IT COULD BE WORSE

By Genene Stradling

Solinea Moran is only thirteen years old when her mother leaves her with her stepdad, and her world falls apart. Tom drags her around with him through different towns, homes, and schools for almost four years when they finally break down in a small town in Arizona. With courage and all the determination she can find, she struggles with her life of poverty, trying to fit in, and make friends in each new place while growing up with the cold feelings of not having anyone to love her or even of belonging anywhere that continues to eat at her insides. At every new place, she keeps hoping to find something better, but it always seems to get worse, even after she graduates and goes out on her own to find peace in her life. Can she find the love and the place to belong in the small town of Holbrook? She keeps trying.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Fulton Books, Inc.
• Release date: Dec 17, 2020
• ISBN: 9781649520531

Book preview

Chapter 1

The Note

What does this mean? thirteen-year-old Solinea Moran asked as she stumbled into the kitchen, still wearing her nightgown. Tom Sherwood, her stepfather, didn’t have to look at her to know what she was talking about. With eyes cold as steel and jaws locked tight, he stared at the kitchen wall without seeing it at all.

It means—! he shouted suddenly and spun around to look at the trembling young girl and saw the fear his loud, abrupt answer had caused her. He cleared his throat and began again, only in a quieter and a much softer tone. It means—and he had to look away from her frightened eyes before he could continue—"it means your mother—he put a strong emphasis on that word—has gone off with Freddy Parson in his hot red sports car. My poor old work truck wasn’t good enough for her."

That said, he turned and went out the door, slamming it hard behind him.

Solinea stood frozen to the spot with her mother’s note still clutched in her hand. After a few seconds, she blinked and then looked at the note and read it again.

Dear Solinea,

I just can’t live like this anymore. Lord knows I’ve tried for the past seven years, but I can’t anymore. I got a chance for something better, and I’m taking it. I told Tom I was leaving you to take care of him. He has always been good to you. When I get things all straightened out, I’ll come back for you.

Love,

Mama

Freddy Parson? Who was he? A red sports car? What? Why? There were so many questions. Her bottom lip was trembling, and tears welling up in her eyes when Tom came back in the door.

Look, Solinea, he began again, I know you must be all confused, and I’m not helping much. He was clenching and unclenching his hands as he sat down in his chair. Bottom line is, your mama has gone off and left us. That’s all.

Solinea still didn’t understand, and Tom must have seen the questions in her eyes, so he shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. I don’t know what else to say.

When will she be coming back? Solinea asked as she tried to grasp what he was saying.

I dunno, Tom said, turning away. But if she does, she won’t find us here.

What…what do you mean? Solinea stammered.

I mean—Tom was talking loud again as he spun back around—I mean we won’t be here. We’ll be leaving soon.

Leaving? Solinea asked, still not able to understand what was going on. Where? Where will we go?

I dunno! Tom shrugged again, holding his palms up. Soon as I figure it out, I’ll let you know, he said with a little smirk playing at his lips. Then more seriously, he touched her shoulder. But you don’t need to worry about it. I’ll take care of you. I always have, haven’t I? Then he turned and went back out the door tossing a See ya later! over his shoulder.

True. Tom had always taken care of her since she was three years old. Her mother, Denise, had gotten pregnant when she was seventeen, and the boy had just gone off and left her. They had lived with Denise’s parents until she married Tom. So Solinea considered Tom to be her dad. He was all she knew. There was such emptiness and sadness inside that Solinea didn’t understand. No one had ever hugged her or said, I love you, but she had felt safe. But now? This note proved it. There never really was any love. She wasn’t safe.

Solinea stood looking at the closed door for a while then around at the small kitchen. It was all she could ever remember knowing. Moving? She looked at the note again. She heard Tom start up his truck and drive off as she slowly made her way back to her bedroom to get dressed.

Chapter 2

Moving!

True to his word, just one week later, when Solinea got home from school, there were several big boxes with her stuff packed inside and a big battered suitcase sitting by the front door. Tom stood off to the side, just watching her. Without saying a word, she looked up into his eyes. She knew what this meant.

Well, you ready? he said, forcing a smile into his voice.

Where are we going? Solinea asked. They hadn’t really talked much since the day of the note, and she had no idea of his plans.

Little Rock, Arkansas! he stated very firmly.

Little Rock, Arkansas? Solinea asked, knitting her eyebrows together and scrunching up her nose.

You a parrot or something? Tom joked. I got everything we need all packed up right here. Ready to start off at first light in the morning.

B-b-but my friends? Solinea stammered. I didn’t say goodbye. No one knows I’m leaving.

You’ll make some new ones, Tom said, shrugging it off. Not like you had many here, anyways.

Mary Nell and Gloria Jean! Solinea retorted.

Yeah, well, you’ll have tons in Little Rock, he said and patted her on the head.

And what about our house? Solinea asked. What’s going to happen to it?

I don’t know, and I don’t care. Tom was brusque again. The bank will take it back and sell it, I guess. They can burn it down for all I care.

He turned and walked away. That was the end of all conversation for the night. Solinea knew that when he walked off, he was done talking.

Solinea had a hard time going to sleep that night so she must have slept in late the next morning because she awoke to Tom shaking her shoulder.

Wake up, sleepyhead! he called to her. Time to get rollin’.

It took a few seconds for Solinea to remember today was the day they were leaving their home for good.

Hurry up! Tom said, pulling back her