Changing Families, How to Talk to Kids About Divorce: Simple and Effective Stage-by-Stage Communication Techniques to Help Kids Understand, Adjust, and Thrive

By Adam E. Smith

A Guide to Promote Healthy Communication Between You and Your Children During Difficult Times - Help Your Kid Healthily Handle Their Emotions and Adjust to Your Divorce

Kids are often the forgotten victims of divorce. They're too young to understand what's going on, and they feel like they're to blame.

 

Divorce is hard on kids. It can be really confusing when their parents stop living together. They may feel like they're the reason their family is breaking up, and that can lead to a lot of guilt and anxiety. They may also feel scared, alone, or angry.

 

Changing Families is here to help. This book offers simple and effective step-by-step communication techniques that will help kids understand divorce and adjust to the changes in their lives, no matter how old they are. Learn how to talk to your kids, so they feel loved and supported, even during this dif icult time. With this life-changing book, you will:

● Open communication lines: Let your child feel that their emotions are valid and accepted. Help them go through the motions by letting them know they can turn to you.

● Be honest with your kids: Don't let your child feel like they are out of the loop. Be honest with them and, in turn, let them express their thoughts as well.

● Strengthen your relationship with your kids: Discover simple ways to reassure your child that their family isn't gonna disappear forever.

● Discover age-appropriate communication techniques: Whether you're raising a toddler, child, or teenager, this book has got something for you! Make sure that your kids have the best chance to succeed, even after a divorce. With its simple techniques and step-by-step approach, you can help your child through one of the most challenging times of their life.

 

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• Language: English
• Publisher: Adam E. Smith
• Release date: Aug 28, 2022
• ISBN: 9798201625030

Book preview

Book Description

When you got married, you believed that you and your spouse would be together forever, raising your family and living happily ever after. Somewhere along the way, you began your family, but you got tripped up before the happily ever after came true for you and your spouse.

It happens, and it’s never easy for those involved. Having your kids be subjected to the pain of divorce and the transitions that come with it is not something you ever considered as you brought them into this world. You have likely tried to avoid the end of your relationship with your spouse for a long time, both for yourself and for your children, but it’s just not working. Your marriage is broken, and staying together is looking worse for your family than divorcing and moving on.

Divorce looks different for every family, depending on the age of your children, how long you were married, the circumstances that caused the divorce, and how well the parents getting a divorce are able to get along. For parents who are constantly engaged in hostility and conflict, divorce will be stressful, painful, overwhelming, and damaging to your child. For parents who can put their differences aside and put their children first, the divorce will still be rough and painful, but it will be much smoother for their children and help them adapt to their new lifestyle faster than children of conflict and anger.

As for the age of your children, you will learn upon reading that your kids will always need both of their parents’ love, support, and unwavering loyalty no matter how old they are. They will be affected by the divorce, from birth to adulthood. Some age groups take it harder than others, so this book will help you support children in all stages of life. You will also learn all the things to avoid when talking to your child (or in front of them) about your ex and the divorce.

After your divorce, you need to know what happens for your children. How will they visit their other parent? What happens during a custody battle and what kinds of custody will be right for you and your kids? What if your kids are already adults? Will it affect them as much as it does the younger children? Will your infant and toddler even remember what happened?

And how about when you move on and meet someone new? If you are ready to try again with your happily ever after, does that mean it’s okay to introduce your new partner to your child? What if your new partner has children, too? Can your kids handle new stepsiblings?

Helping our kids thrive throughout their lives is one of the most important roles a parent can play. When unfavorable things like divorce affect our children, we need to know what to do to help them heal and adapt to the changes they will experience. In this book, you will learn ways to protect, communicate with, and ultimately help your child survive and thrive during and after your divorce.

Changing Families, How to Talk to Kids About Divorce

Simple and Effective Stage-by-Stage Communication Techniques to Help Kids Understand, Adjust, and Thrive

Adam E. Smith

© Copyright 2022 - All rights reserved.

The content contained within this book may not be reproduced, duplicated or transmitted without direct written permission from the author or the publisher.

Under no circumstances will any blame or legal responsibility be held against the publisher, or author, for any damages, reparation, or monetary loss due to the information contained within this book, either directly or indirectly.

Legal Notice:

This book is copyright protected. It is only for personal use. You cannot amend, distribute, sell, use, quote or paraphrase any part, or the content within this book, without the consent of the author or publisher.

Disclaimer Notice:

Please note the information contained within this document is for educational and entertainment purposes only. All effort has been executed to present accurate, up to date, reliable, complete information. No warranties of any kind are declared or implied. Readers acknowledge that the author is not engaged in the rendering of legal, financial, medical or professional advice. The content within this book has been derived from various sources. Please consult a licensed professional before attempting any techniques outlined in this book.

By reading this document, the reader agrees that under no circumstances is the author responsible for any losses, direct or indirect, that are incurred as a result of the use of the information contained within this document, including, but not limited to, errors, omissions, or inaccuracies.

Table of Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1: The Stages of Divorce

Stage One: Filing Summons and a Petition for Divorce

Stage Two: Temporary Orders

Stage Three: Discovery

Stage Four: Settling Your Case

Stage Five: Filing Final Orders

Your Child and Divorce

What Not to Say to Your Child

Can Divorce Be Beneficial?

Summary

Chapter 2: How to Tell the Kids

Getting Them Through It

Will a Divorce Ruin My Child?

Summary

Chapter 3: Helping Kids Aged 3 and Under

Infants

Transitions

Summary

Chapter 4: Helping Kids Aged 3–5

Summary

Chapter 5: Helping Kids Aged 6–12

Summary

Chapter 6: Helping Kids Aged 13–17

Chapter 7: Talking to Your Adult Children About Divorce

Things Your Adult Children Want You to Know

The Lasting Effects of Divorce

Summary

Chapter 8: Remarriage and Stepparents

How to Introduce Your New Partner

When It’s Not Your Partner

What to Do When New Your Partner Has Kids

Stepsiblings

Tips to Help Your Blended Family Successful

Summary

Chapter 9: External Resources to Help Your Children Cope

Books

Tamar Burris: A Special New Friend

Ashley Simpo: A Kid’s Book About Divorce

Amanda Gummer, PhD, Mark Jordan, and Noah Charney: Shine: Why Don't Moon Fairy and Sun Prince Live Together?

Floyd Cooper: The Ring Bearer

Marie-Sabine Roger and Nathalie Choux: Lou Caribou: Weekdays with Mom, Weekends with Dad

Mindy Avra Portnoy and Valeria Cis: A Tale of Two Sedars

Anastasia Higginbotham: Divorce Is the Worst

Claire Masurel, Kary Macdonald Denton: Two Homes

Tamara Schmitz: Standing on My Own Two Feet: A Child’s Affirmation of Love in the Midst of Divorce

Claudia Harrington, Zoe Persico: My Two Homes

Jennifer Moore-Mallinos and Marta Fabrega: When My Parents Forgot How to Be Friends

Melanie Walsh: Living with Mom and Living with Dad

Sandra Levine and Bryan Langdo: Was It the Chocolate Pudding?

Laurie Krasny Brown and Marc Brown: Dinosaurs Divorce: A Guide for Changing Families

Jeanie Franz Ransom: I Don’t Want to Talk About It

Bonnie Doss: But... What About Me?

Judy Blume: It’s Not the End of the World

Michael S. Prokup: Kids Divorce Workbook

Isolina Ricci, PhD: Mom’s House, Dad’s House for Kids

Movies

Night At The Museum (2006)

It Could Happen To You (1994)

Little Manhattan (2005)

Vice Versa (1988)

Old Dogs (2009)

Mr. Popper’s Penguins (2011)

Cheaper by the Dozen (2022)

Despicable Me 2 (2013)

The Spy Next Door (2009)

Mrs. Doubtfire (1993)

Resources for Adult Children of Divorce

Resources for Parents

Summary

Chapter 10: Dealing With Ugly Divorce

Divorce After Domestic Violence

Abandonment

Infidelity

Summary

Chapter 11: Helping Your Kids Through a Custody Battle

Legal Custody

Sole Legal Custody

Joint Legal Custody

Physical Custody

Sole Physical Custody

Joint or Shared Physical Custody

Parenting Plans

The Impact of a Legal Battle

Infants and Toddlers

3–5 Years

6–8 Years

9–12 Years

12 and older

Alternatives to the Legal Battle

Things to Keep in Mind When Custody Is in Question

Supporting Your Children

Summary

Conclusion

References

Introduction

It’s something no one wishes for in their marriage, let alone their children. Divorce is a heartbreaking, gut wrenching event for everyone involved, even in the best of circumstances. However, divorce is a common occurrence that many people have to deal with. Fortunately, the US divorce rate has been declining. In 2019, the US divorce rate was 7.6 per 1,000 marriages, down from 9.7 in 2009.

However, sometimes divorce is inevitable. When children are involved, this only adds to the emotions their parents are feeling as they separate from someone they love.

But children are resilient, and they are remarkably able to adapt and overcome when needed. They will inspire their parents with their ability to thrive in this situation, but their parents must never forget to offer support when able.

But how can you explain divorce to your children without causing more harm? There’s already so much going on in your life, how are you supposed to deal with that too? What if your divorce ends due to infidelity or abuse? What if their parent suddenly exits their life and never returns? There’s certainly no easy way to explain such a thing to your child. And besides, the youngest children won’t remember the divorce anyway, right?

It’s important to talk to your kids and help them understand to the best of your ability, without causing any ill feelings toward their other parent. They will have questions, fears, and all kinds of emotions that they will need your help to process and come to terms with. Even children who are not capable of conversation with you and your spouse will still need special attention and support during this process. Even if they won’t remember the divorce itself, it will still affect them—now and for the rest of their life.

You will also be dealing with a lot of mental health issues, behavioral problems, and different kinds of regressions for your children. You will need to know what you can do to help them get through those issues and when you need to seek help, as well as what kind