The Clit

By Queen Tati

The Black Queen. Lesbian. Christian.'s within the LGBTQ community are missing something critical; adequate and accurate representation in society. This book written by Queen Tati touches on the journey of a group of young black lesbians trying to find themselves in this world. As the main character, Alicia embarks on a journey many people know all too well - college. She is accompanied by her best friend and secret lover, Angel. This year is unlike any other for these lovers because they have freedom. Immediately connecting with a group of ladies that begin the unbreakable bond of friendship. Courtney, Jezebel, and Tiara provides Alicia and Angel with a sense of acceptance and understanding in a world where they are taught their first difficult lesson in life; the freedom given does not always result in the happiness expected.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Sep 27, 2021
• ISBN: 9781667805139

Book preview

Chapter 1: The Beginning

August 29th was such a beautiful day; the sun was shining, birds were chirping, and the wind was blowing through my locs. The day is special because I finally get to leave the nest and start my college life. I heard a lot about the college experience but this is my time to create my own. The name is Alicia by the way. I’m from Decatur, Georgia. I came to New York with my best friend Angel. We have been friends since I can remember and lovers since 7th grade. For years we have been hiding our secret from our families. Down south being a lesbian is unacceptable especially in Angel’s household. See, her father is a preacher and he plays no games, he preaches the Word in his sleep, trust me, I’ve heard him.

Angel and I texted the whole ride, so excited to finally be together and able to be free because we all know New York is the place of change. After 15 long hours, we made it to the Big Apple. I see New York in the movies, but it’s nothing compared to looking at it firsthand. So many big buildings and bridges everywhere, and don’t let me get started on the traffic.

Decatur traffic is a ghost town in comparison to the bumper-to-bumper sitting traffic in this big ass city. The people driving up here are rude as fuck. They always jumping in front of you, stay honking, and practically drive on your damn bumper. I will never drive here, the subway will be my best friend, for sure. Thankfully, once we got out of the main city and into Queens the traffic calmed down, these people were still rude but at least more patient.

Around 1 p.m., we arrive at the Crayton University campus in Queens. The kind officers at the gate gave us directions to Dollis Hall where we are going to live our freshman year. Checking in to get our dorm keys, we are surrounded by all types of people. It’s so interesting to see the different cultures New York offers. We now live in a double on the 4th floor, S04228. My family is known for helping the new freshman of the family unpack everything out of the suitcases and setting up your entire room before leaving. We did it with my oldest sister and now my mom is doing it with me. It’s worse now because we have Angel and her family is here too. I know they have been crying about this day all our lives. Finally, after a few hours, we say our goodbyes to our parents and then settle in our rooms. Before leaving, Angel’s father said a few prayers to watch over us. When he starts it’s hard to stop him; no one dares to interrupt.

Angel wants to go around and meet a few people. I always give her what she wants, so I couldn’t say no. We start in our suite, they seem like nice people. We leave out and walk to the door on our right. Our new neighbors open the door after we knock a few times. That’s where we met Jezebel and Courtney. Jezebel was so excited to meet us, but Courtney was a little shy.

They look like complete opposites. How are they going to get along? That was honestly the first thing I could think of. Jezebel is welcoming and very nice, but she is loud and can seem a tad over the top at times. Courtney on the other hand looks like a timid, go with the flow, but really prefers to be alone type of girl. So this is going to be an interesting combination. But I am here for it, who am I to judge?

They invite us in and we all sit down in the common room to talk. Courtney is from D.C. and Jezebel is from Brooklyn. She knows about all the hot spots and promises to take us out once everything is settled. Little did we know that these two girls would become a huge part of our lives. We stayed there until it was time for the floor meeting at 9 p.m. The meeting lasted about an hour, everyone just getting to know our RA’s and other people on the floor. At 10, Alicia and I head back to our room because orientation is early the next morning.

We wake up at 8 a.m. to get dressed for orientation. We meet Jezebel and Courtney at the elevator and our RA in the lobby. All of us head to Greenwood Arena where we split up into groups by our major. I love sports and to talk, so I joined the Sport Management program. Angel on the other hand loves children. She wants to be a teacher, so she majored in Early Childhood Development. Courtney is all about Criminal Justice. We find out later why that was so important to her. Jezebel has the same major as me, but for a different reason, if you know what I mean.

As everyone splits up after orientation, I give Angel a slight kiss and grab her butt. Southern girls have the biggest butts, that was one thing that I loved about her. I leave with Jezebel, and Angel and Courtney go their separate ways.

As Jezebel and I walk to our next destination she says, I knew it was something going on between ya. I laugh and just keep walking. She asks me if our parents know. I turn around and tell her, Hell no, you think they let us live in the same dorm at the same college if they knew? As we proceed toward Reds Hall I notice her looking at this girl across the way. I tap her and ask, You like girls too? Shit, I like ‘em all! she replies. I came to find out that Jezebel was a tad free-spirited. She likes both men and women, but she leans more towards women she says. She goes wherever the attention sways at the moment. I would kill Angel if she ever thought she was going to live like that, but to each her own I always say. Shit, who am I to judge when I am too scared to tell my own parents that I’m in love with my best friend?

We arrive in Reds Hall where we meet our deans and advisors. I can hardly remember what they said because Jezebel and I were yapping the whole time. Around 1 p.m. everything is over and we meet back up with the girls. We all go back to our room because it’s more private and less noisy.

Back in the room we watch Maury on TV. When he is on you better be quiet or prepare for a curse out. That’s my shit! yells Courtney. Everyone looks at her with shock. I see someone’s getting comfortable, Angel states.

Everyone laughs, but I can’t help thinking that I do not understand why all these ladies love watching this show. I mean do not get me wrong it is funny, but I am confused as to why these females know their truth, but still appear on this show to be embarrassed publicly about their hoe-ish tendencies. I dare not to speak about any of this with these girls. I just might get my head chopped off.

As we watch, I get in the bed with Angel and let Jezebel and Courtney lay in mine. During the commercials is the only time we talk. After the show goes off, we get to know each other a little more. So what’s your story Jezebel? I ask.

Jezebel stands up and starts to let it all out. "Well, I was born and raised in Brooklyn. I just got out of a 3 year relationship with a woman named Lauren. I met her as a sophomore in high school. For years we have been inseparable. She was the girl I came out with when I told my mom I was into girls. My mom was mad as hell when I told her. Well, I actually didn’t tell her, she found out through my sister, but either way I can tell you one thing, she was not a happy camper.

Somehow, Lauren must have made some type of impact on her. My mom let her come over every weekend, and she spent the night too, well once. I loved that girl, and my family was fond of her too."

So what happened? Angel asks.

One day I decided to ‘argue myself out of the relationship’ as Lauren says. Let me let you guys in on a little secret, she was 6 years older than me. When we met I was 16 she was 23.

Hold the fuck up! Are you serious? Courtney says.

Yes! How did you end up getting that? I ask.

"Well, when we met and started to talk, age was never the topic of conversation. One day she asked, and I told her, I couldn’t lie. She was so shocked, but by then it was too late feelings were way too deep. I end up meeting her friends, sisters, and a few others. Us together, shit I would do anything to get that back. I was so young and dumb that I didn’t know when to just shut the hell up. But, my best friend now is what set everything off after ‘I broke up with myself’ as Lauren likes to tell it. She figured I wanted to be with her more, and I started to act different so she changed up on me in return.

Lauren and I still talk occasionally, but she in a relationship and I am not one to mess up those. She always tells me, ‘if we meant to be, we will be.’ I hated that shit. Why you just can’t let me have you now?

Not to be rude but, is that why you act this way now? I said.

What you mean? Jezebel replies.

You are a tad free- spirited, if you know what I mean. I say.

Well, to be honest, after her I didn’t want anybody else. It was either her or no one. I tried looking for people who acted like her, but I never found them. So a few months went on and I just decided to do me. I’m trying to chill, but I can’t. Other people’s attention makes me forget about all the pain I’m in ya’ know. Jezebel has a far off look as she talks about Lauren and how she feels about it all now. She catches herself before laying back on the bed.

After her story, she seems different; we definitely struck a nerve. I could understand because if Angel and I ever parted, I would lose my mind too. Jezebel kept staring at the ceiling. I think she was trying to hold back her tears as she reminisced about the good times she had with Lauren. I wanted to meet this girl because if she changed a girl like this, she had to be something special. But I knew to get that out my head because that wasn’t going to happen.

Welp, Courtney it’s your turn! Angel says.

For what? she replies.

To tell your story. Duh! Angel says.

I don’t know. Nobody wants to hear my story, she says with her eyes looking down.

Girl, if I had to tell mine, you have to tell yours. Don’t worry, no one is going to judge you. If they do, I beat that ass, I gotchu, Jezebel says proudly.

Ok, here it goes, Courtney says. She sits up on the bed holding onto the pillow and starts to talk.

As ya’ know I am from D.C., NE to be exact. However, I went to school in SE. When I was about 15, I met this woman. That was around the time my best friend’s little sis passed away. I dare not to go into that being as though I just got over it. This woman did everything for me. If I wanted jewelry she bought it, clothes she got it. There was nothing I didn’t get. She was a little older than me too. I like my women old.

Wait! You a lesbian, damn I would have never guessed it! I said.

Yea, well the lesbian world isn’t all fun and games, Courtney whispers.

Well, duh! I say.

Shut up and let her continue her story bae! Angel retorts.

"Well my woman name was Tiffany. She was 15 years older than me. At first everything was cool. We were so in love. I stayed over her house all the time. But, one day things changed, and it just hasn’t been the same since.

"One day I came over with her daughter, Jazzy. We went to the same school. Yea I know, I don’t know how I ended up with one of my friends’ mother either. Anyway, Tiff had a few people over and I tried to kiss her, but she moved away from me. I didn’t feel like arguing because that