I Became Speechless and Immobile: One Minute I Was Fine, the Next Minute I Was Powerless

By Mary Oketcho-Dicks

I Became Speechless and Immobile tells the powerful and inspiring story of Mary, a woman whose life is forever changed by a sudden stroke. A seasoned traveller with a zest for life, Mary sets off on a holiday to her ancestral home, filled with excitement and anticipation. But when she arrives, her world is turned upside down as she collapses without warning, leaving her incapacitated and fighting for survival.

Through her journey of recovery, Mary shares her struggles and triumphs as she learns to navigate the physical, emotional, and mental challenges that come with living with a stroke. With her moving account of determination and resilience, Mary’s story is a must-read for anyone affected by this devastating condition. Not just a tale of overcoming adversity, this book also serves as a reminder to act immediately if you feel detached from your surroundings and a guide for those who want to learn survival tips. Be prepared for a powerful and emotional journey as you follow Mary’s story of hope and triumph over one of life’s most difficult challenges.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Austin Macauley Publishers
• Release date: Jun 23, 2023
• ISBN: 9781035807741

Mary Oketcho-Dicks

Mary Oketcho-Dicks was born in Uganda, Africa, in 1954 and moved to the United Kingdom in 1999. She has lived there since and is now a British citizen. Mary is an enthusiastic woman who has a strong feeling of eagerness to do something. She works with passion, even when in a difficult situation. Soon, she will be publishing a book titled I Became Speechless and Immobile based on her experience with stroke, and her second book, titled I Am Going Nowhere, is a fiction based on a true story and has just been approved for publication.

Book preview

Introduction

My name is Mary Oketcho-Dicks. I was born and bred in Mulanda village, Tororo District, found in the eastern part of Uganda. I am the daughter of late peasants Peter Oluli and Maria Athieno.

In July 1999 I moved to the UK and it is where I call home now. Before that, I was a primary teacher/deputy head teacher and a politician in the current government. My life in the UK has been full of ups and downs but I found some strength and determination to turn the negatives into positives.

In February 2018, I went on a holiday to Kenya and Uganda where my family members are. I got an East African tourist visa that allows for Multiple Entry for tourists to the Republic of Kenya, Uganda and Rwanda. The rule to this visa is that someone holding it shall enter from the country that issued it and move within the two other countries without requiring another visa or paying for another visa fee within a period of 90 days.

The visa had been issued from the UK Kenya embassy, meaning my first entry was Kenya. I flew to Kenya on Wednesday, February 14, 2018 to visit one of my daughters, Noel, who is married and working there.

While still on board the plane, I couldn’t wait for the plane to land safely. I was very excited to go and see my daughter and the rest of her family. Well, it was an eight hours’ flight non-stop from London Heathrow airport to Nairobi Jomo Kenyatta international airport. I was so excited not knowing that in just over two weeks I would be down with a stroke and my holiday would be ruined.

The idea that came to my mind to write this book, deserves everyone’s gratitude. For many years when I heard that someone has written a book, I wondered how much time that person spent, let alone find what to write.

This book is about my experience with stroke, how it has changed my life and how I have managed and am still trying to cope with it. It mentioned my achievements despite the challenges I experienced with it and still do.

In fact, I have narrated my experiences as much as possible for anyone who might have gone through the same thing or who have looked after a person like me will understand. But, be warned that some of the things you will read here, you may find them troubling at times, while others may be inspiring. I often take each day as it comes and work my way round whatever impacts me.

But whatever the case, please try and read this book to the end as some of the experiences may help to stimulate you or others who may go through a similar situation.

Chapter One

It was strange arriving at Jomo Kenyatta international airport, Nairobi and yet I had flown to it before. I went through the passport control point where an official checked my passport and stamped it. Sometimes it can take a while to go through passport control but I think because I am a frequent visitor, it didn’t take me long when it was my turn to be checked. I was asked only a few questions and I was allowed to go through.

I had to go through it first before I was to head to the baggage claim to collect my luggage and recheck it if required. Customs and Border Patrol will basically do an audit of what you say you’re bringing into the country, such as anything taxable, illicit, illegal, prohibited or suspicious. Fortunately, I didn’t have any of those things listed above. I picked up a trolley and moved close to a conveyor that was depositing bags from our flight onto the carousel. It was not a long wait before my bags were deposited. I picked them up, put them on the trolley and exited the building.

Outside, there was a man holding a placard with my name on it. I hurried towards him and said, ‘Hello, you must be waiting for me.’

He looked at me and asked, ‘Are you Mrs Mary Oketcho-Dicks?’

I said, ‘Yes, I am.’

‘That’s perfect. Let me help you push the trolley.’

‘Oh, that’s very kind of you.’

He got the trolley from me and pushed it to where he had left his car. My daughter had sent him to pick me up. He opened the car and asked me to get in while he put my bags in the boot.

‘Thank you,’ I said.

Once he had put the bags in, he joined me in the car . He then started it and slowly manoeuvring his way, he joined the main road and we sped away. He informed Noel that we were on our way and now and again he updated her where we were.

When he was not talking to Noel, we chatted. He asked me about the UK and how the journey was. I narrated how I was happy to visit Noel and her family and how I couldn’t wait for the plane to touch down safely.

Noel lived in a secured area, so the driver had to show his ID and say where he was going. Before the gate was opened for us, Noel was phoned and asked if she was expecting any visitors. After a brief chat, the gate was opened and he drove through.

I think he had ever been to her place because he drove a short distance and turned left and just a few metres from the corner, he stopped the car and said, ‘We have arrived.’

Within a few minutes, I heard Noel and her house girl talking and walking towards the car. Even if it was in the dark, I was able to recognise them. I opened the car door and I went out to see them. While we hugged each other, the driver went round to the boot and got my bags out.

Immediately he drove away, leaving us to go to the flat. Noel lived on level 2 and there was no lift. Accessing the flat was via the stairs. Noel carried one bag and the house girl carried the other, while I had carry-on luggage and my handbag. By the time we reached the flat, we were all exhausted. I went straight and had a shower before I sat down in case I was to sit and become lazy. It was after that that I was served something to eat. After eating because I was tired, we chatted briefly and then we all retired to bed.

The following day after breakfast, Noel went to work, leaving me with the house girl and my granddaughter. I had a very good time with my granddaughter, playing and watching her programs on TV. But at some point, we both had a nap. We woke up at around 5 pm. By then Noel had also just returned from work. Once she had settled down, the house girl served us evening tea.

As we had the tea, Noel and I chatted to catch up. During the conversation, I told her that I intended to stay with her for a few days, then proceed to Uganda. It is where many of my other family members and friends are.

But prior to travelling to Kenya, I had a problematic right shoulder that I was coping with it with the help of painkillers. Noel wasn’t happy for me to leave yet. She was aware of my shoulder and how I had been complaining of its pain.

It had been more than year since I began experiencing it but I didn’t know what to do with it. My doctor in the UK kept prescribing painkillers each time I went to him. He had told me that problematic shoulder is quite common, making me believe that it’s something one can live with without treatment.

Noel suggested that I stay for a week or so before proceeding to Uganda. She phoned around to see if she could find me a doctor to check on my shoulder and perhaps treat it. She said, ‘Mum, I know you have seen a doctor in the UK about your shoulder but I want to see if the ones here can also look at it.’

‘Of course, I have seen a doctor, Noel,’ I said. ‘I have been given pain killers but sometimes medicine takes a long time for one to feel its effect. That’s what I think is happening.’

‘Maybe but it’s worth having another opinion. I don’t want you to go to Uganda with that pain.’

Agreeing, I said, ‘Okay.’

She was very concerned, so I decided to hang on for a week during which she was on the phone to find me a specialist doctor. She is someone who doesn’t want to see anyone in pain or suffering.

When she finally got a doctor, she was thrilled as the doctor she found asked to see me immediately. She took a day off and drove me to that doctor’s clinic. It was a private clinic, so we had to pay first before I was seen. Anyway, that doctor examined my shoulder and said I had an injured cuff rotator.

‘What is a cuff rotator?’ I asked.

The doctor replied, ‘It’s a group of muscles and tendons that surround the shoulder joint, keeping the head of the upper arm bone firmly within the shallow socket of the shoulder.’

I asked, ‘How do you think I might have injured it?’

He answered, ‘I don’t know how you might have injured yours but it can occur instantly after a traumatic event, such as after a fall, causing the rotator cuff to tear. A rotator cuff injury tends to trigger a dull ache in the shoulder that worsens at night. Such injuries are common and increase with age.’

Accepting, I said, ‘The latter somehow answers my question because I have not had a fall, except I am aged.’

We all laughed and I continued, ‘Why is it more painful at night?’

He replied, ‘Because of gravity, laying down can cause the rotator cuff to extend and pull, increasing much pain at night.’

I asked, ‘Is it treatable?’

He replied, ‘There are several ways it can be treated, though several rotator cuff tears can be treated non surgically. The treatment can be with anti-inflammatory medication, steroid injections and physical therapy.’

Because I was tired of the pain, I said, ‘Please offer me any one of them. This pain has been with me for over a year.’

He said, ‘Well, I will give you strong painkillers and refer you to a physiotherapist for treatment once your pain is under better control.’

I straightway started with the painkillers that very day and within two days, the pain subsided. Instantly, I phoned the physiotherapist, who was a lady and booked sessions. She (the physiotherapist) gently elongated and mobilised some of the tissues around my shoulder joint, helping me with some movements.

Besides physiotherapy, the physiotherapist also offered me acupuncture and specific taping practices to reduce pain and strengthen the delicate muscles around my shoulder and neck. After that she said she would put an electric pad around my shoulder.

I asked, ‘What does an electric pad do?’

She said, ‘As you have an injured cuff rotator, the electric pad helps to ease down the inflammation and speeds up the healing process. So, when the heat on the pad goes through the injured cuff rotator, it increases the blood flow to the tissue.’

Pleased, I said, ‘Oh, I see. That sounds like magic!’

Then she warned, ‘It will take about 45 minutes, but when you start feeling uncomfortable, please tell me and I will remove it.’

‘Okay,’ I said.

She continued, ‘So, the main thing to do is to deal with the shoulder pain by reducing the inflammation in the tendons or bursa.’

Without hesitation I said, ‘Go ahead, please.’

I had a few sessions and she repeated the same exercises each time I went. After four sessions, I felt I could raise my right arm much better, further higher. It was amazing to see how I was able to use my right