Deep Waters Within

By Sandra Lott

A son leaves his father behind in a quest for freedom—but will he come to regret his decision?
 
Deep Waters Within follows Jim as he leaves home, determined to pave his own path. He hits the road running. Jim is running from his father, he is running to independence, but mostly he is running from God. He is so confident he can do things on his own that he doesn’t take the time to call home. If he had, he would know that things are no longer the same as when he left with his father becoming ill. Although Jim finds a woman he believes could be the love of his life on his adventure, he keeps feeling that something is missing. Will Jim be able to dig deep within himself and find his way back home before it's too late?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Open Road Integrated Media
• Release date: Aug 29, 2018
• ISBN: 9781639843336

Sandra Lott

If there was ever a person who had love, concern, and compassion for others, it is Sandra Peterson Lott. Sandra is a Christian woman of integrity and great morals. With the Grace of God, she has triumphed over many obstacles in her lifetime. Even though the odds were against her, God has blessed her to excel above and beyond the expectations of many people. Sandra was taught at a very young age that if you wanted to be successful in life, you would have to earn it through hard work. Sandra is a Master's prepared registered nurse and is employed at a children's hospital. She sees her patients in the children's clinic of this facility. Her work does not end when she leaves her job; it only begins as she assists people with health-related issues in the community and surrounding areas. Sandra is called on by many people and she immediately responds to the call. Her favorite quote is, "It's not about me, it's about Jesus." She demonstrates this truth as she cares for others. I thank God for giving me the opportunity to have met Sandra and to get to know her as a friend, confidant, and above all, a Sister in Christ. We have shared so many life-changing conversations that I will never forget. Sandra is married to Mr. Edward Lott. She is also a loving mother of two beautiful daughters, Kary, a student at Hinds Community College, and Mercedes, a senior at Mendenhall High School. Sister Dorothy Milton (First Lady) Rose Hill M.B. Church Mendenhall, MS

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Preface

Deep Waters Within is a story about something we all face at one time or another when the Holy Spirit begins to convict us regarding the condition of our heart and where we will spend eternity.   Fighting the battle of the flesh and the conviction of the Holy Spirit is not always easy, especially when your flesh wants to win.

Jim Staley had to deal with this same problem.  His father, John, was strong in his faith and devoted to witnessing.  On the other hand, Jim did not know where he stood regarding his own faith. The battle grew and grew within his heart, until one day it was just too much.  Jim thought running from the spiritual battle going on within his heart was the answer.  Running from the problem is never the answer; he should have taken his questions and his doubts to God.  Since God created our hearts, he knows our hearts and His understanding goes beyond our comprehension.  Great is our Lord and mighty in power; His understanding has no limit. (Psalm 147:5)

The problem was not in the location, but in his heart, and since you take you with you everywhere you go, his rebellion would catch up to him and he would eventually have to come to terms with the questions concerning his faith. 

God gave us free will in order to allow us to seek Him with a sincere heart.  Let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. (Hebrews 10:22) When we run from our problems and give into the dictates of the flesh, we will reap the consequences of it.  Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. (Galatians 6:7-8) Giving into the dictates of the flesh also opens the door to the enemy and he will not stop at a piece, he wants it all.  Do not give the devil a foothold. (Ephesians 4:27) Satan wants to destroy you and your testimony. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full. (John 10:10)

Jonah, from the Bible, did the very same thing, and the shipmates on the boat with him, as he traveled in the opposite direction from where God told him to go, were hurt by his disobedience.  God had mercy on Jonah’s fellow shipmates; He sent a great wind and caused them to know that it was because of Jonah.  This was mercy on God’s part for the process of Jonah coming to terms with his sin to begin.  He was swallowed up by a whale and allowing this too, was the mercy of God.  Now the Lord provided a huge fish to swallow Jonah, and Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights. (Jonah 1:17) God will allow your sin to swallow you up in order to get your attention. God does all these things to a person—twice, even three times—to turn them back from the pit that the light of life may shine on them. (Job 33:29-30)

The effect of Jonah’s sin on his shipmates is true of all of us when we are in disobedience to the Lord, we may not even realize the effect that it has on those around us until they are hurt by it and our relationship with them suffers as a result.

Just like Jonah, God, out of His overwhelming love for us will not allow us to stay in rebellion and disobedience, due to the effect it will have on us both in this life and the next.  As any good father, He must punish us.  My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when He rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines the ones He loves, and He chastens everyone He accepts as His son.Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his child. For what children are not disciplined by their father? If you are not disciplined—and everyone undergoes discipline—then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of spirits and live! They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in His holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." (Hebrews 12:5-11)

Jim would suffer from his rebellion and would pay a high price for it.  As with all of us who disobey the Lord, who run from Him, Jim would suffer consequences of his disobedience. 

Your own conduct and actions have brought this on you. This is your punishment. How bitter it is! How it pierces to the heart! (Jeremiah 4:18)

We can continue to run and after much pain, end up at the point of crying out to God in prayer.  Crying out to God to give us the answers to the questions within our heart regarding our faith that we wanted all along, or we can take the short route and ask first!  He is a big and loving God!  He can take your emotional frustrations, especially if it leads to drawing you closer to Him.

On the Run

Run, run away!  You keep running

from the answer, why don’t you run

to Him.  He paid the highest price to

save you from your sin.

Why do people run from You when

trouble comes their way?  Instead of

running to You, they only run away.

When you’re on the run, you stay

Confused, your heart is bruised.

All directions lead to pain and

Heartache comes your way.

The answer is so simple, you

Don’t comprehend.  Life can

Be so easy with Jesus as your friend.

He is just a prayer away.  On the

Run is how you stay.  If you could

Only change directions, love would

Come your way!

Run, run away!  You keep running

from the answer, why don’t you run

to Him.  He paid the highest price to

save you from your sin.

Satan has you blinded.  It’s so easy to

see, when you hear how Jesus paid.  He

died to set you free!

Just turn around and run His way.  Your

Heart will be fulfilled.  The heartache will

Just disappear as you do His will.

Life will have new meaning when you run

His way.  He will give you a purpose.

Why don’t you run today?

Run, run away!  You keep running

from the answer, why don’t you run

to Him.  He paid the highest price to

save you from your sin.

Run, run away.  On the run is how

You stay.  Run, run away.

Then He said to them, Follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men."

Matthew 4:19

Chapter 1:

The Rebellion

Anger consumed Jim as he sped off down the road, How can he expect me to do that just because he does?  Jim thought to himself.  Continuing his thoughts, He is the one who likes that stuff and I am not doing it anymore!

Justifying the horrible fight, he just had with his father, Jim did not know where he was going.  He just knew he had to leave and he was going to get as far away as possible. 

Jim and his father, John Staley, were very close, and were as much like friends as they were father and son. Jim’s father, John, loved his job and loved it even more because his son shared that same passion for woodwork.  They owned a cabinet shop called, Staley’s Custom Cabinets and Woodwork and they fit together so perfectly in their business. His dad was creative and had a great mind for business while Jim; just as creative was a great salesman.

They also believed in eating right and taking care of themselves, they loved to work out together and even took morning runs on the beach together.  Jim was thirty-eight years old with short dark brown and slightly wavy hair, six feet tall and slender, but strong and well-built as was his father. The one area that they had issues with was their beliefs.  John loved God with all his heart and his faith was very strong.  Jim, on the other hand was not sure at all. 

At ten years old Jim started questioning the existence of God when one of his friends at school was hit and killed by a car.  He thought, I don’t understand. How can God let this happen to someone so young?

It created doubt and that doubt grew and grew.  John loved witnessing and he felt in some way that was the calling of every Christian, maybe not the way he does it, but nonetheless he believed that it was his duty.  And Jesus came up and spoke to them, saying, ‘All authority has been given to me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. (Matthew 28:18-19)

Jim could not do it because, although he went to church with his parents, it was more out of duty than desire, and he could not ask someone else to believe in something that he wasn’t even sure himself if he believed.

Overwhelmed and in a moment of extreme frustration, Jim told his dad about his doubts and one word led to another. Anger exploded from Jim, and before he knew it his bags were packed and the money he was saving to build a house was now going to be used to move him to California which was on the other side of the United States. It was the exact opposite of Chatham, Massachusetts, his current home.

Jim did not want to face the calling on his life, and just like Jonah, he would pay the price for running.  But Jonah arose to flee to Tarshish from the presence of the Lord. He went down to Joppa, and found a ship going to Tarshish; so, he paid the fare, and went down into it, to go with them to Tarshish from the presence of the Lord. (Jonah 1:3) Just like Jonah, Jim’s pride would surely bring trouble. Pride goes before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall. (Proverbs 16:18) The Lord allowed him to follow after his own free will, but just as Jonah, his rebellion would cost him.  To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams.  For rebellion is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry.  Because you have rejected the word of the Lord, He has rejected you as king. (I Samuel 15:22-23)  Jim’s fall would come but only to bring about a resurrection in his spirit. For you have delivered my soul from death, indeed my feet from stumbling, so that I may walk before God in the light of the living. (Psalm 56:13)

The