Prison to Purpose: A Past That Shaped My Future

By Demetrus Coonrod

The doors of the chamber opened, and I was standing right before the federal judge. I knew in my heart that I was about to lose everything: my children, my job, and any hope of a career. I began pleading with God and asking Him for leniency as I tried to replay in my mind how I got to this point. Please, Lord, don't let the judge sentence me to the full extent of the law! I started to feel a sense of panic. My palms began to sweat, and I felt like I was going to pass out and die right in the courtroom. Every lousy thought and image I could imagine about prison began to invade my mind.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Demetrus Coonrod
• Release date: Jan 31, 2022
• ISBN: 9798201121372

Book preview

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DEDICATIONS

This body of work is dedicated to my "shero," my daughter, Shanice Coonrod.

You fought to live and although you are no longer physically here on earth, your presence and inspiration will forever live in my heart.

To my beloved grandmother, Mamie Coonrod,

You were my peace and safety net, I will always hold you near and dear.

You reminded me daily that I could be

and do anything I set my mind to, but I had

to first believe in myself.

As I continue to embark upon this journey,

I know that your energy will always be with me.

With Love,

~Demetrus~

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

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To my beautiful children, who are my heroes. I praise God for allowing you to endure the hard ships, obstacles, and challenges that I placed upon you. It was never my intention to cause you any pain. But with God’s covering, He continues to keep you safe in His arms. I am grateful that my past did not define who you are or hinder you from becoming who God intended you to be. Each of you are simply Amazing and I pray God’s continued blessings on your lives.

Shanice, Alexia, Cherika, Me, Trevon, and Alexis

To my siblings, who stepped up to the plate when I could not do my part,

I am forever appreciative and indebted to you.

You listened to me when nobody else was there, and I am happy to share my new journey alongside you.

To my Uncle Vongo, I owe you the world. You believed in me when I did not see the potential within.

You pushed me to levels I never imagined I would achieve, and when I didn’t think I was good enough, you assured me I was.

To Ma, I thank you for taking me under your wing and treating me as your daughter.

It’s funny because Miguel still thinks he can tell me what to do.

It’s been awesome having Keisha as my older sister; she keeps me on my toes.

To Uncle Nod and Aunt Johnny, you have always been a voice of reason.

I appreciate you more than you know.

Thank you to my writing coach Tamika Johnson, who encouraged me to dig deep into areas of my life that I tried so desperately to suppress.

Your insightful and inspiring words helped guide me through my writing process.

To my Love Bucket, it has been a journey. Thank you for your unyielding support.

Finally, to Zia #1081, we have battled the odds, and you all have shown up continually without hesitation. Your path is illuminated with greatness.

There is no I on this journey, and I took this journey alongside each of you.

Together we will continue to rise.

~Demetrus~

PRELUDE

The doors to the chamber opened, and I was standing right before the federal judge. I knew in my heart that I was about to lose everything: my children, my job, and any hope of a career. I began pleading to God and asking Him for leniency as I tried to replay in my mind how I got to this point. Please, Lord, don’t let the judge sentence me to the full extent of the law! I started to feel a sense of panic. My palms began to sweat, and I felt like I was going to pass out and die right in the courtroom. Every lousy thought and image I could imagine about prison began to invade my mind. Will I get killed or threatened while in prison? Will another inmate or guard rape me?

I was feeling defeated, and it didn’t help that I had a public defender who had no desire to fight for my freedom. He didn’t pursue the truth, even though I was his client. I should have defended myself, and maybe I wouldn’t have been standing in the courtroom! But at that moment, I had to hold my thoughts captive and take control of my mind so that I wouldn’t go crazy. I had to remember everything my grandmother taught me and the encouraging words she reminded me of every day.

Judge Curtis Collier took his seat and called my name. Demetrus Coonrod, he began. Do you know you have so much potential, besides going to prison? I shook my head in agreement because I knew I had a lot to offer. But why was I here? I guess this means he is going to let me go free!

Ms. Coonrod, I now sentence you to....

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.

~Romans 8:37~

1 REALITY IS...

page12image1812576 I was born December 30th, 1974, to a teen mom and a father with an entire established family. Yes, my father was married with a daughter and a son on the way. The fam ily joke was that I was the break-up. My parents had four children, and I was the oldest girl.

We lived in impoverished communities where the environment wasn’t always safe. We moved around a lot, and things were not always stable. We lived in a dangerous housing project in East Chattanooga, Tennessee, in a three- bedroom apartment. During that time, I did not recognize the hardship my family faced, even though we were all piled up, sharing bedrooms, and sleeping on the floor. The floor became our comfort zone for sleep, along with a box fan running to tune out all the noise that surrounded