Hope and Courage

By Lisa (Cox) Kibler

It's a subject nobody wants to talk about until it attacks them! Unless you have been through it yourself, you cannot relate or fully understand what that person is going through. It's time to bring this topic out into the open and "talk" about it and realize that no one can get through it without support, family, friends, and faith.

My journey started in 2013 with my first surgery to remove lymph nodes. The results were "inconclusive." Five years went by before my lymph nodes would again decide to "freak out" and require another surgery. This time we got answers…

The smell of spring was in the air, and the day was sunny and warm. I was trying to finish up the current school year with my kiddos when everything changed. My husband and I had big plans for the summer. We were looking forward to kayaking, camping, fishing; and I was looking forward to playing softball. Then came the doctor's appointment, and when the doctor said cancer, everything came to a screeching halt in more ways than one.

Cancer is devastating, but I chose to put on my armor and fight this beast head-on. I did not realize just how difficult this "battle" was going to be and how much I would be tested physically, spiritually, and mentally. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to face; but with God, family, and friends, I was able to defeat the beast "for now."

Was it easy? No! Do I want to go through it again? No! But after talking with many cancer survivors, I learned that anything is possible through prayer and perseverance. I hope that sharing my story may help someone else get through their journey with hope and courage.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: May 7, 2021
• ISBN: 9781098078287

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Hope and Courage

Lisa (Cox) Kibler

Copyright © 2021 by Lisa (Cox) Kibler

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.

832 Park Avenue

Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

Faith

Hearing the Words You Have Cancer

In memory of Randy Macgregor (my radiation buddy) and Bette Sue Thistle (my friend) and countless others who fought like warriors against this beast called cancer.

Iam writing about my journey in hopes that my story may inspire or comfort at least one person who may be struggling with this horrible beast called cancer.

To all who have been diagnosed, supported a loved one, fought the fight—win or lose—and all the survivors who still live with this every single day of their lives.

This is my story…

This journey is not an easy one to share as anyone who has ever been told they have cancer knows. But I felt it necessary to share my story and make this beast called cancer not so hush, hush and let people know that this is a difficult challenge to overcome, but one that can be overcome with faith, strength, and support. But most of all, hope and courage …

This is my journey as I share the human factor of it all (the emotions) and the struggles that go along with this beast called cancer. The road was not smooth nor was it easy; it had many bumps along the way…but with determination and sheer willpower, this warrior fought and came out victorious with an army of people standing beside, around, and behind her every step of the way. Little did I know just how long and difficult this journey would be.

My husband, my children, my parents, my in-laws, my friends—these wonderful people who held me up when I felt weak and hours of conversations to help get me through all this. Without all these people in my life, this journey would have been much more difficult. And I will need them again, and for that, I am grateful they are in my life.

But my one true guide was the Lord, my God, who carried me when I was too broken to carry myself. He held me up and pushed me to keep going through the worst of times. He had/has a plan for me, and even though I may not understand it fully, I will rely on Him for strength, guidance, and faith through it all.

My journey is far from over as I will have this beast for the rest of my life…but I choose to fight each and every time it rears its ugly head and I will be victorious until God sees it fit to bring me home and grace me with my wings. It is inevitable…but it is how we choose to live our life until that day that matters.

My journey started on April 14, 2018. Well, actually it officially started on March 23, 2013, with my first surgery to remove swollen lymph nodes from under my left armpit. This was a scary and very painful experience, but one that I have learned so much from. The results from that biopsy were inconclusive, which was later explained by my oncologist. No definite answers as to why my lymph nodes decided to freak out. So we thought we were in the clear…for now.

Then, on April 14, 2018, I woke up with a swollen armpit again on the left side. This time, it was very painful, hot to the touch, and I could not put my arm down. Of course, this happened to hit on a day that we got our last spring snowstorm, so I was unable to go anywhere that day. It was a Saturday, so I waited until Monday to go in to see the doctor. I tried calling the hospital to get in to see my surgeon that had done my first surgery five years prior, but they were completely booked until June! So I went to my local clinic, and when I saw the nurse practitioner, she took one look at my armpit and said, You stay right here, and before I knew it, she was out of the room and I was…waiting. Throughout this journey, waiting became the hardest part of all of it. She returned to ask me who my surgeon was in 2013. I told her and she disappeared again. There I sat, for what seemed like an eternity, and when she returned just a few minutes later, she had talked to my surgeon and I was to go see him the next day. Funny how she could get me in to see him the next day, but when I called earlier that morning, I could not get in for at least a month. But regardless, I was going to see him the next day, which was a relief since I was in so much pain. Already my mind started going to places that were not helpful as I had already gone through this once before and kept thinking, How many times will this happen before they figure out what is going on? Well…we didn’t have to wonder too much longer…

I went to see my surgeon the very next day, and he told me I will be having surgery the next morning! Needless to say, I was not prepared for any of this, let alone surgery that would forever change my life. I went home and prepared for the same surgery I had five years ago with the words of my surgeon stuck in my head: We will figure this out this time, if I have to drive to the university myself and oversee the tests. We have to know what we are dealing with this time. I was not sure at this point if that was comforting or scarier than I wanted it to be. To be totally honest, I was still in shock from this happening so quickly for the second time, but I was relieved that he was not going to let this by again without some definite answers. My surgeon, I found out later, already had a pretty good idea what was going on but did not want to make things worse with his thoughts before the surgery and tests were concluded.

I was actually scheduled to leave for a conference the next day for work, so I had to let work know what was going on and that I would not be able to attend the conference that I had waited thirteen years to participate in, which was heartbreaking…but I needed to do what had to be done to figure all this out. My work was very understanding and reassured me that I need not worry about work right now and take care of me, which was very much appreciated. This would have been the first year I was able to attend this particular conference as all my children were now on their own, so I was