then when God became more real to Earl than life itself and his life began to change. In 1996 he joined New Psalmist Baptist Church under the leadership of Bishop Walter S. Thomas Sr. In 1997 Earl signed up for their three year Discipleship program and learned that he had been given the gift of teaching. After graduating in 2000 Earl became a Discipleship Facilitator for 6 years. He was also led to teach in the new members ministry where Earl is still active today. Earls love to be able to help people find the answers to the hard questions of life through the Word of God and his love continues to grow. He remarried in 2010 to the love of his life Yolanda and they have seen how God has blessed them and continue to take them to new levels of love that they did not even know existed. One of the main reasons for him writing the book was because in his14 years of teaching the Bible; Earl would always hear people complaining about their relationships with their mates. And how most of them just wanted to walk away for their mate and never get involved in any type of relationship again. It would break Earls heart because he could feel their pain. Because he knows it is not easy trying to end a relationship with someone you have once shared your life with. His greatest desire is to teach people how much God loves them and wants to restore their relationship through the Word of God. And even if you have a great relationship with your mate there is still so much more to be discovered in you and them. Why because God has made us like Him. The Bible says There is no searching of God understanding. So that means because you are like your Heavenly Father you have so much inside of you that still needs to be discovered. Earls book will help you discover your hidden treasures. Earl is available for speaking and teaching engagements or conference he may be contacted 410-227-7551 or e-mail address [e-mail] web addresswww.atreasure4u.com Like him on Facebook Earl Minter or follow him on twitter @EARL MINTER

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Copyright © 2014 Earl Minter.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scripture taken from the King James Version of the Bible.

WestBow Press

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

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ISBN: 978-1-4908-3599-0 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4908-3600-3 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2014907920

WestBow Press rev. date: 10/1/2014

Contents

Dedication

Chapter One Why Me?

Chapter Two What Is A Treasure And How Do You Find It?

Chapter Three It Is Not Good For Man To Be Alone

Chapter 4 The Ultimate Treasure-Seeker

Chapter 5 There Is A Pirate Out There Trying To Steal Your Treasure!

Chapter 6 Dethroning The King Or Queen In Your Life

Chapter 7 How To Program Your Gps System For Treasure

Chapter 8 Turn Left In 200 Yards [System Recalculating Directions]

Chapter 9 Can You Show Me What You Are Working With?

Chapter 10 Opposites Do Attract, But Can They Stay Together?

Chapter 11 Can You Be Trusted

With The Gift?

Chapter 12 Faith: Foolish Abandonment, Illogical Thinking, And Humility; Without It You Cannot Get God’s Attention

Chapter 13 You Need 5-Gs To Get That Treasure You Are After

Chapter 14 G-2 Is Greatness

Chapter 15 G-3 Is Gratitude

Chapter 16 G-4 Is Guidance

Chapter 17 The 5Th-G Is Giving, Which Will Always Lead To Receiving

Chapter 18 You Are A Priceless Treasure

About The Author

DEDICATION

I want to thank all the women in my life that taught me how to love God, for without Him this book would not have been possible. The way you love a God you cannot see is by loving the people that He has placed in your life to share the gift that He has placed in you. The first and most important person in my life is my mother Betty. Who showed me unconditional love; she loved me through all my faults and failures and never gave upon on me becoming the men she knew I was created to be. My greatest memory of her comes from seeing her early one morning as she was praying. I got up early one morning to go to the bathroom. The house was totally dark except for the light that was shining from my mother cracked bedroom door and what I saw was her kneeling down in front of a chair with her bible open praying. As I was going back to the living room the LORD spoke to me and said The only reason that you will ever be anything in life is because that woman prays for you night and day. So for that I want to publicly thank her.

You might have heard the song My Grandmother prayed for me. My grandmother Eola defiantly brought that song to life for me. Prayer is truly the starting point for guiding one’s life but it is what one does after they have prayed that makes the difference in their life. What I love about my grandmother is she would always speak the truth in love. It may not have always been what I wanted to hear but it was the truth I needed to hear. I can say that at 94 years old she is the wisest person I have ever met. I cannot say that I always took her advice but years later I wish I had. How different many of our lives would have been if we could have followed the wisdom of our elders that tried to speak into our lives, never realize they had already been where we are trying to go.

The next woman in my life I cannot forget is my sister Sharon. My mom said that when they brought me home from the hospital my sister said Where is my baby at? From that moment on I think my sister thought she was my mother. You know how it was growing up how the older sibling was supposed to watch over the younger one. But I wanted to be my own boss so I did not want my sister to taking care of me. But my sister did in spite of my attitude a great job because she loved me and she always had sense enough to do the right thing unlike me. Where would I be today without my big sister who is still very supportive in everything I do.

If I had to design a woman to be my wife based on my craziness or should I say my unique ways it would have been my lovely wife Yolanda. She has definitely helped me become a better husband with her prays, patience and love. I have learned that the two have to become one and it does not just happen when you say I do. Our transformation has been like the process that a caterpillar has to go through to become a beautiful butterfly.

To my two beautiful daughters Melkia and Destini in whom I am well pleased in the women they have become. I have also been blessed with two wonderful sons Emery and Raeshawn who I have learned from how to be a better father, watching them raise their own child. And to all the children who have adapted me to be their father I love you like my own children and thanks for the pleasure. In memory of my loving father Earl Minter Sr. who showed me how to have a burning passion for life and loving people. When I was growing up they would say It takes a whole village to raise a child I have had so many other mother and father figures in my life that I cannot count all of them much love to you all. If you can make it through this life with one or two friends that will walk with you the whole distance you have received all the treasures of life that you could ever need. So to all my friends and you know who you are thank you for all your love and encouragement and support may God richly bless you.

CHAPTER ONE

WHY ME?

Have you ever been in a relationship with someone and there were some things about them you wish you could change? After trying for a while, you decide to break up with them because of their issues; in your mind you felt they would never change. Then, a few months later, you see them with someone else, and they seem to be so happy. The first thought that pops into your mind is all the hard work you put into them and now someone else is reaping the benefits. Deep down inside you wished you would have stayed with them. You go home and call them and ask them to take you back. It is funny now how you can only remember all the good things about them and forgotten all their issues. Their reply is, You had your chance, and you blew it.

When you have been in this type of situation, people reply with statements like One man’s loss is another man’s gain. Another great one is You do not miss your well until the water runs dry. I would never refer to people as being trash, but to make my point I will use the phrase One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Unfortunately I have been on all sides of these statements; and, believe me; whatever side you are on it does not feel good. I am sure you know all the effort it takes to start a relationship and then all the pain it takes to end it. At times like these, many of us decide that we will never fall in love again and have our hearts broken. That is one of the main reasons I am writing this book: I have learned that you cannot let your past failures keep you from your future blessings. Also I have heard so many people complain about their mate or their children, or even their family members. They would say things like, I feel like walking away from everything and never coming back, not realizing the treasure that they are about to throw away.

You are probably asking yourself what qualifies me to write this book. In the Bible 1 Corinthians 1: 27 says, But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; I know that it had to be God Who called me to write this book because I feel as if I am the least qualified person to talk about relationships. When He told me to write it, I said, Why me, Lord? He said, Who is better qualified than you with all the foolish mistakes you have made? He said I would be able to tell people all the pain it would cost them if they chose to do things their way instead of doing it God’s way. God said that He wanted someone who could speak from their heart and not from their head.

Before I go any further, I want to thank my lovely wife, who is a great treasure in my life. My wife, Yoyo, has been one of the biggest inspirations for this book. She saw things in me that others thought were a problem, but she realized that I was a diamond in the rough, and she believes that nothing is too hard for God. I have been married several times and have four beautiful children. I thank God for them and all their mothers. That’s right, I said mothers, plural.

It has been only God’s grace and mercy that I am still in my right mind. A lot of the words and terms that I am going to use come from the Bible or things that you might hear in church. The people of God have a language all their own. I am going to do my best to try and explain church phrases in the language of the world that makes a little more sense. Whenever I talk to people, I have to be real and very transparent because I have found if you tell the truth about what you have been through, you can help someone get through whatever issues they are dealing with.

One of the great examples of this is the time I was teaching a class at my church and the Holy Spirit began to lead me to start talking about a subject that had nothing to do with what I was teaching. I began to talk about how my dad had committed suicide. I mentioned how when I was going through the most difficult time in my life, the devil tried to tell me to take my own life. Just as a footnote after that thought, I heard God speak to me like a real person; He said to me, I did not bring you this far to leave you now, which is the reason I am still here today. After I finished teaching the class, a young lady came up to me and said that she was thinking about going home and killing herself because of a broken relationship in which someone had thrown her away. One of the things I had to convince her of was; that at our lowest points in life, when we think no one loves us, God begins to speak to us with loving words.

Jeremiah 31:3 says, The Lord hath appeared of old unto me, saying; Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have drawn thee. Hebrews 13: 6 says, So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me’ These verses have given me such comfort in times of stress. You need to find some Scriptures in which you feel that the Lord is speaking right to you personally. I began to give that young lady my own personal testimony of what God had done for me. She began to have hope and did not take her life. She is still alive today, thank God.

When I think about my father’s death, I feel it was one of the worst things that ever happened in my life. I wanted to know why God would let that happen, but I never seemed to get a verbal answer from Him. When I began to search His word the thought that came to me first was to read Romans 8: 28 says, And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose. Then God spoke to me and said, You know that I said in my word that it is my wish that none perish. Deuteronomy 30:19 says, I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life that both thou and they seed may live. God has given all people free will and choice, and He will not take that back.

My father made his choice, but God knew eventually He would work it together to bring life if I would just tell my story and not be ashamed of what happened. I know that young lady’s daughter and future descendants are happy she did not choose death. So the young lady never met my father, but I believe it is because of his story she is alive today being a blessing to others. I have heard how she is winning souls for the Lord Jesus Christ. You can read God’s Word or even hear His voice, but it is not until you see with your own eyes what God can do, that you know He is real. I love what Job said to God in Job 42:1 says I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear: but now mine eye seeth thee.

After seeing God bring beauty from ashes in my life, I do not question what God is doing, but I ask myself what I am doing that is getting in the way of God’s fulfilling His perfect will for my life. I ask myself who am I that I should talk to people about this great God of ours. I am just an ordinary guy with a lot of stories to tell about my wonderful Heavenly Father; Who wants more for us then we could ever dream. I love the fact that when Jesus chose his disciples, He did not go to the school of the Pharisees or Sadducees; He recruited ordinary people, fishermen, tax collectors, sinners and mailmen—oops, that’s me. Jesus said to His disciples in John 15: 19 says, "If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you." I do not want to give you the wrong impression about me; I have not always been the nice little church boy who did everything right: you know, the type who went to church and prayed and came home and read the Bible. Nothing could be further from the truth. Jesus just said that He came and got me out of the world, and I am so glad that He did. If He had not, I would have busted that other place beside heaven wide open. The people who knew me before this amazing change took place in my life knew how I loved to dance and party and run women. I loved to party so much that I would take my work clothes to the club and take my club clothes to work because there were nights that I would not go home. When I talk to people, I can talk from my own personal experience, having been on both sides of the fence, once in the world, and now in the church, and sometimes sitting on the fence with one foot in the world and the other in church. I thought I was alive out in the world. I can tell you that I really did not start living until I met Jesus Christ. Do not get me wrong; living the world’s way was fun for a little while, but sooner or later you have to deal with the consequences of your actions, which are not fun.

The first thing I need to talk to you about is the way God chose me. It is called Grace, something which I know I really did not deserve. Grace is needed to save you, but grace is also necessary to keep you in your relationship with God. To try an explain Grace in a way that the world can relate to, I think about having a credit card and some of the terms that are attach to it. There are some credit cards that come with what they call a grace period that is the time period when you do not have to pay any interest on the purchases you made with their money. If you pay after that time, there is a cost which is interest. In essence the grace period allows you to get something that did not cost you anything during that time frame; that is the grace, and you walk away with what something someone paid the price for. Once that grace period is up, not only do you have to pay, but you are charged a high interest rate; and if you are late with your payment, there is also a penalty on top of the interest. So now what you have purchased costs you way more then you wanted to spend. The reason you need grace is probably because you cannot really afford what you bought in the first place; that is why so many people have debts that they can never pay back because they never calculated the interest and penalty in their budget. That is exactly why God has to give you Grace to get you out of the mess that sin cost you because you cannot really afford to pay back the penalty of sin. Romans 6: 23 says, For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. God’s amazing Grace gives you something that cost you nothing, but if He charged you for it, you could never afford to pay it back. But Jesus wanted to pay the price and the interest and penalty for your sins.

John 1: 29 says, The next day John seeth Jesus coming unto him, and saith, ‘Behold the Lamb of God which taketh away the sin of the world’ When I speak about God’s Grace, I think of His unmerited favor, or God’s giving me something I could never deserve. A good example of this would be my four children, whom I love dearly and who have never given me a moment’s trouble—now that is Amazing Grace, even when I was not always in their lives the way I should have been.

The reason I was chosen by God to write this book was not only because of His Grace but it was also because of His Mercy. When you have a loving relationship with God it is because of Grace and Mercy working hand in hand to draw you in. I always see Mercy coming first in my life before Grace steps in because before God can give me something I do not deserve, He first has to not give me what I do deserve. That is what Mercy is—not getting what you deserve for something that you have done.

There was a woman in the Bible caught in the very act of adultery, and the law said that she should be stoned to death, but Jesus showed her Mercy. John 8: 4-5 & 7 & 10-11 says, They said unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act. Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?’ So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself and said unto them, ‘He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her. When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, ‘Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee? She said, ‘No man, Lord.’ And Jesus said unto her, ‘Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.’ Jesus had lived a sinless life so He could have stoned her; He did not give her what she deserved, which was death, but instead He gave her life. This is also part of my own personal story. God did not give me what I deserved, even when I had some of my children outside of marriage. I have found out even the world understands what Mercy is. If a person is on trial and they have no defense for what they have done, their lawyer will tell them to throw themselves on the Mercy of the court. The whole Bible can be summed up in two words Mercy and Grace which add up to Forgiveness.

Moses asked God to show him His glory and God did. Exodus 34: 5-6 says, And the LORD descended in the cloud, and stood with him there, and proclaimed the name of the LORD. And the LORD passed by before him, and proclaimed, The LORD, The LORD God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering, and abounding in goodness and truth.’ When God Himself proclaims His own name, it contains the words Mercy and Grace. That’s why I love God—because of His unmerited favor and His loving-kindness that He shows toward us. God is the God of the humble, meaning those who will admit they need God’s help to make it in this world. God’s strength is made perfect in our weakness. James 4:6 says, But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, ‘God resisteth the proud but giveth grace unto the humble.

Grace is what saves us but it also necessary when you are living outside of God’s perfect will. I sometimes wish I could have learned by just hearing the word and then obeying it, but I did not. When I was a child, I thought like a child and acted like a child. But now that I am a little older at 55, God has given me a little more wisdom to obey by hearing instead of doing things that would bring God’s loving chastening upon me to teach me what is right. There are sides of God that I might not have ever experienced if it were not for the mistakes I had made. Now, because of them, I have such a level of intimacy with my Father God that I would not trade what I have been through for all the money in the world. If I had to choose a verse that my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ said that describes our relationship, it is Luke 7: 47-48 says, "‘Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much. but to whom little is forgiven, the same loves little.’ And he said to her, ‘Thy sins are forgiven.’" My love for God came out of His willingness to forgive my many sins. For me, when I put Mercy and Grace together, they equal forgiveness, which is what His Son Jesus Christ came and offered me. I can now help people who have fallen into sin to get back up with the compassion in my heart being able to relate to their pain and not be judgmental from my head.

You ask what is the different. I have an older sister who was pretty obedient as a child. If my mother told her the stove was hot, she would not touch it. On the other hand, if my mother told me the same thing, I would have to walk by the stove several times, each time getting a little closer until I touched it and burned myself. Now I have come to the same revelation as my sister and mother, that the stove was hot. After being burned from touching the stove, I start to experience the process that begins to take place because of my actions. A blister began to form on my hand after touching the stove that hurts; next comes the scab to begin to heal the area that was burned, which will leave a scar. Now if I see someone who is about to touch a hot stove, not only can I tell them that it is hot, but I can show them what will happen if they do touch it. I can show them my scar, which does not hurt anymore, but it is a reminder of the pain that my disobedience cost me. When you learn through experiences, you have a heartfelt testimony that can help others to keep them from going down that path. It has been said that you retain about 35% of the things that you only hear. Your retention level goes up if you see and hear what you are being taught. Your highest level of retaining information comes when you get the chance to hear and see and touch the thing you’re trying to learn about. This is why I believe that God wanted me to write this book, because of my hands-on experiences in relationships that caused what I thought I knew in my head to move to experiences in my heart, which has caused me to have compassion for others struggling in relationships. I heard someone say, "Before I care about how much you know, I first want to know how much you care.

My other reason for writing this book is to share truth with you, but I want you to know truth is not just concepts or ideas or words, but a Person, and His name is Jesus. John 1: 14 say, Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me. Jesus did not just say that He knows the truth but He said I AM the truth. Most of the truths that I will be sharing with you, as you already have seen, will come from the Word of God. I choose not to give a lot of my own personal opinion because we all have them. I have found that a lot of times my opinions never helped me. Later on in the book I will talk about some basic truths so that you will know my mindset, why I think a certain way about something. The Bible says, As a man think so is he. I’m not trying to write this book as would a theologian or even a person with a PhD. I am just a son of God learning to walk out this Christian life. BIBLE is an acronym for the words Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth. The world takes a lot of the truths and principles of the Bible and restates them so that they don’t have to take the God of the of the Bible. Why? Because God chasten and corrects those who’s are His to bring them to their higher good and most people do not want that. When you apply the principles of the Bible they work, whether you take the God of the Bible or not. Using these principles, you can get good natural results and become very productive. There are many people who use these principles and achieve great things. But what I have found out is that if you take these principles along with God, you can get supernatural results.

For an example of a principle of a truth, let’s look at the law of gravity. If you take a man and put him on an aircraft carrier and put it in the middle of the ocean and he jumps off the side of the ship, gravity is going to pull him down into the water whether he is black or white, rich or poor, saved or unsaved. Why? Because the law of gravity says what goes up must come down. Now take the same man and put him on that aircraft carrier inside a jet that flies off the boat. There is another law at work called jet propulsion that will overriding the law of gravity, so that when the jet leaves the boat, it is not pulled down into the ocean, but flies away for hundreds or thousands of miles. Yes, the law of gravity is working, but something is overriding it for a period of time. That’s what it is like when you take the God of the Bible Who created the law of gravity; He can override any law at any time to help you get supernatural results. History records there was a day that was almost 24 hours in length. In the book of Joshua we read that Joshua was in a battle he wanted to win, but he knew that night was coming and they would have to stop fighting, so he began to pray for more daylight. I love the fact that he prayed to the God that created day and night the sun and the moon and everything else. Joshua 10: 12-14 says, Then spake Joshua to the LORD in the day when the LORD delivered up the Amorites before the children of Israel, and he said in the sight of Israel, Sun, stand thou still upon Gibeon; and thou, Moon, in the valley of Ajalon. And the sun stood still, and the moon stayed, until the people had avenged themselves upon their enemies. Is not this written in the book of, Jasher? So the sun stood still in the midst of heaven, and hastened not to go down about a whole day. And there was no day like that before it or after it that the LORD hearkened unto the voice of a man: for the LORD fought for Israel. Now the amazing thing about that to me was that I learned in school that the sun does not move, but the world revolves around the sun. So in my mind God had to stop the whole planet earth from spinning to cause the sun to be in the same place so that Joshua could have sunlight. Or maybe God stopped the world from spinning at its normal rate and slowed it down so much it seemed to have stopped. If that was the case, why didn’t everything fly off the plant, because the revolution of the earth is part of the reason we have gravity? God can take a prayer that is not scientifically correct and override His laws to get His will done. Let me get back to the purpose of this book—to help you understand that God created all of us with hidden treasures so that there is value in everyone. 2 Corinthians 4: 7 says, But we have this treasure in earthen vessels that the excellency of the power may be of God and not of us. In quoting this scripture, I don’t want to take it out of context, but I am using it to make a point. The treasure that this Scripture is talking about is the person of the Holy Spirit placed in every believer. The Bible continually talks about gifts, treasure, and talents in us. Proverbs 18: 16 says, A man’s gift will maketh room for him, and bringth him before great men. God is the One Who gives us these gifts