Who We Know: The Power of Physical and Digital Networks in Our Lives

By Kasra Khalili

Who We Know: The Power of Physical and Digital Networks in Our Lives is a deep dive into our personal and business networks to make more authentic purpose-driven connections. It analyzes the

• Language: English
• Publisher: New Degree Press
• Release date: Sep 15, 2021
• ISBN: 9781636767710

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Who We Know

Who We Know

The Power of Physical and Digital Networks in Our Lives

Kasra Khalili

New Degree Press

Copyright © 2021 Kasra Khalili

All rights reserved.

Who We Know

The Power of Physical and Digital Networks in Our Lives

ISBN

978-1-63676-769-7 Paperback

978-1-63676-770-3 Kindle Ebook

978-1-63676-771-0 Ebook

This book is dedicated to my father, Amir Jamshid Khalili. It is because of you and Maman that I am where I am today. Thank you for your sacrifices and continuing to watch over me. Love you, Baba.

Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1.

Getting Connected

Chapter 2.

Web of Networks

Chapter 3.

Life’s Crossroads

Chapter 4.

Network Effects

Chapter 5.

Measure Your Value

Chapter 6.

Give First, Network Later

Chapter 7.

Influenced Choices

Chapter 8.

Who You Know

Appendix

Acknowledgments

Introduction

Every success story is a tale of adaption, revision, and change.

Richard Branson

Who We Know

My family and I immigrated here from Iran when I was only five years old. My mother had been traveling back and forth for a number of years, working to secure her citizenship to help establish a better start for our family. Our family of four—my mother, father, sister, and me—got on a plane and set our sights on the United States.

For me, it was unclear what we were doing so far from home. I still remember the plane ride, arriving at the airport, watching people speak around me but not understanding what they were saying; it felt odd and I believe that heightened awareness allowed me to remember it to this day.

My parents took a huge risk leaving their livelihood, friends, and family behind to start a new life in a new country. They did not take this move lightly and took relentless action to ensure it would be worth the sacrifices. From the moment we arrived, my parents pursued a life of entrepreneurship that would go to teach me invaluable lessons in problem-solving, grit, fear, uncertainty, and passion.

Growing up in family businesses isn’t exactly a young boy’s dream. It means you’re working most weekends, conversations are mainly business related, and change is your normal—for better or worse.

The hard work paid off for my parents. While on that entrepreneurial roller coaster ride, we moved five times before I was eighteen, mostly to better homes, and continued to be rewarded for persistence through a number of challenging times.

One thing that stood out to me in almost every business my parents launched was the cap of their growth. It always seemed their hard work could get them to a successful state, but never too far beyond it. What I came to realize was just how un-networked they really were. With language, credentials, and a bit of pride serving as barriers, getting connected wasn’t exactly easy. The people we knew were the ones in the Iranian community. They were simply who my parents trusted and who trusted them. There were no Alumnus association, business groups, or community networks for them to tap into. For the time being, my parents focused on one thing and one thing only: getting me to college.

Fast forward through the great experiences of college and we arrive at graduation. Upon graduating college from a small school in Hammond, LA, I set out to start my career in Occupational, Safety, Health, and Environment. I found myself approaching the moment so many graduates before me looked forward to, using the learnings of my degree to thrust myself into a career that would surely be a success. Finding this dream job became more and more unlikely as the endless days of applying yielded no more than a few interviews.

I needed an introduction. Someone who could help me get my foot in the door. I thought of myself as fairly personable and the idea of meeting new people seemed easy enough.

I couldn’t have been more wrong.

I quickly learned the meaning of the phrase, It’s not what you know, it’s who you know; wise words from my professor, Dr. Lawrence Mauerman. Landing my first role in the safety and health field ended up relying heavily on who I knew, as it was the referral from my then-girlfriend’s dad’s friend. Who knew.

After some progress within that role, I transitioned out to a corporate position working directly on policy and steadily moved up in that company until my departure to launch my start-up, Mintor. More on that later.

What I experienced while working at these companies was simple: networks are undeniably powerful.

Time and time again—from obtaining a job, landing a sale, finding a cofounder, or the relationships we’re in—the people we’re associated with through networks we come in contact with drive the very direction of our lives.

There comes a moment in life where you become aware of a passion, a driving force within you to do more and follow your gut. For me, this was the realization I was and have always been an entrepreneur at heart, molded by my parents through tirelessly working in the businesses as a young kid—but we can go into that another time.

Meeting People Who Inspired Me

A transition I had was one goal in mind when I understood entrepreneurship would be my path: get connected, learn from others, and give back constantly.

Simple enough, right?

I started like any young networker would: I made business cards, attended events in my city, reached out to the small business development centers, signed up for webinars and seminars, and reached out constantly to people on LinkedIn.

What happened? The small business centers seemed to be talking right past me and delivering their pitch as to what I should do to start a business. Write this business plan, they said. Show us how your business will operate over the next five years. It all seemed too much. I took calls and went to coffee with professionals from every industry imaginable. Meetups went as well as showing up to a new school halfway through the year—everyone had their cliques and the silos were built. After the typical what do you do? question, it became apparent to the person I wasn’t in a position to help them and we awkwardly dragged the conversation until they found their way out. Trusty LinkedIn, as powerful a tool as it is, only helped me build mismatched, intention-lacking, and sales-driven connections that never felt authentic.

As someone who is very personable, grew up in a restaurant serving, president of my fraternity, and led large teams across the country, I was at a loss. Connecting was something I was good at—or so I thought.

It became clear to me that intent was non-existent or widely misunderstood. Either way, it left myself and so many other entrepreneurs with unnecessary barriers to build connections.

After almost a year of reaching out and meeting well over one hundred people, I had a turning point. Riding the failure of a safety consulting business, a breakup, and uncertainty about where my next job will be, I took a trip to visit family in Los Angeles to clear my head and reset.

What I found was my friend, my mentor, and my cousin, Amir.

Amir was someone I’d always admired growing up but never truly built a relationship with. Within moments it became clear he was who I needed to meet again. His guidance and mentorship to me was a pivotal moment of my life when I relearned so much of how I approached my work.

That guidance led me deeper into the networking space. I went on to launch Mintor and became the chapter director of Startup Grind in Baton Rouge (where I host monthly networking events), and now I can share those experiences, hacks, and stories in this book. Building sustainable relationships guided by clear intentions and purpose has turned into my passion.

I learned giving can be the most powerful tool there is and all of us have something to give. I learned people seek connection now more than ever and each of us can find those connections as long as we know where to look.

Over the past year, I’ve sought out, spoken to, and researched some of the most successful entrepreneurs, psychologists, super-connectors, and executives to learn how the power of giving first can help us all build sustainable and valuable networks.

It hurt me to find I was being held back by this. Inspired by an entrepreneurial upbringing, the art of connection became my sole focus. Understanding the network effects around us gave me an appreciation for the influence of those people we come in contact with throughout our lives; it’s something we all should have an opportunity to master, given the availability of technology and social networks.

What Is Networking?

Networking is like farming, said Owen Swift, sales consultant with Terumo BCT. You need to plant your seeds well in advance of the harvest.

Think of networking simply as talking with people, getting to know them, and letting them get to know you. Networking is all about building and maintaining professional relationships.

According to new LinkedIn global survey results, almost 80 percent of professionals consider professional networking to be important to career success. Not only that, but 70 percent of people in 2016 were hired at a company where they had a connection. Despite the importance of networking, the survey revealed gaps in how professionals feel vs. their behavior and how they stay in touch with their network.

Networking attitudes don’t match networking behaviors:

• Thirty-eight percent globally said they find it hard to stay in touch with their network.

• The leading cause? Nearly half (49 percent) globally say it’s because they don’t have enough time.

• Interestingly, despite the majority (79 percent) globally agreeing professional networking is valuable for career progression, less than half (48 percent) globally say they keep in touch with their network when things are going well in their career.

• Nearly two-thirds (61 percent) of professionals globally agree regular online interaction with their professional network can lead the way to possible job opportunities.

These statistics show us at a time where being connected is as important as ever. It holds true when