Forward to Glory: Tempering

By Brian Paul Bach

"Butterbugs is a nobody, a nothing. But that's not why he's compelled to drive to Hollywood and hurl himself upon the mercy of the cinematic capital. His only dream is to act. Without any plans, resources or friends, he throws caution to the wind and embarks on a journey to the City of Angels. The trials that result pose only one question: will Butterbugs remain a non-entity, or will his big dream come true?

Facing the movie monolith's prospects alone, Butterbugs attempts to perform dramatic scenes in front of the homeless and amongst the inebriated. Living in his car, and with dwindling reserves, he searches for opportunities, takes on a hazardous scaffolding job, and makes desperate pleas to bankers for clemency. Isolation leads to alienation, from fringe existence to bare survival, all in a city which cradles high achievement and bottomless failure. Despite his rough start, Butterbugs is strangely attractive to other outcasts turned possible allies: Heatherette – a mysterious force for good whom he weirdly rejects, and who in turn, rejects him; Starling – the thief who tries to love him; ProwlerCat – who might indeed save him, though it is far too early to know for sure. At one of his bleakest moments, Butterbugs receives his first sign of hope that his dreams remain alive: a screen test and the chance to be an extra in a major production. But now, with his first opportunity in hand, nothing seems as it should, except his going forward.

Abundant with movie lore and invention, Forward to Glory I: Tempering by Brian Paul Bach is an ode to the cinema and the bewitching power of entertainment. "

• Language: English
• Publisher: Clink Street Publishing
• Release date: Mar 21, 2014
• ISBN: 9781911525066

Brian Paul Bach

Brian Paul Bach is a writer, artist, filmmaker and photographer; he has worked across the entertainment business, in theatre, music and as an academic. He now lives in central Washington State with his wife, Sandra. 

Book preview

Preface To The First Edition

Preamble: The Welcome Mat

Welcome to the ultra-dramatic world of the cinema – the biggest, best, and most sensational side of show business!

Cinema is kinetic, like the name says. It’s always moving, rolling, grinding, flickering, pulsating, and progressing forward…

…Forward, to…

…to drama, comedy, history, tragedy, melodrama, farce, musical, foreign, classic, sci-fi, horror, biopic, epic, slapstick, blaxploitation, chop-socky, porno, sitcom, rom-com, buddy-buddy, romance, bromance, biblical, mythological, chick-flick, film noir, peepshow, fiasco, documentary, mockumentary, cinerama, satire, chamber piece, period piece, filmed play, zoetrope, imax, saga, series, masala, sequel, prequel, zoopraxiscope, remake, retread, franchise, mutoscope, silent, talkie, disaster, parody, omnibus, western, spoof, action, adventure, action/adventure, B-picture, Z-picture, psychodrama, monodrama, adaptation, rip-off, flop, bomb, blockbuster… and runaway hit. We’ve got ’em all. We’ve done it all. Picture shows, every one.

As the old saying goes, ‘Movies Are Your Best Form Of Entertainment!’

Film is the most dynamic manifestation of showbiz. A very special place. It’s where we sit, in darkness. Then, there is light. We do not go toward it. It comes to us. Where fantasy flirts with fact. Where fact takes liberties, then turns them into fantasy. Where realism duels with illusion – and both are left standing. Where the Big-Time examines the small-time, and discovers it’s Big. Where sober documentaries try to be definitive, but morph into extreme inventions. Where cartoons tell more about us than historical dramas. Where the Apollonian embraces the Dionysian, to form a terrific and commercially-successful sex comedy. Where realness struggles as it mixes with art. Where filmmakers aim high in constructing plot and developing character. Where essential elements are combined, to hopefully emerge with a meaningful (and profitable) outcome. Where all these efforts must fit inside the medium’s technical limitations.

Film is a place where all kinds of people intersect, orbit, work, and hang out. Where superstars share sack lunches with crew members who pick up cigarette butts, carnival barkers mingle with summer stock players, dainty ballerinas pirouette past hip-hop b-boys, and Shakespearean soliloquies share the airwaves with standup insult-humor.

Film is a place of extremes: cheap to costly, erudite to crude, deafening to whispering, baroque to austere. Where going ‘over-the-top’ regularly conflicts with staying safely down in the trenches.

Film covers the waterfront, from the mousehole in the basement to the other side of the universe… And everywhere in between, with everything tossed in for good measure. To see how it works. If it works. It’s all about creating artifice, followed by an editing process. Profit is the number one goal. Love is a fringe benefit.

Everything in film is heightened, hopped-up, sexed-up, built-up, sometimes distorted, often expanded for dramatic purposes – then clipped back for brevity – or because theatre owners want shorter films they can run multiple times per day, and sell more concessions. Attraction is paramount. Otherwise, why make a movie? It has to be worth doing. That’s why audiences come. In search of the remarkable, perhaps. Or the extraordinary. Not the ordinary, nor the boring. That’s the filmmakers’ and the exhibitors’ pact with the audience. At the very least, the show has to be a worthwhile time-filler. To be spent wisely, perchance with actual enjoyment, before viewers return to normal life, such as checking their smartphones, resuming control of their forklifts, finishing that roofing job, opening the day-care as usual, a late evening of binge-drinking, or assessing the next patient’s blood work.

Everybody loves the movies. Or at least a movie. Everybody’s been going to see them for so long now, no one still lives who never knew them. Well, that’s an overdone, overblown, over-the-top thing to say (and probably inaccurate, too), but when you think about it, that’s really what the movies are based on. Sensation, sensationalism, and the act of appreciating both.

The four-part saga which follows will be founded upon such principles. Plus a lot of cinema-oriented factors, as required.

The cinema is populated by a diverse group. All the cliches are true. Everything you’ve heard about or suspected. Winners, losers, lifers, one-hit wonders. Bozos and geniuses, luminaries and creeps. The conquerors sitting by the pools, and the attempters who missed the boat. The workaday grunts and the privileged producers. The persecuted writers and the pampered starlets. The brave, the bold, and the beautiful. All the usual extremes. Plenty rank-and-file, too: those who work in the biz, whereby to live. Denizens on both sides of the camera. They’re all in the mix here and will be called upon, as needed.

The cinema also has important outlying communities. Those who watch, listen, and react. Those who are fans, clamoring for more, or those who bring on the rotten tomatoes. Audiences of all types, who pay their way, and expect product – and get it – in all forms. Whether they like it or not. Most, as it turns out, like or even love the product. They keep the movies alive.

For all intents and purposes, the very power of the cinema can best be demonstrated by way of only one aspect: death. Indeed, death. Death on the screen is usually a much more concise and acute experience for the average viewer than the life experience of death itself. More convenient, too. Why so? Think of how many examples we’ve witnessed in our cinema-consuming careers! Because cinematic versions are highly manipulated and dramatically-enhanced, we’re right there in the moment. We are never as detached as we think we are. It may be ‘only a movie’, and we may rejoice when a hated villain is snuffed, but filmic power is upon us, and we remember it. Invariably, death scenes are carefully done, not to mention nicely arranged, so that the person(s) who are dying or dead appear in just the right light and focus. Or they utter the most moving or famous last words. In costume, too. Death-wise, everything has to be rigged up to serve the film and its accompanying impact. Besides, death spices up a plot. Pretty much every time. And because we all have the high privilege to die ourselves, death on the screen is always an attention-getter, something we can relate to, and its effects frequently fill the box office with gold. Pure cinematic power in action.

The ultra-dramatic world of the cinema! Such is the always-stirred kettle in which the following saga is staged. In it will be found the familiar and the foreign, the lofty and the flat, the ridiculous – and maybe even the sublime. And stuff in between. With showbiz you never quite know what’ll turn up. Expectations there are aplenty, but the directions taken are often unexpected, unruly, unknown. The audience has to be ready for anything, and up for it, too.

In short, the world of show business is so broad, it’s almost always described in extremes. And with the power and capability of film, the whole spectrum can be defined, captured, and kept for review.

That’s a big part of the invented saga to come. It takes place now, this minute, as we live and breathe. There’s no time to waste on dates, seasons and schedules. Sound and light travel at the same speed around these parts. ‘You gotta be fast and you gotta be good, otherwise the pace’ll kill ya’, as the Hollywood pros say. Indeed, the scene is mostly Hollywood itself, but, also, it’s wherever movies are shot and shown, which is everywhere.

Coming up, one person will face this cinematic world, alone at first, Then, as things get complicated, the many join in. From a keyhole view, the scope will widen, until it reaches around the globe.

Early silent films often opened with an ‘iris-in’, when a pinprick of light on a black screen expands into a coherent scene, and we’re off and running.

Our saga initially focuses on a single character, and that character’s exposure to the cinematic world. The character’s name is Butterbugs. Personally, I’ve never heard that name occurring anywhere but in my own usage. I find it to be attention-getting, singular, and perfect for its purpose. Its oddness will decrease the more it is encountered. Rather like ‘Roosevelt’ or ‘Khrushchev’. Or ‘Jayewardene’ or ‘Mobutu Sese Seko’ or… ‘Netanyahu’. Maybe ‘Butterbugs’ will achieve similar name recognition, hopefully without notoriety attached.

I suppose the gender and race of Butterbugs’ character actually do matter somewhat, but ‘Forward To Glory’ is one American story of the Twenty-First Century where those issues aren’t really front and center.

What issues are?

While the present Preface offers a few instructional points (optimistically presented in a ‘101’ manner, no insult intended), I must leave off before more analysis is broached. Besides, we’ve got a show to do.

If it would help, I could launch one of those ‘Ten Minutes Till Showtime’ countdowns so beloved in drive-in movie culture, but I guess there just isn’t time…

Suffice it to say, a showbiz story, particularly of the cinematic variety, is probably going to involve issues of success, failure, fame, infamy, money-gain, money-loss, media distortion, childish behavior, substance abuse, cynicism, high times, low times, adventures in filming, misadventures in filming, drinking, smoking, quitting drinking, quitting smoking, drugs, dangers and annoyances, pleasures and perks, high talk, low talk, innocence exploited, greed, worry, confidence, budgets, over-budgets, conflicting personalities, harmonious collaboration, tantrums, death, explosions, innovations, illness, mental illness, semi-boring technical details, exhibitionism, disappointment, kinkiness, expectations, stress, performance anxiety, power plays, corrupt players, big hatred, big love, big people, little people, plausibility, implausibility, small talk, table talk, idle chatter, wasteful endeavors, noble sacrifices, true goodness, decency, gentlemanly conduct, gentlemen’s agreements, isolation, alienation, politics (‘showbiz for ugly people’) – and sex.

Plus, as Yul Brynner was wont to say, perhaps a few too many times, in ‘The King and I’ (20th-Fox, 1956), ‘Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera…’, a perfectly handy phrase for exploitation as a sort of dumpster for containing bloated laundry lists and out-of-control itemization.

‘Well,’ as Ronald Reagan (the Warner Bros. contract player) always said, ‘there he goes again’ – with the extremes.

Thing is, that’s really what most of showbiz is about: one extreme to another. Obviously, there’s always plenty of filler in between, but because sensation is the name of the game in such territory, that’s where the emphasis lies.

Maybe I just answered the ‘issues’ question. Maybe not…

In any case, audiences usually want answers all the way through their entertainment experiences, but it’s also important to note how many are laced with ambiguity, non-resolve, and a lack of nice clean closures. In fact, many a customer balks when a tale is wrapped up with a big bright conclusive ribbon. Happy endings are for little kids. Paradoxical, ironic, funky, and plot-twisted-all-to-hell endings are fashionable and cool. Explosions are simplistic, but inarguable.

It seems that even though uncertainty doesn’t fit in with the modern person’s idea of what life should be like, audiences have come to accept ambiguity in their movies and series. And indeed, they expect it in many instances. That’s what sequels and franchises depend on. Doors are left open – open for business. The more plots and profits, the better.

So, see what you think about these talking points. Please remain in your seat, stay tuned, don’t touch that dial, don’t hit fast-forward. Kindly refrain from pressing the adjacent remote control button, or clicking on another website, or wiping to a further app, or tapping the next text.

Not yet awhile.

In short, try sticking this thing out. There are rewards along the way.

All through ‘Forward To Glory’ various cinematic techniques shall come into play. Audiences are thoroughly familiar with them, whether consciously or subliminally. They wholly rely on such tools for storytelling convenience. Close-ups, medium close-ups, dissolves, dollying, trolleying, fades in & out, establishing shots, long shots, boom shots, crane shots, flyovers, zooms, points of view, scoring, scripted dialogue, and montages will be beneficially employed. Invention, mutation, and experimentation have their place, too.

It’s true that the public’s response to ‘experimental’ films has always been mixed, but if the world at large isn’t to be considered as one big experiment, I don’t know what is. Audiences should probably keep this notion in mind more often than they do, but I can hardly blame them. They want movies that make sense and entertain. ‘Forward To Glory’ aims to do just that – with a few surprises thrown in.

In order to engage and intrigue audiences, makers of motion pictures are often obliged to employ gimmicks of all kinds. To hold their attention, if nothing else. Cecil B. DeMille was always terrified of boring his viewers, and he was pretty typical. Not that every frame that’s shot has to have an exclamation point, so to speak. But skillful cinematic punctuation makes for a rhythm that will appeal to viewers. With my own efforts, I’m totally with C.B. in this matter.

With gimmicks acknowledged, maybe I should define them further. Here are a few noteworthy items not to be found in each of the ‘Notes’ sections that appear before each of ‘Forward To Glory"s volumes. (Or ‘Acts’ as I call them; you know me by now – always trying to ‘cinematize’ everything…)

Some gimmicks – or things – to keep in mind:

– Word inventions, location inventions, film inventions, studio inventions, personage inventions, everything-else inventions: all are major factors in this saga.

– Such manufactures are intended for the Reader’s amusement first, and for the advancement of story and plot second.

– Nearly all the 1001 films in the Filmography at the end of Volume (or Act) IV are solely the Author’s creations. Look for them only here, and not in any reputable or coherent reference work. The same goes for many persons and films intermixed with the progression of the saga to come. Many real people and true-to-life references do occur though, and I leave them for students of film to winnow out, if they care enough.

– There is a somewhat casual Glossary in the concluding volume also, along with a lengthy sort of ‘explanatory’ farewell sendoff titled ‘Notes On Sources: A Concluding Essay’, which outlines the Author’s approaches in the production of this saga.

– In the text, italics are most often employed for purposes of emphasis. This is the movie world, folks. People are dramatic.

– Motion picture technology, studio systems, and how the film world works in ‘Forward To Glory’ cannot be called ‘cutting-edge’ in any way. In fact, aside from several obvious forays into Author-invented movie gimmicks and formats, the saga’s film scene is very 1959 – if not 1939. I know, conditions were hardly perfect back then, but within a period context, a consistency was in play that I find most appealing. Things were certainly complicated enough, yet more straightforward than today. Most of the public can’t keep up with every little tech advance, and I can’t either. So I’ve chucked the you-are-there authenticity of trying to capture the perfect LA as a credible backdrop for my story. That way, we don’t have to worry about the side of things that includes the latest ‘kicks’, and whether to brand something as stupid or quaint just because it was cutting-edge at one time, and is now laughably out of date. Besides, constructing your own private Hollywood is a totally Hollywoodian act. From Culver City to Calcutta, it’s one big studio, one big back lot, one big location. And the same goes for further afield, in every direction. Let’s really open this thing up and stay loose. However, I don’t want to ‘date’ my Hollywood in any way, either. Not to worry. It’s right now, and it’s happenin’. That’s all that matters.

There is scarcely a minute in its rather eventful evolution when cinema hasn’t been faced with some hair-burning threat or shakeup or revolution. That’s only one reason why the movies are so damn exciting. The medium itself isn’t the only element that’s turbo-dynamic. The entire milieu swirls, churns, and thrives on a shakti-like restlessness and change. Since the beginning of things, movers and shakers have abounded. They’ve even taken turns. 1919: The Artists become United. 1927: Warners rattles the silents with sound. 1929: William Fox tries to monopolize the studios (and fails). 1930s: Mayer and Thalberg create a monolith. 1939: Selznick invents the blockbuster. 1941: Welles raises Kane. 1953: Zanuck and Skouras cause an earthquake with CinemaScope. 1950s–60s: Lew Wasserman crafts the first true entertainment conglomerate, and who knows what Zuckerberg will pull off. (Hell, Facebook/SugarMountain Intergalactic International Pictures will probably be launched on every single one of your devices by tomorrow morning, if not late tonight…)

Cinema’s progression has been overwhelmingly linear and explainable all along. There’s hardly any mystery attached. It’s riddled with cause-and-effect, to an absolutely banal extent: peepshows > silents > world war > more silents > sound > bankruptcy > monopoly threat > Great Depression > world war again > blacklisting > TV > widescreen > corporate takeovers > TV > dying studio heads > TV > dying studio systems > TV > rebel filmmakers > the curse of the blockbuster > cable > VHS > satellite > computers > DVD > laptops > Blu-Ray > smartphones > tablets > digital-this > digital-that > video game rivalry > Internet streaming > digital theatres > celluloid-is-dead-but-long-live-the-movies > watches > microscopic media > the Cloud > Mars > – whatever…

But ‘Forward To Glory’ is set in my Hollywood, my cinematic world. Much of the infrastructure is frozen in time, but a whole lotta shakin’ awaits.

Let’s go.

Artistic licenses aside, it is the story which is foremost. Thus the well-worn ‘saga’ label. Critics often frown upon storytelling that is ‘episodic’, with the implication that no overriding theme exists, or that it drifts away. Yet they fawn over miniseries – or maxi-series – that are nothing but episodes, and run on and on, with a seductive hook at the end of each one.

Thus, if more labels need to be slapped onto ‘Forward To Glory’, the ‘episodic’ epithet is hereby accepted with relish. ‘Miniseries’ or ‘continuing series’ may be true too, especially in the contexts of television or online streaming. But I prefer to stick to the movie concept, mainly for its ‘event’ status, traditional classiness, and big-screen prestige. These latter qualities may or may not be achieved, but they are certainly admired and respected around the back lots I happen to inhabit.

Those are the dimensions that circumscribe the following episodic story.

As this is the first stop before we can proceed forward – hopefully, to glory – a wee bit more prefacing awaits, prior to the official opening of the floodgates, so to speak.

For those keen on proceeding onward now, the following segment of this Preface may be cheerfully skipped without a care. But Readers may find its discussion quite helpful in securing a rudder by which to navigate the currents, shoals, atolls, islets, storms – and smooth sailings – dead ahead.

To those going on to the show, have fun. Big fun if possible, because that’s what this assertively-fictional plowing-forth is all about.

As Jonny, our upcoming host likes to say: ‘I will guide you. It’s a long show ahead, but unlike anything you’ve ever witnessed! No hokum, no ballyhoo here! It’s going to be a great show! You’ll see. You’ll thank me in the end! Trust me!’

In the midst of the glorious chaos to come, remember, the play’s the thing. As the (doomed!) superstar called Silk, played by Vidya Balan in ‘The Dirty Picture’ (Balaji Pictures, 2011), declares: ‘Filmein sirf teen cheezon ki wajah se chalti hain… entertainment, entertainment, entertainment… Aur main entertainment hoon.’

Translation from the Hindi: ‘Films are moving because of just three things… entertainment, entertainment, entertainment… and I’m Entertainment!’

To those choosing to remain at the threshold a few minutes more, come – right this way…

A Sitcom Preview

We’ll be right back to ‘Forward To Glory’ in a moment. After this word from the Mulgeon Group of Studios and Networks:

The following PREVIEW is approved for

ALL AUDIENCES

EVERYWHERE

ALL THE TIME

(Fade in to aerial shots of Los Angeles. Glamorous ‘flyover’ music plays. Palms, swimming pools and other LA cliches are seen below. Shots quickly boil down to a posh beachfront house in Malibu. Aerial shot from helicopter approaches rapidly, as if about to crash into house. Cut to:

Interior of Malibu house. Mid-Century Moderne decor. Two persons present, PRODUCER, in ‘corporate’ attire, and  WRITER, in ‘writer’ garb. Camera dollies into medium closeup of PRODUCER. Music fades.)

PRODUCER: Sir, your book is a goodly book. But the subject – the subject! There is no room for it. A good book on a ‘used’ subject will never do. Your track is too beaten, Sir.

(Cut to matching medium closeup of WRITER.)

WRITER: I deny your premises altogether. I deny the goodness of the book, and the badness of the subject. I deny the major of your syllogism, as I deny the validity of your minor. And I deny the authority of your implied conclusion, though I may still make you a present of it.

(Camera quickly dollies out to include PRODUCER in general shot with WRITER. The Pacific Ocean, seen through the window in the background, forms a gulf between them. Brief ‘confused’ arpeggio plays.)

PRODUCER: What the hell are you talking about?

WRITER: In heaven’s name, how many years is it since we were sick of that same cuckoo note? What track is not beaten? When were writing’s roads not rutted according to you ravens, who can make obsequious room for those who can find room without them, but never can discover space in the arena for yet untried competitors?

PRODUCER: (annoyed and grimacing) Huh?? What??

WRITER: (steadily) Why, every branch of literature is  overcrowded! All present times are bad times! All unproved issues are ill-boding!

(Cut to closeup of PRODUCER.)

PRODUCER: What the fuck have you been smoking, Bub? Huh? Huh? Huh?

(Cut to medium closeup of WRITER, who gestures grandly to the Pacific.)

WRITER: (nobly) A traveler must be early on his march, with a vengeance, in any country the sun shines on, to find his track unbeaten, according to the sing-song of the gentry, with whom a theme is bound to be like their galligaskens of the last fangled mode. And, ‘the newer the better’ is the tailoring maxim for both! (Finishes with a flourish.)

(Cut to same general shot of PRODUCER and WRITER facing each other.)

PRODUCER: (exasperated) I come to you with a simple pitch for a Fall sitcom pilot, and what do I get? What?? A guy who’s – who’s channeling ‘Notes On Naples And Its Environs’ by A Traveller! 1838! Right? Am I right??

(Cut to closeup of WRITER, beaming.)

WRITER: You like it?

(Cut to closeup of PRODUCER, deadpan.)

PRODUCER: (looks out at the Pacific, as if that’s where an audience is) Is he kiddin’? (Then, to WRITER, overjoyed) I love it, baby! I love it! I especially love that – that little – you know – ‘galligaskins’ bit! (Whatever the hell that is…)

(Cut to closeup of WRITER, smiling confidently.)

WRITER: Oh, yeah.

(Cut to closeup of PRODUCER.)

PRODUCER: Can we use it in the Ellen Special, you think?

(Cut to closer closeup of WRITER. Whimsical music sketches.)

WRITER: You’re catchin’ on.

(Cut to closer closeup of PRODUCER.)

PRODUCER: Beautiful, man. Terrific! Now, uh, what was that you were, uh, smokin’, hmm? Thanks for sharing. OK?

(Cut to black. ‘Wacky’ music plays, featuring a comedy trombone.)

(Cut to title, white letters on black; duration three seconds:)

THAT SAME CUCKOO NOTE

(Cut to Main Credits Listing for ‘That Same Cuckoo Note’; duration two seconds.)

(Cut to title, white letters on black; duration, four seconds:)

THIS CHRISTMAS

(Cut to black. Music climaxes. End.)

Now we return to ‘Forward To Glory’, without any further commercial interruption.

The Show That Awaits

‘Forward To Glory’ is a movie.

Or – let me rephrase that.

Let’s pretend it’s a movie. That way, we can format the story by boosting the drama. Blow it up, inflate it, and in all the right places. Just like actual movies do. Because anything we see on a screen is going to be larger than life in some way, no matter what its size happens to be. Cinerama or two-way wrist TV, it doesn’t matter in the least.

As one hand washes the other, one medium can aid, abet, and enhance any related medium in order to tell a story. Book/film and film/book interrelationships go way back. A novel gets its filmization, a film becomes novelized. Audiences are experts in adapting to any medium’s conventions, even as one blends into another.

There are many movie fans who want to know all about a film before they actually see it. In the past, one had to rely on very few sources, like standard publicity, a review or two, maybe a talk show, and word of mouth. Today, word of mouth certainly persists, but with online resources, one can almost accomplish a film’s full effect without even watching it. This can be advantageous in cases of bona fide flops, disappointments in taste, or trashing by others who’ve seen it so you don’t have to.

Then there are those like me, who like to go in cold – or with minimal influence. If the film seems promising. Kind of a crap-shoot mentality, but the dedicated cineaste can easily get a feel for making such a technique work to their advantage. The average consumer would say this is foolish, especially with so much product on hand, and so few stars of ‘vehicle’ standing (e.g. when films are designed around bankable stars). Classic films and personalities are always reliable, but the avalanche of new releases requires a knack for research and a willingness to dig. That is, if one wants to retrieve gems from an ocean of rubbish. As I write, the seas are ever-expanding, and some of the new ideas and new developments actually sound pretty cool. Yet, one can still stick with several names you know, if said names are what you fancy. With each Woody Allen film, I go in cold – ice cold. Invariably, I come out with cockles nice and warm. But Woody’s just one example. Same goes for most films Liz Taylor was in, or Samm-Art Williams, or any creation from the Coen Brothers. Or any film scored by Alfred Newman. Things expand exponentially from there. Everyone has their own favorites. Such is the zest of cinematic discovery.

‘Forward To Glory’ is a four-part drama-saga designed and produced for your entertainment. It begins now.

Before we roll the film, though, a few matters of business to get out of the way.

First off, I humbly beg the Reader’s indulgence in forgiving the unforgivable. More specifically, I ask for a certain acceptance to be considered. The reasons why should be apparent before this Preface closes. Just in time for the show to begin – and that’s a promise. After the curtains part, it’s too late. So we haven’t much time.

    Here goes.

Multi-dimensional acceptance, on any number of levels, is one of the finer aspects of Hindu, Buddhist and Zen belief systems. I can’t invoke any such particulars on the subject here, so I must resort to a far shallower and self-interested spin on them.

Thus, I formally invite you, Dear Reader, to accept the blimpish, multi-part package of text before you now – the ‘Forward To Glory’ quartet – for what it is.

To accept it, as it is.

To accept (not approbate) the existence of its birth defects and inherent faults. Its boils and wrinkles, misfires and blow-outs, ballyhoo and balderdash, improbabilities and impracticalities, unbelievableness and implausibleness… Plus, its bits of sincerity, and heartfelt emotion.

And hopefully, to accept with a cheer more buoyant than heavy.

It’s not a matter of ‘buying it’, or being sold a bill of goods. Nothing nearly so profound.

After all, the present work is an Author-conceived-composed-designed-maintained and edited production, from start to finish. Therefore, its renegade flaws cannot be denied. Neither will they be self-consciously identified, time after time.

Truly then, what I’m suggesting is an ordinary, everyday ‘go with the flow’ approach to the parade of compelling episodes that follow.

Because most consumers of entertainments are now critics, all stops are out in the merciless, anything-goes landscape of writage and readage. Heaven knows where it’ll all end up… That being the case, critics are just as eligible for criticism as the criticized. (Creators and their creations being the entities most criticized, that is.)

In a rather elementary way, I equate the ‘Forward To Glory’ quartet with the world that surrounds it: the cinema itself.

As Don Knotts said repeatedly in ‘The Ghost and Mr. Chicken’ (Universal, 1966), ‘Let me clarify that.’

No less a chronicle of show business than ‘Variety’ itself has always maintained the title of ‘Legitimate’ to categorize the living theatrical stage as the premiere holder of status in the dramatic arts. This, as opposed to the upstartedness of that latter day ‘techie’ arrival, the cinema, which, in theatrical eyes anyway, can never hope to divest itself of il-legitimacy.

Past the constrictions of the theatre’s stage though, there exist vast tracts of amorphous territory, where drama is free to formulate and materialize, and where the unknown becomes known only by chance, and not as a rule.

So I dwell in this undocumented, alien, and misbegotten land, where those of us who shall never be able to ‘stack up’ against non-spurious institutions nevertheless plant our words in the blighted soil, ply our wares in ramshackle bazaars, and raise our glasses in dim, gothic saloons.

And when I say cinema, whether with a capital ‘C’ or not, I include television, cable, satellite, online streaming, dreaming, dabbling, design, scripting, scoring, photographing, smartphoning, scene-stealing, (even selfies…), and related media. Anything that moves, really. It’s all capturement, and all capturement will, sooner or later, involve Drama.

Showbiz is all about things happening. Cinema’s all about the capturing of it.

Mainly though, it’s classic, fit and proper, go-to-the-movies cinema we’re dealing with here today.

As an aside, one designation that cinema managed to extract from this cultural divide turned out to be entirely advantageous. From the phrase ‘motion picture’ came ‘picture,’ the consummate term mostly employed by professionals, but successfully transferred to the general public. Thus, it’s always been ‘Best Picture’, not Best Cinema, Film, Motion Picture, Movie, or the ghastly ‘Flick’. Stage-bound elitists? You can have your little ‘legitimate’ moniker…!

Long story short, if the cinema is a sort of artistic rebel within the world of Drama, then ‘Forward To Glory’ intends to tag along with it, if only to partake of the vastness, the wildness, the peaks and valleys, and the virtually infinite range and coverage the cinema can tackle in its presentational realities. To me it seems that film is always departing for somewhere interesting. It can be hit-and-miss, but come on, as I’ve been saying, let’s go! We will hop on wherever we can get a ride, and see where we go, and how far. The potentials are mighty intriguing, but we must hold on tight – and keep holding. If things get a little wacky, we can’t give up the ship. We must never lose our faith in ‘clinging to the wreckage’, as John Mortimer would say.

To clarify an approach to ‘Forward To Glory’ a little more, I would dare to compare the scientific art of Cinema to the science of Geography. In its contemporary holistic guise, Geography can readily entail most every science and art, by their very location, if nothing else. After that, everything falls into place. A sense of place. The same can be said for film. In its capability, its pursuits, its ideas, film can cover all of Creation, including Geography. Therefore, cinema is the most universal of the arts. That’s why, within its generous mass somewhere, there has to be a nook upon which ‘Forward To Glory’ might perch, as if it too is a movie, with a movie’s flexibility in storytelling, and a movie’s luxury of invention.

To be sure, I cotton to the roominess found in both disciplines of film and geography. As the saying goes, ‘Without Geography, you’re nowhere’. Similarly, ‘Without Cinema, you’re…’

Well, this is awkward… How to make a clever parallel…?

‘Without Cinema, you’re bored.’ Too boring.

‘Without Cinema, you’re brain-dead.’ Too accusatory.

‘Without Cinema, you’re screwed.’ Too harsh.

OK: ‘Without Cinema, your portrayal of Drama is limited to the legitimate stage.’ How’s that? Clumsy, but fairly accurate.

While the present Preface might be construed as an Apology, it is not, in actuality, that kind of deal. Not at all. In this, our Century 21 epoch, for those in their right mind, beginnings are no place to apologize – for anything. If so, it’s usually a cheap attempt to acquit oneself of trespasses to come. Obviously, apologies are better left for endings, not to mention courts of law.

So I just might. Apologize, that is. But at the end. The very, bitter, final end. If there’s anyone left in the room. It’s a poor effort, and a poorer effect, but it’s all I have. But stick around. You’ll be the judge, naturally.

So what about getting on with the show?

In just a jiffy.

I confess, the present Preface is a bit like circling the wagons around a jittering crib that holds a monster baby. If Readers can relate to this kind of protective preparedness, whether in a Papa Bear or Mama Grizzly, Snaggletooth Tiger Mom or T. Rex Dad context, perhaps the four-part saga that follows can be considered in a more sympathetic light than first impressions might suggest.

Or, four cribs with four babies, quadrupling the sympathy, perhaps?

I think that, in rashly attempting to head off anticipated criticism (at the pass), by pigeonholing my saga just a bit, Readers may find they can concentrate on the work’s main imperative – as entertainment, first, foremost, and last – without the distraction of facing any onerous tasks. Such as, forming some sort of critique aimed at the lined-up quartet, so as to explain the aiming of the darts, and the patience and tolerance applied to the reading, no matter how demanding. Or as a righteous j’accuse, to demonstrate the suffering that came with such patience, such tolerance, via the ‘acceptance’ so humbly requested at the get-go.

My friendly advice: don’t bother! Don’t struggle! It’s only an entertainment.

As the great Richard Strauss said, ‘I aspire to being a first-class second-rate composer.’

In the words to come, three characteristics are prevalent. After much toil and tears, storm and strife, and an awful lot of equivocation, I feel a need to declare the Cerberus-headed category in which I place my quartet. Like the saga itself, it is one of my sole creation, and I do lay it before the Public now.

Boldly then – for the sake of genre-branding – do I declare ‘Forward To Glory’ an

EPIC ~ NOIR ~ SATIRE

Epic in its scope!

Noir in its turnings!

Satire by its playfulness!

(A Goth House Presentation)

Coming To A Hand or a Hand-Held Device Near You!

Further explanation of this unholy trinity