Witchy, Glitzy, Gamour: Hex Falls Witch Cozy Mystery Series, #6

By Ruby Rivers

All that glitters is not gold.

The stars are out in full force as Hex Falls Hosts the  Movie Awards Ceremony.

Will Murder Mansion lives up to its name?

 

Hollywood's Horror 'B' Movie Awards Ceremony descends upon the tiny town of Hex Falls. The glorious ghouls night gala is to be held at none other than--the newly restored and finally fully renovated-- Murder Mansion.

It's the star's big night, as well as Violet's & Sotherby's, as it marks the official unveiling of Murder Mansion all redone. Nerves are running high, and for good reason, as rumor has it there is a retired movie icon is on the guest list. Harmeena Carmichael, the queen of the 50's scream cinema (the daughter of monster movie icon Isadora Everhorror, the woman who started it all, back in the 30s, by playing sidekick to Godzillia in the silent era) is said to be in attendance tonight. Violet doesn't think things could get more exciting, but is Harmeena really who she claims to be?

Or is there an imposter in their midst.

Lying in wait, planning to pull off the perfect murder?

In the most dramatic way?

 

Witchy, Glitchy, Glamour, book 6 in the Hex Falls Cozy Mystery Series, is a humorous full-length paranormal cozy mystery.

Hex Falls Cozy Mysteries:
Hopeless Pocus, Book 1
Bedknobs & BroomHilda Sticks, Book 2
Witchity, Glitchy, Boo, Book 3
Abracastabra, Book 4
In Charm's Way, Book 5
Witchity, Glitchity, Glamour, Book 6
The Poof! Is in The Pudding, Christmas Novella ~ Completes the Series.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookMarked
• Release date: May 25, 2024
• ISBN: 9798224098354

Book preview

CHAPTER 1

S otherby! Sotherby? Where are you? I charge through the front doors of Murder Manor in search of my dear ghostly friend. Sotherby! Sotherby? Materialize, will you? I’m so excited, I fear I may explode if I don’t get to tell him the news soon. Sotherby, you’ll never believe what I did, I say, my voice rising to a shriek. Sotherby, are you there? I turn in circles, calling out his name, until finally he appears, floating in on a stream of dark billowing smoke. Slowly, he begins to appear in front of me, looking as dazzlingly as ever in his 18th century historical dress. My heart beats faster at the sight of him, ever since our one and only evening of passion together. A shiver washes over me remembering how wonderful it felt to lie in his arms. How I wish we could have held onto that night forever.

His iridescent image slowly transforms from smoke into something more solid before me. Starting with his head and working it ways way down to his toes, until the last of the smoke exchanges itself for human-like features, with the bottoms of his legs slowly morphing into feet, completing him 

What? What have you done? he asks, smiling, as I stare at him, worried.

He’s no longer the gray, near-translucent ghost he once was when we first met. He appears vibrant and nearly fully flesh toned. I blink at him, astonished, my heart pounding hard against my ribs. His coloring has changed so much, even since the last time I saw him. Each new time he materializes before me now, he looks less and less ghost-like and more and more human—a sure sign that our time together is running out. The crisper and clearer Sotherby’s image becomes, the more lifelike he appears, the closer he’s getting to completing the third and final stage of his earthly transition. Which means—I gasp—it won’t be long before he is granted ascension from the purgatory he’s been stuck in here on earth for the last one hundred-plus years, and allowed to move on to wherever it is he’s supposed to be. The thought of him finally passing over brings tears to my eyes, and I have to work hard to suppress them. I know it has to happen. It should happen. It’s what he needs. I sniff. I just don’t know what I’ll do without him when he’s gone.

Did what? Sotherby prompts again, breaking my sad train of thought. Come on now, what’s that saying you like to use so often, he taps his lip, "oh, yes. Spill the tea." 

He breaks out into one his beautiful grins and sends my heart soaring again. Oh yes, the news, I say, growing excited all over again. We did it! We did it! I say, my voice light and bubbly.

Did what? Sotherby asks.  

We landed us the contract! I squee.

What contract? He frowns.

The one that’s going to change both our lives. I sent in an application, and we were chosen! We won!

Won what? Sotherby looks at me, ever more perplexed.

Our glorious manor here, I hold out my hands, your prized Tatyana Antonia, otherwise known as Murder Manor, I grin, has been selected out of thousands of applicants as the official venue of this year’s B-Movie Horror Awards! I clench my fists and squee again. This time more loudly.

Sotherby jolts back from me, looking utterly confused.

It’s a fancy ceremony held every year to celebrate the best of the industry. The film industry, that is. Horror flicks!

 And this is a good thing?

 Of course it is! Without thinking, I grab his hands.

He looks forlornly down at our threaded fingers, then solemnly back up at me. I’d forgotten. We agreed, for both our sakes, to try to leave things as friends. And no longer to pursue a romantic relationship.

We were both finding it too hard, after our little romantic rendezvous recently, to carry on knowing he wouldn’t be around much longer. Though it is a night we’ll both cherish forever, we decided to pack it away in the backs of our memories, along with our feelings, and act as though nothing ever happened between us.

But try as I might, I keep failing at this task. My feelings for Sotherby are just too strong. But he’s right, it’ll be easier on both of us if we break it off now. I couldn’t bear growing closer, knowing he had to go.

But one look in his eyes, and I fall in love with him all over again. I am genuinely struggling to keep my true feelings for him at bay. This all seems to be so much easier for Sotherby.

I push away the empty, aching thought and drop his hands immediately. Sorry, I say.

No, it’s fine. You were saying? His voice cracks.

Oh, only that you are going to be the host of the biggest horror flick award show ever. Or rather, your home is. I grin. You do know what a horror flick is, don’t you?

He scowls. I hesitate to ask.

It’s a kind of movie that features blood and gore.

He frowns.

"That is what we wanted, wasn’t it? For your newly renovated mansion here, or should I say, our mansion... I tilt my head, pride swelling up between my ribs. ...to serve as a renowned location for major big-time events? I look at him, and he blinks at me. That was what we agreed upon, wasn’t it?"

Yes, I suppose. But⁠—

Well, what then?

But it’s not even finished.

Well, it will be, I sing. "Oh, Sotherby, this is going to be the greatest, grandest, most memorable event ever! Held right here at your humble little abode, full of movie stars. I spin around in a circle, hugging myself. Can you believe our luck? He frowns. Now, I know we talked about throwing a formal garden party for the opening, with a dance ball to follow, but this…this will be unforgettable! I spin around again. So much more prestigious and spectacular. Everyone will be talking about it! You will be the star of Hex Falls! I shout. Well, at least your house will, I say. You don’t like the idea, do you?" I ask, nervously scrubbing my hands together, looking longingly into his face.

I didn’t say that, he scoffs, turning his back.

I know. I should have asked, but there wasn’t time. The opportunity arose too quickly. If I hadn’t jumped on it when I saw it come across my phone, well…we wouldn’t be standing here about to host one of the biggest events in all of Hollywood. I grin. Well, okay, maybe not one of the biggest, considering they’re only B-Movie Horror Awards, but it’s still an official Hollywood event. I jerk my head. You’re mad at me, aren’t you? I’m sorry, I wanted so badly to surprise you. I circle him.

Well in that, you have exceeded expectations. He looks at me bitterly.

We’re talking stars here, Sotherby. Movie stars. Loads of them. Crawling all over the place. Why the long face?

He blinks. I dare say, I may be daft. I’ve no idea what you’re going on about. What do you mean by stars, and what do they matter, to you or anyone else? He frowns.

Oh my goodness, that’s right. How could I have forgotten? I smile. You have absolutely no context. You’ve no idea what a star is. How could you know? I look toward the windows. None of that even existed in your time. I turn back to him, tapping my bottom lip. It’s like this, Sotherby, I start, movie stars are famous people. Like modern day, upper-class royalty. Only of the cinematic screen.

Cinematic? He scowls.

That’s what we call motion pictures? You know, like photographs that move. Still, his vacant expression does not recede. Of course you don’t know. They didn’t have moving picture flicks in your time. I try again to rephrase it into an expression he can understand. It’s like the theater, only better, I say.

"Pshaw! he scoffs. There’s nothing better than the theater."

Well, some would beg to differ, I say. You know what, there’s only one way to solve this. I loop my arm through his and tug him forward.

What are you doing? Where are we going? He floats after me.

To see a major motion picture.

What?

I’m taking you to the movies to see the stars for yourself. I grin. Right after you sign the contract. I produce it, calling it up on my phone. On the line right there, please. I point to it.

But that’s not a piece of paper.

Of course it isn’t, silly. It’s called DocuSign. You just put your Lord Sotherby Percival Darlington the Third right there, and we’re done. I smile and point out the line.

With what?

Your fingernail, I say.

Sotherby’s eyes broaden as wide as a pair of dinner plates.

Go on. It won’t bite. Like this. I mock show him how to sign in the air with my nail above the screen. It’s the thoroughly modern way to do things.

Is it now? He half-grins. If you insist. He closes his eyes and scribbles his name down on the screen.

There, now, was that so hard? I say, completing the contract by pressing SEND. This activates an electronic aircraft zoom-like sound as it sails to the lawyers through cyberspace, causing Sotherby to look around.

We’re in, I say and pocket my phone as Sotherby continues to look for the origin of the noise. Come on, we’d better get cracking, or we’ll miss the opening.

But— He hunkers back.

But what? They have popcorn and everything.

He looks at me worriedly. I thought you said we should never be seen in public together. How on earth are we to sit together and watch a film without someone noticing?

Easy. I will look like I’m alone. As I’m the only one who’ll be seen. No one but me will even know you’re there.

But won’t you look like a crazy person sitting all alone in a theater, talking to yourself?

No, I won’t because no one is allowed to talk during the film. Now come on, or we’ll be late. I press open the front doors. Oh, and by the way, let’s not tell anyone about our grand re-opening plan until the contract is formally accepted. I don’t want to screw up our luck. I bite my lip.

As if I have anyone to tell, Sotherby mumbles, and I laugh and squeeze his arm closer, then throw up a hand, about to fly us away.

What are you doing now? Sotherby panics.

Why, transporting us there with magic, of course. Now that you’ve wasted so much time.

Speaking of time, how do you expect to finish this place and all before Saturday?

Well, we only have the study to finish, and the porch. It shouldn’t be that difficult.

"Yes, the study…" he muses, dragging out the word, looking a million miles away.

What’s the matter? I ask, and he blinks at me rapidly.

Oh, nothing, he says. It’s just—well…after that, the renovation will be complete.

At last, I laugh. Everything will finally be remodeled from tip to tail, just as you asked of me. I smile brightly, and he hangs his head. That is what you wanted, wasn’t it? I ask, growing worried. For the manor to be redone?

Oh yes. Y-yes, of course. He nods.

Then why the long expression?

It’s just… he starts. I guess, with the size of it, I’d kind of hoped you’d never finish. His voice wobbles, and he drops his gaze to the porch. But I guess, once you’re finished and the galas are over, he mumbles, then looks up, tears cresting his lids. You’ll be gone.

Oh, Sotherby. I fall forward, breaking all our rules. You can’t get rid of me that easily. I cup his cool face in my hands. The job might be over, but our friendship won’t be, ever, I say. That is, if you don’t mind me visiting you all the time. I grin, then bite my lip, trying not to cry.

He gazes longingly into my eyes. I’d have it no other way. He smiles, and my heart pounds rapidly beneath my shirt.

At that, I fling myself into his arms and give him the hugest hug, not caring about our little agreement. I know I’ve broken it, but I don’t care.

Sotherby stands stoic, unresponsive, and I nearly pull away, embarrassed, but then he reaches around, patting me on the back, and I sink deeper into my hug.

I’m sorry, I say, breaking away from him.

Please, don’t be, he whispers, pulling me back. I look up at him, teary-eyed, and he quickly looks away. I guess, I just thought we’d have more time.

So did I, Sotherby, I whisper into his chest in a low, pain-filled voice. So did I.

For a long moment, we just stand there, in each other’s arms, not moving, not speaking. The movie? I say at last, inside a sniff, trying to straighten up. We’d better get going. We’re going to miss the movie. I throw up an arm and conjure us there, using magic.

CHAPTER 2

We land just outside the doors of the cinema on the opposite side of the street, while no one is present. Or at least, those who are there are too busy paying for tickets or staring up at the marquee to pay us any attention. Thank goodness.

Why, would you look at that? I point up at the marquee myself. What luck? The new Johnny Depp flick is playing. My eyes bolt open wide.

Johnny what?

Depp. He’s one of the very best. Well, at least, in my opinion, I tell Sotherby, snuggling closer to him. Or at least he used to be. He’s had a rough time of it lately, so we need to support him. You should have seen him as Edward Scissorhands. I nod. "And in Pirates of the Caribbean. He makes a mean Jack Sparrow."

Scissorhands? Sotherby gulps.

Oh yes. It’s just an expression. Or a character, I guess. Anyway, we’ll rent it later. We’d better get going. I drag him forward. Oh, and look. I stop, looking up at the giant movie poster just beyond the ticket lady’s head. He’s starring with Meryl Streep, I say dreamily. My goodness, what more could we ask for? I clasp my hands together against my chest, my heart pounding beneath them. You’re in for a real treat, I tell Sotherby, then look back at the poster again. My two favorites together at last on the big screen. How could this have happened?

I’m afraid, again, I’ve no idea what you’re talking about.

Of course you don’t, but you will. I step up to the ticket booth. Two tickets please—I mean, one. I smile.

Sotherby stares at the movie poster over my shoulder, blinking. So, this Meryl Streep, she’s good then? he whispers.

Only the best? She’s the very queen of cinema. I smile back at him and take my ticket, and we enter under the flashing pergola of lights. I stop dead before entering the second set of double doors to the interior of the cinema. Oh my goodness. I stare up at the stars’ photos on the wall. I almost didn’t notice. The film is also co-starring the great-granddaughter of the silent film star Vilma Banky, rival of the famed May Wray.

Who’s May Wray?

Only one of the greatest silent movie stars that ever was. Or perhaps I’m wrong on that. I guess she became most famous in the talkies.

The what?

The talkies. I smile. Back before there was sound, the movies were known as silent. Then they added sound, and they became the talkies.

Sotherby pulls another face.

Oh, never mind. Point being, May Wray was one of the stars at the time whose career was lucky enough to survive the transition, making the leap from silent film actress into sound, unlike many others, like Norma Talmadge, Mary Pickford, and poor Vilma Banky. I