My Journey to the Light

By Dave Collins

My Journey to the Light is the story of Dave Collins' journey through life from childhood to old age. The story includes childhood and family experiences. Follow the impact of his education. See him start and grow a relationship with God and develop a life mission. See the beginning and growth of his family. Follow how all these things move Dave toward maturity and completeness in order to be a light for others. Life is filled with dark hard times and bright times filled with good. You will see both described in this journey. All experiences are important and teach us. I describe my experiences and how God used those experiences to impact and develop my life. We all begin life with immature minds. As we grow, we develop a more complete understanding of life. We develop perspectives which direct our choices impacting ourselves and those around us. I describe how my experiences impacted my thinking. Most people ask questions about themselves at some time. I asked myself questions like these. Why am I here? What am I good at? What is my purpose? Does my life count? Does my life matter? Am I lovable? Another leading influence and gift in life is relationships. You will see some of the leading relationships in my life and how they have made a difference. All these things together tell a story of God at work in the life of one of his children made in his image with purpose and value. My goal in writing has been to tell a part of God's story as seen through my life. At the end of each chapter, you will see questions that point you to consider your own life with the goal of helping you know more fully your own beauty and value.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Feb 14, 2024
• ISBN: 9798350945034

Dave Collins

Dave Collins is Professorial Fellow in Human Performance Science at the University of Edinburgh and Director of Grey Matters Performance Ltd.

Book preview

Prologue

This is a compilation of writings, photos, and sketches of life events and memories that are special to me and describe my journey through life. I hope you find inspiration and illumination as you read these chapters. I challenge you to ask yourself about your life and ponder about your own life experiences. Let’s begin.

Who are you? What defines you? What makes you who you are, gives you value, gives you purpose? These questions are asked in every life. I believe they are built into our very nature. But these questions lead us to another key question. Where do we find the answers we need? Without a definitive answer to that last question, people do not know where to look. We spend years experimenting, looking to family, friends, our culture, or celebrities to direct us. We read books and study theories. Ultimately, we tend to depend on our feelings and what others say about us.

I had no answer to those questions for years and began life simply surviving and learning how to live. Later, I began to wonder about myself and wanted desperately to be accepted by others. Driven to feel okay about myself, I went though many ups and downs with no idea of where to go to get the answers I was so anxious to find. As I got older, the questions became a weight holding me down until, in my twenties, I finally found what I needed to know.

Recently, I’ve been waking up early remembering my life. It feels like God has been having me focus on significant experiences in my past. The bible asks us to remember 353 times in the Old Testament. Remembering is an important tool to remind us of God and his work. I believe God has been directing me to focus on my life, its progress, how I have changed, and what brought on the change. You are about to read what God has been teaching me as he has been lighting the way through my life journey.

Chapter 1

Why Tell This Story?

On July 25, 2023, my journal records, I woke up this morning feeling God’s directive to remember who I am and how he has changed everything about my life. God has often told his people through scripture to remember his directives and his work in their lives. Remembering helps a person stay on track, keep strong, and stay connected to the lessons he has taught. God was calling me to remember who I was before knowing Jesus and how Jesus changed me since I entrusted my life to him. He changed what I believed and how I made choices. He continues to change me and is the reason I am very different from who I use to be. Having walked with him for over 50 years now and moving from knowing about God to knowing God personally, he has given me understanding and a new perspective on life. He has given me courage to make better choices even when the choices are hard.

Following a decision to focus on remembering my past, I sent a letter to a group that had been praying for me for over forty years and asked them to pray that I would be faithful in this time of remembering. A high school friend wrote back immediately and said, Dave, I don’t want to preach to you, but I sometimes read Psalm 116 to redirect my thoughts.

I love the Lord, for he heard my voice;

he heard my cry for mercy.

Because he turned his ear to me,

I will call on him as long as I live.

The cords of death entangled me,

the anguish of the grave came over me;

I was overcome by distress and sorrow.

Then I called on the name of the Lord:

Lord, save me!

The Lord is gracious and righteous;

our God is full of compassion.

The Lord protects the unwary;

when I was brought low, he saved me.

Return to your rest, my soul,

for the Lord has been good to you.

For you, Lord, have delivered me from death,

my eyes from tears,

my feet from stumbling,

that I may walk before the Lord

in the land of the living.

I trusted in the Lord when I said,

I am greatly afflicted;

in my alarm I said,

Everyone is a liar.

What shall I return to the Lord

for all his goodness to me?

I will lift up the cup of salvation

and call on the name of the Lord.

I will fulfill my vows to the Lord

in the presence of all his people.

Precious in the sight of the Lord

is the death of his faithful servants.

Truly I am your servant, Lord;

I serve you just as my mother did;

you have freed me from my chains.

I will sacrifice a thank offering to you

and call on the name of the Lord.

I will fulfill my vows to the Lord

in the presence of all his people,

in the courts of the house of the Lord—

in your midst, Jerusalem.

Praise the Lord.

Psalm 116 (NIV)

This psalm reminded me of my life and what I will be sharing with you. In the past, I have had days of anguish and thoughts of suicide. The cords of death truly were encircling me, but God gave me new courage to continue with life and think differently. He delivered me and gave my soul rest and a new beginning. He was compassionate and removed the chains that kept me trapped in self-doubt and the fear of being discovered as a loser without value. He helped me see the truth, and I became God’s child and his servant. Ever since I gave my life to Jesus, he has directed me and raised me up. I have been overwhelmed by circumstances, lost confidence in my abilities, and faced fearful situations, just as the writer of this psalm was facing. I have been able to take the next steps believing that the God of my life was walking with me. He is strong enough to get me through all obstacles and keep me going.

I am taking time now to record the lessons he gave that lifted me up. My desire is to continue strengthening my trust in God while growing in wisdom and maturity. I want to focus on his faithful promises and care for me all the days of my life. Now, as this life draws closer and closer to its end, my goal is to grow in faith and fulfill my vow to God to do what he wants me to do and be who he wants me to be all the days of my life. Life lived in this manner will gain vision, courage, meaning, value, and freedom. It is a winning, beautiful life.

Through purposeful remembering, I have recalled significant events that have shaped and molded my life right up to the present. I will share the words God has given me through his scripture and how those words helped change my thinking and my character. I will share God’s action behind the scenes, which served to guide me even without my knowledge. It has been God all along who has been at work raising me and giving my life value. It was God who lifted me from the shadows of despair and placed me high up in beautiful places filled with joy.

I hope you will see how active God, the Father, has been since the beginning and gain a similar understanding of the value and purpose he gives to your life. God is at work, even if you have no idea who he is or what he is doing for your good. May you come to a deep understanding of this truth and experience his best, both now and forever. May you enjoy the beauty and wonder of being with him and living for him as his child. In remembering I have been lifted up. I share these memories to encourage and help you look at your own life to gain a clear vision of how God can lift up your life.

A Few Things To Ponder

How did this chapter stir your heart?

Have you ever reviewed your past?

Do you fear or avoid your past?

Chapter 2

My Beginnings 1950-1968

In 1950, I was born the second of five siblings to Walter and Judy Collins. God describes all human life when he says …

For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful; I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

Psalms 139:13–16

My parents provided the genes that God used to form my body and mind according to his design for humans. Along with the physical body, God gave me a soul and spirit. These all worked together to produce the person people know as Dave Collins.

The development of Dave Collins progressed just like the lives of all humans. Since the fall of Adam and Eve, humans, including me, are born and grow the same way. I was born and lived not knowing God or going to him for direction. I was the center of everything and was guided by what I wanted and what I believed I could get.

Beginning as infants, our minds take in data and process life experiences to form an incomplete understanding of what we think is true about life, and about our lives specifically. We develop a personality, a pattern of thinking, a life perspective, and a lifestyle that defines who we are. We make choices based on what we want and what we believe will make us happy and make our days go well.

We live life in accordance with our particular family upbringing and process our experiences through our immature thinking. I lived a normal life with ups and downs, developing physically and emotionally. There was, however, always a sense of something missing. I wanted more. I did not understand why I felt that way or what I wanted. I, like everyone who lives apart from God, lived under the assumption that I was in control. I was doomed to fail, because God is the one who makes life and has a design to give humans meaning and joy. God created all humans, including me, in his image and likeness. We need to walk through life with him, experiencing a relationship with him. That relationship brings joy to both the person and God. I didn’t fully understand what I was feeling or what I was missing. I just kept going, always looking for more based on my feelings and desires. I was missing what was needed to live the life I was designed by God to live. I was losing at life.

I was doomed to fail at life by living apart from God and not by his design. I would never live it to the fullest. We must become a child of God, have the Spirit of God living in us, and allow the Spirit to participate with us in life. His Spirit gives the understanding and wisdom needed to make good choices in life, to truly understand life, and to know how we are meant to live.

God loves us and pursues us to get our attention. He helps us realize that something is missing and helps us understand that we cannot acquire that missing element without him. We must come to the place where we know and understand our need to surrender our lives to him. That surrender opens the door for God to give us the gift of a new life. We are born spiritually as a child of God and receive his Spirit, who directs us individually to be the person he designed us to be. As a child of God, we step into God’s glorious light and live life to the fullest.

We become God’s children, reflecting him through our life. Children of God are on a journey beginning on earth and continuing for eternity. What follows is the story of the beginning of my physical life, my birth as a child of God, and my development physically and spiritually. You will see the truths I have learned on this journey.

Things I Learned Before Starting School

My life is a prime example of the process we go through to become a responsible adult. I was born into a good family, with parents who loved their kids. They took care to instruct us and help us grow up with the ability to live well and make choices. They disciplined us and taught us to respect those in authority. We knew about honesty and integrity. We understood responsibility and the value of work. Our words were expected to be honest, and we were taught to fulfill our promises.

My earliest memory goes back to very early childhood. It was Christmas time, and I was recovering from pneumonia. The whole family, along with some extended family members, were in the living room of our home. Everyone was sitting around opening presents, laughing, and enjoying this special day. I was in a large stuffed chair with quilts all around me to keep me warm, and I remember people asking me how I felt and trying to make me feel good. There was a clear sense of love expressed and felt. My mother brought me a present. I could not get the wrapping paper off, so she opened it for me. Inside the box was a yellow Mattel firetruck. I loved it and felt incredibly loved. That feeling is still one of my soul’s greatest desires, and that feeling can be a leading factor in the decisions I make.

But no parents are perfect. My dad had a flaw we called the look. We got the look if we did something he had told us not to do. We knew the minute we got the look that we had to stop what we were doing immediately. If any of his children did something that was particularly offensive to him, he gave that child the look. His eyes narrowed and focused on the culprit with furrowed eyebrows, and his lips came together as well. There was no question when you got the look. No excuses