The Real Reason Women Can’T Find a Good Man

By Bruce Ramsey

Know yourself, respect yourself, and if he wants your magic, you make him work.

Bruce Ramsey shares that message and others in this eye-opening guide for women who think all good men are taken.

Drawing on his past relationships and daily observations, he shares insights on how women can:

attract men by being confident and independent;
avoid being used by unscrupulous men; and
enhance your self-respect and self-esteem.

He also shares ways to spot the type of men to avoid, including weirdos, potential serial killers, or one of those stalkers that youll never be able to escape.

Women must recognize the power they hold over menand then exercise that power to find a man that will treat them right. Find out how to do it with the lessons and insights in The Real Reason Women Cant Find a Good Man.

• Language: English
• Publisher: iUniverse
• Release date: Jun 25, 2018
• ISBN: 9781532047060

Bruce Ramsey

Bruce Ramsey was raised in the Bronx, works and Queens, and lives in Long Island, New York. He is self-educated as the result of many life experiences, and he has a passion for the topic of love and relationships. This is his first book.

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Copyright © 2018 Bruce Ramsey.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

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Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

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ISBN: 978-1-5320-4705-3 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5320-4707-7 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5320-4706-0 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2018905227

iUniverse rev. date:  06/23/2018

Contents

The Reason Women Can’t Find a Good Man

You Don’t Know How Much Power You Have

You Don’t Understand Men and Their True Nature

You Prefer Bad Boys over Good Guys

How Much Is Your Magic Worth?

You Don’t Know What Real Love Is

Yank on His Chain

You Don’t Know Men Like Men Know Women

How Much Is Your Magic Worth?

With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility

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Women Don’t Want a Good Man

Women Can’t Control Their Emotions

How Much Do You Love You?

Good Men Can’t Be Found

Ten Reasons Women Can’t Find a Good Man

Author’s Profile

Even When You Think You Know, You Don’t

The Real Reason Women Can’t Find a Good Man

Epilogue

About The Author

Part One

The Reason Women Can’t Find a Good Man

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MOST WOMEN REALLY DON’T know who they are. As a woman, you need certain tools when you’re dealing with men. And you need to know who you are, meaning: Do you know what kind of man you want? Do you know what kind of man you don’t want? Ladies, you might want to be prepared when you’re dealing with men. If you know who you are, you might care about yourself just enough to care about what kind of man you let into your world. If you know you, it’s so easy not to get into a situation that can’t be fixed, for example.

Ladies, did you know that men have a gift that enables us to spot the fact that you don’t have enough love for yourself to fend off the onslaught of pressure that comes when we’re chasing you. For example, he may be just nice enough to play the right songs—really, whatever it takes. And when men realize that you don’t have enough love for yourself, it gets worse.

Ladies, you don’t want this situation to get out of control. If you know you, it’s easy to not be taken advantage of. You could be in such a good place. You have no regrets for anything that you do. If you know you, men will recognize it right out of the gate, and, ladies, you can’t believe how effective this is. It will set the bar for how he has to deal with you. Men are only going to do to you what you let them get away with. If you notice, I didn’t say what they do. I said what you let them get away with. This is a key point.

If you know you, men will show you the kind of love you show yourself. They will have no choice. Have you ever met a man who approached you and just said all the wrong things, didn’t try to make you laugh, or just came straight out and started beating on you? Of course you haven’t. And that’s because men only do what you let men do. This is why that first, How are you doing? is respectful and nice. He has to be cool enough to keep you interested for as long as it takes.

Now ask yourself: Where did it go wrong? What happened? Some women make excuses, and some even blame themselves. So, sad ladies, I’m going to help you understand that if you know yourself, you would never be worried about how you’re going to find a good man. If you want a good man, ladies, find out what you want first. Start there, and watch how easy it starts. Men will see your confidence from two blocks away, and, ladies, it’s absolutely attractive. But unless you know yourself, you don’t stand a chance against men. I’m sorry to break the news to you, but no matter how strong you are or how much game you have or how many men you think you have dealt with, you will lose every single time if you don’t know you.

It is not a game. I’m really concerned. All you have to do is check out any talk show these days, and you will see exactly what I mean. I’m tired of hearing that famous saying: I love him. It makes my stomach hurt when I hear this craziness. I will make it my business to make sure that the woman who wants to know will know, and maybe the ones who don’t want to know will get passed down some of these jewels. It’s all for your safety and protection, and it will make you better as a woman and a mother, a wife, a friend, and pretty much everything that a real woman is. I love women.

You Don’t Know How Much Power You Have

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WOMEN DON’T KNOW HOW much power they have. From the beginning of time, the history of strong and powerful women has been told throughout the ages and will always be told. There are stories of women who took down emperors and took over kingdoms—all by using the power that all women are born with.

Ladies, you have been in a situation when a man approaches you; it could be for any reason. The point is this is when you do not realize you have power over him. At that very moment, that man is giving up his power. I know it’s hard to figure out, but I’m going to try and make it clear. Women, if a man has ever taken you out to dinner, taken you shopping, or even brought you flowers, that gesture was a small demonstration of the power you have. Men only do what we do for one reason only. I am writing this book because a lot of women don’t know that. The power comes from a woman showing her confidence. Women who exude confidence are a force that’s not easy to deal with.

Why do you think women who have it together have the hardest time finding a good man? It’s not because they’re not out there. Instead, it’s because the bar has been set so high that the average man who does not have his affairs in order will be a little reluctant to approach this type of woman. This is where I need you to be, ladies—filled with the kind of confidence that you need to become stronger and more independent.

Most women don’t even have a bar that they set for dealing with men. You can’t just take them as they come and deal with them like they’re not all the same, because the truth is that all men are. Your power will expose the unworthy, so there will be only room for the men who deserve to be in your world. Ladies, I can’t say enough about how much power you have. I understand that you have to go through things in life, but you don’t have to put yourself in a situation that you have absolute no control over. It’s not smart when you are dealing with men. Your power as a woman is pure confidence in who you are and what you want out of men and life. How can you get what you want if you don’t know what you want or, better yet, if you don’t know who you are? It’s not easy.

Being a woman is a huge responsibility. There are a lot of women making it harder for other women to find a good man because they are lost and don’t know about their power. This is where the responsible ones have to set the example for the younger women.

Men are not going to tell you how much power you have; it would defeat the purpose. Men need you not knowing about your power—all the better to take advantage of you. The more power you have, the less chance you have of ending up in a situation you have no control over. You don’t want to be in that type of situation. You want to be in control of not only that guy you’re dealing with but the situation as a whole. Project your power, ladies; it’s the only way to be sure you don’t end up in the wrong hands.

Your power is there for your protection against men, and you need it—trust me. It’s why it was given to you, but if you need an example of the kind of power I’m talking about, think about this: How many women have ever had a man chase them? Or try to buy their attention? There may even be some cases out there when some women have had men kill for them. This, ladies, is the power of women. Think about how many times you’ve seen a man do insane things all in the name of woman. Some women realize that they have power and take advantage of men. Responsibility, ladies, is all that is required in order to play this game, and believe me, it is a game. It’s a game of win or lose. If you don’t know how to play, you’re going to lose every time. Men are playing for keeps. They want everything you have and then some. Why make it easy for men? Women give away so much of their power to men, and before you know it, he has your mind, body, and soul under his control. Watch an episode of any daytime talk show, and you can see what I mean when I say women give away their power to men.

A lot of women blame men for abusing them. It’s horrible, but women have to understand that men prey on women who don’t have a clue. I’m not condoning this in any way; I’m just trying to explain the reason for the behavior. Ladies, this why you need this book to help you understand your power as women. Men are not going to give this to you, and unfortunately, your mom may not know about this, because a man would have to have given these jewels to her to pass along to you.

Some may want to question my motivation for wanting to let women in on how much power they have. My motivation is the simple fact that I love my mom. Every man has a mom, sister, niece, aunt, or female friend. They would agree that they would not want anyone they cared about getting trapped in a relationship. Ladies, your power prevents this from happening. It’s not a foolproof way to avoid being caught up with the wrong man, but it will be better to have something than nothing.

Confidence. I can’t say enough about this. It is your best defense against men who only want your magic. Your self-respect will set the bar. Your self-esteem will make sure that if a man doesn’t treat you better than you treat yourself, it’s instantly recognized and checked. The kind of power that women have can make the strongest man weak, the smartest man dumb, and the most out-of-control man calm. Men don’t have a clue when it comes to women. Men have to be taught all over again. Like boys have to learn from their mothers, men have to learn from the woman they deal with. And yes, ladies, you have to teach men how you want to be treated. It’s a bonus if he already knows or has a clue, but the worst thing you could do is assume that a man knows how you want him to treat you. Men don’t care. It’s up to you to make him care about you, your feelings, and everything else that comes with making you happy. This is when your power is to be used on him.

Demand what you want. Sometimes you may have to take what you want from him in order to get him to respect your situation. You may have to take control of the situation all together. You can still let him play his alpha role as your man, but he may need to be guided in the right direction. Your power is what makes it easy to deal with men and keep them under control. At the same time, a woman who doesn’t realize that she has power can make dealing with men that much harder. A man who realizes you are unaware of the power you have over him may take advantage of you.

Women who know their power get what they want, while women who are unaware of it will get whatever a man dictates to her. My theory is this: If you know who you are, it becomes easy to separate the men from the boys. If you know who you are, you will know what you don’t want. Most women can’t tell you what kind of man they want. I believe that’s because most women don’t know themselves well enough to know what’s good for them and what’s bad for them.

Maybe you were used to a certain type of guy, and that’s all you’re accustomed to dealing with. It’s simple math. If you display your power to a man, he will respect it or move on to the next one. But if you don’t, he’s going to make you wish you had. And don’t think that because you think your power is so great that a man is going to change or do what you want him to just because you think you put it on him. Make no mistake. Unless your power is displayed on day one, your power becomes useless. This is why it so hard for women to understand why he doesn’t call the next day.

You Don’t Understand Men and Their True Nature

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THE TRUE NATURE OF a man is simple. Men hunt women, and that’s what all men do. It’s all men want to do. It’s why men get out of bed in the morning. If women didn’t mind stinky breath and bad teeth, men probably wouldn’t brush. Men dress well, smell good, get rich, and buy big toys just to capture a woman’s attention. Men try to make sure that the hunt is easy. Whether they are targeting the weakest out the bunch or the dumbest, they view it as the same thing. A man will flaunt his cash, his car, or his looks—whatever it takes to make that particular hunt easy. All hunts are different. Some get away, but a lot don’t.

A man will put his assets in place and on display just for a woman. Men use these things to their advantage. A man’s mission in life is to get rich, so he can get the woman of his dreams. It’s hard for a man to respect a woman who doesn’t respect herself. This is how men work if you don’t show a man something, meaning that you make him accountable for his actions. And believe it or not, this will make the difference in how a man will talk to you and treat you.

You can’t show weakness when you’re dealing with men. It comes down to what you project to him. Men feed off what you show them and what limits you set for them. Give him a foot, and he will take ten feet. Remember that it’s important to show him something when he thinks you’re the kind of woman who gets disrespected. Show him something if he thinks you’re passive. Show him something if he makes a mistake and thinks he can put his hands on you. If he thinks he has the right to treat you any less than he would treat his own mother, show him something. Ladies, trust me when I say it makes a world a difference to him if he knows that you’re going to be a problem if he decides to cross any lines. Make him work for your attention. If he feels that you’re easy, he will treat you as such.

Some women think for some reason that they can change men. The truth is that if he doesn’t want to change, he won’t. It’s just a fact about men that woman have to realize and accept. It’s in a man’s nature to chase woman. Men are on a never-ending mission to catch as many women as he possibly can. And with that in mind, men can’t afford to waste time. That’s why men prey on women who don’t know about men or themselves. So instead of asking why he is this way or why he did that, why not just focus on what to do when you find yourself in a situation that will not benefit you?

I want to show women who want to know how to be safe. I want to make sure that daughters are taught to protect themselves and have the jewels needed to navigate through life unharmed. The most important lesson is that women need to protect themselves. Women should want to take heed, because these jewels are coming from a man who knows—a man who has experienced these situations for himself. I’m a witness to most of it. No one wants a person who doesn’t stand up for herself, and depending on whom you’re dealing with, a man might take advantage of that. A man’s nature is to hunt you down and devour you. Just think of men as a lion in the jungle hunting, stalking you, looking for any weakness that could be exploited. If you have ever watched a nature show, you may have seen that lions would love to take down a big kill, but it’s too much work and the risk is great.