Love and Comedy at the Stately

By Gerald Lopez

Kevin Lawrence’s last living relative has died leaving him an incredible inheritance: The Stately Theater. His Uncle loved the theater and had left it to Kevin in his will. But what did he know about running a theater? He was a struggling writer not a playwright or director? How was he supposed to run an old theater all on his own?
The lawyer told him not to worry as there would be someone to help him. They would soon meet Trudi Trevail when visiting the theater in person. Kevin would also find assistance and possible romance in the form of handsome ex Marine Leonard-Len-Malone.
Trudi had made quite an impression on the small, central Florida town of Stately when she’d performed in a risque show at the theater. Kevin would discover that more than a few citizens of the town had strong connections to The Stately Theater.
Comedic hijinks would ensue when Kevin meets two retired former showgirls who’d worked at The Stately in its glory days.
However there is one big problem, the theater is not what it once was and it hadn’t been for quite some time. The facade of the building as well as the lobby had seen better days. It would all need a significant amount of fixing and renovations. But someone hiding in the shadows and dark corridors of the theater seemed determined to stop Kevin’s restoration plans. Can the mysterious figure be stopped? Trudi, Len, and a new group of friends would do their best to bring down the dastardly villain in order to save the theater.
Even if there was no villain to fight against, Kevin wasn’t sure how he could get everything done that the building needed in order to operate. But as the saying goes, help would show up from the most unexpected of places.
Because as everyone knows—some how, some way, the show must go on. And Kevin was determined that no matter what The Stately would reopen and it would be show time once again.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Gerald Lopez
• Release date: Sep 8, 2022
• ISBN: 9781005317928

Gerald Lopez

Gerald was called to write at various times in his life. When he was young, the writing consisted of plays and short stories. Then he explored the fine arts and literature, earning a bachelor’s degree in the latter while minoring in art history. In his studies he was fascinated by and enjoyed analyzing characters, their personalities and motivations. To him it’s always been the characters who make a story special. Once again writing has taken hold of him. In the past it was just an amusement, but now—for Gerald—writing is a passion to live, eat, and breathe.

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Copyright © 2022 by Gerald Lopez

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Wherever possible, the syntax and spelling in this book follows guidelines set forth in The Chicago Manual of Style, 14th Edition, and in the Merriam-Webster online dictionary.

Cover Art Copyright © 2022 by Gerald Lopez

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Epilogue

Contact the author

About the author

Love and Comedy

At the Stately

Gerald Lopez

Chapter 1

Inheritance

YOU’VE GOT to be kidding me, Kevin Lawrence said as he sat in a slightly uncomfortable leather chair in his recently deceased uncle’s lawyer’s office.

No, Kevin, I’m not kidding, the lawyer said.

Not sure of what to say, Kevin looked at the wall-to-wall bookcases. He wriggled around in his chair, then ran a hand through his wavy jet-black hair which had grown long—to slightly above his shoulders. Finally he spoke.

I’m not really sure what to say, Mr. Dane.

It’s not every day that a twenty-nine-year-old inherits a theater, so I can understand the lack of words. But the first thing I would’ve asked about was if your Uncle Beauregard actually left any funds to maintain the building. Or do you plan on selling the property immediately?

Sell The Stately Theater? Kevin said in a daze. The thought of selling would never have occurred to him. That theater was my uncle’s pride and joy. He always spoke about leaving it to me, but I thought for sure it would go to his husband Alex.

Mr. Alex Chambers received his inheritance, which included both of your Uncle’s homes. Mr. Chambers then promptly booked himself on an around the world cruise, which he is currently enjoying.

He deserves it. Alex and my uncle were together for thirty-years and Alex was there to care for him after the first stroke all the way to the final one. Good for him for taking a well-earned break.

Well I will say Mr. Chambers was happy for you and doesn’t begrudge you one penny of the one hundred and fifty thousand dollars and the theater your uncle left you. Which I have to warn you is not a great deal of money, Kevin.

No, I didn’t think it was, Mr. Dane. He looked at the tall, fit, brown-haired man who was in his mid-to-late forties for a reply, but there was none. The Stately Theater was closed down several years ago, wasn’t it?

Yes, and before that it had been run as a nightclub for a while.

Kevin glanced at the family picture on Mr. Dane’s desk. His wife was an attractive blonde, and they had two cute kids—a boy and a girl.

You’ll have your work cut out for you if you plan to keep The Stately, Mr. Dane said. But Alex said that your uncle used to tell him that when the theater is finally ready for its rebirth help will come from even the most unlikely of places.

Do you think Uncle Beauregard was talking about me?

It’s hard to say, really.

I’ve got to keep my uncle’s dream alive if I can. He wanted to revive the old theater, but his declining health wouldn’t let him. I have always wanted to direct, and I do write.

There you go then, Mr. Dane said. I have time free next weekend to meet you in Stately—the town, show you around the theater, and hand you the keys.

I wouldn’t want to put you out, Mr. Dane. And to be honest I’m not exactly flush with cash at the moment, and your time is money. Better to just hand me the keys.

Nonsense, Mr. Dane said. My wife is already looking forward to going antique shopping while we’re in Stately. It will also be a nice drive, especially since the kids will be staying here with their grandparents while we’re gone. Besides, your uncle left provisions for this situation. In other words my time has already been adequately paid for, so need to worry on that account.

Great then. Next week it is. By the way is there any sort of residence in the building that I can live in while renovating.

There is supposed to be, but not having seen the building myself I can’t tell you what sort of condition the living quarters are in—sorry.

Here’s to next weekend and… adventure.

THE DRIVE to Stately was indeed a nice one, and Kevin enjoyed it. He was by himself, and his car was filled with suitcases full of clothes, shoes, his laptop, and a grocery bag containing snacks. His traveling companion sat silently beside him in the passenger seat with the seatbelt around him.

He was old—only five years younger than Kevin. Lord knows he’d seen better days and was looking worn out. The bald patches on him were growing larger and more evident but his big brown eyes still shimmered in the light. His smile could always brighten even the gloomiest of Kevin’s days.

Turning to his companion, Kevin spoke.

I’m kind of nervous about what we’ll find in Stately. I mean how far gone is too far when it comes to old buildings? And what do I now about restoration work—not a thing. Someone else would say I’m crazy for not just making plans to sell the thing. He quicky peered at his diminutive companion and smiled. One day I’m going to have to find myself a real man, Bobo.

The ragged old yellow teddy bear beside him stood steadfast but silent, glancing forward as if telling Kevin to go boldly forward, no matter what things brought. At least that’s the thought that ran through Kevin’s mind, and it was oddly comforting.

That was the last comforting thought Kevin had in his mind. He’d finally entered Stately proper. Like Bobo the bear, the central Florida town had seen better days. There were enough residents to have an elementary school, high school, and small college but there was no mall. The small downtown survived… barely and it looked slightly run down. There were several empty storefronts, but he spotted some signs of life. A barbeque restaurant that looked busy from what he could tell from the outside, and a thriving bakery slash doughnut shop anchored one corner of the street, in front of which were two police cars.

I guess some stereotypes are true, huh, Bobo? I’m talking about the whole cops and doughnuts thing. Although, really, don’t most folks like doughnuts of some sort?

He patted the bear’s head as he drove into the really bad part of the street at the end of which was the immense three-story theater. There was an empty parking space in front and Kevin took it.

All he could do was stare at the front of the building when he stepped out of the car. His mouth hung open.

Momma says if you keep your mouth open like that the flies will go in and lay eggs in your mouth that’ll make your insides rot, a little black girl wearing pink overalls and had her hair in braids said.

Kevin closed his mouth but still stared at the theater.

Hey, mister, a little boy next to the girl said. I’ll keep an eye on your car for five dollars.

Deacon Henry! a woman who was walking their way with a man by her side said. Now that’s not a very Christian thing to say, is it?

No, Momma, the boy said.

Nah, he’s alright, Kevin said. Can’t fault a guy for trying to earn a buck in a good, honest way.

I like the way that man thinks. That smart boy is our son Deacon, and beside him is Lena, his younger sister. I’m Danton Henry and this is my wife Rechelle.

Pleased to meet you, Kevin said, then shook the tall, muscular man’s hand. I’m Kevin Lawrence the chump who inherited this here place.

You’re Beauregard Lawrence’s nephew, Rechelle, who was slender with long black hair, said.

Are you really fixing to reopen this place out here in the middle of nowhere? Danton said. Did you inherit a few million to go with it?" He laughed.

I wish, Kevin said, then smiled. It’s a big job, isn’t it?

Hell and yeah, Danton said.

Language, please, Rechelle said. The Good Lord can do miracles when it pleases him to do so.

Well that’s what its going to take, Danton said. I’m in construction so I know. I’ve restored old homes in this area, but this building is beyond hope if you ask me.

Rechelle lightly slapped the side of Danton’s head.

Ooo, Momma slapped Daddy on the head, Lena said.

Hush now, child, Rechelle said. Sorry for my husband’s negativity, Kevin. You wouldn’t tear the theater down, would you?

I’d like to keep my uncle’s dream alive if it’s remotely possible.

Well my husband and his crew would be glad to lend you a hand, Rechelle said.

As much as I appreciate the sentiment, I’m not sure I can pay for a big crew to do the work, Kevin said.

That’ alright, Rechelle said. I wasn’t thinking of money but more a payment in kind sort of thing.

What? Danton said. No money.

No way, Deacon said. I need Daddy’s money to buy new shoes and candy.

Hush now, boy, Danton said, then turned to his wife, smiled, and laughed. You’re a wild woman, you know that, Rechelle Henry. And you think fast too—it took me a minute to catch onto you.

I’m still in the dark, Kevin said, then turned to Rechelle. Are you talking about some sort of bartering or trade situation?

I am, Rechelle said. Your uncle used to let our church use the theater for functions including our famous church choral competition.

Momma, Lena said, those were so famous people used to come from all over. Even out of Florida.

She’s right, Kevin said. My uncle told me about those—they were a huge deal. Brought a lot of money to the whole town. Did the competition end when the theater shut down?

Yes, Rechelle said. There’s no other building in town large enough to host the crowds that would attend.

Would the idea of bringing back the choral competition be lucrative enough that people would volunteer to work on the theater for free? Kevin said.

Heck yeah, Danton said. You give our church free use of the facilities for events like the choral competition and people will be glad to volunteer their time. Now it may be slow going, because people still have to do their regular jobs.

I understand, Kevin said. Would other groups want to maybe rent the theater for events? Enough that would help keep us afloat.

It’s a small town, Rechelle said, But, maybe. And the theater was an impressive place back in the day.

Now, who knows? Danton said. No one’s been in the place for some time, I think.

Exchange numbers with him, Daddy, Deacon said.

He has pretty green eyes, Lena said.

What? Danton said. Seven-years-old is too young for you to be looking at men’s eyes.

They all laughed. But someone watching from across the street agreed with Lena. Those green eyes were captivating and about to be captured, they just didn’t know it yet.

Chapter 2

Acquisition

THE HENRY family left, and Kevin was left alone in front of The Stately Theater. He was early, so wasn’t expecting Mr. Dane to be waiting. He had a lot to think about, but at present all he could do was stare at his inheritance.

It was a sunny day, but that didn’t make the building look any brighter. The marquee was broken down and devoid of color; even the name could barely be read, and it hung lower on one side. Plywood was nailed or screwed in front of most of the first floor windows and one of the front doors. Surprisingly neither of the two uncovered windows on the bottom were broken. While the smooth stone and stucco on the exterior was in decent shape, it was in need of a good cleaning and paint job.

Hello, Mr. Dane said as he walked toward Kevin carrying a box. Am I late?

No, I’m early.

Oh geez, Mr. Dane said as he looked up at the theater.

The shorts and snug Polo shirt Mr. Dane wore showed his body off to perfection, and Kevin couldn’t help but notice the lawyer’s perfect ass.

Did you walk here? Kevin said.

I left the car with my wife up the road. Had to walk off the doughnuts we ate.

Were they good?

See for yourself, Mr. Dane said then opened the box he held, to reveal an array of doughnuts, some had pink frosting, others chocolate or sprinkles, and a couple were plain. They stay with you, buddy.

Thank you, Kevin said as he took a strawberry frosted doughnut. "While he ate, he filled Mr. Dane in on his meeting the Henry family.

That was a fortuitous meeting. Can I give you a little free advice?

Please do.

Find yourself a neutral local lawyer. It sounds like the Henry family has good intentions, but just so there are no misunderstandings, it’ll be better for all concerned if you have things in writing. Both parties need to know where they stand in relation to things, such as who has priority use of the theater when it comes to dates and times.

I agree with you completely. If they really are willing to help as much as they say, then of course their choral competition will be a priority over other events.

I’ve actually heard your uncle talk about that event. It really was a big deal in this area. You can’t count on making money anytime soon on this place—in terms of profit. But if you could get that competition going again, it should generate interest and get you more bookings.

Mmm, this doughnut is delicious. Thank you again. Mr. Dane, I had the same idea about generating bookings, but seeing the outside of the theater makes me nervous about the inside.

I can’t say I blame you there, Kevin. But you did sign the proper paperwork when last at my office, and I do have the key with me, so shall we?

Kevin crossed his fingers and held them high, making their hidden onlooker chuckle.

Should we be concerned that there are no boards over the front door? Kevin said.

No, I arranged for that with your Mr. Henry."

Which explains why he was in the area.

Precisely.

Kevin followed Mr. Dane to the grand, wide entry, then rushed back to his car to get his laptop. He clicked his car shut, then returned to the lawyer.

Let me guess, Mr. Dane said. Your current story is in the laptop.

Current and older stories, Kevin said.

Mr. Dane showed him how to open the door, then handed him the key.

Oops, Kevin said. I forgot to bring a flashlight.

No need, Mr. Dane said. The electricity is on. I’m guessing your co-owner handled it.

Co-owner? I thought they owned only the dressing room, and would that entitle them to be able to put on the electricity?

Yes on both counts. I believe the dressing room owner is actually the surprise help your uncle mentioned.

Do we know that for a fact?

No. But you will need help here, we know that much.

They walked into the lobby, and Kevin gasped loudly.

Good God, Kevin said.

The most noticeable thing in the room was the hole in the ceiling located above the center of the entry hall. The blue sky outside was visible through it, which explained why the dark rug was wet and mushy underfoot.

Aren’t you glad we wore slip-on shoes rather than sandals? Mr. Dane said as he walked toward a light switch and put it on.

Overhead lights went on, then flickered and half went off again.

I can’t believe that chandelier is working at all, Kevin said.

Both men looked upward toward the immense chandelier anchoring the space.

It looks original, albeit electrified, Mr. Dane said. And gorgeous. If it’s working this well, it can probably be saved. Maybe it’s just some of the bulbs that blew out.

Or it only needs a good cleaning, Kevin said, then walked toward the grand staircase to the right. Beautiful. He stared at the carpet covering the stairs then turned to Mr. Dane. What do you think is under the carpeting?

Hard to say but probably not wood which would be good. The carpet may have kept whatever’s under it safe.

Kevin bent down and pulled back a corner of the carpet to reveal a darkish stone edged with tile.

Interesting, Kevin said.

Hmm, Mr. Dane said as he looked over Kevin’s shoulder. Looks almost Spanish in design. That would explain the stucco on the outside. He walked to the middle of the lobby and looked at the walls. They’ve been painted over, unfortunately. Hopefully the interior of the theater proper is in better shape.

Wow, Kevin said. The enormity of the job is really starting to hit me. Mr. Dane, thank you for all your help. Go ahead and catch up with your wife, I think I need to take my time and go through this space more slowly.

Alright. Good luck with everything, and let me know how things go.

I will, Kevin said, then he and Mr. Dane shook hands.

The minute Mr. Dane left, Kevin looked around more closely at things. It was a