Hold On For Deer Life

By Andrew Rolston

On the surface, Bucky has everything he needs. A beautiful family, a humble home, and the rural life he has always wanted. Then again, he's a deer. One night, while out looking for his delinquent daughter, he comes across a self-destructive man whose honesty Bucky finds sad yet strangely refreshing. But when his only fawn, Beauty, starts coming home late after hanging out with the wrong crowd, the cracks begin to appear, and fate is about to push something through one of those cracks he never expected. So begins a chain of events poised to do some quality control in Bucky's own circle in a unique, unusual, and unforgettable commingling of species.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Nov 29, 2021
• ISBN: 9781667817842

Book preview

Hold on for Deer Life

Andrew Rolston

Copyright © Andrew Rolston, 2021

All rights reserved

978-1-66-781784-2

Hold on for Deer Life

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, events, and incidents are either the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons or deer, living or deceased, or actual events is entirely coincidental and downright ridiculous.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1: Downright Ridiculous

Chapter 2: Our Rebellious Daughter

Chapter 3: Very Blind

Chapter 4: Life Was Good

Chapter 5: The Dang Woods

Chapter 6: Crisis Averted…Or So I Thought

Chapter 7: Don’t Eat Them

Chapter 8: This Was Serious

Chapter 9: I Can Do That

Chapter 10: I’m So, So Sorry

Chapter 11: An All-You-Can-Eat Buffet in the Buff

Chapter 12: Satisfied with the Outcome of the Confrontation

Chapter 1

Downright Ridiculous

What to do? What to do about my rebellious adolescent daughter? Beauty had been the perfect child. Happy. Healthy. Smart. Obedient. Respectful. She and I did lots of things together. We romped and frolicked in the meadow, sometimes chasing butterflies, playing tag. We played hide-and-seek in the woods. We foraged in the forest for acorns. Beauty would snort with delight whenever she stumbled upon a treasure trove of those delicious morsels, always making sure that we saved some for her mother. She would accompany me on my trips to Old Man Nelson’s feeding trough, where he would occasionally have some ground corn that was offered to get us through the rough winters. Beauty had been a daddy’s girl, a loyal and loving sidekick.

That relationship had vanished recently as she was determined to become independent and establish her own identity as a young doe. I’d heard stories before about angelic fawns that had turned into hellions in their adolescence. I’d never paid much attention to those warnings, but now that nightmare was staring me in the face. My father had once told me that the only time you know everything is when you are young. That description fit my daughter like a pair of antlers on a hunter’s wall. Yes, as she got older, she would come to the realization that she no longer knew everything—but for now, she was always right and never wrong. The world was her acorn, and her mother and I were simply unwanted obstacles on her road to deerhood.

The beautiful girl who had asked so many questions as a fawn and then as a yearling had suddenly decided that she knew everything. Daddy’s little girl was now a know-it-all, and my wife Arlette and I were stumped as to what to do with our juvenile daughter. She’d gone from an honor roll student to barely getting passing grades. She’d gone from waking up early in anticipation of going to school to skipping school whenever she felt like it, which was much too often. She’d gone from a circle of friendly, responsible friends to hanging out with a group of disreputable delinquents, ignoring the curfew that Arlette and I had imposed more often than not. She’d gone from a respectable young deer to a disrespectful adolescent, often leaving Arlette in tears and me screaming mad.

Now, as she stumbled into our area of the woods in the early morning hours after a night of apparent carousing, I confronted her.

It’s almost five in the morning, Beauty. Where were you? You told us you would be back by nine. What the buck happened?

Not bothering to look at me, Beauty responded, I’m tired, Dad. Can we save the lecture till morning?

"It is the morning, Beauty. We talk about this now. Your mother and I want to know where you were. You told us you were getting together with some of your frolicking teammates. When your mother saw your best friend Whitney’s mother at book club last night, Whitney’s mother said that Whitney was at home studying. And Whitney is the captain of the frolicking team. We presumed that she’d be at any frolicking team get-together. I’ll ask again. Where were you?"

Okay, okay. I was hanging with some new friends. We were in the patch of woods in back of Old Man Nelson’s farm.

Were you drinking again, Beauty? You know what your mother and I told you about drinking.

Just a few slugs of corn mash, Dad. I know what you and Mom told me about drinking, but everyone else was drinking, and I didn’t want to be different. Just a few sips of corn mash. Not even enough to catch a buzz.

And what about breaking curfew? This is the second time this week.

Well, none of the other fawns have curfews, Dad. And I went there with Brittney, and she didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to have to walk through the woods alone at night. You and Mom told me never to do that because it wasn’t safe. The wolves were out. I could hear them howling.

Just because the other fawns don’t have a curfew doesn’t mean that you don’t have to obey your curfew. It still applies. No exceptions. From what I understand, some of your new friends are quite a bit older. Your mother and I would prefer that you hang out with fawns your age. And we don’t care if other fawns your age have curfews or not. We’re responsible for you, not them.

You know what, I’m tired of this inquisition. I’m my own doe now. I’m old enough to do what I want when I want. You and Mom have no right to ask me where I’ve been or what I’ve done. I’m tired of it. Very, very tired of it. Hasta luego!

As Beauty stormed off into the woods, I dug deep into my memories of Spanish class to know that she was bidding me goodbye. Wolves and coyotes or not, she was no

Reviews for Hold On For Deer Life

[forestdrus1602 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This book has some really smart and funny stuff. I really like the ending.

[Makenna · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

This book is weird but also very fun and funny

[tonyalmon · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

A humorous and amusing tail… I mean… tale of deer life

[Seema Ullal · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This is one of the funniest book I have ever read