Let's Choose to Stay Together: Make the Choice and Reap the Benefits

By Stacey L. Griffin

The world says marriage isn’t important anymore. But author Stacey L. Griffin believes otherwise. In Let’s Choose to Stay Together, she helps those looking to get married and those already married by providing the necessary tools for success during good and rough times.

Developed to encourage single and married people alike, Griffin reminds you through messages, scriptures, and poetry that a happy, whole, and secure marriage starts with your relationship with God and overflows into every area of your life including relationships with others. God ordained marriages, and he wants them to work out, even the ones where it seems like there’s no hope.

Let’s Choose to Stay Together tells the world that although people often view marriage the same as buying shoes, when they wear out just get new ones, or it seems like a waste of time because of the commitment it takes to remain connected, it’s worth it. You won’t regret the work you put in when you’re both seasoned in age and know you grew old with your spouse through challenges, the kids, and all the beautiful memories because you both intentionally said, “I do.”

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Jun 6, 2022
• ISBN: 9781664267329

Stacey L. Griffin

Stacey L. Griffin has been a wife and mother for more than twenty years. She is not only a lover of God and family, but of marriage and her community.

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Copyright © 2022 Stacey L. Griffin.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

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Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Scripture quotations marked KJV are taken from the King James Version.

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from The Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

ISBN: 978-1-6642-6733-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-6642-6734-3 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-6642-6732-9 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2022909578

WestBow Press rev. date: 6/3/2022

CONTENTS

Introduction

Friendship

Right Choice

Mental Stability

Secrets

Humble Yourself

Fear

Selfless

Communication

Joy

Faithfulness

Dedication

Hard Work

Submission

Equally Yoked

Unity

Complete

Intentional

Building

Love

Love Language

Intimacy

Kindness

Honesty

Believing

Hope

Prayer

Patience

Vulnerable

Finances

Pursue

Chores

Sickness

Temptations

Forgiveness

Forward

Quality Time

Family

Children

Peace

Longevity

Spiritual Warfare

Healthy Marriage

Reflections

Notes

To my wonderful husband, Joseph. He has been a huge support in my life since the moment we met. Through him, I grew closer to God and learned to genuinely love. God has used Joseph to be a light in my darkest moments. My husband has spoken life and prayed over me consistently in our many years of marriage. I am grateful to the Lord for placing him in my life to be my friend, my partner, and my support.

INTRODUCTION

We choose to get married to the person we stand before God, family, and friends with. We choose where the venue will be, the budget, the dress and tux we will wear. We decide what will be on the menu for the reception and who will be standing next to us when we say our I dos. We make a lot of choices in life, and they dictate our outcome in many circumstances. We even get to choose Christ as our Lord and Savior, and that choice has a complete impact on our whole entire life.

We understand that in choosing Christ, we are choosing to lay aside the things of this world and walk righteously. We choose to do good and live a life of integrity when others will not. In our walk with Christ, we choose to love despite circumstances and to honor Him in all we do, so we can gain eternal life and be a positive influence while here on this earth. We have the opportunity to be led by Him, even when it comes to marriage. Even if He is not in our lives when we get married, we can accept the Lord and ask Him to interject immediately.

Many people may feel they did not marry the right person, but to God be the glory, that can be changed. There are many married couples who did not know God when they first came together, and now, they are happy, healthy, and both saved. All things are possible with Christ Jesus. It just starts with making a choice. When that choice is made a mind change, a new way of thinking must take place.

That is why the book is called Let’s Choose to Stay Together. We can choose to stay or choose to go. When we make our choice to stay and work it out, we see in the long run that it was worth it, and it motivates us to do more and do better. The most important part is, you both need to make that choice before you even go down the aisle. That no matter what, we are going to make this marriage work and be successful. Making that choice will help you seek God deeper and keep you from making frivolous mistakes, as well.

For those who are already married, make the choice to stay and stay in prayer together, so that God can work on you both, heal you both, deliver you both, and connect you both, as you come together to connect more with Him. Making the choice does not just benefit us, our marriage, and the kingdom of God, but it shows our children that marriage is still good and worth having.

Remember, God loves His children, and He will not leave or forsake us. He is with us through this journey.

28664.png FRIENDSHIP 28668.png

Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart: so doth

the sweetness of a man’s friend by hearty counsel.

—Proverbs 27:9 (KJV)

F riendship in a marriage is so important. You are going to spend the rest of your life with this person; you want to be able to not just do what married couples do, like pay bills, raise kids, and build a legacy. But you want to be able to just sit around and hang out. You want to be able to say, Hon, come on, let’s go to the amusement park and get some ice cream. My husband and I love just hanging out, something we did before we started our marriage journey. We go for walks so we can have time to bond and chat. We get to talk about what is going on in our hearts and minds, we go for ice cream, and we love bowling and playing pool together. Some couples may even like yelling at sports games together, high-fiving every time their team scores (or else staring each other down because you do not like the same team).

It is nice to be able to come together in God and as husband and wife, but it is so awesome to be able to come together and just have fun as friends, as well. Life cannot be all business, but you want a partner in crime per se, to cut up with and to share life’s struggles. There are times when I tell Joseph we are talking as buddies right now, then we will go back to husband-and-wife mode. One thing we need to realize is when we get older and the kids are grown and there is no one else around but your spouse every day, you have to know how to just be around each other and be friends and lovers because there will not be as many distractions to keep you busy. So, with an intent to be BFFs, it will be that much easier after you retire, and the kids move out. So many times, after the kids are gone and a couple slows down working, they realize they don’t know their spouse and end up divorcing. Let’s break that pattern and build our relationships on God, friendship, and love.

As you read this poem, think about where you stand in looking forward to getting married or in your marriage. Friendship begins before marriage takes place, and the bond should get stronger as the years go on.

A complex process, that’s when the work begins,

Always great to start off as friends.

The bonding, building, mutual interest in each other’s lives,

Must takes place before we become husbands and wives.

Going in the same direction, seeing where the connection flows,

While in our differences, we support each other’s goals.

Spending time, having fun, growing closer by the moment,

Issues on our minds, we can release and vent.

Without feeling invalid or judged,

Disagreements happen, but we try not to hold a grudge.

Praying and motivating each other to our greatness,

Comforting and encouraging the other when there is distress.

In marriage, these are all important factors,

It is an experience filled with hurt, pain, and laughter.

Obstacles, challenges, dreams fulfilled, and goals achieved,

Naysayers, hope killers, and relationship thieves.

But God ordained marriage from the beginning of time,

A covenant so precious, so beautiful, so